The Sheik's Secret Bride (9 page)

Callie watched as Luca and Zahir played in the water.  She hadn’t stepped into the lake since arriving, preferring to cool off with the shower that had been installed on the deck instead.  Every time she tried to jump into the water, her irrational fears about bugs and dirt crept up and she shook her head, stepping back to her deck chair, picking up her book and letting the boys continue playing. 

It was now the end of the week and she wasn’t sure what was going to happen.  Luca had blossomed under Zahir’s presence.  Before, he might throw a temper tantrum when he was too tired or too hungry.  But the two times it had happened this week, Zahir had calmly pulled him aside and explained that he was not allowed to do this.  He was a prince and others would look to him for how to behave. If he started to throw a fit, then others would think it was okay.  And it isn’t okay. 

The first time Callie had heard Zahir try to explain that to Luca, she thought about intervening.  Luca was a four-year-old boy.  He was hungry and tired, it was normal for him to express himself since he didn’t have the words.  But as she watched, her amazing son pulled himself together, nodded to his father and walked as calmly as possible back to Callie.  The feeling was still in his eyes and her heart contracted with love for the little man who was trying so hard to impress his father.  She’d gotten him some food or helped him settle down for his nap.  But it had only happened twice and she wasn’t sure she liked that.  She wanted him to be a little boy.

When she’d argued with Zahir about that, he’d disagreed.  “He isn’t just a little boy,” he’d explained with absolute finality.  “He will be a ruler someday, Callie.  He has to start learning this at an early age.”

Callie didn’t agree, but she also knew that there wasn’t much she could do about it while Zahir was around. 

But that begged the next question, what was going to happen when Zahir left?  Luca loved him!  Luca worshiped Zahir!  What was going to happen when he was gone?

She didn’t want to think about that, so she pushed the issue out of her mind, glancing down at her book.  She would discuss that tonight after dinner, when Luca was in bed and he couldn’t overhear their conversation.

She gritted her teeth, thinking about what normally happened after dinner.  Zahir waited in the hallway for her after she tucked Luca into bed.  And there was no way of denying him.  He simply didn’t wait long enough for her to tell him no.  As soon as the lights to Luca’s room were turned off, Zahir swept Callie into his arms and made love to her for the rest of the night. 

Callie was quiet during dinner that night.  They were scheduled to leave tomorrow and she had no idea what was going on inside his head.  She wanted to talk to him about that, but conversations of that magnitude would take courage.  And she also needed time alone to figure out what was going on inside her mind.  She didn’t have either.

She was afraid to talk to Zahir about their plans because that would mean facing a future with or without him.  Which one did she want?  Which would be healthier for herself and Luca?  She had no idea.  Nor did she know which outcome she even wanted.  No matter how hard she tried to avoid Zahir’s arms, she still fell into them every night, enjoyed the passion and sensuality that Zahir could give her.  And lately, she hadn’t been trying very hard to avoid his arms and his bed. 

As she watched her boys talk, Zahir telling Luca stories about his country and the people, she wondered what it would be like to go back with him.  Was it really different?  She’d grown up with stories of countries that had been fighting with each other for decades.  Those countries negotiated peace then started fighting again.  They claimed to want peace, but they were too busy fighting to really try for peace.  And his country had been fighting with its enemies for years!  How could they move on and want peace?  How could Zahir guarantee that war wouldn’t break out again? 

But, in this case, it wasn’t as if a whole generation had been raised to know war.  A decade was a long time, but it was only ten years.  People remembered the peace before the war.  Could it work? 

Or was she just setting herself up for a crushing disappointment?  And what would happen if they went back to Larcatia and war broke out?  Callie had been watching Zahir teach Luca how to be a leader.  It was amazing to see her little man try to imitate his father, but he was still a little boy.  Would Zahir want his son by his side if war broke out again?  Would Zahir teach their son how to battle?   Would he be in the line of fire?  Would bullets be racing by her son’s head? 

The thought of Luca in a war zone chilled her body despite the August heat. 

She looked up, suddenly realizing that there was silence. 

“What’s wrong?” Zahir asked.

Callie’s skin was cold as worry over the future washed over her yet again.  “Nothing,” she replied, forcing herself to smile. 

Zahir wasn’t fooled.  She was worried about something and he was tired of her trying to hide her concerns from him.  How could he show her that things would be okay if she didn’t talk to him?  “You’re not eating your dinner.”

Luca straightened up.  “You promised you wouldn’t try to diet this week, Momma,” he admonished her.

