He stopped, smiling down now on Benjamin and Mary Ann. He stepped forward, moving closer to the altar where they knelt. “And now, Benjamin, if you will take Mary Ann by the right hand, we shall proceed.”
As they walked slowly back home, their feet crunching in the snow, their breath trailing in clouds around them, the stars hung above them in the immense blackness, so close as to be touchable, and yet so vastly far away as to fill the soul with thoughts of eternity.
As they reached Steed Row, they all stopped in front of Benjamin and Mary Ann’s gate. The air was still now and the night filled with silence. It was as though the whole city were hushed by the sacredness of what had transpired that night. Finally Benjamin looked around at his family. He reached out and took Mary Ann’s hand. “This has been a wonderful evening,” he said softly, not wanting to disturb the silence. “Now each of us as couples have been joined together through eternal and sacred covenants. Remember the Lord’s own words. ‘I am bound when ye do what I say, but if ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.’
“We received marvelous promises today, promises that very few in the history of the world have been privileged to receive. Now it is up to us to keep the covenants we have made. If we do, by his own word, the Lord is bound to honor his word.”
There were grave nods and soft murmurs of assent. Each couple stood close together, either holding hands or having an arm around the other’s waist or shoulder.
“Today we were sealed together as husbands and wives. Soon we shall have our families sealed to us as well. Think about that. If there is one thing I have learned in my years of fumbling through life, it is this. When it comes down to it, all that really matters both here and in the world to come is our family. Let us go into the wilderness.” He waved his hand, taking in the houses along Steed Row. “Let us leave all this. Even if we don’t get a dime for it. What does that matter? I think of your children. Will and Alice, filled with enough faith to follow a prophet’s voice. Emily and Rachel, now women in their own right.” He smiled. “Savannah, who as you all know is the apple of her grandfather’s eye.” He turned to Derek and Rebecca. “I think of Christopher and little Benjamin and your sweet, sweet little Leah.” He looked at the others. “There’s not time to name them all. But you know how you feel about them, and you know how we feel about them. They are all that really matter.”
Now they were all nodding.
“Do you know what I was thinking as we finished tonight?”
They watched him quietly, waiting for him to answer his own question.
“I remembered that day several weeks ago when your mother and I got off the boat. How terribly disappointed we were as we looked at the faces in the crowd and saw no one we knew! Think of that. Think of entering the spirit world and having no one there.
“And then I picture going around the side of the Nauvoo House and seeing all of those grandchildren standing there waiting for us.” His voice caught and he had to look away. When he spoke again, it was with difficulty. “I think of all of you stepping out to greet us.” His body started to shake a little as he fought to hold back his emotions.
Several were wiping at their eyes now, and there were more than just a few sniffles to be heard.
“The Lord has promised us a fulness of joy if we are faithful,” he finally went on. He stepped nearer to Mary Ann and pulled her close to him. “Well, if that’s the case, he’s going to have to give me a lot bigger bottle to hold it in than I have now, because I can’t imagine being happier or more joyful than I was at that moment. And if there’s more joy than that to be found, I will just simply burst.”
They laughed with him through their tears, all of them deeply touched.
Benjamin straightened, his face calm and serene. “We must continue to pray for Carl and Melissa and Joshua and Caroline so that they someday will be with us. And other than that, it doesn’t matter what happens now. We have obtained the blessings that the Lord has designed for us. We shall seal our children to us and become one great, eternal family. And then no one can take it from us and we can go from here in peace.”
“Amen!” Nathan said in a near whisper.
“Amen!” murmured the others.
Chapter Notes
While on a trip to the outlying settlements, Joseph Smith pronounced the doctrine of the new and everlasting covenant of marriage in Ramus. This eventually became section 131 of the Doctrine and Covenants (see
HC
5:391–93). Though Joseph Smith had sealed a few couples for time and eternity before his death—Brigham and Mary Ann Young, Heber and Vilate Kimball, Parley and Mary Ann Pratt, and a few others—the ordinance of sealing couples together for time and eternity, revealed in what is now sections 131 and 132 of the Doctrine and Covenants, was not administered to the general membership until 7 January 1846 (see
HC
7:565–66).
