The Wolf of Harrow Hall (Tales of the Latter Kingdoms Book 7) (18 page)

The steward clearly realized the same thing, for his eyes narrowed, and his mouth compressed before he said, “So you heard that? I will admit that I thought I detected some odd sounds from the corridor while his lordship and I were conducting that conversation. Those sounds were you eavesdropping.”

“I — I did not mean to,” I said quickly. “I had thought I would surprise Phelan by coming to see him, and then I heard the two of you speaking. What you said so engaged my curiosity that I could not find it in me to walk away, even though I knew it was wrong.”

“Well, then.” Master Merryk tapped his fingers on the tabletop, clearly debating what he should say next. Then I saw his shoulders lift, as if to indicate that we had already gone too far for him to worry about any further revelations. “I fear I have not told you the whole of it. Despite sending the female servants away, his lordship was not entirely safe. He had been betrothed from a very young age to one of the daughters of Lord Olivax, of Blackmore Keep. There was no way to break the engagement without raising Lord Olivax’s ire, as well as arousing far too much suspicion. Besides, his lordship believed that as long as he isolated himself from his new bride at the appointed time, then no harm would come to her.”

A sick feeling began to grow in the pit of my stomach. Perhaps it was only the
cherbeg
asserting itself, but I feared the anxious roiling in my belly had very little to do with the liquor I had drunk. Certainly there was no sign anywhere in Harrow Hall of the young woman who had been Phelan’s affianced bride, not even a portrait in the gallery.

“What happened?” I whispered.

The steward did not look away from me, as some men might have. Voice steady, he said, “She came to us with her servants accompanying her. The wedding was not to take place for several days, as her father had unexpected business arise that required his presence on his own lands. But because he did not wish to violate any of the strictures of the betrothal, he sent his daughter ahead. Pretty girl.” A shake of the head before Master Merryk went on, “She was quite enamored of his lordship, and although of course I was not there to see all that passed between them, it was not difficult to guess what happened. Lord Greymount thought he was safe because the full moon was still several weeks off, and Lady Sharenne had no idea of the danger she was in. So they…shared some kind of intimacy…and his lordship changed.”

“He — ” I had to stop myself there. I could imagine well enough what might have happened next, and I did not want to think of it, did not want to believe that Phelan was capable of such a thing. But could he even be said to be Phelan Greymount, lord of Harrow Hall, when that dreadful change came upon him?

“Yes,” Master Merryk said grimly. “I will not go into any detail as to what precisely occurred, my lady, for that is not something you need to hear. We sent word to her father that there had been a dreadful accident, that the Lady Sharenne had fallen down the stairs and broken her neck. Because she had been his lordship’s betrothed, with their marriage due to occur within only a few days, no one thought it terribly strange that we buried her here in the family graveyard. It was high summer, a time when a hasty burial would be necessary. Her family was upset, as you might imagine, but his lordship returned her dowry, which did a good deal to mollify her father.”

“He did not care that his daughter was dead?” I demanded, unaccountably angered by the steward’s description of Lord Olivax’s behavior.

“Most likely he was glad to have the dowry returned to him. Lady Sharenne was one of six daughters, and her father had a most difficult time getting them all suitable matches.”

I decided it was best to leave that particular matter aside. “So that was why his lordship was so startled that he did not…react…to me.”

“Precisely. And that is why he decided you must be the one who could rid him of this terrible curse. Whatever it was that made you different, it was something to keep hold of.”

“And so he made me his wife.”

“Yes.”

Although I had overheard Phelan saying how he thought me beautiful, that he desired me, I still could not help harboring the suspicion that he had married me because he thought I was his only hope of salvation, and not because he truly loved me.

“You doubt,” the steward said. “That is understandable, but it is not the truth. His lordship does care for you a great deal, which is why he was cast into despair when the full moon began to approach and he began to feel its effects, despite your presence. He could not understand why he could be with you as a man is with a woman, and yet still have the wolf-change come upon him.”

I could not understand it, either, but then again, there was a great deal about this situation that I did not understand. It seemed as if there was some piece of the puzzle still missing, something I should have guessed at by now.

The conversation I had overheard tumbled through my mind, and I began to pick at it, trying to discover something I had overlooked. They had spoken of my birth, and the mystery of my father….

My father. Of course. I knew nothing of him, except it must have been from him that I got my soot-colored locks, so much darker than my mother’s. Eyes dark, too, which seemed amiss if he had been one of the
corraghar,
but perhaps the eye color did not always breed true.

