“Really?” Dr. Steve gave her a skeptical look. “You’re not just saying that are you, tricky girl? I remember you saying that broken arm didn’t hurt much either.”
Dar had to smile at the memory, bittersweet though it was. “I’m not,” she replied. “I’ve really been trying to be good.”
He nodded. “All-rightie, then.” Gentle hands lifted and turned her face to the light as he peered at her intently. “Hmm, interesting.”
“What?” Dar queried, a touch nervously.
“Nothing, I just love looking at those baby blues,” Dr. Steve answered mischievously as his patient rolled her eyes. “Seriously, Dar, you do look more relaxed.” He patted her shoulder. “Glad to hear about the headaches.
We’ll just check your blood, see how you’re doing. I want to look at your white cell count. That was very low last time.”
Something else occurred to her. “While you’re there…I’ve been running into some…I don’t know, I guess I’ve been forgetting things lately,” Dar muttered. “And I’ve been having trouble concentrating. It’s starting to bug me a little.”
“Mmm?” Now her doctor’s face was serious. “All right, I’ll check to see if there’s anything strange in your blood work, but it probably won’t show up there. You having dizzy spells, or problems with your vision?” He put on his stethoscope and listened to her chest. “Ticker sounds all right.”
“No, well, not dizzy, exactly.” Dar struggled to explain. “Just, I’ll be doing something, and I’ll just go blank, like my attention gets distracted,” she said. “I walked out last night and left my cell phone in the condo. Last time I did that… Hell, I don’t remember the last time I did that.”
“Hmm.” Dr. Steve pressed against her shoulder. “Lie down.”
Dar did, letting her eyes close and feeling the pressure cuff tighten against her bicep. Her mind drifted, thinking of the coming day. Or to be more precise, the coming night, and she found herself thinking of Kerry, and those warm, green eyes, and…
“Dar?”
She opened her eyes, to see the doctor regarding her in puzzled concern.
“Damn, sorry.” She sighed. “See what I mean?”
Dr. Steve leaned against the table, a lock of gray hair dropping down over his forehead. “I don’t understand. Your pressure is fine; your heart sounds fine. Maybe I should schedule you for a CT scan,” he suggested warily.
Dar rubbed her eyes. “Maybe,” she muttered.
“You saying that without arguing means your pretty head’s probably about to pop off.” He shook his head. “Well, let me go run a quick scan on the blood and see if I see anything. Go wait in my office. I think I have the new
PC
World
in there.”
“Oh, great,” Dar grumbled. “Just what I need—to read all about the new bugs.” She hopped off the table, though, and made her way to Dr. Steve’s comfortable office, slouching in an armchair and picking up the indicated magazine. “Where’s the cartoon? At least I can laugh at that.”
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295
“HEY! KERRY!”
KERRY turned, her fingers sliding on the strap of her briefcase as she spotted Mark Polenti catching up to her. “Hi. Morning.”
Mark’s eyes fastened on Kerry’s face for an instant, then he looked aside again without comment. “Listen.” He looked around quickly and asked, “You know where the boss is?” His voice was low and urgent.
Kerry paused in momentary indecision. “Um…”
“They’ve been trying to call her all night, and she’s not picking up,” Mark said. “We dropped the ball on the payroll transfer last night and we needed her sign off on a workaround.”
Oh. Damn.
“Why didn’t you call me?” Kerry asked. “Maybe her cell’s down.”
Mark sidestepped the question. “I was kinda worried. I called the condo.”
Kerry looked him in the eye. “She’s at a doctor’s appointment,” she said.
“So I guess we should go upstairs and clean up the mess before she gets here, shouldn’t we?”
Two women walked past them, giving them wary looks. Mark waited for them to pass before he answered. “Uh, yeah, sure.” His uncertainty showed on his face. “But you talked to her right? She’s okay?”
Kerry was torn between wanting to believe Mark was just honestly worried about Dar, and the knowledge that loose talk could seriously damage both of them. “I talked to her this morning,” she finally said. “She’s fine.”
Mark cocked his head a little. “So I guess her cell’s okay.”
Bleeping damn.
“She called me,” Kerry replied in an even tone. “I really don’t know where she was calling from, but it doesn’t matter. Let’s go take care of business.” She started toward the elevator. “You can ask her about it when she shows up, right?”
