“Yes,” Kathryn said slowly. That was the third time he had used the word
burden,
and now she thought she knew where this might be leading. Her chin lowered and she stared at her legs. “I don’t want to be a burden either.”
He jumped a little, then was instantly contrite. “Kathryn, it’s not you I’m worried about.”
She gaped at him. “Then who?”
“Me!”
“You! How would you be a burden?”
“Well, first of all, I have nothing. No money, virtually no job now, no wagons, no food. Unfortunately, Kathryn McIntire Ingalls, you married the absolute poorest member of this family. I was hoping that I could do things for Joshua and Carl, help pay for their assistance.” He shook his head. “But now that neither of them has money, I don’t know quite what to do.”
Her eyes were soft and misty, touched by his honesty about himself, and more touched that he hadn’t thought of her when he was thinking of burdens.
“And that’s only part of it,” he went on. “Oh, I know the family will help us. We won’t be left, but think about this. We will have six families going, seven if Joshua and Caroline decide to accompany us by some miracle.”
“Yes?”
“The ideal number for a wagon is a family of four or five. More is a real challenge.”
“So?”
“Think about it. Mother and Father Steed will likely go with someone, most probably Matthew and Jenny, since they have only two children.”
She started to interrupt, but he held up a finger and went on quickly. “Derek and Rebecca make a family of five. Nathan and Lydia have seven, so they’ll be more than full. And Jessica and Solomon have eight.”
Now she saw clearly why he was troubled. “That doesn’t leave much room for us, does it?”
“No,” he responded. “Derek says we’ll go with them, or just get another wagon. But you know we’ll be lucky to have five wagons. And that’s not to say anything about food and a hundred other items.”
The euphoria she had felt a few minutes before had totally evaporated.
Peter went on in deep dejection. “And if that’s not bad enough, there’s one other thing. I’m going to be the least helpful person on the trail. I can’t make anything. I’ve never driven a team.” He held out his hands, staring at them. They were soft and stained with ink. “I’m a printer. Don’t suppose there’ll be much use for that on the road west.”
“That’s not true,” she exclaimed. “You’re not useless. Look at all you’re doing now. Keeping a record of everything. Making sure everything is accounted for. Everyone knows you are valuable to the family.”
“I don’t deny that. But once we cross the river, how much bookkeeping will there be? We’ll be eating our inventory, not recording it. Who’s going to need to keep track of how much money we do or don’t have then?”
She waited, hurting for him, wanting to reach out and smooth away the lines around his mouth. “So what are you suggesting?” And then, remembering that he had started this conversation with mention of Sister Levinah Murphy, her eyes grew wide. “You’re not thinking of us going separately!”
“Just hear me out, Kathryn. It’s just an idea.”
“I’m listening,” she said, looking suddenly very dubious.
“A few weeks ago, I saw an article in one of the Springfield papers. It reported that there are some wealthy farming families around the capital who are talking of going to California and Oregon in the spring. They’re having weekly study meetings, reading all the books and looking at the maps, so they’ll be better prepared. One of the men they interviewed said that once the weather breaks, they’ll be looking for others to go with them, especially young men they could hire to help along the trail. He said they’ll be looking for tutors for the children, drovers, teamsters.”
“Not go with the family?” she said in a small voice. It completely overwhelmed her. “Besides, as I understand it, we’re not going to either Oregon or California, Peter. I thought Brother Brigham said we’re going to the Rocky Mountains.”
“I know, I know. But most of the way it’s the same trail. I’m not saying this is what we’re going to do, Kathryn, but think about it for a minute. Suppose we could hire on as tutors. We both helped Jessica when she had the school here. That’s one thing I can do. Then we’d have a way, we’d not have to worry about having our own outfit. We . . .” He stopped, overwhelming himself with the breadth of his thinking. “We could go with them as far as Fort Laramie, or something like that, then wait for our group to come.”
“They’ll not want a cripple with them any more than our family will.”
He gave her a sharply critical look. “My worry is convincing them to hire
me,
” he said. “But we could teach the children, Kathryn. Then neither one of us would be a burden to them. I know it’s slim, but maybe there’s a chance it would work.”