“Phelan said my father must have been one of
them,
” I said. “Meaning one of the
corraghel,
I take it?”

“That was his suspicion, my lady. And his hope.”

“But I have never turned into a wolf.”

“Because you are a woman. It is only the men who have that ability.”

“Which they can utilize at will.”

“Yes, my lady.”

My thoughts raced after one another, tumbling. I knew nothing of this father of mine, or why he had lain with my mother, save that she was a great beauty, and perhaps even a man of the
corraghel
had not been able to resist her charms. Putting the mystery of their relationship aside, I thought it seemed clear enough that the
corraghel
were not tormented by their shape-shifter natures. Why?

Because they have their women to help them stay in control.
The thought which surfaced in my mind was so clear-cut that I did not bother to deny it. It made perfect sense. I had been unaware of the blood I carried within me. Phelan had sensed it — hence the spark that had flared between us — but neither of us had had any idea of what to do with it.

But now I did.

Abruptly, I rose to my feet, even as Master Merryk stared up at me in surprise. “When Phelan turns, where does he go?” I asked.

The puzzlement on the steward’s features gave way to alarm as he began to divine what I might have in mind. “Out on the moors. I have heard him howling more times than I wish to recall. But you cannot possibly be thinking of going out there — ”

“I must,” I broke in. “I have to reach out to him now, to show him that I understand what I have to do.”

“My lady, he will kill you!”

Those words, spoken so baldly, hung in the air between us. I supposed there was that possibility, that I truly had no idea what I was doing, and so was blindly rushing into danger. But I had to try.

“I would rather die than live without him.”

A long silence, and then Master Merryk pushed himself up from his seat. Voice heavy with a mixture of resignation and dread, he said, “Then let me show you.”

I
had not wished
to waste the time it would require to fetch my mantle from my chamber, and so Master Merryk lent me one of his, along with a heavy knitted scarf and a pair of fur-lined leather gloves that were much too big. My borrowed cloak was likewise too large, and dragged along the ground, but it was warm, and that was good enough for me.

Now we stood at a small door which opened directly from the outer wall. I thought it might lead to the midden where all the castle’s waste was dumped, for even in the bitter cold I thought I could smell faint traces of decay, and the way had been carefully shoveled, unlike most of the other entrances to the building. No matter. It was the quickest way outside, and one that would not be noted by any other of the castle’s denizens.

Even now, the steward attempted to dissuade me from following what he obviously thought was a mad course of action. “My lady, I beg you — do not do this. We can wait out the moon, and after tonight, his lordship will be himself again.”

“Until the next full moon,” I said. My voice shook despite my efforts to control it. I had seen what the wolves did to our poor goat Sissi, so I knew exactly what my fate would be if I could not somehow persuade my husband to come back to himself. But I also knew we could not have any sort of life with his terrible half-wolf existence always hanging over us. “Do you not see, Master Merryk? I must try to end this, or nothing will ever change.”

His shoulders slumped, and I could see defeat clearly in the lines of his face. In one hand he held a lantern, which he extended to me. I took it from him, seeing in that small gesture capitulation.

Then his chin went up, and he said, “If you overheard my conversation with his lordship, then you also heard me call you a peasant. Now I know that is not a true. You are a very great lady, Bettany Greymount, with a far nobler spirit than many who were born to a title.”

Those words moved me greatly, for I knew Master Merryk would not have said such a thing if he did not truly believe it. “I thank you for that, Master Merryk. And I thank you also for your service to his lordship, for I do not believe his own father could have looked after him as well as you have.”

Even in the dim light of the lantern, I could see a flush spread on the steward’s high cheekbones. He opened his mouth to speak, but in that same moment, a wolf’s howl came to us from over the snow-driven moors, chilling me to my bones. I could not entirely blame the icy wind for the cold coursing through me.

“I must go,” I said. “Thank you again, Master Merryk.”

“May the gods go with you, Lady Greymount.”

I could hope for nothing more than that. Turning, I held the oversized cloak shut with one hand, while the one that held the lantern peeked out just enough to illuminate the ground a few feet in every direction. Not that there was so very much to see, for any landmarks had been completely buried after so many days of driving snow. It still fell now, stinging against my face, but I could not allow that to deter me.

A howl sounded once again, this time from somewhere to my left. I set off in that direction, the lantern showing just enough of the ground to keep me from stumbling. Once again I was glad of my sturdy boots. Even so, the cold had already begun to seep up through the soles of my feet.

In that moment, I could not help but wonder what would kill me first, the wolf, or the unending cold.

