Undying (7 page)

I looked at James who seemed to be surprised by his comment.

“Don’t tell me you stayed at the college the entire time. I will not forgive you that unless you tell me Catherine were here the whole time with you!” he teased.

“Richard, please… Catherine will be teaching at the college,” James informed Richard, visibly annoyed by his innuendo.

“Really, well I am going to have to think up some excuses to come and visit more often,” he threatened.

“Good day, Catherine… James…”

And off he went. I looked at James. He seemed troubled, and I wondered whether it was about Mr Cartwright’s comment or his promise to come and see us, or me, more often.

“Oh my, was that Mr Richard Cartwright? Oh! I missed saying hello!” Jules blurted out, breathing heavily from behind us.

“Excuse me ladies, please enjoy the rest of your day,” James said as he made his way back to the college.

“Catherine, did you meet Richard? How did you find him? Isn’t he just wonderful?”

Jules was over-excited.

“Well, tell me! What did you think? What did he say? Come on…”

“Jules, I don’t know… I only saw him for a moment.”

I didn’t want to tell her that he kissed my hand or that we may be seeing more of him and Richard’s remark about the old lady in London.

“Wait, did he make a comment to James about not seeing him in London over the break?”

Jules started laughing with excitement. She could tell from the expression on my face that she was correct.

“Oh, that Mr Cartwright! Now, he has been divorced for well over a year and he is quite the ladies’ man. He has been trying to lure Mr Barclay to join his wild ways, but Mr Barclay is not like that. He won’t have a bar of it. He seems to be completely loyal to the woman he loves.”

“Well our shift is over,” Jules announced. “Let’s go inside and have a cup of tea.” We started walking back to the main entrance of the college.

Tea again!

“Other than tea, is there anything else I should know about today and tomorrow?”

Jules giggled at my delicate tease on her tea intake.

“Well, we have no more official commitments for today, but tomorrow is our assembly. Mr Barclay will address the students, parents and teachers. Followed by… tea,” she belted out with a laugh. “You will meet Professor Davidson there. And Tuesday, school will officially commence.”

Such was Jules’s enthusiasm it was as if she had also just started working here.

After we had our tea, I went for another wander around the grounds, to explore on my own. Even though Jules gave a good tour, I still wasn’t certain where anything was. After a few hours walking around I started to feel more confident with my bearings. I made sure I had the bare essentials down: library, my class, James’s office, Dr Simons’ room and the great hall. I decided to head for dinner.

Over dinner, Mr Kemp unavoidably sat directly in front of me, staring at me like a hyena, chewing his food in a slow and theatrical manner with his napkin tucked into his collar. He was so arrogant; not even trying to hide the fact that he was watching me. Jules, as expected, chatted through most of dinner completely unaware.

I tried to ignore him but it was too hard. I wasn’t use to being made stared down like that. Once he finished his meal he sat back in his chair and continued to stare.

This had to be a practical joke being played on me, like an initiation, or was everyone oblivious
.

I looked away, hoping that when I looked back he would have disappeared, a trick I used to use as a child. Unfortunately it didn’t work then nor did it work now, however he did turn away from me for a moment. I followed his eyes to see what could have possible taken his attention from me; it was James. To my left a few seats away, for the first time this evening I noticed him.
Was he there all that time? I must have been so distracted by Mr Kemp not to have noticed
.

James, unlike everyone else,
had
noticed Mr Kemp scrutinising me and didn’t seem to be happy about it. His attention was entirely on him. Suddenly, James shook his head slowly from side to side as if to say no, and his expression appeared more annoyed. I quickly looked over to Mr Kemp, who seemed to be frustrated, fidgeting with his neck collar. He then abruptly stood up and left.

I couldn’t help but smile out of relief. I felt emotional… having someone look out for me like that… it was unexpected, but somehow natural. It felt as if James had been on my side forever
.

I looked over to James, his focus now on me. He didn’t turn away but continued to look intently at me. I couldn’t look away either, I just couldn’t help myself;
and why not, it’s not like anyone here notices anything
.

I didn’t know if I should be so presumptuous to say thank you, or to just continue to look into his beautiful eyes.

“Catherine,” I could hear Jules call out to me.

“Yes,” I turned reluctantly.

“Oh, Catherine, I feel awful that I left you out of the conversation. Dr Simons, has just had a brilliant idea, that you should maybe say something at tomorrow’s assembly.”

“What, no… No way,” I protested.

Jules seemed surprised with my reaction.

“Why ever not?”

