Trying Not to Love You (15 page)

"Baby, oh God baby," Dominic said, walking towards me.

I put my hand up. "Stop, don't you dare come near me." I looked past him to Brittany, who was sitting on the floor with mascara and tears running down her face. "Your roommates girlfriend huh?"

Brittany laughed bitterly. "So that's what he told you."

"Shut up!" Dominic screamed at her. "Baby I can explain…"

I cut him off. "There's nothing to explain Dominic." I stood there for a second staring at him. Everybody else had their eyes on me. I had to get out of here.

"Mase, give me your keys," he reached in his front pocket and handed them to me.

"NO! Baby wait…"

"Let her go Dom." Cooper said.

I ran down the steps, pushed my way back through the crowd to the front door and right to Mason's car at the end of the driveway where Hailey was waiting for me.

I unlocked the door and got in. Hailey knocked on the window for me to unlock the door, but I did not pay her any attention. I started the car and left. I had to get out of here.

I did not go home right away. I could not; they would be looking for me there. Normally I would have run to Hunter to vent, but not this time. I drove down Atlantic Ave to the parking lot for the beach. I locked up the car, walked down to the ocean and sat down in the sand, trying to process everything that had just happened.

Dominic cheated on me. He got Brittany pregnant. Brittany, his roommate's girlfriend, or at least that was what he had told me. He said he loved me and would never hurt me. Ha! I was stupid for believing him. I knew better. All the signs were there, but I choose to ignore them.

I was hurting, but I think what surprised me the most was the fact that he was stupid enough to get her pregnant. He came here on a full scholarship to play football. He barely had time for me. How would he have time to help raise a baby? Idiot!

He was not my problem anymore. He had made his bed and now he could lay in it.

Just when I thought things were going great with us, this had to happen. I had not seen Brittany since the day I had run out of the dorms, she had been outside crying. I bet she was on her way up to see Dominic. I thought back to that first night when I was with him. SHE had knocked on the door and he had told her that he was busy; I had known then that something was up, but I ignored it.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me.

I bet he cheated on me with Alexis too, after he told me there was nothing going on with her.

I sat there for a while, throwing myself a pity party. I knew I needed to pull my big girl panties up and face the music. I just hoped I have the strength to keep up my brave face for everyone. Times like this, I wish I were home, in my own room, where I could block out the rest of the world.

When I got back into Mason's car, I lost it. Who did I think I was kidding? I felt tremendously crushed. I had thought things would work out with Dominic in the long run. I had really wanted things to work out between us.

I took a few deep breaths, wiped the tears from my face and drove back to my dorm. Everyone was there; I knew they would be. Hailey had curled up with Mason on her bed. Cooper was sitting on the end of my bed with his head in his hands. Hunter was pacing back and forth.

"I'm fine." That is all I said, all I could say as I tried to hold back the tears. I would let myself cry again, when I was in the shower.

Hunter stopped where he was and looked at me; I nodded my head at him. He was waiting for me to give him permission to comfort me. He came over, wrapped me in his arms and rocked me slightly back and forth, just as he had done all those times before when I needed him.

"You ok?" He whispered in my ear.

"I will be. It'll just take some time to get over the hurt."

I dropped my arms from around him, and I went to sit on my bed next to Cooper. He slung his arm over me, and kissed me on my head.

We all sat there for a little while, no one talking, everybody in their own world. This was not helping me; I needed to do something to keep myself busy.

I needed a shower; I needed to wash this whole night away. I got up from the bed, grabbed my things from my dresser but stopped instantly when I looked in the mirror, and saw Cooper's face. He had a gash by his eyebrow that was bleeding.

He looked at me when I asked, "What happened?"

He shook his head. "Nothing."

His answer did not surprise me. He had been protecting me. I just stood there, staring at him. "Tell me, please." I finally say, breaking the eye contact in the mirror.

"Nothing happened Kenzie." Mason spoke up for the first time since I walked in the door.

I looked over at him. I noticed that he had a tear in his shirt and there was blood on it. "Whose blood is that?"

Hailey untangled herself from Mason, came over to me and wrapped her arms around me. I did not move to hug her back. I was pissed off that she did not try to warn me about what was happening. She may not have known exactly what was going on, but she knew it involved me.

"I'm sorry." She told me, and then let go of me as she walked back over to Mason.

"You could have warned me that something was going down with Dominic, Hails."

"I know and I'm sorry. I was trying to look out for you. You would have gone after them if you knew."

She was right, but still, it hurt.

I walked into the bathroom to take a shower, and I hoped when I was finished, everyone would have left.

I turned the shower on as hot as I could stand it and got in. I stood there, letting the water run over my body. I finally cried all the tears that I had tried so hard to hold inside me. I curled up into the fetal position on the shower floor and stayed that way until the water ran cold. I got up, quickly washed myself, got out of the shower and threw on my sweat pants and hoodie.

