“Goodnight,” I muttered, briefly noting her confusion before turning away and walking from the kitchen.
Leaving her standing there staring after me was one of the hardest things I’d ever done in my life. My thoughts were of her as I made my way to the stairs. Hank jumped down from the couch and followed after me. I was a coward, but at least I had enough sense to know when to walk away. In the long run, Miley would thank me. I was doing us both a favor. She didn’t need all of my hang ups, and I had plenty of them… too many to count. She and Sierra deserved far better than the likes of me. I had nothing to offer them.
I tossed my towel on the floor when I got in my room. While I was lying in bed replaying the events of the day over in my mind, there was a soft knock upon my door. I’d left it partially open, just in case Sierra or Miley needed me during the middle of the night. She stood there in the doorway. The light from the hallway served as a backdrop highlighting her strawberry golden hair that casted a halo above her head. My attention was drawn to the tempting curves of her delectable body. She might as well have been naked with that light shining behind her and through her thin nightgown. She graced me with a timid half-smile, but it was easy to tell something was wrong from her expression.
“Are you asleep, Nate?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. The room was dark.
“Nah. Can’t sleep.” I would probably need at least half a pot of coffee in the morning just to function. I doubted I’d sleep at all after seeing her in that nightgown. “Anything the matter?” I asked. If someone were outside, Hank would be barking his foolish head off instead of lying on the other side of the bed softly snoring.
“I’m sorry about the wall.”
It took a minute for her words to fully register since the view before me was so damn distracting.
Ah, Sierra and her masterpiece.
“It’s no big deal. No worries. I planned on painting it anyway,” I said, hoping to put her at ease.
Really, it was nothing.
“I’ll help you paint,” she offered.
At hearing her voice, Hank stirred and stretched his legs. Suddenly, paws were digging into my side. Without thinking, I pushed him away. When my gaze met hers once more, it was impossible not to notice the direction of her stare. Instantly, I was hard. She might as well had been touching me. Now all I could do was imagine those slim hands of hers caressing my body. I tugged the blanket up since it had settled low on my hips. I was dangerously close to embarrassing myself.
Damn, she was killing me!
“Is he always like that?” she asked, motioning at Hank. Despite my current need, I managed to chuckle.
“Yeah, if I shut the door, he sits outside and whines. You should take him to your room for the night.” I offered, amazed that I could form a complete thought, let alone speak. I watched as a beautiful smile blossomed on her lips.
“Try sleeping with a four-year-old,” she retorted, wrinkling her nose. “I just wanted to apologize for Sierra. I should let you get some sleep.”
Ever since she’d been under my roof, sleep had been the one thing that had eluded me.
I should send her away. It would be the smart thing to do, but for the life of me… I couldn’t. I wanted her to stay right here with me.
“Well, goodnight, Nate,” she said, her eyes lingering on me as she took a step back. I wanted to stop her.
“Goodnight, Miley,” I whispered, staring at the now empty spot where she’d just stood. The soft sound of her footsteps echoed in the hall.
I scooted down in the bed with my head sinking further into my pillow and stared blankly up at the ceiling.
It was of no fucking use, so why even try to fight it.
My hand slipped slowly down the muscled ridges of my stomach to disappear beneath the sheet. I closed my eyes on a strangled groan as Miley starred front and center in every one of my dirtiest fantasies.
THE DAYS HAD
settled into a routine that flowed effortlessly, like water from a spout. Miley and Sierra’s presence in the house were now second nature to me. Between the two of them, they’d managed to chase away most of my dark thoughts. It was only at night, when I lay alone in my bed, that my mind began to wonder. Despite temptation, I’d even managed to keep my hands to myself. The only downside was I’d never jerked off so much in my life, well, not since I was a teenager.
A guy did what he had to do in order to get by.
Three weeks had passed, and there was still no sign of Ryder Blade. That slimy bastard was probably somewhere laying low, at least that’s what my gut was telling me. Those feelings or premonitions had yet to steer me wrong. There wasn’t a doubt in my mind that Blade would turn up like the proverbial bad penny. Gran had always loved that old saying. It had been one of her favorites. I wasn’t foolish enough to let my guard down for a second. I’d be waiting for that snake to strike.