Callie had to laugh because only six days in Zahir’s presence and he was already taking on his father’s commanding tone and his mannerisms.  “I’m not,” she assured him.

His eyes looked down at her plate, then at his own and his fathers, while her dinner had barely been touched.  “Then why haven’t you eaten any of your dinner?”

Callie glanced down at her plate, realizing that Luca was right.  She’d barely touched the grilled chicken and salad she’d made for dinner.  Looking over at Zahir’s plate, the two pieces of chicken and enormous salad she’d served him were gone and more than half of Luca’s was finished.  She was the only one who hadn’t been able to eat anything.  “I guess I’m just not hungry tonight,” she told both of them.  That was the truth, but she knew that there was so much more to it than just appetite. 

When she took the plates away, she avoided Zahir’s too-knowing eyes as she stacked the dishes into the dishwasher. 

She felt Zahir touch her shoulder and she spun around, gripping the countertop behind her.

“Sorry,” he said and the concern in those dark eyes soothed her faster than his words could.  "I’ll get Luca ready for bed.  You look tired.” 

She smiled, grateful for his help.  “Thanks,” she said and pushed her hair back off of her face.  Zahir moved closer, pressing her body gently against his.  “What’s wrong?” he asked softly, his hand smoothing the hair she’d just pushed out of her way.  “You’ve been tense all day long.”

She forced a smile, but it wasn’t very convincing.  “You’ve been keeping me up most nights,” she replied.  “I’m just a bit wiped out.”

His fingers continued to smooth back her hair and he didn’t look convinced that a lack of sleep was her biggest concern.  “We’ll just sleep tonight,” he promised her. 

Callie’s lips compressed uneasily.  “Sleep?” she asked, feeling her chest tighten with his promise.  This was their last night together.  Why was he going to let her sleep?  Did he not want her any longer?  Had she done something last night to turn him off?

“Stop,” he commanded with a gentle but firm tone. 

“What?” she asked, more than a little breathless, both from her thoughts and fears as well as the way he was touching her. 

“Something is going through your mind and it most likely isn’t good.”

She laughed a bit because he was right.  “Like I said, I’m just tired.”

“You’re on vacation.  Why don’t you let the household staff do the cleaning for you?”

“We’ve discussed this, Zahir.  I don’t like being surrounded by servants.”

Zahir sighed as he pulled her closer, not sure how to help this stubbornly independent woman.  Resting his chin on her head, he searched his mind for some way to get her to accept her position in his life.  She was his queen, although he’d never really told her that much.  She should have deduced it by now though.  But looking around, he knew that this wasn’t his normal world.  He’d instructed his guards to keep to the woods as much as possible and he’d dismissed his other staff, wanting this time with Callie and Luca to get to know them once more.  The guards and servants were on standby and knew to appear quickly when needed and disappear when they weren’t.

Other than her refusal to be pampered, he was thrilled with the way the week had gone.  His son was a boy a father could be proud of.  He was smart, adorable, considerate and observant.  He was everything his people would need to lead them. 

Callie was still the kindest, sweetest woman he’d ever met.  And their passion had only increased over the week as he’d reintroduced her to the sensuality of her body.  She’d suppressed it over the past five years, but it hadn’t taken him long to get her to accept this aspect of her personality.  He still initiated all of their lovemaking, but she was a very active participant.  The only downside to the week was that she hadn’t admitted her feelings for him.  He wanted to hear that she loved him but she was holding back, still refusing to accept that they would be together.  And since she didn’t believe they had a future, she wouldn’t admit her feelings. 

“It is time, Callie,” he told her the following morning as he held her close. 

Callie tensed, wondering what he meant.  She thought about that statement, knew that she needed to ask the question but there were two questions she could ask.  And she didn’t like the answer to either of those questions. 

She closed her eyes, wishing she could stop this moment from happening.  “I don’t want this week to end.”

He kissed her again.  “I have to return to Larcatia.”

She didn’t want that to happen.  Either she wouldn’t see him again or he wanted to bring her with him.  Both bad scenarios.  “No,” she whispered, denying both options.

His hands slid up and down her bare arms, feeling the goose bumps rise up.  “I’ve loved our time here together.  But we must return.”

She heard that “we” and didn’t like that at all.  But she couldn’t deny that there was a surge of relief in knowing that he hadn’t planned on leaving her.  She thought about that for a long moment, but then shook her head.  “I can’t go back, Zahir.  I just can’t do it.”

