Trying Not to Love You (17 page)

This is why Mason and I had a love/hate relationship; sometimes he was too over protective. "Mase I love you, but sometimes you need to let me learn my own lessons. You can't always be here to protect me."

"Well, while I am here, I am going to protect you. Please, for me, just stay away from him, and give yourself some time. I know he told me he loves you but he hasn't told you."

He was right. Hunter did not tell me directly that he loved me. I understood where Mason was coming from. I was not ready to think about loving someone else right now. I needed to concentrate on me, no one else but me.

"Get over here and hug me goodbye."

I hugged Mason, then walked over and said my goodbyes to Cooper, and then they left to head back to Boston. Hailey and I went back inside to help clean up our mess and then had Hunter take us back to the dorms.

God, I did not want to go back there.

Before we left Hunter asked me to take a walk out on the beach with him for a few minutes. Hailey just smiled at me and nodded her head at me.

I walked down the steps to the beach, slipped off my flip-flops and stepped into the sand. I loved the feel of sand on my feet; it had a way of massaging my feet. Hunter came up behind me, wrapped his arms around me and just held me for a while.

Hunter rested his chin on my shoulder and said, "I know you need space, so I'm going to give it to you but I just want you to know I'll be here waiting for you when you're ready. There is no one else CC that has ever had my heart like you. I'm sorry I never told you how I felt back then."

I did not answer him right away; I just stared out over the ocean. "Why now?" I asked.

He took a few minutes before he answered me. "After what I saw that asshat put you through, I can't have you going through that again. It is killing me seeing you like this. I know I fucked up last summer when I bailed on you like that, but you caught me off guard." He took a deep breath and then let it out. "I didn't know what to do."

"I get it, I do, but you hurt me too. I cannot go through that again. I need time."

"Your right, I did and it's been killing me ever since that night. I thought leaving you alone was the right thing to do. You met Dominic when I left for school, so I thought you were over me and I stayed away." He kissed the side of my head then continued. "I'll be here when you are ready to talk, but I didn't just say what I said because I was pissed that Dominic was asking you to marry him. I mean it CC."

"What did you tell Mason? I want to hear it from you." I needed him to tell me those three words more than I needed anything right now.

"You're not ready to hear them again." He let go of me, reached for my hand and walked us back to the house. I was slipping my flip-flops back on when he said, "When you're ready to hear those words I'll tell you. I'll tell you a million times, but I need you to know I mean them when I say them.

That was the problem; I needed to hear them now. He would not tell me and I could not handle that. I was already broken. I could not let him break me anymore then I already am. I need time to figure out things. "Ok let's go; I want to go home."

Over the next few weeks, I concentrated on me, school, work and nothing else. I was lucky enough that I had not run into Dominic at all since that night. I did see him a few times around campus, but I always turned and went the other way. Hunter, on the other hand, I still saw. We would still go to lunch after class, but that was it. I never went over to his house when Hailey hung out with him and Zeke. I was not trying to be a bitch but I just needed time, time to deal with all my shit.

Tuesday after class Hunter, Hailey and I were going home for Thanksgiving break. I could not wait. I missed being home. I had been talking to my mom a lot lately, trying to plan different things for Chloe's baby shower that weekend. That was a huge distraction for me. I knew once I was home, I would be busy. We were having everyone over for dinner Thursday, going shopping Black Friday and then Saturday was Chloe's baby shower. Mom planned it that weekend since we would all be home. Chloe was due in just three weeks; I was excited about becoming an aunt. I know Jackson was extremely nervous about becoming a father, but regardless, he was going to be a great dad.

Hunter called to make sure we were packed and ready to go on Tuesday. He wanted to get on the road before rush hour traffic started. "Yeah, I just put the last of my things in my bag."

"Alright I'm on my way over now; see you in a few CC."

"Alright, bye." I hung up the phone and asked, "Hails, are you ready? Hunter is on his way over."

"Yes, let's get the hell out of here. I miss my bed back home."

I raised my eyebrows at her. "Is that all you miss?"

"What else would I miss?" She asked, sitting on her bed, twirling her hair around her finger.

"Oh I don't know, maybe my brother?"

She started to blush and I knew that she was missing him like crazy. "No, why would you think that?" Then she started giggling.

"Yeah, sure" I answered, rolling my eyes at her.

There was a knock at the door and I yelled, "It's open." I was expecting it to be Hunter but it was not. It was Dominic.

Hailey jumped off her bed, stood next to me and said, "What the hell are you doing here?"

"I came by to say Happy Thanksgiving to Kenzie and to make sure she had a ride home."

"Yes, Hunter is giving us a ride home. Now please leave." Just as I finished my sentence, the door flew open and Hunter walked in with a murderous look on his face.

"What the fuck are you doing here? I thought I made it pretty clear to stay the fuck away from her." Hunter walked over and shoved Dominic towards the door.