“Jules… I just can’t… not to parents and teachers. Please don’t mention it again,” I pleaded.

“Of course, I would never want to make you feel uncomfortable,” Jules said as she grabbed my arm.

“Thank you.”

I was relieved. Not only did I avoid what could have been a total humiliation, but was reassured of her friendship, that couldn’t have come at a better time.

I slowly turned away wanting to see James again, but he had left.

C
HAPTER
F
OUR

“Knock-knock sleepy head, it’s time to wake up, assembly will commence in an hour,” Jules called from outside my door. I half opened my eyes. There was no way it was morning already.

“Are you awake?” Jules sung out.

“Yes, yes I am. Thanks Jules, I won’t be long… I will see you down there,” I yelled back.

“See you soon,” she replied.

I don’t even remember falling asleep. I couldn’t stop thinking about James all evening, what’s all that about – he makes me feel… like I’m not myself.

I sat up, and took in a deep breath. I started recalling some of my thoughts of him last night, and then quickly shook them out of my head with a mischievous smile. I also recalled dreaming of Victoria last night and that Charles Barton had tried to kiss her. Yuk! That was nauseating even as a dream.

I finally decided to get up and get ready, unsure of what to wear. I made my way to the closet. After a short while, I finally decided on my tight-fitting beige skirt with a sky-blue silk shirt and heels. Considering I felt drained, surprisingly I looked quite nice.

I left my room and not a moment too soon, the college was quiet and there was no one in sight.

I must be late!

I struggled to make good pace, restricted by my tight skirt and heels.

Finally arriving, I could see how late I was, the assembly had already commenced and the room was full. The students took up the front three-quarters of the hall with the teachers and then the parents sat towards the back.

One of the senior students was speaking on the microphone while James sat on the side of the stage with three other men. I quickly looked around to see if there were any vacant chairs close by, but there didn’t seem to be any. I could see Jules further up moving about, I guess trying to see if I was here yet. She was in the first row behind the students in the middle with an empty seat beside her.

There was no way I was going to take that seat; everyone would see how late I was
.

In front, a man unexpectedly stood up and started to make his way towards me. It was Richard Cartwright.

“Good morning,” he said once he reached me.

“Morning,” I continued to look forward, not wanting to encourage a conversation.

“Please, take my chair.”

“No… Thank you… I’m happy to stand.”

“I won’t take no for an answer,” he promised.

“Please, I am really fine here,” I said looking over to him with a half smile.

“Well, I will just have to stand here with you,” he said, crossing his arms and looking towards the stage.

I couldn’t help but notice that the women that were sitting close by him were looking back at me and didn’t seem to be happy. Left with no choice, I nodded to him and took his seat. I felt so uneasy having him directly behind me; I could feel his stare on me. The women on both sides of me were constantly looking at me from head to toe. I felt awkward and couldn’t see how I was going to last the whole assembly, until James got up and spoke. His words were powerful and in his presence I wasn’t bothered by who was staring at me or who I had upset. Nothing mattered, I was happy to be here with James in view. After the choir sung, James got up again to speak. Perfect.

“Professor Davidson you will be missed, we wish you all the best and look forward to your return.” The roar of clapping filled the room. “And finally I would like to formally introduce and welcome Miss Catherine White, who will be replacing Professor Davidson for the school year. If you could be kind enough to stand.” No clapping this time just a lot of chairs shuffling about trying to see what Miss Catherine White looked like. I was dumfounded. I had no choice but to stand, and when I did, the room again filled with clapping and some whispers. I stood for few seconds then sat down. Moments later the students started to make their way out of the hall. Parents and teachers immediately started to come together and speak. I could see Jules making her way to me swiftly.

“Catherine,” she yelled as she made her way towards me.

“Hi Jules,” I turned away, my face was still burning from embarrassment and I was trying my hardest to control it.

“Oh, Mr Cartwright, over here.” Jules shouted across the room waving her hands as she approached me. I looked over and saw she had got his attention and he was now heading our way.

“Good Morning, Miss Kent,” he said and then turned to me and smiled.

I looked away, wanting to see James.

“Mr Cartwright, I was so disappointed when I missed you yesterday, but at least Catherine had the opportunity to meet you
.”

“Yes, I was quite fortunate to have met Catherine yesterday.” He said, again looking at me not Jules, when in fact he was speaking with her not me.

“Excuse me,” I interrupted and left. I just had a feeling that Jules would be distracted with another person and would have left me alone with Mr Cartwright.