He took her hands and led her over to one of the sofas.  “I have to return.  This was our honeymoon, the time together that we were denied after our wedding.”

She tried to pull her hands away but he only held them more firmly in his.  “The wedding I didn’t even know that we had,” she told him with a grimace, still angry with him for that little omission. 

He wasn’t going to tell her that their marriage was already being celebrated by his entire country, not to mention in Tularia, Altair and Lurasa.  All four countries regarded his marriage as more evidence that things were going well.  “Yes, well, I have a great many responsibilities.  And I need you by my side.  I need my son to be introduced to his people.  And I need you, Callie.  I need you to be with me and help me.”

Five years ago, she’d wanted that so badly.  She’d been thrilled when he’d taken her to his homeland and had dreamed about hearing those words.  She’d loved Larcatia and all of the warm-hearted people she’d met.  Until that one man.  Those three days, three nightmarish days and nights of hell in one man’s sick, demented world.  She shook her head.  “I can’t do it,” she said and the trembling started up again.  She buried her face in his chest.  “I just can’t go back there.  I went with you the first time and I was so in love with you that I didn’t care that there were scary things that I should be afraid of.  But now I know and…” her voice cracked at the idea of what she’d gone through.

Zahir hadn’t wanted to tell her this, but if it would reassure her, she had to know.  “He’s dead, love,” he told her. 

Callie’s whole body froze.  “What do you mean?”

“He’s dead.  The man who kidnapped you, he’s gone.  He will never hurt you again.”

She looked up into his dark eyes, her soft, golden ones unsure about what he was saying.  “What do you mean?  And how can you be sure?” She felt her heart pounding in her chest and her skin turned clammy. 

He kept his hands on her waist.  “I am sure.” 

She shivered, thinking that he wasn’t going to come right out and tell her, but she suspected that he’d killed that horrible man. 

Callie knew that she should be relieved.  But it bothered her that Zahir’s soul was now marred by that gruesome man as well as hers.  “You didn’t have to do that,” she whispered fervently.

Zahir couldn’t believe she was saying that.  Any man who hurt his family knew the consequences.  “He hurt you.  I could not let him get away with that.  But you don’t need to worry about him.  Never again can he hurt you.”

She shivered.  “I still can’t go back there, Zahir.  Why can’t we just leave things the way they are?”

He sighed and let his hands drift through her golden hair.  “Because things always change.  And I will not leave my wife here.  I would never ask you to be without Luca either.”

She gasped as the pain of not seeing her son stabbed through her heart.  “You’d take Luca?” she asked, but she could see the answer in his eyes. 

“I will not take him away from you.  But yes, he must come home.  He must learn to rule his people.”

She didn’t like the sound of that.  “He shouldn’t have to do this,” she told him, falling back on her anger.  “He should be allowed to choose his future.”

Zahir took her hand and led her to the cars that had been waiting patiently.  “Luca has a future.  He will decide how to rule Larcatia.”

Callie felt defeated but she had to rally.  This was too important.  For all three of them.  She had to fight for their future and somehow, they had to all be together.  “There has to be an alternative,” she begged, not getting into the limousine. 

Zahir had to be firm.  “There is no alternative, Callie.  You are my wife.  I want you by my side and Luca needs you.  We are returning to Larcatia today.”  He wanted to be patient with her, but he couldn’t give her more time.

“I won’t go!” she told him, panic welling up inside of her.  She tried to be brave, to fight for both herself and for Luca, but looking into his eyes, she knew that it was a pointless effort.  As the truth of their future settled into her mind, anger and tears welled up.  She couldn’t be without Luca and Luca was going back with Zahir.  Rationally, she knew that this was what needed to happen.  It was the right thing to do.  But she shook her head, angry at how fate had twisted her comfortable, safe world so suddenly. 

“I won’t love you, Zahir!  I will hate you for making me do this.”

He kissed her forehead, ignoring the way she tried to pull away.  “Then I will have to find ways to make you happy.”

Zahir continued to stand there, looking down at her. 

Callie considered running away, but she knew that she wouldn’t be able to get far.  Nor would Zahir let her run.  He was too close and his reactions were heightened by years of war.  He was a soldier and she could see the determination in his eyes.

In the end, she got into the car but only because she was determined to protect her son.  And she had faith that she would eventually figure out a way to convince Zahir that living in Larcatia wasn’t the best solution for any of them.  She had to be smarter, more creative in her arguments.  This was a battle she could not lose!