Authors: Katrina Penaflor
“Jesus, Emmy,
I knew when I saw you tonight I was going to have you. You’re fucking perfect.”
He reaches behind my back and takes off my bra. He squeezes my
left breast and kisses me again. This time, I don’t fall into it like before.
I’m also starting to taste the alcohol on his breath. He reeks of it. The haze
of my mind is starting to lift and I’m beginning to think more about what’
s happening.
He takes his
hand off my waist and moves it between my legs.
“Fuck,”
he says, drawing the word out. “No panties, Emmy. You were
practically begging for it tonight weren’t you?”
Not from you.
He’s rubbing me back and forth and instead of pleasure I feel
nothing.
I think my
body is trying its hardest to focus, to help me see more clearly that this
isn’t what I want.
I try with
everything in me to feel what I want to feel, but I can’t. Everything is wrong.
Danny isn’t Ren, he’s not who I really want. I need to put an end to this.
Danny will understand.
I feel Danny
push a finger inside me, and I shake my head back and forth.
“Danny no
more. I don’t think I want to anymore.”
“Come on
Emmy, don’t stop me now. I know you’re into this, your body wants it, I can
tell.”
“I changed my
mind, this isn’t what I want.”
I push his hand out from under
my skirt. “I’m sorry, you can sleep here on the couch tonight if you want to.”
I look at
Danny and instead of seeing understanding in his eyes I see anger.
“I’m not
sleeping on the fucking couch, Emmy. I came here to sleep with you.”
He continues to stay on top of me. He grabs the back of my head,
with more force, and tries to kiss me again.
“Danny, stop
it. I don’t want to sleep with you. I’m tired, drunk, and don’t want to.”
“
You can
’t lead me in
here, let me take off all your clothes and change your mind. Stop being a
tease.”
“Get off me.
I can change my mind I if I want to. Now stop it.”
I try to push him off my body but he doesn’t move.
He’s stronger
and larger than me.
I’m starting
to panic.
I try to
elbow him but he grabs my arms and pins them to the bed.
“Danny, no!”
I scream. I
’m
shaking, jerking my body in any direction I can to get him to move. Nothing’s
working.
“Calm the
fuck down, Emilie. I swear to—”
His body is
weighing me down to the bed.
And suddenly
it’
s gone.
I open my
eyes and see Ren. When did he get in here? He’s holding Danny by his shirt and
slamming him against the wall. “Are you fucking deaf? She said she didn’t want
you,” another shove into the wall. “You son of a bitch, why were you on her
anyway? Is this what you like? Taking advantage of drunk girls? Forcing
yourself onto someone when they tell you no?”
“You don’t
know what’s going on. She led
me
in here.
”
“
I don
’t give a
fuck what you think. She’s too drunk and she said no. Both of those should’ve
been reasons to stop. You’re lucky I walked in when I did, any further and I
would’ve bashed your head in. Do you hear me?”
“I knew you
wanted her.” Danny replies, asking for it.
The punch
sounds like a crack, and cuts straight through the air of the room.
Ren knocked
him to the ground in a second. “Touch her, look at her, think about her one
more time and I swear to god I’ll end you.”
He’s screaming his words
to Danny, who looks terrified. Good.
“Get the fuck
out of here,”
Ren says while pulling Danny’s keys out of his pocket and throwing
them on the floor. “
And
don
’t drive your fucking car.”
Without a
look back, Danny leaves the room.
I hear the front door open and shut.
The only thing
I can hear now is my breathing. Ren is sitting on the floor, legs bent and head
resting on his knees. He takes both his hands and wipes them down his face.
He looks at
me and I see an array of emotions cross his face. None of which I can place. He
stands up, reaches into the drawer of my dresser, and pulls out an oversized
T-shirt. I remember now that I’m almost naked. Bare completely from the waist
up.
Ren says
nothing, and I’m grateful for his silence. I wouldn’t even begin to know what
to say.
He places the
shirt over my head and I push my arms through the sleeves.
Ren gently
touches the side of my face and lifts my head to look at his. “Are you
alright?”
He asks it with a slight tremor.
The affection
touches me and a lone tear slides down my cheek.
I nod, still
unable to speak.
He opens his
mouth like he’s about to talk, but doesn’t say a word. He turns off my side
table light and pulls back the comforter on my bed. He lays down and pulls my
head to his chest. Holding me, comforting me.
“Thank you, Ren,”
I whisper after several minutes. He responds by taking my left
hand and holding it.
I allow three
more tears to slip before falling asleep.
Chapter Fourteen
Ren
Opening my eyes physically hurts me. The blinds
are open in Emmy’s room and the sun shining though isn’t helping the hangover
I’m waking up with.
