Authors: György Dragomán
I
WAS DOING
my homework and Mother was correcting papers, ever since not being allowed to teach she spent a lot more time doing this, the ladies she used to work with would give her papers in secret, papers to correct, because they knew there was no way we could make ends meet from the money Mother got for cleaning, so that's how they wanted to help her out.
Anyway, I really wanted to finish my homework already, and that's because I couldn't wait to get some of that chestnut roll Mother made specially for me for my birthday, she had a really tough time getting the cream and the chestnuts for it, but then we made the chestnut purée together by cutting the boiled chestnuts in half and scraping the meat out using small spoons, yes, chestnut roll was my favorite dessert, the last time we had one was back when Father was still at home, before they took him away to the Danube Canal, chestnut roll was also his favorite dessert, and this was the first time since then that we managed to get chestnuts at all, and I knew that as soon as I finished my homework we'd take that chestnut roll out of the fridge and put the candles on it and celebrate my birthday together, so I really wanted to be done with my homework already, and then all of a sudden the doorbell rang.
Mother winced, of course, because ever since the time our flat was searched she got scared whenever the bell rang, and it's not like we were expecting anyone either, and no one ever really visited us, even the neighbors dropped by more at night to ask for something or bring something, but just about never did anyone ever come by like this in the afternoon, so it's no wonder I now saw Mother turn pale. I told her to wait, I'd go see who it was, and if I didn't recognize the people I wouldn't let them in, I went out to the hall and looked out through the peephole but didn't see anyone, the stairwell was empty, so I figured it must only be the guys fooling around even though I told them not to do that sort of thing with our doorbell, and I was just about to go in and tell Mother there was no one there when the bell rang one more time, and I looked out again, and again I didn't see anything, so I reached to open the door, but only because I wanted to see if anyone had taped the doorbell down, and then the door swung open.
Standing there right in front of me was this kid, he couldn't have been more than six years old, which was why I hadn't seen him before, he must have just barely reached the bell, and he was in school clothes, except that his school jacket was at least six sizes too big for him, it reached down almost to his knees and its sleeves were cut off around where the elbows originally were, and this kid was loaded with clothes hangers and wooden knives and wooden spoons, he had at least a hundred hangers on him and rolling pins too, and a whole string of clothespins was tied around his waist, a whole lot of them, at least five hundred, I swear. Anyway, as soon as he saw me he asked if my mom was home, but I told him to get lost, we weren't buying anything, but he said that he didn't ask if I wanted to buy something but if my mom was home, and I told him to beat it because if he didn't, I'd kick him right down the stairs, but first I'd stuff at least a couple of those hangers down his throat, but not even that seemed to scare him, no, he just pressed the doorbell again and then Mother called out from the inside room, "Who is it?" and I shouted back, "No one," but then that little shrimp took to shouting that he had dirt-cheap hangers and that the good lady of the house really should come take a look because she'd never seen such high-quality wood in her life, and then I gave the kid a shove, but he didn't fall over, he just stepped back and grabbed the railing, and I said, "Scram, hit the road," but by then Mother was there, she looked at me and her lips stiffened as she said, "Go straight to your room," but of course I didn't go all the way, I went only as far as the back hallway and watched from there to see what would happen.