With Cecil and my connections at the local police department, there was a sense of peace in knowing that more eyes than mine were watching after Miley and Sierra. The daycare had finally been made aware of the situation, even though Miley and I’d argued over that one. In the end, I’d won. It was for the best. We couldn’t take any chances with that scumbag. Blade might not know yet that Sierra was his child, but the man wasn’t stupid. It wouldn’t take him long to connect the dots and figure it out.
Last night during dinner, Matt’s name had flashed across her caller id. Miley’s phone had been lying out in the open for anyone to see. It wasn’t like I’d been snooping. She just didn’t answer it. We were eating, but it made me curious. If there was any bad blood between the two of them, they’d have to sort that shit out for themselves. The Matt I remembered had been a reasonable guy.
Had he changed that much in last eight years?
Sierra never mentioned her grandparents either, which I found somewhat strange. To my knowledge, neither she nor Miley had seen them once since they moved in with me. Well, not technically moved in, but the last time we’d returned to Miley’s house for clothes, we had come back with a whole lot more than just an overnight bag.
Miley had made good on her offer to help paint, and we’d ended up painting all of the bedrooms upstairs, along with the bathroom and the hallway. Currently, we were working on the downstairs. When Miley and I made the trip to Stanton’s for more paint and rollers, the old man had given me a sly grin and a wink. Miley had had him eating out of her hand. Thanks to her charm, I’d managed to purchase the paint at a ten percent discount. There were perks to having her around. The more time I spent with her, the more I realized she was so much more than a killer body and a beautiful face. Hell, in no time, she could have me waxing poetic with nothing more than a bat of her lashes. I was turning into a sap… a grade A, number one pussy. If Matt were around, he would be laughing his ass off at me, but only after he beat mine for whatever I had going on with his sister. I was still trying to figure that one out.
Every night at bedtime, I read Sierra a story and then Miley would tuck her in for the night. Here lately, those soft glances from Miley’s sky blue eyes and her gentle smiles were starting to wear me thin. I could only take so much, but I refused to cross that line — even if, at times, the line blurred. This wasn’t permanent. They could never be mine.
Hank was on my heels, impatient as fuck. He needed to go outside and take a piss. I was the first one up, and thankfully it was Sunday. Last night, Sierra had convinced me to watch
The Fox and the Hound
. Yeah, I’d finally purchased a TV and a DVD player, but we still didn’t have cable. I drew the line there. Gran would be rolling over in her grave if she knew a television set had found its way inside her house. Half-awake, I made my way down the hall dressed only in a pair of faded blue jeans. Hank’s constant whining made it impossible to sleep. When you had to go, you had to go.
“We’d still be in the bed if it wasn’t for you and your tiny bladder,” I grumbled, and reached down to scratch him behind the ear before opening the front door. When I pushed the screen door aside, he was in such a hurry he bumped my leg then sailed from the porch into the yard with his nose to the ground looking for a spot to do his business.
The sound of a vehicle approaching had me rubbing the sleep from my eyes as I stared down the graveled road watching as a newer model silver Ford pick-up rolled up in the driveway and parked.
Who the hell was that at this time of the morning?
It was only a little after nine, and though I was usually up before now, last night had done me in. Sierra had the life force of a tiny F5 tornado. Yawning, I stood in the doorway and waited for the stranger to climb out of the truck.
Hell, I knew him! I didn’t need this shit this early in the morning.
Barefoot, I stepped out onto the porch and watched as he drew closer.
Warm, brown eyes flecked with green regarded me curiously. A half grin, so much like the one I saw each morning in the mirror, hesitantly curved his lips. His hair was a shade lighter than mine, but we both had the same build and were tall and muscular.
“Nate Lucas?” he asked, flashing a set of dimples identical to mine.
I nodded in reply, waiting. He held out his hand, but instead of taking his, I shoved both hands into my pockets, fisting them and rocking back on my heels. It was rude, but I didn’t care. I never asked for any of this.
“I’m Miles Lucas,” he said, with his hand outstretched. When he noted mine were not moving from my pockets, he finally dropped his hand. “I’m your brother.”