My head is
pounding. I momentarily hold my arm over my eyes and try to fall back asleep,
but my body tells me that’s not going to happen. I need water and food—like ten
minutes ago. I should make something for Emmy to eat too when she gets up.
As I climb
out of her bed and head to the door I step on something hard. I look down to
see it’s a pair of car keys, they aren’t mine and I know Emmy doesn’t have a
car, so who left them here? I pick them up and that’s when I remember, Danny.
Shit. I rake my hand through my hair as the events of last night come back to
me.
I remember
getting back to Emmy’s house after the party, after Danny stupidly drove her
home. The door was unlocked and I had no qualms about barging right in. The
lights were off and I could faintly hear Emmy’s voice. When I got closer to her
room, that’s when I heard her telling Danny to stop, and from the sound of her
voice he wasn’t.
I stormed into
her room and when I saw him on top of her, I lost it. She was struggling
underneath him and I wanted to kill the bastard for trying to force himself on
her. When I threatened him it was like he didn’t even care. He had the nerve to
say I was stopping him because I wanted Emmy. Of course I want her, but no one
should take advantage of a woman like that
—
or anyone for that
matter.
I also
remember why I have his keys. I took them from him so he wouldn’t drive home,
not even thinking about whether he could get into his place without them. I’ll
have to give them back, but I know I can’t face him right now, I’ll end up
strangling him.
Mason will
have to help me out with this one. My phone’s still in my pocket, and I dial
his number while heading to the kitchen.
“Hey, man,”
he answers.
“Mase, I need
a favor. Are you busy?”
“Sure, what
do you need? And where are you anyway? You never came back last night.”
“I’
m at Emmy
’s place, can
you come over here?”
I hear a
whistle through the phone, “Emmy’s place, huh? Sounds like your night ended
well.”
“Couldn’t
have gone more opposite,”
I say seriously.
“Shit, what
the hell happened?”
“I’ll explain
when you get here.”
“Okay, see
you in a few.”
As I wait for
Mason to arrive, I make enough eggs for me and Emmy to eat when she gets up,
and I chug what feels like three gallons of water. All in an attempt to get my
body functioning again.
I’m still
eating when I hear Mason walk in the door.
“Does she
ever lock this thing?”
Mason says while joining me in the
kitchen.
“Usually,
yeah, but that was my fault. I was the one who didn’t lock it.”
“Got to be
more careful, Ren, leaving this door open allows guys like me to
wander
in and out
as we please.”
He says with a cheesy smile.
“Believe me,
I’ll make sure it’s always locked. And what the hell are you wearing anyway?”
Mason has on
basketball shorts, flips flops that don’t match, a tie-dyed sweatshirt, and a
fur hat.
“
You just don
’t
know fashion. There is nothing wrong with my outfit.”
“Your outfit
is so loud I could hear it before you walked in the door.”
“Ouch, so
you’re saying you wouldn’t photograph me in this? I would make a great model.”
“No. And besides
you know I don’t focus on the clothes, usually the faces and bodies. Everything
you’re wearing is too distracting.”
“Okay,
whatever. Let’s get to the point of why I’m here. What’s that favor you
needed?”
I almost
forgot about it. “Here,”
I say, handing Mason Danny’s keys. “I need
you to bring these to Danny.”
“Why do you
have these?”
Mason asks.
“He left them
here.”
“Why couldn’t
you bring them to him?”
“Because if I
see him I’
ll kill
him,
”
I try to say casually while tossing a few eggs around on my plate
with my fork.
Mason stares
at me for a moment before saying, “What the hell happened here last night?”
I go on to
explain how Danny took Emmy to her place after the party, and how I discovered
him forcing himself onto her when she was saying no. I left out the part of her
being topless, but include the punch and how I took Danny’s keys so he wouldn’t
drive drunk again.
“That
fucker.”
Mason replies. His face looks stunned over hearing the events of
last night. “But we stayed by the door, how did he get her out of there?”
“There was a
gate in the back.”
“Shit. Is she
okay?”
“She said she
was, but I didn’t really get a chance to talk to her about it. I was pretty
heated and we both just went to bed after Danny left.”
Mason sinks
his body down to sit on the floor, leaning his back against the bottom cabinets
in the kitchen. “I can’t believe he did that. I wouldn’t have asked him to join
us if I knew he was like that. I thought Emilie would have been fine out there
with him.” He stares at a spot on the floor in disbelief. “You believe me
right?”
I ditch my
plate of food on the counter and join him on the floor of the kitchen. “Yeah
Mase, I believe you. I didn’t see it coming either.”