“Um. Sure.” Mark caught up to her and they walked together to the elevator. “Sorry they didn’t call you. I guess we’re not really used to having a Dar Junior.”
She was about to hit the button, but Kerry stopped and glanced at him as he looked uneasily back at her. “Flattery will get you nowhere,” she said after a long pause, swiping the control and walking through the sliding doors as they opened. She almost wished they would be joined by some of the anonymous secretarial staff in the lobby, but the elevator closed and they faced each other for the long ride up.
Mark stuck his hands in his pockets and leaned against the wall, whistling softly under his breath.
Dar Junior.
Kerry studied the inlaid tile on the floor of the elevator
. Dar
would probably laugh like a nut at that.
“Um.” Mark cleared his throat. “Hey, um…can I ask you something?”
Uh oh.
Kerry looked warily up at him. “Am I going to regret saying yes?”
“Maybe. Yeah.”
Kerry sighed. “Can I get some coffee first?”
DAR HAD READ through over half the magazine before she heard 296
Melissa Good
steady footsteps on the carpet and looked up as Dr. Steve ambled in, a folder under his arm and a peculiar look on his fact. “Finished?” She glanced at her watch. “I’ve got a million problems waiting for me at the office.”
The stocky, gray-haired man put the folder down and dropped into his seat, folding his hands over his belly and gazing at her. “Well, my friend, your stress indicators are down, that’s for sure.”
Dar let a small smile tug at her lips. “That’s good.”
He nodded. “Mmm. Yes, I was glad to see it. I also ran an analysis for hormones and other anomalies, and I think I might have figured out what your little forgetfulness problem is. Maybe or maybe not.”
Dar sat up and cocked her head. “Yeah?”
He nodded solemnly. “Yes, I’m afraid you have elevated levels of endorphins in your bloodstream, my friend, especially oxytocin.”
Dar was taken aback. “Oh.” She paused, a little alarmed. “What is that?
What causes it?”
Dr. Steve rubbed his nose. “Well, it’s a naturally occurring hormone.
Basically, it’s one of the things responsible for making us feel good. Your body releases it under certain circumstances, and it’s known to produce the symptoms you’re describing.”
Dar considered that. “What circumstances?”
“Mmm, in some cases, exercise. Especially long-distance running,” Dr.
Steve mentioned. “Do you do that?”
She shrugged. “Six, eight miles in a morning.”
“Did you do that this morning?” Dr. Steve asked.
Dar shook her head. “I…no.” She hesitated. “Not this morning.”
“Not that, then.” The doctor steepled his fingers. “You take any opiates?”
“What?” Dar’s brow contracted sharply. “Dr. Steve, you goddamn well know better.”
A hand raised. “Okay, okay, just asking.” A tiny grin chased itself around his lips. “That eliminates two of the three most common causes.”
“What’s the third, eating chocolate?” Dar chuckled.
“Falling in love,” Steve quietly replied. “Oxytocin is the hormone that stimulates the need for touching.”
Dar simply stared at him, her jaw sagging slightly, and her eyes blinking.
“That’s…ah, no, Steve, I don’t…” She ran a hand through her hair. “That’s not…”
“Dar, relax.” The doctor leaned forward. “Breathe, okay? I don’t want you keeling over in my office, it looks bad to the nurses.” He regarded her with fond affection. “My god, you’d think I just said you were pregnant or something. There’s nothing wrong with being in love, my friend.” He smiled.
“It’s good for you.”
“But I’m…” Dar tried to force the words out, but they just weren’t coming.
Jesus, this can’t be happening.
Her mind flashed back to her own words to Kerry, what seemed like forever ago.
It’s like your body knows.
“Are you…is that all, Dr. Steve?”
“Sure.” He gazed at her in quiet compassion. “Go take a walk, Dar. Get some air. You’re white as a sheet.”
Nodding absently, she walked out, not really sure where she was going
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297
until she was outside, where she mechanically found her car and opened the door, collapsing into the seat and leaning against the steering wheel. “He’s crazy. He doesn’t know what he’s…I’m not…”
She stared at the instrument panel, thinking about the past few days.
Thinking about how she felt. Thinking about how Kerry made her feel, and how just the impact of those green eyes on hers sent daggers of emotion stabbing through her. About how hugging Kerry made her happier than just about anything else ever had. About how she’d driven out in the middle of the night just to check on a little bump on the head and jeopardized a major account to keep from looking bad in front of her—setting aside the slowly creeping knowledge that for the first time in a long time she’d found something she cared about more than her job and her settled, predictable life.