If he expected me to be surprised by his statement, then he was sadly mistaken. I already knew everything about him, including the internship he was currently performing at Crawley Hospital. In a bout of temporary insanity, I had driven to Crawley. I’d been determined to meet him that night, but Kara Thorn had waylaid me outside of the hospital. It was just as well. Then, shit had happened, and the longer I stayed away and stewed on the knowledge that someone else out there shared my DNA, the more I decided it best to let sleeping dogs lie. It was un-telling what can of worms I’d unearth by pursing a relationship with a brother I’d never met. I eyed him coolly, carefully assessing his features. Yeah, from what I could tell, we were both chips off the old block according to the photos I’d seen of my gran’s.
Fucking prizes, we were.
“I realize this must come as a surprise to you. I’ve been meaning to stop by for a while. About a year ago, I hired a private detective to dig into my past.”
“
Well, he wasn’t the only one, and I didn’t plan on telling him that I’d done the exact same thing.
“You wasted your time,” I informed him, and couldn’t help but notice his disappointment. He was so easy to read. If it hadn’t been for my gran, I would have been alone in this world and probably shipped from one foster home to another. Silently, I wondered if that had been his fate. I shouldn’t even care.
“I’m sorry I’m acting like such a dick. What do you want from me?” I had no idea how to handle this situation. I wasn’t good at heart to hearts.
“I want a brother.” He eyed me warily. My heart contracted at hearing those words. It wasn’t his fault we shared a shitty father.
“Do you want to come in?” I asked, and he smiled.
An hour later, we were still sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and shooting the shit. The few photos I had of my dad were lying scattered between us on top of the kitchen table. I learned I had a nephew. He was two. In less than two weeks, my brother was marrying the love of his life. There was three years difference in our age. I was the oldest. If I had a vagina, I’d probably be sobbing right now. He’d taken out his wallet and had shown me a picture of his son whose eyes and chin was pure Lucas.
Miles had been raised in a single parent home by his mother, who had obviously been stupid enough to fall for my father’s charm. Miles didn’t know where our father was. He hadn’t seen him in years and wasn’t interested in finding him either. I couldn’t agree with him more. I had never met him. I didn’t give a shit about that bastard or my mom, wherever she may be. They could both rot in Hell for all I cared.
All of the sudden, there was the sound of tiny feet running down the hallway. Sierra burst into the kitchen still dressed in her nightgown with her hair a wild mess. Miles looked at me from across the table grinning. “Yours?” he asked, and I couldn’t help but smile. The kid was something else.
“I’m hungry,” she said, but before I could reply to his question, Sierra distracted me by climbing into my lap. “Who’s he?” she asked.
My gaze met Miles across the table. He wore what appeared to be a hopeful expression. It was the same one he’d been wearing when he had arrived.
Shit!
“He’s my brother,” I finally said, and he smiled, grinning from ear to ear.
“And who is this little lady?” he asked.
“This is Sierra,” I replied, noting his curious gaze. “She my girlfriend’s daughter.” The lie slipped easily from my lips. It beat having to explain to him the mess that Miley was in.
“It’s nice to meet you, Sierra.”
Suddenly, a tiny hand grabbed my chin, and I glanced down at Sierra. She seemed happy. Her sky blue eyes were practically beaming. “Are you going to be my daddy?” she asked, and a painful longing squeezed my heart. I wasn’t anyone’s daddy, nor would I ever be.
At that moment, Miley chose to walk into the kitchen. She still looked half asleep, and was also wearing her nightgown. She issued an ear splitting screech upon noticing we had company. Her cheeks turned red. “I didn’t know anyone was here,” she said, self-consciously tugging at the hem of her nightgown. I didn’t mind it in the least, but I could tell she was embarrassed. She was wide awake now, and turning a darker shade of red by the second.
Miles automatically stood, and I motioned for her to come forward. She’d crossed one arm over her chest and again pulled at the short length of the fabric covering her thighs. It was impossible to miss that Miley wasn’t wearing a bra. I glanced at my brother, but his expression was nothing but pleasant. I’d hate to punch him in the face after having just met him. Like a gentleman, he held out his hand.