Neither,
I told myself fiercely.
You will find Phelan, and you will call on the
corraghar
blood within you to calm his wolfish soul.

I could only hope it would be that simple. For of course I had no clear idea of what I was doing, had driven myself out here on the power of a hunch and not much else.

Was it my imagination, or was the snow falling less thickly? Difficult to say, for I held the lantern rather low, thinking it was better that I see where I was walking, rather than worry about what the skies above me were doing.

A few flakes drifted down, and then all went still. Even the icy wind, which had done a very good job of slipping past the heavy scarf wound at my throat, dropped to a whisper and then nothing at all.

Overhead, the clouds parted, and a huge white moon drifted into the blackness the clouds had left behind. The pure silvery light poured down, glittering against the snow. In awe, I looked up, drinking in the moonlight. In that moment, I almost forgot why I had come here.

But I did not forget for very long. From somewhere behind me came a low, harsh growl, and I whirled, barely needing the lantern to see the baleful golden eyes glaring up at me, the smoky darkness of the creature’s pelt against the snow-covered ground.

No, not a creature. Phelan.

“My love,” I said. My voice shook, and the wolf growled again. Very slowly, I stooped down so I could set the lantern on the ground. Then I spread my hands. “I know you can hear me, Phelan. Come back to me. You need not allow this thing to control you. Let me help you.”

The wolf snarled, lip curling to reveal a set of very sharp, very white teeth. I swallowed.

And then, before I could even take another breath, he sprang. Without thinking, I raised my arms, blocking him so he could not reach my throat. But the weight of him knocked me sprawling onto the snow, my head hitting the ground with a hard
thump
. Flashes of red swirled before my eyes, and I blinked. I could not faint now, for then he would surely kill me.

His furry snout was mere inches away from my face. A drop of saliva hit my cheek, but I could not reach up to wipe it away. This was too horribly like my dream, when the wolves set upon me and savaged my throat. I feared, however, that no one would wake me to allow me to escape from this nightmare.

“Phelan, please,” I whispered. “I know you are in there somewhere, listening to me. This is not you. It is part of you, just as it is part of me, but it is not
all
of you.”

The wolf went very still. His weight on me was growing increasingly painful, but I knew I dared not shift even a fraction of an inch. The golden eyes bored into mine, and yet, I thought I saw a flicker of something there, something which was not a wolf.

Or was I only trying to fool myself into believing there might still be some hope for him?

“This is why we were meant to be with one another,” I went on, ignoring the icy dampness of the cloak on which I lay, the bruising weight of the wild animal that held me pinned to the ground. “You recognized that wildness in me, knew it was the one thing you needed, even if you did not know precisely why. I am not telling you to deny the wolf, for it is beautiful in its own way. But you must be its master, just as you are Linsi and Doxen’s master. Do you see?”

The wolf growled again. I could smell the stink of its breath, see the bloodshot rims around the golden eyes. There was nothing of my husband in those eyes. This had all been a fool’s errand. He would kill me, just as the wolf had killed me in my dream. And I would be buried in the snow and no one would ever know where my body lay.

Because I did not know what else to do, I breathed out a single word, just as I had in my dream.

“
Please…
.”

A long, long moment passed. I dared not look away from the wolf’s golden eyes, even though it hurt not to blink, hurt to keep staring up at him. And then I watched as that gold began to dim, turned dark, even as the darkness of his fur grew pale, seemed to alter and lengthen, and became the body of the man I loved.

Phelan Greymount lay there naked in the snow. I let out a sound that was half laugh, half sob, and pulled him to me before pushing us both up from the snowy ground. He looked at me in confusion, his teeth already beginning to chatter.

“What — ” he began, and I shook my head.

“You are yourself again, my love. But we must get you back inside.” I unbuttoned the cloak I wore and began to pull it from my shoulders.

“No, Bettany, you cannot — ”

“I am fully clothed, and have on stout boots and a scarf. We are not so far from the castle that I should suffer much harm by doing without for a few minutes. Please, my love. Take it.”

A pause, and then he reluctantly slung the cloak around his shoulders, even as I bent and lifted the lantern. He looked from me to the bright orb of the moon overhead, his features a study in wonder and confusion. “But — ”

“It no longer has any power over you, Phelan. But please come.”

His eyes were filled with questions, but it seemed he had come back to himself enough to understand that we must get inside as quickly as possible. The going was slightly easier, now that the snow no longer fell. Even so, I feared that his feet would be badly frostbitten by the time we reached shelter. I could do nothing about that, however, except hurry him along, glad of the moon lighting our way. Only a few minutes passed before I could see the bulk of Harrow Hall rising before us, the warm candlelight in its windows serving as beacons to guide us home.