She didn’t have the heart to discourage him, so she finally nodded. “I think you’re right, Peter. I think it is something to think about.”
His face lit up. “I think so too. Maybe it will never happen, but it is something to think about.”
Chapter Notes
On 30 November 1845 the Twelve met with other priesthood leaders and dedicated the attic story of the temple in preparation for its being used for the administration of the endowment (see
HC
7:534–35). At this time the Saints worked busily to provide the temple’s attic story with plants, mirrors, paintings, and other furniture (see
Women of Nauvoo,
pp. 150–51). On 7 December 1845, the cotton veil that the sisters sewed for use in the endowment was hung in the attic story.
Chapter 27
The tenth of December, 1845, dawned dazzling bright. As the day wore on it became pleasantly warm, at least ten degrees warmer than the blustery cold of the day before. The snow from a previous storm was gone, and had it not been for the bareness of the trees and the brown grass, it might have passed for an early spring day. It was a fitting day to begin the administration of the endowment to the general membership of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.
With hundreds upon hundreds of Saints anxiously awaiting their turn to participate in the ordinance, the Twelve were faced with the decision of where to begin. In May of 1842, Joseph Smith had introduced a small group of men to the endowment. So now, until they could share the ordinance with more men and women in the temple, there were only a limited number to help in giving it to others. That limited the numbers of who could receive it at first and raised the question of who should be first. Finally, it was determined that they would start with those of the Twelve who had not received it under Joseph’s hand, their wives, and a few of the other General Authorities and their wives.
The work began at 3:00 p.m. on the afternoon of December tenth. It would take twelve and a half hours before the thirty people—fifteen men and fifteen women—were finished. Two widowed sisters were also present at that first session—a singular and yet well-deserved honor. Agnes Smith, wife of Don Carlos Smith, Joseph’s beloved younger brother, was there. She was accompanied by her sister-in-law Mary Fielding Smith, wife of the martyred Hyrum Smith.
As a member of the temple committee, Benjamin and his wife, Mary Ann, had been invited by President Young to be there as well on that first night. Benjamin had been there on that day in 1842 when Joseph first introduced the endowment, but Mary Ann had not. Sorely tempted to be part of this historic occasion, they finally opted to wait for a few days so that the rest of the adult members of the Steed family could all receive their endowments at the same time.
At about three-thirty a.m. on the morning of the eleventh of December, a very tired but jubilant Brigham Young and Heber C. Kimball left the temple with their wives. They went to the Joseph Kingsbury home, just a short distance from the temple, rested for a few hours, had breakfast together, then returned to the temple and started the second group.
This day more leaders and their wives came—the seven Presidents of the First Council of Seventy, presidents of the priesthood quorums, members of the high council. Fifteen more people—seven males and eight females—were endowed on that day. Among them were two additional widows from Joseph Smith’s family. Lucy Mack Smith, beloved mother of the Prophet and revered Saint in her own right, was there. She was accompanied by Mercy Fielding Thompson Smith, plural wife to Hyrum after her husband, Robert Thompson, had died, and sister to Mary Fielding Smith.
In later life, Brigham Young would observe how some Saints said, “We never began to build a temple without the bells of hell beginning to ring.” That lesson was reaffirmed in December 1845, for on the very day the long-awaited giving of the endowment began, Brigham received a letter from Samuel Brannan in New York City. It was filled with much news of his progress in chartering a ship to go to California. It also contained news that showed that Satan’s opposition had flared up once again.
Brigham was standing outside the main door to the temple talking with several people. The moment he spied the Steeds coming up the walkway, he excused himself and strode over to greet them. “There you are!” he boomed pleasantly. “How good to see you all here!”
He moved from couple to couple, shaking hands and speaking briefly with each one—Matthew and Jenny, Peter and Kathryn, Derek and Rebecca, Solomon and Jessica, Nathan and Lydia, and finally, Benjamin and Mary Ann. Caroline had been invited to come, but decided under the circumstances—Joshua was still under a dark cloud following his return to Nauvoo—that it was best that she wait.
Brigham turned to Mary Ann. “I received a letter from New York a few days ago.”
She brightened instantly. “From Will and Alice?”
