TROUBLE, A New Adult Romance Novel (The Rebel Series) (10 page)

The door opens somehow and pushes against me. There’s scrambling sounds and then Teagan’s head comes around the corner.
 
“You need to get up so we can open the door all the way without hurting you.”

I just push against it weakly, shaking my head.
 
I don’t have the strength to do anything else.

Her head disappears and a few seconds later another one comes through the door.

Blonde hair.

Green eyes.

Worry.

“Liss … you need to move so I can come in.”

I panic.
 
“Colin, God, go away!”
 
I wipe my face off, desperately hoping that I don’t have goop on my face that he can see.

“Not a chance.
 
Open up or I’m going to have to take the door off the hinges.”

Humiliation surges through me.
 
As if I’m not trouble enough for them, now they’re threatening to take the place apart.
 
I try to get my legs under me so I can stand.
 
It’s terribly awkward with my belly in the way, but with the help of the counter I’m gripping with all my strength and the door on my other side, I make it.

“I’m up.”
 
I put my foot in front of the door to keep it from opening up anymore.
 
“But don’t come in.”

“I need to.”

“No.
 
You
need
to go away.
 
I’m coming out.
 
Just give me a minute.”

He turns his head and looks at the shower.
 
Then he looks back at me, his earlier expression of concern now replaced by one of anger.
 
“Why are those pills over there?
 
Did you take any?”

“No,” I say, relieved to be telling the truth about that.
 
“I didn’t.
 
Just go.”
 
I push the door a little, not wanting to hurt him but needing to be alone.
 
It’s bad enough he’s seen this much of me.
 
I need to try and fix myself before I come out there and face the music.

As soon as his head withdraws and the door shuts, I start splashing water on my cheeks.
 
I scrub it off hard with the towel, trying to make the blotches all combine into one big, giant tomato-face.
 
It’s better than looking like I have a rash, which is what crying always does to me.

I try to ignore the reflection in the mirror in front of me, but it’s impossible. My face is swollen everywhere and my eyes are so red I look like I’m on drugs.
 
Oh, how far I have fallen.
 
I believe this is what they call
rock bottom
.
 
It’s very lonely down here.
 
And scary.
 
I’m so, so tired of being alone and afraid.

Taking a deep breath and letting it out, I attempt to push the stress out with the air.
 
It’s not working.
 
My heart feels like it’s in a knot, a lump of lead in my chest.

I drop the towel onto the counter and put my hand on the doorknob.
 
I hate to think the entire Rebel Wheels family is out there waiting for me, but I suppose it’s the least I deserve.
 
Time to face the music.
 
Time to be an adult.
 
Time to be a mother.

CHAPTER TEN

EVERYONE IS SITTING IN CHAIRS around the living room.
 
The couch has one seat left; I suppose it’s for me.
 
I go into the room as slowly as I can, dreading the conversation that’s about to take place.
 
My face is burning red with shame.
 
Even Rebel is there, staring at me.

I sit down and keep my eyes glued to the table.
 
Mick is next to me and Quin is on his other side.
 
Rebel and Teagan are across from me.
 
Colin is on my left.
 
No one says anything for a little while.

Teagan finally breaks the silence. “I’d offer you a muffin, but apparently my shit is inedible.”

I look up sharply, expecting a fight, but she’s smiling.

I bite my bottom lip, trying to keep the tears at bay.
 
She’s being way more generous than I deserve.

“Word, sister.
 
You needed to hear that about your concoctions.
 
Nowhere to go but up, now, right?” Quin high-fives Teagan before turning to look at me.
 
“Honesty is a good policy when it comes to roommates and friends.
 
Just, next time, maybe come at it a little more from the side instead of straight on.”

I nod, not trusting myself to speak.
 
I’m liable to start bawling at any second.

“We just want to help,” says Mick.
 
He turns his upper body to face me more.
 
“You get that right?
 
This isn’t supposed to be an intimidation thing.”

I nod.
 
“Yeah,” I say, my voice rough.
 
I glance up and look at Rebel’s expression.
 
His face is blank.
 
I can’t tell if he’s angry or disappointed or just completely neutral.
 
It intimidates the crud out of me.
 
Looking at Colin is just not an option right now.
 
I cannot handle him.
 
I don’t want to know what he thinks of me.
 
I’ve had enough pain and regret for one lifetime.

Teagan continues.
 
“We are completely cool with you staying with us.
 
For as long as you need.
 
Get your feet back under you and figure out what you’re going to do, whether it’s to keep the baby or give it up for adoption.”

“She’s not giving the baby up for adoption.”
 
Colin sounds angry.

“Whatever.
 
It’s her choice, not yours.”
 
Teagan’s voice goes softer.
 
“But whatever you decide to do, you have to let the father know about the baby.
 
That’s the only fair thing.”

My blood pressure goes up into the roof.
 
I can’t help but glare at her.
 
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Whoa, ease up there, cowgirl,” says Quin.
 
“She’s talking about the legal reality.
 
Regardless of how you feel about it, he has a right to know.”

I stand, unable to remain seated while listening to their well-intentioned baloney.
 
“Don’t talk to me about legal rights.” I practically spit the next words out.
 
“Legal rights, my backside.”
 
I stop myself before I go into a rant about people who don’t deserve to have the privilege of certain rights.
 
My newfound friends are already way too far up into my business as it is.
 
I am not going to share what they would need to know in order to agree with me, but that doesn’t mean I’m going to change my mind about it.
 