The description of the altar comes from the official history of the Church (see
HC
7:566).
Chapter 29
Brethren!”
Those assembled in the largest room of the upper floor of the temple stopped their quiet whisperings and turned to face Brigham Young.
“Thank you for coming. If our count is right we have all but one or two of the captains of companies here. We also have several captains of tens and other leaders with us. We appreciate your coming. We know that you are busy and that every minute away from your workshops is time away from your preparations, so we shall keep this meeting short.”
He looked tired. Two days before, Heber Kimball had told Nathan that with the time growing shorter and with the huge numbers of Saints who wished to have their temple ordinances, Brigham had been working day and night in the temple. Heber said that he had been home only once in the past week and was averaging no more than four hours of sleep each night.
“We regretfully inform you that the news from our friends in high places is not good. They say that the federal troops in St. Louis are ready to march on us at any time. We know not how much longer we can stay safely in our city.”
He stopped, letting the soft cries of alarm play out, his fingers drumming softly on the small table he was using as a podium. “A few days ago, we called for a report from the captains as to who in their respective companies were ready to leave immediately. We learned that we now have about a hundred and forty horses or other draft animals and seventy wagons. That is terribly disheartening in a way. We estimate that we are going to have to eventually move close to fifteen thousand Saints, so this is a pittance. And time is running out.”
He squared his shoulders, looking at the men through narrowed eyes. “We are now certain that we can no longer delay our departure, certainly not until there is grass on the plains. If evil descends upon us, our only safety will be in our departure from this place. So I am asking, How many of you captains are ready and willing to start immediately?”
Heads turned as men looked at each other in dismay. “How soon is immediately, President?” someone called out.
“Two weeks, maybe less.”
That brought a rumble of surprise. Men gaped at each other. Some just shook their heads. Nathan Steed turned and looked at his father. Two weeks! Today was the eighteenth of January. Two weeks meant about the first of February, two and a half months sooner than they had been planning.
“I’m not talking about having every single nail and piece of rope you’re going to need. I’m talking about who is close enough in their preparations to leave immediately if the call comes. Let me see by raise of hands.”
Benjamin gave Nathan a long appraising look, and then, not waiting for an answer, raised his hand.
“There’s no way we can be ready that soon,” Derek said, reflecting the discouragement they all felt at hearing the news Nathan and Benjamin had brought back from the temple. “We only have three wagons thus far and still need more oxen to pull them.”
“We have two more yoke now,” Matthew said, raising his hand.
Nathan nodded at him. “What do you mean, Matthew?”
“We sold the cabinet shop today.”
“You what?” Nathan cried. The others were equally shocked and began to pepper him with questions.
He waited patiently until the voices in the room died away into silence again. Nathan noted that Jenny’s head was down and her hands were twisting at the edge of her apron. “A gentleman from Peoria offered us two yoke of oxen and a pepperbox pistol with fifty rounds of ammunition.”
“And that’s all?” Lydia exclaimed. “For the whole shop?”
Jenny’s head came up. “Tools, lumber, unfinished furniture. Everything.”
Matthew’s face was impassive, but one could sense the deep struggle to hide his pain. “I knew we needed the animals. What good is a wagon without something to pull it? I made him agree to wait until we’re gone before he takes possession.”
Now they were all staring at their hands. Derek spoke without looking up. “Does Carl know?” And then he answered his own question. “Of course Carl doesn’t know. Carl is in Wisconsin with Joshua.”
“I talked with Carl before he left,” Matthew explained. “He wishes desperately that he could buy it, but there’s no way he can. Not now.”
Benjamin had to fight the urge to sit down, such was the weariness that hit him at that moment. Nathan and Lydia were giving the store to Joshua and Caroline, since they owned part interest in it anyway, so that was settled. But nothing else in Nauvoo was taken care of. Solomon’s land in Ramus was sold, but for a mere two hundred dollars—about a tenth of what it was worth. The man had sent seventy-five dollars as a down payment, and so far had sent nothing more. Solomon had talked about going to Ramus to see about it, but there likely would not be time now.