Mother asked the little runt what his name was and how old he was, and he said, "Mariusz, six and a half," and then she was already asking him how many brothers and sisters he had, and the kid said seven, and Mother said, "All right," and she told him to come on in and not to stand out there in the cold even though it wasn't cold in the stairwell at all, and then this Mariusz wiped his feet and meanwhile all that wood rattled on him so loud it was like he wasn't even alone, and he came into the entranceway and stopped and took the whole kit and caboodle off his shoulders, it was all fixed to a harnesslike strap, he set it all down on the rug and began telling Mother about how his father splits the wood and dries it in their attic, and how he and his brothers and sisters carve the hangers and the clothespins, and how it's almost impossible these days to find such first-class craftsmanship. He spoke just like an adult, he did, without stopping once, sometimes taking out a hanger and sometimes a clothespin and holding it up for Mother to see, like he really was proud of them, and my mother didn't say a thing, no, she just looked on, and when the kid finally shut his trap, all she asked him was who had taught him to talk so cleverly, and the kid looked at her and said his father had, and then Mother asked him if his other brothers and sisters did the same thing, and Mariusz said yes, they were going around to the other apartment blocks around here and that they'd be staying in our town for a week before moving on, and that they'd be getting home only for Christmas, after traipsing over half the country. And then Mother asked him if he didn't even go to school, and Mariusz said no, he didn't, and his brothers and sisters didn't either, and then Mother asked if that meant he couldn't read either, and Mariusz smiled and shook his head, but he said right away that he sure could count, though, and especially add, and when the time came to figure the price of the hangers, then she, the good lady of the house, would see for herself that he'd tell her the right price in no time, and then he asked her right away how many hangers she wanted to buy and how many clothespins, and he would have started telling her all over again what good-quality wood they used, but then all of a sudden my mother asked Mariusz if he was hungry, and of course he said, "You bet," and then Mother took him by the shoulder and told him to come out with her to the kitchen, and then I got really scared because I thought right away about the chestnut roll, about what would happen now.
Not wanting Mother to yell at me, I was really careful sneaking out to the kitchen, and by the time I got there Mariusz had already eaten half a thick slice of bread spread with lard, and then Mother got a mug and took the milk bottle from the fridge and filled the mug for him, and the kid took the mug right away in both his hands and drank the milk with really loud slurps, and then he put down the mug and wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his jacket, and when Mother reopened the fridge to put the milk bottle back in, that's right when Mâriusz looked straight at the chestnut roll there on the shelf inside, and he even pointed at it with one of his hands and asked, "What's that?" but then I couldn't stand it anymore, I just had to say something, so I said, "It's nothing, don't go bothering about it," but as soon as I said that I knew right away I shouldn't have because Mother looked at me and smiled that stern, cold smile of hers, and she said, "Son, it looks like you have a guest, now that's a real celebration for you," and then she opened the fridge back up and took out the chestnut roll and put it out on the table, and she told me to go get two plates and two small spoons.
Her voice was so firm I didn't dare raise a fuss, instead I only went to get the plates and the spoons and I put one of each in front of the kid and one in front of my place and then I sat down, and Mother stuck a candle in the top of the chestnut roll, where the number twelve was written in chocolate, and she lit the candle and said, "There really should be twelve of them, but now one will have to do," and then I blew out the candle and made a wish, I wished my father would finally come home or that we'd at least get some news about him, and then Mother cut the chestnut roll, and she gave the first slice to Mâriusz and the second one to me, and Mâriusz dug in right away without saying a thing to me first, so just for that I didn't wish him a good appetite either, and I took the spoon into my hand, but I didn't start eating yet, instead I looked at that slice of chestnut roll there on my plate for a little bit, at the white whipped cream in the middle of the chestnut purée, and I think I thought of Father, and then I ate a spoonful, and it was just as delicious as I remembered, if not even more so, it was sweet and soft, and only when I then took the second spoonful into my mouth did I look at Mâriusz's plate and see that he was already on his last mouthful, and then he looked up at Mother and said he'd never eaten anything
