Tough Love (7 page)

‘Fuck me,
Reservoir Dogs
.' Markie smiled at them.

Gaz passed him a sandwich. ‘Eat up and shut up. You got a wedding to go to.'

‘Don't I know it.'

*

Kia stood in the middle of Tracy's lounge wearing a baby pink dress with a pink flower pinned into her curly blonde hair.

‘Give Nana a twirl,' Tracy said, standing in the doorway dragging on a Benson & Hedges. Kia twirled, and her grandmother let out a raucous laugh. ‘Aw, you're a little sweetheart.'

Leanne beamed with pride. She loved it when Tracy showed some interest in Kia. It didn't happen often.

‘Do I look all right, Mum?” she asked. She had decided to wear a knee-length turquoise dress. She didn't want to draw attention to herself and she thought her outfit was just right.

‘You'll do.” Tracy stubbed out her cigarette.

Leanne's heart sank. Why did she always do it to herself, she wondered. Tracy's approval of anything other than her own actions was hard won and Leanne had always found that, of all her siblings, she was the one least likely to receive it. Tracy said that as Leanne's mother she had to keep her daughter's feet on the ground. ‘You've got people kissing your arse all day long. I'm your mum and I'm here to tell you straight.' Leanne didn't need her backside kissing, but a bit of a hug from her mum now and again might be nice.

‘I think you look really pretty, Mummy,' Kia said.

Tracy sparked up the hob and lit another cigarette, then reached down to the oven door and opened it. Strange, thought Leanne. Tracy never went near the oven unless she had some crispy pancakes in it. The microwave was her kitchen
appliance of choice … Then Leanne saw, with horror, that her mum wasn't about to cook anything. She had pulled out a baking tray on which lay a dozen or so racked-up lines of coke.

‘Fancy some baking powder?' Tracy asked, with a smile.

‘Kia, go and get Mummy's bag from upstairs, will you?' Leanne asked, trying to keep calm. Tracy took the tray out of the oven and began to roll up a ten-pound note that was lying on a work surface. She bent forward and hoovered up a line like the old pro she was. Leanne dropped her voice: ‘I thought you'd knocked that shit on the head.'

Tracy threw back her head and sniffed hard. ‘Special occasions. And what's a more special occasion than my baby boy getting married?'

‘Put it away. I don't want Kia to see you doing that.' Leanne glared at her.

‘Bloody hell. Anyone'd think you were pure as the driven snow.'

Leanne could hardly believe it – but Tracy never failed to surpass herself. ‘The only reason I ever took that stuff was because you gave it me!'

Tracy flicked a hand dismissively. ‘Oh, boo-hoo! Loads of kids would love a mum who was cool about doing drugs.'

‘Cool?' Leanne could feel herself losing it. ‘You call coming in from school and having to take heroin cool?'

‘Oh, come on, I wasn't into the scag for long.'

‘Long enough to make me take it with you when I was only fifteen.'

‘No one forced you.'

Leanne had had enough. ‘No? I come in. You're off your head. You tell me you need someone to talk to and the only way you'll feel right about talking is if I'm on your “wavelength”. So I chase the dragon to have a conversation with my own mother. What bit of that is you not forcing me?'

Tracy raised an eyebrow and Leanne turned. Kia was standing by the door holding her handbag.

‘Why are you shouting?' the little girl asked.

Leanne smiled and replied, through gritted teeth, ‘We're not shouting, sweetheart, Mummy and Nana always talk like this. It's just a game.'

Tracy put her baking tray back into the oven with a knowing snigger.

Leanne straightened Kia's dress. What a start to the day, she thought. She felt physically sick. Her mum had always dipped in and out of drug-taking and Leanne knew the signs that showed a bender was in the offing. Tracy would use a special occasion as an excuse to tuck into the coke. Leanne had seen her in some real messes and couldn't face another, not at Markie's wedding with everyone there.

‘Now then?' Kent stuck his Elvis-inspired head round the door. Leanne felt relieved. She hoped he
could pull her mother into line. ‘How's my darlin'?' He went over to Tracy, who put her arms round him and kissed him on the lips. Leanne cringed but not as much as she did a moment later when their tongues got involved. Tracy snaked her hand down to Kent's belt and Kent tried to pull back, although he was obviously enjoying it.