Charlie deserves nothing from me except maybe a two-by-four slammed up into his junk.

And yes, they are my friends.
 
I’m looking at all their faces staring back at me, even Rebel’s, and all I see is concern there.
 
It takes some of the fight out of me.

I swallow what little pride I have left and put everything I have into my apology. If it were just about me, I’d bail.
 
I’d tell them to kiss my grits and disappear into the horizon.
 
But it’s not for me.
 
It’s for my baby.
 
I have to do the right thing by her, even though it’s the hardest thing to do.

I clasp my hands tightly under my belly.
 
“I appreciate what you’re trying to do here.
 
All of you. Your support is awesome. And … needed.
 
So if it’s okay with you, I will go to the new house with you for a little while.
 
I’m going to work on finding something else, but in the meantime, it would be good to have a roof over my head and some food.
 
And I promise I’ll pay you back, every single cent.
 
I’ve been keeping track of everything.
 
As soon as I can get a job, I’ll start giving you part of my paycheck.
 
And I’m sorry for being rude before.” My face is burning.
 
This is so hard.
 
I just want to run away.

“This isn’t about the money,” says Teagan, sounding tired.

“For me, it is to some degree,” I explain.
 
“I don’t like owing people things, and you guys just stepped in and took over my life.
 
I appreciate it and I will pay you back.”

“No one’s taken over your life,” says Quin.
 
Her tone tells me she’s disgusted.
 
“You’re in charge of your life, even when you’re fucking it up.
 
At least have the decency to not give people who are helping you a hard time over it.”

I breathe in and out a couple times, trying to calm myself.
 
Reacting to her the way my first instinct wants to would be a mistake.
 
I know she means well, and I have been kind of rude.
 
“You’re right.
 
Absolutely.
 
I’m going to work on that.”
 
My face burns with unspoken retorts.
 
I just have to suck it up and take the abuse.
 
I need these people and so does my baby.
 
I’m going to do whatever I have to for my child.

For some reason, this thought makes my heart lighter.
 
It makes this whole event just a tiny bit less awful.
 
I’m still trying to figure out why when Quin starts talking again.

“Good.
 
Because seriously, we can be fun if you just let us be a part of your life.”

My smile is watery.
 
“I’m sure you can.
 
I’m just … too pregnant maybe to appreciate it right now.”

“I think you guys need to just stop being so fucking pushy with her,” says Colin.

I finally look at him, surprised to see his jaw muscle twitching like mad.

“Ease up, dude. No one’s harassing her.”
 
Mick sits forward a little in his seat.

“Bullshit.” Colin stands and points at Quin. “She’s at the top of the list, followed right behind by Teagan.”
 
He gestures at her too.
 
“Fuck … Liss can’t even take a nap without them in her face about it.
 
No wonder she hides out in the bathroom.”

My jaw drops open when all the brothers are suddenly standing.

“Easy, brother,” says Rebel.
 
“This isn’t the time or the place.”

Colin turns on him, his voice laced with bitterness. “When is the time,
brother
?
 
When it’s all over?
 
When she’s run out and disappeared because she’s tired of being ridden all the time?”
 
He turns his ire on the rest of the group.
 
“None of you know where she’s coming from or what she’s dealing with.
 
But I can guarantee you this … it’s a hell of a lot more than what any of you are dealing with.”
 
He gestures at Teagan.
 
“You think your father’s company shit is harder than becoming a mother?
 
Being homeless and jobless and penniless while pregnant?
 
I don’t think so.”
 
He looks at Rebel.
 
“You think being a business owner is harder?
 
Yeah, right.”
 
He looks at Mick.
 
“And you’ve got nothing to worry about.
 
You’ve got a job, a place, a girl.
 
What do you worry about at night?
 
Whether you’re going to get laid or not, probably.”

Mick roars and jumps at Colin, knocking me back into the couch in the process.
 
I fall down in a poof of cushions and my round ligament pain flares back to life.

“Aaaaah!” I scream, unable to stop myself as waves of agony take over my every thought.

Colin is flipped over the back of the armchair he was standing in front of and Mick is rolling around on top of him.
 
The chair bangs loudly into the table.

Teagan and Quin start squealing and jump over towards me on the couch.

I curl up into as tight a ball as I can while breathing heavily through the pain.
 
“Ohhhh, God, that hurts.”
 
I can barely get the words out.
 
My eyes are shut now as the knife-like pain slashes through my side.

“Cut it out!” Rebel yells.

A few grunts and groans later and some banging sounds, and the noise quiets down.
 
All I hear is heavy panting and my own moans of pain.

“What’s wrong with her?” Rebel asks.

“Fuck,” says Mick.
 
He sounds nervous.

“Alissa?
 
Alissa, are you okay?” It’s Teagan and she’s very close to my face.

“It’s just round ligament pain,” I say without looking at her.
 
“Just give me a minute and it’ll go away.”

“Nice, Mick. Fucking Grade-A. You just kicked a pregnant girl’s ass.” Colin is completely unconcerned for his own welfare, apparently.

“I didn’t mean to.
 
Shit, I’m sorry, Alissa.
 
I lost my temper.”

“Just go to work,” Rebel says in his quiet, controlled voice.
 
“I’ll deal with this.”

“You keep cleaning up his messes and he’ll never work this out with Colin,” Teagan says.

“What the fuck, Tea?” Quin asks, definitely mad.
 
“Messes?
 
Colin is the one making messes, not Mick.”