as good in his whole life, never ever, and he asked if he could have one more slice, and I really felt like saying, "Hell no, you can't," and telling Mother that it was a waste letting him stuff even that first one into his trap, but she was already cutting him another slice, and then I too started eating faster, I didn't slow down to savor the sugary chestnut purée anymore, instead I just kept stuffing one spoonful after another into my mouth, but all the while I was looking at Mâriusz, he was spooning the stuff as fast as it would fit in him, he cut such big bites out of the slices that he had to hold each heap with his thumb to keep it from falling off his spoon, and his chin was smeared with whipped cream and chestnut purée, and when he finished it he looked again at Mother, and Mother cut him one more slice, and meanwhile I got my second slice, and hardly any of the chestnut roll was left anymore on the china plate, the only part left was where the numbers were, and Mâriusz was still eating just as fast as at first, he was leaning really far over his plate, and he had the elbow of his free arm on the table, half covering the plate, but Mother didn't tell him to sit properly, though she would definitely have told me, and when that third slice of his disappeared too, Mâriusz then poked his spoon at the china plate and said she should go ahead and give him that last little bit, "Let's not let it go to waste," he said, and I could tell Mother wasn't happy about taking up the knife again, but then she cut that last piece in two all the same, and she gave one half to him and the other half to me, and when it came time for me to begin eating my half, all of a sudden I felt I couldn't eat any more, but by then Mâriusz had long finished his half, and I saw that his eyes were on my plate, so just for that I ate one more spoonful, I couldn't even taste the chestnut purée anymore, only the sweet flavor of rum, but I kept eating it anyway even though I could hardly swallow it anymore, Mâriusz was staring so hard that I did swallow it after all, and I even spooned out every last bit of whipped cream from my plate and licked it off my spoon, and when I finally put down my spoon, my belly felt all queasy, but I forced out a smile all the same, and then Mariusz looked at me and said, "Happy birthday and many returns," and he looked at Mother and thanked her for serving him so well, and he said that now she should tell him if she'd buy any hangers or not because he had to get going, he'd hardly sold a thing yet all day, and then Mother said all right, she'd buy five hangers and ten clothespins but only if Mariusz gave them at a low price, and then they started haggling, Mother loved haggling, and I thought that maybe she'd done the whole thing just so she could haggle, ever since we'd had to sell some of Father's clothes we had enough empty hangers, after all.
By then my belly was really churning, and I felt like the whole chestnut roll was about to come right up at any moment along with the boiled potatoes I'd had for lunch, so I stood up and went out to the bathroom and clenched my teeth, I wasn't about to puke if could help it, so I stopped by the faucet and let the cold water run and then I splashed some of it on the back of my neck because I learned in school that doing that stops nausea. I even drank a little water out of my hands, and luckily that took care of my queasiness in no time, and when I went back into the kitchen, Mother was already done haggling and Mariusz was just putting the harness full of hangers back on his shoulders, and when he saw me he said that as long as it was my birthday, why then, I had a gift coming to me, and he took a wooden knife off one of the strings tied to the harness and put it in my hand, and he told me to use it in good health, but all I did was nod, I didn't want to thank him, plus I was afraid of getting queasy all over again, and then I opened the door for him to go and closed it after him too.
We could hear him clattering up a storm as he went down the stairs, and Mother looked at me and said I should be glad I didn't know what being hungry meant, and then she went back to the living room and those papers, and I hurried into my room and stood up on my bed and opened the window and just caught sight of Mariusz as he turned out onto the sidewalk from the path to our building, and I gripped that wooden knife tight and took a deep breath, but then I didn't try throwing it at his head after all, because I knew I wouldn't hit him, that he was already too far away.
T
HE ONLY REASON
I headed off toward the grocery store was because I found this huge wheel nut and two big bolts on the dirt road leading to the construction site, and I wanted to stuff the nut with match heads because I remembered Zsolt saying that if you then screw on the bolts from both ends and tie a shredded plastic bag to one of the bolts, like feathers on an arrow, and then toss the thing out the fifth-floor window, those gigantic tractor-wheel nuts explode like the devil and blow a hole even in the pavement, and so I wanted to buy some matches, at least four or five bundles with a dozen packs in each, but the pastry shop where I used to buy them wouldn't sell me anything ever since Szabi and I put a smoke bomb under the glass display case and they had to throw out all the pastries because every one of them smelled like burnt plastic, thanks to the tractor-tire shavings and shredded Ping-Pong balls we mixed into the bomb, and because of that I had to go to the grocery store when I wanted to buy matches, but at least there I could buy as many as I
wanted at one time, and that's because I knew one of the stock ladies, Miss Ani was her name, but everyone called her Fat Ani because she was as big as a pig, like a house even, not that I ever called her that, no, she was Mother's friend, one time she even stayed with us for two days when her alcoholic husband chased her out onto the street, and ever since then she'd been really grateful to Mother, and whenever I asked, she always brought me unopened bundles of matches and acetone for smoke bombs, sometimes as many as four or five bottles a time, and she never even asked what I needed the stuff for, no, all she asked was if my mother was doing okay, so it really was worth it walking all the way to the grocery store, even though it was pretty far.