‘Eurgh!' Kia said, clapping her hands over her eyes.

‘Eurgh's right!' Leanne said, and grabbed her daughter's hand. ‘I know it's your house, Mum, but can you do that in private?'

Outside, Leanne started her car, wondering what on earth she'd done to deserve her mother.

*

Jodie, Chanese, Karina and the other seven bridesmaids were trying to get Mandy and her Lady Di-influenced wedding dress into the carriage she had booked. It was proving easier said than done.

‘Couldn't you have got a longer train?' Jodie said, her vow of silence forgotten.

‘I don't need you getting all lippy today, Jode. Just help me into this fucking thing,' Mandy snapped.

Mandy's poor father, Keith, who was neither use nor ornament, was sitting in the orb-like carriage clutching at his daughter's back as if that might
help. ‘Dad, will you give it a rest? You're doing my head in!' Keith sat back, chastised, and Jodie gave him a small smile. Poor bugger, she thought.

Once Mandy was in, the carriage set off for Hanley Farm. Jodie and Karina breathed a sigh of relief. ‘D'you think she'll chill out once we get to the reception?' Karina asked.

‘God knows.' Jodie watched the horse-drawn vehicle pull round the corner.

‘Here.' Karina rummaged in the little pink flower bag that each bridesmaid had. ‘Take this.' She passed Jodie a wrap of coke.

Jodie took it so as not to arouse suspicion and hid it in her own bag. ‘You know I don't take drugs,' she said.

Karina giggled. ‘By the end of today you'll be jacking up heroin if she keeps on like that.'

Jodie smiled reluctantly. What the hell have we got ourselves into? she wondered.

Leanne was sitting in a row with Kia, Scott and Charly. She didn't mind Charly. Tracy always said of her, ‘I know her type.' Well, Leanne knew her type too: she'd met a thousand of them in London, hard-faced girls who wanted a way out of their humdrum lives, but that didn't make them bad. Charly just needed a foot up in life, and Leanne hoped that Scott was enough for her. Somehow she couldn't be sure that he was. She'd done all right, Charly, as far as Leanne could see. And she could have been a lot worse: she was a Metcalfe, and the Metcalfes made the Cromptons look like the Waltons.

The grand entrance hall of Hanley Farm had been turned into a chapel for the afternoon, with twenty rows of benches on either side, pink roses adorning the ends. It was beginning to fill up. Leanne didn't recognise many people but they all seemed to know who she was. A few of the men had done the not-so-sly double-take she was used
to. She sometimes felt like wearing a badge that read,
Yes, I am who you think I am.
It seemed that Mandy had invited all of Bradington. Leanne really hoped that everything went to plan. Mandy had been so on edge about everything that she knew the tiniest wrinkle would ruin her day. But her future sister-in-law's nerves weren't just pre-wedding jitters. Mandy had lost a lot of weight lately. She had always been slim, but now she was a size six and shrinking. Before Leanne had moved back to Bradington, she had confided one night when she was drunk and in confessional mode that she had been taking slimming powder, lots of it.

‘Speed?' Leanne had asked, appalled.

‘God, Leanne, you're such a bloody goody-goody sometimes.'

‘I'm not – I just don't want you to wreck your insides.'

‘I'd sell my insides on frigging eBay if it meant I'd get into Vicky Beckham's size zeros,' Mandy had admitted. Well, she wasn't that far off a size zero now, Leanne had thought when she saw Mandy yesterday. She didn't have the heart to tell her she looked ill and, besides, Mandy was so jumpy with the amount of amphetamine she was shoving down her neck that Leanne couldn't be sure she wouldn't swing for her.

She glanced round and saw Markie come in at the back of the hall. He caught her eye and
winked. She beamed at him. She'd never thought she'd see the day when Mandy finally got Markie down the aisle. At that moment, Mandy's mum, Rita, turned round and breathed an obvious sigh of relief that the bridegroom had shown up. She adjusted her rather too large duck-egg-blue hat and returned her eyes to the front of the hall.

Behind Markie came Paul and Scott. Leanne needed to talk to her dad. He hadn't spoken to her in months. She'd argued with him earlier this year, telling him he was making a rod for his own back by constantly pursuing Tracy, but he hadn't listened. In fact, he'd put the phone down on her, then refused to take her calls. She wished he'd get on with his life.

