The Strange Healing (13 page)

Heath was nodding his head, thinking.  “That might actually be real helpful, Phil.  She was concerned about being the only grown woman to be spanked.  This might work out real well, as long as your wife doesn't scare her off before we even get started.”

Phil smiled as he said, “If she scares her off too bad I'll just have a little discussion with her, and send her back to talk to Sara again.”

Heath laughed, and Phil joined in.  “Phil, let's just hope that's not necessary.” 

Checking his watch, Heath took out his phone and called Heather.  “Hi, Heather.  I'm done with my errand, but I thought I'd check before I come back.  Are you two done talking, or do you want more time alone?”

“
Can you give us another half hour, then check back?”

“
Sure.  Everything going okay?”

“
Yeah, fine.”  She paused a moment, then whispered, “She just left the room for a minute.  Real quick,  you are serious about her, aren't you, Heath?  I mean, really serious?”

“
Heather?”

“
No, no, I'm not trying to say you should be, or push you, I really need to know.  I won't tell her what you say, but I need to know so I know while we're talking.  Trust me, big brother.”

He thought he knew what she was getting at, so he told her, “Very serious, Heather.  Honestly.”

“Okay, that's what I thought, but I had to know for sure.  Call me back in half an hour.  Talk to you then.”  She hung up, and Heath stared at his phone, hoping he'd just done the right thing.

“
Heath, are you all right?”  Phil was a little concerned.  “You look a little pale.  What did she do now?”

“
I'm not sure, but it could be good.”  Since he had an extra half hour to wait, he related their conversation, and they talked about why she'd want to know his feelings for Sara.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The girls were engrossed in a heavy conversation of their own.  Heather gave Sara a hug and said, “Thank you for sharing with me what you talked to Heath about.  I know how hard that was.”

“
It was, but I felt a lot better after I talked to Heath about it, just like he said I would.  You've been such a good friend I wanted you to know, too, especially since you guys are letting me stay with you a few days.  Now I won't have to feel like I'm hiding something from you any more.”

“
You've been through a lot, Sara.  I don't think I would have made it through when our parents died if I wouldn't have had Heath with me.  I'm so sorry you went through all that yourself.  Not to mention the guys at the beach.  I know that brought back bad memories.”

“
Yeah.”

“
Heath's right, though, you know.  None of that stuff was your fault, and you can't go through life blaming yourself for everything.”

“
I see that now that he explained it to me.  But how do I stop?  I mean, I've just accepted the fact when something happens I probably could have done something different and there would have been a different outcome.  How do I stop thinking that?  I don't want to start doing the opposite and not take the blame for anything.”

“
Trust me, Sara, Heath can help you with that.  You're smart, you'll know for yourself in no time, but let him help you for now.”  Taking a chance, hoping to keep her talking, she asked, “Has he suggested anything, any idea he has to help?”

She blushed, but she said, “Yeah, sort of.  He said he wants me to feel guilt free, to see how good it feels, and he has an idea for that.”

“I hadn't even thought of that before, but if you've blamed yourself for all these things, you must be on a constant guilt trip.”  Thinking a minute, she continued, “Wow.  I couldn't stand that, Sara.  Guilt about tears me up.  Anytime I really mess up I feel bad.  I feel terrible until Phil, or sometimes Heath, makes me pay.  The feeling afterwards, when the guilt is gone, is blissful.  I feel like the world's been put back on its axis again.”

“
What do you mean, they make you pay?”

Now it was Heather's turn to blush, but she was honest with her friend.  “They spank me.”

Sara's mouth fell open.  “Seriously?”

“
Oh, very seriously, believe me.  Last night after you went to bed, Phil took me into our bedroom and over his knee.  He very seriously let me know he wasn't happy about a few things.”

“
Like what?”  She immediately waved her hands and said, “No, I'm sorry.  That's none of my business.  What I meant is, was it because of me?”

“
Why would it be because of you?  Sara, you have to stop thinking of everything as being your fault.  How could Phil being upset with me last night be your fault?”

“
No, Heather, you don't understand.  I'm afraid it really was my fault.  When Heath talked to you about not trying to push us together, that was because of me.  It was my fault.”

“
How so?”

“
I'm so sorry, Heather.  I told him you might have tried to push a bit.”

“
Well, I did.  And I'm sorry.  I shouldn't have done that.  But what did you do to be sorry for?”

“
I shouldn't have told him.”

“
Let me ask you something.  Did you volunteer that information or did he ask you?”

“
He asked.”

“
So what else could you have done?  You had to either tell him or lie to him, and trust me, you don't want to lie to Heath, or Phil.”

Her eyes were big as she asked, “Why?  Do they spank you if you lie to them?”

“Absolutely.  Really, Sara, you did nothing wrong.  Stop worrying about it.”

“
But Phil spanked you last night because of me.”

“
No, he didn't.  He spanked me last night for several things.  That was one of them, but it wasn't because of what you did, it was because of what I did.”  She waited a bit before adding, “Besides, I needed it.  I feel a lot better today.”

Sara's eyes were huge, and Heather had to laugh.  “You've never been spanked before, have you?”

“No,” she admitted, “but Heath said he thinks he should.”

Heather studied her carefully.  “That's what his suggestion is to help you feel guilt free, isn't it?”

“Yes.”

“
Sara, I think you should let him.”

