Authors: Toni Aleo
Fallon’s face warmed at the kind words. Fallon loved times like this, when there was no drama — no thoughts of what Lucas fucked up — just the three of them. Almost like a family, but then the past would poke its nasty head into Fallon’s brain and she would get mad all over again. She wished that she could forget it all, but she knew she couldn’t.
“You ready to go? I know Molly is probably waiting on y’all,” Fallon said, running her hand through Aiden’s hair. She looked up at Lucas and he was looking down at the table. His eyes were focused on something, probably on his name, and he looked up at her.
Fallon let out a frustrated breath as Lucas chuckled. “AJ, go to your room please. We will be leaving in few. Let Mommy yell at me for a minute.”
Fallon glared over at Lucas as Aiden ran out the room. When he reached the stairs, he leaned over the banister and smiled at them both before saying, “I think y’all should kiss again, and then get married and make me a brother!” He disappeared before Fallon could even form a thought.
“It’s too damn much. I ain’t cashing it,” she said, her southern accent getting more pronounced because she was beyond mad at him.
“Ah! You drive me insane,” he said, his arms moving with every word. “If you won’t cash the check, I will bring the cash to your house and dump it on your table! Your choice!”
“You drive me insane! Why can’t you just keep the money?”
“Why can’t you just cash the check?!” Lucas shot back.
“’Cause I don’t fucking want it! I don’t want you to think that you have helped me, that you have bought my forgiveness! I don’t want it!”
Lucas shook his head. “Believe me Fallon, until I hear you utter the words that I am forgiven, I won’t think that. Cash the fucking check, it’s for
our
child.”
“
My
child does not need it, and you need to lower the monthly payment. It’s too high. We don’t need all that.”
“
Our
child does need it; he will have the life I never had.”
“This isn’t about you!”
Lucas laughed, shaking his head. “You are right, and it isn’t about you either, but for some reason, you continue to make it about you.”
“I do not!”
“Fallon this whole argument is about how you don’t want me to think I’ve helped you, when all I want to do is help my child. Stop being difficult and cash the check for
our
son.”
“No,” Fallon spat.
Lucas went towards her, backing her into the wall. He sandwiched her head between his hands and got close to her face, looking her in the eyes. “Listen to me, Fallon. Cash the fucking check or I will take you to court and take Aiden away. If you won’t let me give him what is owed then I will do what needs to be done for my son.”
Fallon gasped as he continued to look her deep in her eyes. “I don’t want to hurt you anymore. I want to be civil but if you don’t work with me on this, my hands are tied. Cash the fucking check.”
“Get away from me,” Fallon spat, pushing him away, but he wasn’t going anywhere. “You aren’t going to threaten me!”
“It isn’t a threat Fallon, it’s a fucking promise. Aiden is my everything, and damn it, he will be taken care of to the fullest. Buy a bigger house with a yard, I don’t care. Give my son the best of everything because damn it, he deserves it.” Lucas gave her a long, heated look as Fallon tried to just breathe. This was the Lucas she remembered, the one that yelled and screamed to get her to see his way. He must have realized what he was doing because he closed his eyes, taking in a deep breath. “I would give you everything if you would let me, Fallon. Don’t you get that?”
Fallon didn’t say anything. She continued to take in deep breaths as he held her gaze. “I’ve been very forgiving with you about everything. Please, give me a chance.”
When Fallon didn’t say anything, Lucas shook his head and moved away from her. He didn’t even spare her a second glance as he grabbed his toilet paper tube family and left the room, calling for Aiden. Fallon took in shaky breaths, feeling like she was going to pass out.
I would give you everything if you would let me, Fallon.
Tears sprang to her eyes as she continued to take in shuttering breaths. He was right, she was a selfish bitch and she needed to let things go. She hated that she had brought Lucas to threatening her, even though she deserved it. He only wanted to provide for Aiden, he even wanted to make her happy, but Fallon didn’t think he could ever do that. The only thing she wanted was to forget so she could forgive him. Fallon would never love a man the way she loved Lucas, but with the nagging memory of that night, she would never be able to give herself to him.
Never.