Tracy was sitting at the front with Kent. When she saw her ex-husband she made a big show of dusting some non-existence speck off Kent's shoulder, then kissed his cheek. As Paul took his seat, Leanne felt the atmosphere chill. Tracy cleared her throat and looked straight ahead. Everyone knew that Paul wasn't allowed near her but for their son's sake they were putting aside their differences for the day. Leanne knew this was a generous gesture on both their parts, considering their history. She wondered how well they'd fare when her mum's coke really kicked in and her dad had a few Stellas inside him. For now, though, they were doing their best impressions of civilised human beings.

Four men filed to the front of the hall to take their places alongside Markie. Leanne felt herself flush. She smiled down at Kia to distract herself, then looked up again and caught the eye of the person responsible for the change in her colour – Tony O'Brien. Tony and Markie had been friends since they were children but, more importantly, Tony had been Leanne's first love. Tony gave her a half-smile, and Leanne sent him a little wave before returning her gaze to her feet, annoyed that she felt embarrassed.

Tony was seven years older than her, and when he had first taken the fifteen-year-old Leanne out, he had sworn her to secrecy. They both knew that if Markie found out he'd go mad. ‘He'll have my bollocks,' Tony told Leanne, and she'd laughed until she realised he was serious. Leanne and Tony had been an item for two years before she moved to London, and no one had ever known. Plenty of people half-suspected but she and Tony had kept it hidden. By the time she was old enough to tell anyone she felt they had left it too long. She was sure that her relationship with him had taught her how to keep a secret.

The benches filled up quickly and Markie was standing at the front now, staring ahead. He looked nervous, Leanne thought. Sandra Davidson, an old neighbour, was taking her seat on the bench in front of Leanne and turned to hug her. ‘Awright,
sweet'eart,' she said, in her sixty-a-day voice. ‘You're lookin' beautiful as ever.'

‘Thanks, Sandra,' Leanne murmured.

‘You still down south?'

‘No.' Leanne shook her head, ashamed. ‘I'm back here.'

‘Oh, good.' Sandra smiled and squeezed her hand. She was about the tenth person since Leanne had arrived back in Bradington to react positively. What Leanne saw as monumental failure, others saw as her return to where she belonged. It was as if her family and friends had known she'd be back and thought little of it. She just wished someone could have told her sooner and saved her all the heartache of trying to set up home in London.

A hush fell over the congregation and the harpist began to pluck at her instrument. Then Celine Dion started to sing ‘My Heart Will Go On'. Of course, Leanne thought. Everyone turned round to see Mandy, followed by her twenty-foot train and ten bridesmaids, enter the hall. As much as this sort of over-the-topness wasn't really Leanne's bag, she thought Mandy looked stunning. She wished Markie would turn to look at his bride – that was what Mandy wanted – but he was staring at the registrar as if he was petrified. When Mandy and Keith, her dad, reached the front, Markie gave her an awkward smile. Mandy was crying, and her
mum, Rita, was flapping her hands in front of her face as if she was trying to stave off tears.

The registrar began the ceremony and everyone settled in. Leanne was watching her father like a hawk. He kept staring at Tracy but whenever Tracy caught his eye he quickly faced forward.

The vows came and went without a hitch, and no one had stood up when the registrar asked, ‘Does anyone know of any reason why these two should not be joined in matrimony?' which was a blessed relief. Leanne had had money on one of Markie's joker mates jumping to his feet.

As the ceremony came to a close, the registrar took a step back and looked at the newly weds. ‘You may now kiss the bride,' he said.

Markie moved forward to Mandy, who took her new husband's face in her hands and kissed him passionately. When her tongue went into action Leanne had to look away. ‘Eurgh!' Kia said, for the second time that day.

Leanne put a finger to her lips to shush her but, really, she agreed with her wholeheartedly. Apparently Markie's mates shared their opinion, doing the silent shoulder shake that indicated they were laughing. Markie pulled back, mortified, and looked at Mandy as if to ask, What was that about? Mandy grinned manically. She was wired. Leanne winced. This had the makings of a very long day.

*

Tracy came out of the toilet cubicle. She had just been to powder her nose again. The door opened and Karina walked in, her puffball dress barely fitting through the door.

‘The bloody Sugar Plum Fairy! What do you look like?' Tracy cackled.