“No, from Samuel Brannan. But he scribbled a quick note at the bottom of his letter saying that our young couple had just arrived that afternoon. It was dated the twenty-eighth of last month.”
“Oh, good. Caroline will be so relieved.”
“So how are the preparations for their voyage coming?” Nathan inquired.
“Good. They have chartered a ship, the
Brooklyn
by name, and plan to leave in mid-January. They are enrolling the Saints in the East now. However,” he said, his face darkening, “there is news that is not so good.”
“What is that?” Benjamin asked.
“Well, two things. The first didn’t come from Sam Brannan, but it’s news from Springfield. Have you heard about the indictment handed down by the United States circuit court there?”
Benjamin harrumphed in total disgust. “Yes, Brother Pratt told me about that yesterday. Eight members of the Twelve were indicted for bogus-making.”
“What?” Nathan cried. “I haven’t heard about this. Counterfeiting? Surely that’s some kind of a joke.”
“I wish it were,” Brigham said grimly. “Unfortunately, we have had trouble with counterfeiters in this area, transient river traffickers who have preyed on our people. Now someone has sworn we are in league with them and supporting their evil efforts.”
“And there’s more bad news besides that?” Solomon inquired.
Brigham’s countenance fell even further. “Yes, and far more serious. Brother Brannan was down in Washington recently, visiting the Saints there. He learned that the secretary of war and other members of the cabinet are laying plans against us.”
“No!” several of them cried at once, alarm sharpening their voices.
“They claim it is against the law for an armed body of men to leave the United States and go to some other government. Since Upper California belongs to Mexico, and ownership of Oregon is still being disputed between the United States and Great Britain, they plan to prevent us from leaving.”
“How can they do that?” Lydia cried. “It’s the people here who are driving us out. We don’t want to go.”
“You assume we are dealing with just and rational men,” Brigham answered somberly. “According to Brannan, they say it will not do to have us go, but neither can they let us stay within the United States.”
“So what do we do, hang from the sky somewhere?” Jenny asked tartly.
“Actually, according to what Brannan was told, they are saying we must be obliterated from the face of the earth.”
A pall fell over the group and they looked at each other in grave concern. Brigham laid a hand on Benjamin’s arm. “Brother Ben, I’d like you and Nathan to come to a meeting in a day or two. We are praying that the Lord will stay their hand and allow us to finish our work here. We shall go out, in spite of what they say. It is God’s will that we do. But now . . .” He sighed heavily. “With these two new developments, we may not have the luxury of waiting until April or May.”
“You mean you want to leave before then?” Nathan exclaimed. “But there won’t be any grass on the prairie yet. We—”
“I know, I know,” Brigham soothed. “That’s why we need to meet. I’ll send word to you.”
They nodded. After a moment, Brigham smiled and it was warm and full again. “But enough gloom for now. This is a glorious day. We’ve been working day and night. It’s only been five days and we’ve already given the ordinances of the endowment to almost two hundred people.”
Matthew, who of all the family knew Brigham best, nodded thoughtfully. “You look tired, Brother Brigham.”
“Tired!” he retorted with impatience. “Who’s got time to be tired?” He turned to the women. “In fact, dear sisters, we have a request to make of you.”
“What is that?” Mary Ann asked for all of them.
“We had planned to take Saturday off so we could wash the temple clothing. However, it means we will lose that day for ordinance work. We are going to ask the sisters to take the clothing home and wash them during the night.”
“We would be delighted to do that,” Jessica spoke up.
“Yes, of course,” exclaimed Rebecca and Lydia together.
“It would mean staying up most of the night,” Brigham warned.
“Like you and the others have been doing?” Mary Ann scoffed, brushing his warning aside. “You count on the five of us for sure.”
He reached out and gave her a quick hug. “Oh, bless you. Bless you all! Now, let’s go inside. A glorious experience awaits you.”
Peter started to lift a hand, but Brigham was ahead of him. “Kathryn, we’ll have Peter wheel you inside to the stairs. Then we’ll ask Matthew and Nathan to carry your chair up while Peter carries you. Once you’re up in the attic story, you will be able to move around as required.”