“
But he said it will hurt.”

“
He's right.  It will hurt.”

“
But you think I should let him?”

“
Yes, for two main reasons.  One is there is nothing I know of that works so well to take away that guilty feeling.  You feel really free afterward, like a great weight's been lifted from your shoulders.”

“
That's what Heath said, that it would rid me of my guilt.”

“
Believe him, Sara.  It really does.  Also, though, I know Heath.  He'll only take the time and effort to correct you if he really cares about you.”

“
When you say correct, you mean spank?”

“
No, I mean correct.  Spanking is only a part of it.  If he spanks you, he won't just spank you.  He talks to you first and makes sure you know what it is you did wrong, why it was wrong, and what you could have done differently.  Then afterward he holds you and reassures you, tells you how special you are to him while you calm down.  Afterwards you feel free of the guilt you had, and you feel so loved and cared for.  I really can't describe that feeling, how good it is.  It's something you just have to feel for yourself.”

“
You make it sound like you like getting spanked.”

“
I hate getting spanked, but I love how I feel afterwards.  Mostly when I get spanked now it's by Phil, and it's the same as with Heath.  I feel very special and loved.”

Sara thought a bit.  “Can I ask a personal question?”

“Sure.”

“
Have you ever been spanked by anyone else?

“
Just my parents when I was little.”  She looked at Sara and said, “I can't imagine letting anyone spank me that didn't care a lot about me.”

“
That's what I thought.”

“
Sara, that's the other reason I think you should let Heath spank you.  He really cares about you.  I know he does, or he wouldn't even consider spanking you.  And spanking will bring you two even closer together.  I really think you should let him try it.  If you try it once and don't want to let him do it again, all you have to do is tell him.  He will not do it again if you tell him no.”

“
I've got a lot to think about.”

“
Yep.  While you're thinking about it, feel free to ask me anything.  We can talk about anything you want.”

“
Okay, thanks.”  Sara looked hesitant as she asked, “You said Phil spanked you last night.  Was that not long after I went to bed?”

Smiling, Heather answered, “Yes, I'd say that's what you heard last night.  I'm sorry we woke you up.”

“Oh, that's all right, no need to feel sorry.  In fact, if I wouldn't have heard it we wouldn't be having this talk, and it's been very enlightening for me.  Especially since Heath has suggested we try it.  Thank you for being so honest with me.”

“
You're welcome.  Looking at this a bit selfishly, if you give Heath a chance and try his idea, I think you'll see how much better you feel.  But then you and I will be able to share our feelings, both the frustration and the joy, with each other.  It would be wonderful to have someone to talk to about our guys and their unique way of loving us.”

After a bit she added, “I am serious, Sara. 
If you have any more questions while you're thinking about this, feel free to ask, okay?”

“
Okay, thanks.  I do have one more question now.”

“
Sure.  What is it?”

“
I'd like Phil to know about my past, too, so that if we're talking and something upsets me I can talk about it openly.”

“
Good point.”

“
But as nice as he seems, I don't know him as well as you and Heath, and I'm not sure I could get through saying it again, especially since I don't know him quite as well.”

“
I understand what you're saying.  Would you like me to tell him for you?”

“
Would you, please?”

“
Sure, if you want me to.”

“
I do.  I want him to know, I just don't want to tell him.” 

They were both laughing about how that sounded when Heather's phone rang.  “That's Heath, I'm sure.  Are we ready for him to come back?”

“Yeah.  Thanks, Heather, for talking to me.”

“
No problem, Sara.”  She answered the phone and told her brother to come on back and bring Phil with him so they could go get some lunch.

An hour later Heath and Sara sat in a b
ooth across from Phil and Heather, having lunch.

Heath asked, “Did you girls have a nice talk this morning?”

Sara answered, “Yes, we definitely did, Heath.  Thank you for inventing an errand to run to give us the chance to talk.”

Heath sheepishly asked, “It was that obvious?”

“Of course it was,” she assured him, “but I appreciate it, so everything's good.”

Phil smiled, enjoying his brother-in-law's embarrassment.

Sara went on to say, “Heath, there's something I want to tell you.”

His eyebrows rose in curiosity as he said, “Okay.”

“Well, when you finally convinced me that I'd feel better if I talked to you, I wasn't too sure, but you were right.  I felt much better after talking to you.”

“I'm glad, Sweetheart.”

“So, I thought about it and decided that I should tell Heather, too.”  Heath was a bit surprised, but nodded his head, encouraging her.  “So I told her while you were running your errand.”

Heath leaned over and kissed her cheek.  “I'm proud of you, Sara.  I know that wasn't easy for you to do.”

“No, it wasn't, but I feel better.”  She looked over at Phil and told him, “And Phil, I want you to know my history and the memories I'm fighting, as well, but I'm sorry, I just don't think I can go through it again yet.”

Phil reached over to pat her hand as he said, “No need to apologize, Sara.  Take your time.  Thank you for the trust you must have in me to want to share that with me.”

“Thank you for all you've done to earn my trust.  And that's a real feat, too, because I don't give my trust freely.  Anyway, I've asked Heather to tell you.  I just wanted you to know.”

Phil smiled and said, “Thank you.”

Heath told her, “While Phil's earned your trust, you've earned my respect, Honey.  I'm proud of you, telling them.  I think it's wonderful; I know how much strength it takes to share it with other people.”