And then there was the small door in the outer wall opening, a rectangle of golden warmth that spurred us to hurry those last few yards. Master Merryk waited for us there, shock clear on his features.

But he was not so shocked that he had not prepared for our return, even if he hadn’t believed I would succeed. He guided Phelan down the corridor that led to his own rooms, where the fire burned hotter than ever, and a basin of warm water was waiting to bring the life back to his master’s poor battered feet.

“Drink this, my lord,” Master Merryk said, handing Phelan a cup of
cherbeg
. Yes, that should be just the thing. Its fire would bring some much-needed heat to my husband’s chilled body.

With a shaking hand, Phelan took the cup from his steward, then downed its contents. “More,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.

Master Merryk fetched more, and again my husband drank. I looked on anxiously, worried that I might not have gotten Phelan into the shelter of the castle before he suffered permanent damage.

But then he handed his steward the empty cup and glanced over at me. I could see no spark of gold in his eyes, although his gaze was warm enough as his eyes met mine. Improbably, his mouth lifted in a smile.

“The storm is over, is it not?” he asked.

“Yes,” I said, relief flooding through me. “Yes, I believe it is.”

T
ruly
, the snow had gone. We woke to blue skies and sunshine. I sensed that Phelan had not yet recovered enough to be with me as a husband might be with his wife, but it was enough to hold one another, for me to feel the amazing human beauty of his body pressed against mine. And it was joy uncounted to have him whisper, his face buried in my hair, “You have saved me, Bettany. You have brought me back to myself, and so to you.”

Perhaps I could be forgiven for weeping after he told me that.

But although the storm had finally dissipated, there was still much work to be done. Phelan set his men to shoveling out the courtyard, and clearing the area directly in front of the castle’s main gates.

“Not that I expect anyone to come visiting any time soon,” he commented as we stood in one of the upstairs galleries and watched the men-at-arms throwing great shovelfuls of snow to either side. “But we should at least make the attempt to have it seem as if all is normal here.”

“I will need to go visit my grandmother as soon as I can,” I said. Yes, I was beyond happy that my husband had been restored to me, and yet I had left connections and responsibilities behind me in Kerolton. I could not neglect them now simply because Phelan’s condition was no longer a concern.

“Of course, my love,” he replied. “I know that. And as soon as I deem it safe, we will both go. I would like to meet this grandmother of yours so I might thank her for raising such a redoubtable granddaughter.”

“Oh, so I am redoubtable, am I?” I returned, looping my arm through his.

“You know you are, my remarkable, wonderful Bettany. You refused to give up, even though I had long ago.”

“I would say that was more me being stubborn,” I said, then went up on my tiptoes so I might kiss him on the cheek. “Or perhaps ignorant. You had been fighting against your fate for many years, whereas it was all very new to me. I did not know better.”

“Then thank the gods for your ignorance, if that is what you wish to call it. Because without you — ”

He broke off there, dark eyes haunted, and I immediately put my arms around his waist so I could hold him close. “But the gods did send me to you, Phelan,” I said. “I will admit that I have not had much use for them prior to this, but I can think of no other reason why I would have come here.”

A corner of his mouth lifted, and I was glad to see some portion of his usual insouciance return to his manner. “I thought you came here to beg me to pay your taxes.”

“To allow me extra time to pay my taxes,” I said, my tone mock-severe. “I most certainly did not ask you to pay them for me.”

“Ah, I suppose that is the truth of it. I know you have a difficult time asking for anything from anyone. A handout is certainly not something you would willingly ask of anyone.”

“I would think not,” I replied with some indignation. “I would never have expected such a thing.”

“Of course you would not,” Phelan said with a smile. “But I will pay those taxes, since you are now my wife, and it is my duty. And my pleasure,” he added, then bent down and kissed me.

I had not even thought of that. But because he was my husband, my obligations were now his as well.

I could only hope they would all be so easy to discharge.

I
t was nearly
a ten-day after the Great Storm — as everyone had taken to calling it — had passed before both Master Merryk and my husband agreed that the weather seemed calm and clear enough to risk the journey to Kerolton. During that time, my moon-courses had come and gone, telling me I was not yet with child…and also reassuring both Phelan and myself that he could be around me while I was in such a state and not succumb to his wolf nature. This greatly reassured the two of us. As for the other matter, well, I wished very much to have his child, but I did not mind waiting just a little while. It was good for the two of us to know one another as husband and wife before we also must be acquainted with each other as parents.