“Brigham asked something else of us,” Nathan said quietly.
“What?”
“He’s appointed a committee of five. He wants us to turn any unsold properties over to them as we leave, and give them power of attorney to sell it for whatever they can get. They will then use that money to help others who have little or nothing.”
“Better than just giving it away,” Derek murmured.
“That’s what Nathan and I thought too,” Benjamin said. “We signed the papers.”
Peter and Kathryn had been sitting quietly in the corner. Now Peter stood up slowly. A little surprised, everyone turned. Kathryn’s eyes were glistening as she looked up at him.
“Peter?” Benjamin said. “Do you have something you’d like to say?”
“Yes, I do.” There was no mistaking the air of gloom that hung upon him. “Kathryn and I have a suggestion on how to solve one of your problems.”
“What?” Derek said, taken aback by this sudden boldness of his younger brother.
Peter fumbled in his trouser pockets for a moment, then withdrew a small piece of paper. It was a half sheet of foolscap, folded in half again. “This advertisement will appear in the
Sangamo Journal
in a few weeks. That’s a Springfield newspaper. I was sent a copy after sending off inquiries to one of the members of the Church there.”
He lifted it, turning it toward the lamplight, and began to read in a clear, flat voice devoid of all emotions. “‘Westward, Ho! For Oregon and California!’” He looked up. “That will be the headline.” Down his eyes went again. “‘Who wants to go to California without costing them anything? As many as eight young men, of good character, who can drive an ox team, will be accommodated by gentlemen who will leave this vicinity about the first of April. Come, boys! You can have as much land as you want without costing you anything. The government of California gives large tracts of land to persons who have to move there. The first suitable persons who apply, will be engaged.’”
He folded the paper calmly and returned it to his pocket. Only then did he look up into their astonished faces.
“Are you saying . . . ?” Nathan started, but he was so completely dumbfounded that he didn’t finish.
“I’m saying that this is a partial solution to a family problem. We are short of wagons and have no more money to buy them. We need additional teams to pull them. You will be lucky to find transportation for each of you and your families. Kathryn and I could—”
“California?” Mary Ann interrupted him. “You would go to California?”
“No, Mother Steed. We’d go only as far as we have to, then we’d drop off and join up with you.”
“You’re serious about this?” Derek asked, still not believing what he was hearing.
“Yes!” Peter said forcefully. “Of all the family, Kathryn and I will be the most difficult to care for. And not just because of Kathryn either. We have no skills, very little money, no way to really contribute.”
“It says you have to be able to drive an ox team,” Matthew broke in. “Have you ever driven an ox team, Peter?”
He flushed, but didn’t back down. “I would like one of you to teach me.”
Jenny was staring at her sister in horror. “Do you agree with this?” she asked.
Kathryn nodded, biting at her lower lip. “Not happily, but it’s a way we will not be a burden.” She took a quick breath. “And if we have to leave earlier than planned, as Brigham says we will, it will be one less thing for all of you to worry about.”
“You can’t!” Rebecca cried. “You can’t go alone without us. We’ll just make do.”
“Tell them the rest, Peter,” Kathryn said.
“These people that I know in Springfield have been making some discreet inquiries. These are wealthy farmers and businessmen. One of the families, by the name of Reed, has several children. They are very well-to-do. The mother is talking about hiring a tutor for her children.”
Now several conversations erupted at once. Peter watched sadly as the family reacted to his startling proposal. Nathan finally held up his hands and the noise died away again. He appeared grim as he looked around the room. “I know that what we have just heard sounds awful, but . . .”
“No!” Lydia cried. “There are no buts, Nathan. Peter and Kathryn have to go with us.”
He wanted to reach out and hold her, stroke her hair, tell her it was all going to be okay. But he couldn’t. The realities were too gloomy.