The creek of a
door opening draws mine and Mason’s attention. We both watch as Emmy slowly
shuffles her way into the kitchen. The white T-shirt I put her in last night
goes almost to her knees, making it look like it’s the only thing she has on.
Her makeup is smudged around her eyes and her hair is a mess.
Still I think
she looks amazing.
She sits on
the floor against the oven, to the left of Mason and in front of me. She
doesn’t say anything, just sits there.
“I made
eggs,”
I say to break the silence.
She lifts her
head up then turns around and kneels at eye level to the stove. She grabs the
pan with eggs in it and gently touches her hand to the bottom to see if it’s
still hot. She sits down again and places the pan on top of her legs, eating
the eggs with her fingers.
“These are
cold.”
“I made them
a while ago, sorry.”
“It’
s fine. I
’m too hungry
to care.”
Emmy
continues to eat her food in silence, looking down as she does so. Mason gives
me a look as if saying, “What do we do now?”
I shrug my
shoulders. I’m just as confused as he is.
Mason turns
to Emmy and decides to talk first. “I see you forgot your pants this morning,
Emilie.”
She looks up
from her food and says, “I see you forgot to look in a mirror this morning,
Mason.”
“Another
hater. It’s not even ten a.m. and my ego has already taken a beating.”
“I’m sure
you’ll get over it. Can I see your hat?”
“You rag on
my outfit and now you want to see my hat?”
“Yes, now
give it to me.”
Mason pulls
off his fur hat and hands it to Emmy.
“Thanks, you’
re a doll.
”
She slips the hat onto her head. “This will make the perfect
pillow.”
Emmy moves the pan off her lap and to the floor, then lays down on
her side.
“Mason, what
are you doing here anyway?”
Emmy asks.
“I couldn’t
go more than twelve hours without seeing you.”
“What’s the
real reason?”
I give Mason
a look, begging him to not answer.
“Just stopped
by to see if Ren was here.”
“Oh.”
“And now that
I’ve seen he is in fact alive, and here, I’m going to head out. Later, sluts.”
“Bye, Mason,”
Emmy and I say in unison.
“I hope Mason
realizes I’m never giving him this hat back. And don’t tell him, but I secretly
love it.”
I laugh at
her comment, the brown fur hat looks like a big puff ball on the top of her
head. But I’ll still probably tell Mason. I won’t be able to help myself
.
Joking about
hats aside, I need to talk to Emmy about last night. I need to apologize for
not stepping in and taking her away from Danny earlier.
“Emmy,”
I say.
“Nope.”
She replies while shaking her head back and forth. She already
knows what I’m trying to talk to her about.
“Emmy, come
on, you know we need to talk.”
“No we don’t.
I brought Danny back here, I changed my mind halfway into hooking up with him,
and you came into my room and saved me when he wouldn’t listen. That is that, there
is nothing else for us to talk about.”
“Yes, there
is.”
“No, there
isn’t.”
“Yes,
Emilie
, there is.”
“Ren just
drop—”
“I’m sorry!”
I blurt out. “I’m sorry, Emmy. That is what I’m trying to say. I’m
sorry I let Danny come out with us last night. I’m sorry I didn’t step in when
I saw you were drunk and he had his hands on you, and I’m sorry I didn’t pay
closer attention and notice when the two of you left. I’m sorry you had to get
in a car with him. And I’m so fucking sorry that you ever had to be in the
position you were last night.”
I exhale a heavy breath.
There, now she knows what the hell I was trying to say to her.
Emmy has a
shocked look on her face. She doesn’t speak, just continues to lay on the floor
in that stupid fur hat and stare at me.
After about a
minute of silence she gets up and practically runs into her room.
“Emmy?”
I say. “
Emmy don
’t run off!”
I follow her into her room, and I’m surprised to see the door
isn’t locked.
I carefully
open it. I find her leaning against the side of her bed, knees bent against her
chest, and she’s crying, with body shaking sobs.
I go to her
side and wrap my arms around her body. Holding her tight, trying to take the
pain I can feel radiating off her body. The emotional, deep rooted pain that I
know carries a weight on her shoulders.
What has she
gone through? What is making my apology have her react like this? I want to ask
her, want to beg her to tell me, but I know I have to wait until she’s ready.
“Let it out, Emmy.
I’m here and you don’t have to hide this from me.”
“Nobody cares
for me like this, Ren. You’re the only one.”
Her voice is shaky,
scratchy from the heaves of her sobs. But her confession guts me. She’s been
all alone her entire life, but not anymore. Now she has me.
“You don’t
deserve to go through these things on your own.”
With that,
she somehow sobs even harder. And I wait, cradling her body like a child as I
desperately try to lift some of the pain that she carries.