**********************************
Lucas still wasn’t breathing right as he drove back to his house. Aiden was in the backseat singing along with one of Lucas’ CDs as they drove. Lucas knew he was wrong for letting the kid sing Chris Brown, but Lucas was so tired of Big Time Rush and plus he had just had it out with Fallon again, something that shook him to the core. All he wanted was to kiss her senseless, but instead he was threatening her. Lucas’ chest hurt every time he thought of the words he said to her. How could he?
He would never take Aiden from Fallon. Not only did Aiden love her, she was a damn good mom. Hell, great. She would do anything for Aiden, except take money from Lucas. What didn’t she understand? It was for Aiden. It wasn’t a payoff and it wasn’t guilt money. It was for Aiden to have a better life, one that Lucas was blessed to give him. He just wanted to provide for his family, that’s all. Lucas wanted to give them everything because they were his everything.
Lucas tried so hard not to laugh, but Aiden was such a cute kid. He chuckled a little as he nodded. “Let me tell you something kiddo, if I ever got the chance to always kiss your mommy, I would never kiss another girl again.”
Lucas laughed. Audrey was a nut, but damn he loved her. They had gotten close since she was the one to always bring Aiden to him when Fallon worked. They also loved to joke around and pick on Fallon, but most of all, she supported him in his endeavor to get Fallon back. “We’ll see, okay?”
Lucas blinked twice as he looked out onto the road. Shit, he thought the kid knew about babies and stuff. “Like Mrs. Adler. She has a baby in her belly.”
Lucas couldn’t agree more. He would do anything to go to Fallon’s store to make that baby, but first he had to get her to trust that he wouldn’t hurt her ever again.
And that wasn’t looking promising.
*********************************
“So you’re right next door?” Aiden asked from the middle of the bed that Lucas had bought for him. Lucas smiled as he nodded. He loved seeing Aiden in his hockey room, and seeing his face when he saw it for the first time brought unbelievable joy to Lucas’ life. Aiden had loved the room, but now he looked a little worried.
“Yeah, right next door. You need anything, you come in there.”
Aiden nodded. He was dead on his feet. They had been so busy since they had arrived home. After dinner with Molly, she watched as they played hockey and then they played games together until Aiden basically fell asleep at the table. Lucas was surprised Aiden lasted this long after his busy day, and now Lucas was ready to tuck his little guy in the bed.
Aiden went under the covers and Lucas came over to the bed, bringing the covers up to his chin the way his dad used to do. “I’m right next door,” Lucas reassured Aiden before moving away from the bed.
“Okay, good night Dad.”
“Night bud.”
Lucas went out the door, sending Aiden a smile over his shoulder before shutting the door, leaving it open a little just in case Aiden needed him. Lucas walked through the house, shutting lights off before going into his own room. As he undressed he couldn’t help but think of Fallon. He wondered if she was okay and if she was handling her first night from Aiden alright. Even with their awful fight, he still worried and cared about her. He needed to apologize; he had no right saying what he said. It was all out of anger and frustration.
After crawling into bed, he reached for his phone just as the knock came at the door. When it opened and Aiden popped his head in, Lucas smiled.
“Scared?”
“A little,” Aiden answered, standing so innocently in the doorway in his Spiderman PJs.
“Well, come on,” Lucas said pushing the blankets up as an invitation. Aiden gave him a cheeky grin before running into the room, and jumping over him to cuddle into Lucas’ bed. Lucas cuddled down beside him and smiled over at him. “Good night.”
“Night, Dad.”
Lucas lay on his side and watched as his son’s breathing slowed down until he was breathing evenly. As Lucas watched Aiden’s little face, he found himself at a loss of words at his beauty. His eyelashes kissed his cheeks and his little lips pursed every few seconds as he took in deep breaths.
He was perfect.
Lucas rolled over onto his back and looked up at the ceiling. He wished like hell that Fallon was there sharing the moment with him. That she could be spooned against him, watching their son and thinking that she was the luckiest girl on earth. He wished he hadn’t messed up the way he did because if he hadn’t she would be there. He took in a deep calming breath and reached for his phone.
As she paused, Lucas sat up, his legs hanging off the bed as he braced his elbows on his knees. He listened to her breathing and continued to wish that she was with him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean everything I said. I would never take Aiden from you, I was mad that you weren’t cooperating with me. You drive me insane.”