When I finally worked up the courage to walk out of the bathroom and face everybody, I was surprised that no one was in the room but Hunter. I did not say anything to him as I walked over to my bed and climbed in. I pulled the hood of my sweatshirt over my head, and snuggled into my pillow. I just wanted to go to sleep and forget today even happened.

Hunter walked over and turned the lights off. I waited to hear the door open but it did not. He pulled my desk chair over to my bed and started to rub my back, trying to comfort me.

The tears came back and slowly fell down my cheeks and onto my pillow. I tried to wipe them away so that Hunter would not know that I was crying again.

I heard Hunter's phone beep with an incoming text. He stopped rubbing my back and pulled his phone out. He cursed under his breath and said, "Dominic is on his way over."

I did not answer him right away. I just sat up. "I need to talk to him." I looked at Hunter. "Alone."

"No." He deadpans.

I did not respond back to him. I was not in the mood for another fight. Maybe it would be good if Hunter stayed here with me. I do not want to be alone with Dominic.

I gathered all of Dominic's stuff that was here, his jersey that I loved to wear every Saturday, and a couple of his t-shirts that I slept in. I walked over to the mirror on my dresser and took off the pictures that had Dominic in them. I took off the ring that he bought me for my birthday. I needed to remove everything that tied me to him.

I heard a knock on the door and then yelling in the hallway that startled me. I thought everyone had left but they had not. They must have been waiting in the lounge, watching TV.

I looked at the door as it opened and Dominic walked in. He had a black eye, split lip and a gash across the bridge of his nose. I felt certain that his nose was also broken. Blood covered his shirt.

"Baby…"

I cut him off. "Don't baby me!" I seethed through my teeth.

"I can expl…"

"No, no you fucking can't." I cut him off again. "There is nothing to explain. What's done is done Dominic."

"She's lying, Kenz. She can't be pregnant. We used protection every time. It's not possible. Even if she is pregnant, it isn't mine."

I crossed my arms across my chest and looked to the floor. "It doesn't matter if she is or isn't. We are finished. You told me she was your roommate's girlfriend. Now you are telling me that you used protection every time. Was she really your roommate's girlfriend?"

He ignored my question.

"So I guess you're leaving me for this asshat now?" He asked, looking over at Hunter who still sat in the chair next to my bed.

"No, I told you that you could trust me. I kept my promises."

"Give me a break. Just give it time. Your piece of shit brothers can't stop you from doing everything. You'll run to him. It's just a matter of time."

"Watch it Dominic, you can talk all the shit you want to about me, but don't bring my brothers into this. We have had our own fucked up problems all along." I growled.

He walked over to me and I could see the defeated look in his eyes but I did not look away from him. I stood my ground; he hurt me in the worst way.

He looked down to the ground, then back up to me and then back down to the ground. He reached in his pocket, pulled a little black box out and then dropped to one knee.

Are you kidding me? Please do not let this happen. This cannot be happening.

He looked up at me, a single tear running down his cheek. Hunter cursed behind me. The chair scraped across the floor, the door opened and then slammed shut.

I scrubbed my face with my hands. "Please don't do this." I begged Dominic.

"Baby, I love you. I fucked up, but that will never happen again. I want to spend the rest of my life with you; I want to take care of you. I want to start a family with you, and grow old with you. You keep me grounded when I am with you; I feel like everything in the world is right. I don't have that feeling when I'm not with you; everything spirals out of control. MacKenzie, will you marry me?"

I started crying, so hard that I could not even make out what the ring looked like. I shook my head no, and I heard him whisper, "Please Kenzie?"

"I can't Dominic. You broke me. You broke us. You don't want to marry me."

I wiped my cheeks with the sleeves of my sweatshirt and knelt down in front of him, so that we were eye to eye. "You're not in love with me…" He started to argue but I placed my index finger to his lips to keep him quiet. "Yes, you love me but we're not in love with each other. I don't think we ever were."

I dropped my finger from his lips and his head followed my hand down to my side where my hands now rested. I stared down and saw tears hit the floor. I almost feel bad for him, almost.

I gave him a few minutes before I stood up and went over to my dresser where the bag of all his stuff was. I walked over to him. He stood up and I handed him the bag.

"I'm so sorry I fucked this all up."

"I'm sorry you did too."

He walked over to the door but turned back to look at me one more time before he walked out for good this time.

After Dominic left, I turned the lights off and crawled back in bed just as I was before he came over. I just laid there and stared into the dark room when I heard the door open.

"Kenzie?" I heard a thump. Hunter must have walked into Hailey's bed. I picked up my phone from my bed and turned it on so he could see where he was walking.