"Chill out Hunter. I was just checking to make sure she had a ride home. I know Chloe's baby shower is this weekend, and she is looking forward to it. I would have called but she changed her number."

The day after all the shit went down, Cooper called and had my number changed, so there would be no way for him to get in contact with me.

"Yeah well, she did that for a reason Dom. Now get the fuck out."

Dominic looked over to me before he turned and walked out the door. I did not understand why he was trying to hang onto me. He did this to us, not me. He was expecting a baby in a few months for Christ sakes.

"You okay CC?" Hunter asked.

"Yes. Ready to go, Hailey?"

"Yes please, before any more bullshit goes down."

The ride home was fairly quiet. I sat up front with Hunter while Hailey curled up in the back and fell asleep. I was not in the best of moods since Dominic made his impromptu visit. Hunter could sense it, so he let me be. I was trying to get comfortable enough to take a nap but I just could not find the right position. Finally settling in, Hunter reached over and grabbed my hand, linking our fingers together. I fell asleep within minutes.

Hunter squeezed my hand, and I slowly started to wake up to him saying, "CC, we're home."

I stretched and asked, "You coming in to say hi to everyone, or are you going to head home?"

"I'm going to drop Hailey off then head home. Mom and Jaylinn are waiting for me. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Ok." I put my hand on the door handle and dropped his hand that was still holding onto mine, but stopped before I got out. "Thanks again for everything Hunter."

He smiled that smile that I loved so much and said, "Anytime."

I got out of the truck and made my way around to the bed where Hunter met me to hand me my bags. Before I could grab it, he reached over, pulled me into a hug and he kissed the top of my head.

I hugged him back and said, "Bye Hunter. When you wake Hailey up, tell her I will call her tomorrow."

"Sure."

I walked towards the house, so happy to be home and away from school for a few days. When I walked in, my mom sat on the couch reading and my dad sat next to her, watching TV.

"There's our baby girl." Mom said when I came into her view.

"Hey mom, hey dad, I'm exhausted. I'm going to head on up to bed. We'll talk more in the morning." I said while yawning.

"Ok, you need me to make you anything to eat?" Mom asked.

"No, we stopped before we got here. I just need some sleep."

I went up to my room, loving the comfortable feeling being home already gave me. As soon as I opened my door, I dropped my bags, went to lie on my bed and fell into a peaceful sleep.

The next morning after I got up and took a much-needed shower, I made my way downstairs. My mom was in the kitchen making breakfast. When I went in, my entire family, including Hunter, Hailey, Jaylinn, and Mrs. McCormick were sitting at the table.

"Well, look who decided to finally grace us with her presence," my dad said as he got up from the table to wrap his arms around me.

"Morning, guess I was more tired than I thought I was. I feel a lot better today. So Chloe, are you ready for this weekend? How's my nephew been treating you?"

"Girl he never stops moving. I am so uncomfortable. I cannot wait for this to be over. I have to wake Jackson up all the time because I keep getting bad back cramps and I can't get up out of bed."

"Aww, leave my nephew alone. He's getting tough before he comes into this family. He's gonna need his muscles with all his uncles around," I said smiling at her.

"I just can't wait until I get to finally hold him in my arms."

"I bet. So what's the plans today mom?" I went to sit at the only open seat at the table, which happened to be next to Hunter. He leaned over and whispered good morning in my ear. I replied by reaching for his hand under the table and giving it a squeeze. I cast a quick glance in Mason's direction and saw him glaring at me.

"Well, you and I need to get all the decorations for the shower and stop by the hall and check it out real quick. Then we're going to come back and pick up all the girls and go get pedicures."

That sounded relaxing, and was just what I needed. "Ok sounds good. Hails, you going too?"

"No, I'm good. I have to spend some time with my mom," she told me, looking displeased.

The rest of breakfast consisted of small talk made by everyone. Hunter and I eyed each other the whole time and he found small ways to touch me. I could not explain the feelings I was developing for Hunter, but I knew for sure that every time I was with him, I felt safe and at ease. I guess my heart had finally started to heal.

After cleaning up from breakfast, mom and I headed out to the party store to pick up decorations, balloons, party favors and everything else we needed for Chloe's shower. After stopping by the hall, which was beautiful and perfect for the baby shower, we went to the grocery store to pick up last minute things for Thanksgiving dinner. About an hour later, we were finally on our way home, but when we pulled into the driveway, Jackson was outside, pacing back and forth.

"Hey Jackson, what's going on?" I asked, walking towards the trunk to grab some of the bags.

"Chloe is having back cramps again and she keeps crying because they are causing her so much pain. She just kicked me out and told me to go take a walk."

Mom walked over to him and grabbed his arm, pulling him to the trunk of the car to help with the bags. "Jackson, you need to calm down. You are making this worse for her. Help me and your sister get these bags in the house and then I'll go talk to her and see if she wants to go to the hospital."