Slowly, she leaned back, letting her arms fall to her thighs as the inescapable realization hit her.
Son of a bitch. I am in love.
A faint laugh forced its way out of her chest. Then she gripped the steering wheel and stared out through the tinted windows.
Now what do I do?
“OKAY, LOOK, IT’S only a bulletin board,” Kerry said, gazing patiently at the short, upset woman sitting across from her desk. “I know it’s something everyone likes, but the drive array went down, and they have to replace it.”
“But you don’t understand…we had important messages on there,” the woman stated in agitation.
Kerry cocked her head. “It’s a bulletin board. I thought it was for posting things for sale, company notices, that kind of thing.”
“No, no.” The woman looked frustrated. “It’s this…we’ve got all our social stuff on there, and Mary puts out these little poems, they really make everyone’s day. It’s like a community. We’re helpless without it. No one knows what’s going on!”
Kerry folded her hands together. “Helen, what exactly is it you want me to do?”
“Can’t it get fixed faster?”
“It’s a server drive array. They have to custom-order it from Hewlett Packard, and it has to be configured. They’re doing it as fast as they can, believe me,” Kerry explained. “That’s not the only thing affected. Printing and faxing services are down, too.” The server crash had been an unexpected, yet welcome emergency, putting off Mark’s questionable questions until some undefined later time.
Unfortunately, the workers had complained more about the downed bulletin board than if the mail servers had crashed. “We’re still trying to find out why it went down,” Kerry said. “That was a very strange failure.” She got an immediate guilty look from the woman, who stood hastily.
“Well, I hope they hurry. I have a lot of things on there that I need.” She gave Kerry a distinctly unfriendly glare. “I’m sure Ms. Roberts would have resolved it already.” She walked out, leaving a bemused-looking Kerry, who shook her head in mild disbelief.
“No, she would have told you to get your gardenia-smelling butt out of her office,” she informed the closed door wryly. Then she sighed and glanced 298
Melissa Good
at the clock. “Speaking of which, where in the hell is she?”
It was close to noon, and there was no sign of her boss. Kerry had set up a monitor that checked periodically for Dar’s login, and so far, the executive had been conspicuous by her absence. Kerry drummed her fingers on the desk, then picked up the phone and dialed. “Hi, Maria.”
“Hello,
Kerrisita
.”
“Any word from the boss?” Kerry tried to keep the concern out of her voice and make it only sound vaguely interested. “I have some documents I need to go over with her.”
Maria sighed. “No, honey. You and everyone else in the world is looking for her…and nothing. I tried her cell phone, the pager, nothing. I hope she is all right.”
Kerry felt a deep worry grab her guts. “Yeah, me too. That’s not like her,”
she murmured, as if she were an expert after all of less than a month.
“
Si, ay
. Wait, I hear her voice coming this way.” Maria sounded relieved.
“Okay, great. Thanks, Maria.” Kerry hung up with a mixed sensation of relief and anticipation. “No running down the hallway, Kerrison. Let her sit down first.” She decided to get herself a cup of tea instead, so she opened her drawer and took out a blackberry teabag, then grabbed her cup and headed for the door.
The kitchen was relatively quiet, and she smiled at the two other women inside as she put some Equal into her cup, then added boiling water from the dispenser over the teabag.
“Hey, Kerry.” One of the women sitting at a small table looked up. “I hear you signed up for the gym. You going tonight?”
The blonde woman nodded. “Yep. I sure did. I’m really looking forward to it. I put my name down for some light aerobics and that self defense class.”
She casually walked over, dipping her teabag in and leaning against the wall.
“Are you going?” The woman’s name, she recalled, was Candy, a uniquely inappropriate tag for the usually snippy administrative assistant.
Candy leaned back with a sigh and nodded. “Yeah.” She patted her thighs and made a face. “I thought I could get away with just some treadmill plodding at home, but I don’t do it enough, and it’s showing. I put on ten pounds in the last two months, and it’s either go to the goddamn gym or spring for new clothes.” She glanced at Kerry. “Self defense, huh? That’s pretty funny, coming from Dar Roberts’ assistant. And what the hell happened to your head?”