I headed to Professor Davidson who, luckily for me, was speaking with James. As I approached him, James noticed me and a smile spread across his face. My heart started beating fast and I prayed my red face would not follow. James introduced me to Professor Davidson, who seemed very friendly; we spoke for several minutes while James stood quietly.

“I am so looking forward to having you in my class for the next two weeks, until then have a wonderful day my dear,” he said with a smile and then excused himself.

“I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much,” James quietly asked.

“That would be the second time you have done that to me. I hope it will be the last,” I joked.

His smile turned into a quiet laughter. “After you have finished from here, will you come by my office to fill out some paper work?”

“Yes of course.”

“Good. Can I get you something to drink?” he said as he casually grabbed my arm. My whole body shivered at his touch, I took a step back bewildered. I could tell by the look on his face that he also felt something strange.

“Excuse me, Catherine I am sorry to interrupt. But Miss Kent wanted me to ask you… if you would like some tea, I think it’s suppose to be a joke of some sort. I don’t get it,” Dr Simons said confused to why he had to perform that particular errand.

“Thank you, Dr Simons. I do… but I can help myself.” I smiled to him and James and left.

After everyone but a few left the hall I made my way to James’s office, I felt somewhat embarrassed seeing him after my reaction to his touch but I found courage in the thought that he may have also felt something.

When I arrived, his door was ajar. I fiddled with my hair and blouse and knocked on the door. I waited a few seconds before I knocked again. As I did, the door opened. James was on the phone. He gave me a smile and signalled for me to come in.

His office was so rich in culture. The fireplace was burning strongly and its smell filled the room. Beautiful artwork was all over the room. The furnishings were dark timber and traditional. One wall was dedicated to books, and his desk was neat and professional. To my relief there were no family pictures to signal a lady in his life. I went to the window that was the only form of light in this dark room and looked out. It had started raining again. I felt so at ease in his office, more than anywhere else I had been on the college grounds. The fireplace gave out welcoming warmth and the sound of the burning wood crackling was soothing.

“Are you enjoying the scenery?” he asked.

I hadn’t realised that he had finished his call. He was only inches away and he smelt delicious. His voice was deep, yet gentle. Surprisingly, and with some difficulty, I turned back to the window.

“Yes, yes I am. I don’t think I’ll ever want to leave this country.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I feel like I belong here,” I said as I let out a quiet giggle.

I wanted to add that I also felt that I belonged with him, but I thought that was better left unsaid. I turned back to him and smiled shyly. He took a few steps back and leaned against his desk with his arms crossed. I walked towards him, and waited for him to speak.

“When we first met in your room… I know you had just hurt yourself and you were in pain, but I couldn’t help feeling that you were surprised in some way when you looked at me.”

Oh my! He did notice my strange behaviour…

“I don’t know what to say!” I shook my head and looked down.

“Is there something to say?” he replied quickly.

“Maybe… I mean look… you have seen my clumsy, helpless and ridiculous side I don’t think I will add insane to that list just yet.”

“Strange! The list I have is a lot different,” he said with a grin.

“You have a list? I asked surprised. He paused for a while and looked around. It seemed to me that he was preparing to let his guard down. And he did.

“Intelligent, sensitive and beautiful,” he proclaimed, as he turned and walked away.

I couldn’t contain my happiness. I tried to keep as calm and collected as possible, but it was too hard.

Could he possibly like me?

Maybe I could tell him
something
, but not
everything
.

“You know? When I first saw you, I was taken aback… I felt that I knew you already. But I know that’s not possible.”

The way he was looking at me was having a profound impact on me; I didn’t know what to say anymore. I smiled and stopped talking. I didn’t want to be tempted to say something that I might regret later.

“And…?” he surprisingly said taking a few steps towards me.

His body was within arm’s reach now. I thought quickly. I couldn’t mention my feelings for him, or that I thought that he belonged to me.

“Nothing,” I replied, with regret.

“I really don’t want to add ‘insane’ to that list of yours. I’m doing well so far and I don’t want to ruin it,” I joked.

He seemed expressionless, but at the same time, surprised.

“Do you think this rain will continue through the rest of the day,” I asked, attempting to change the subject.

“Pardon…?”

“The weather…”

“Right… That, I’m afraid, will be hard to predict,” he said cutting me off in mid-sentence.

James returned to his desk, picked up a file and then turned back to me.

“Catherine, here are the forms that you will need to fill out. Medical details, personal information, and we require your signature on a few papers. Please, feel free to sit down and fill them out here. They shouldn’t take long.”

He pointed to a guest chair at his desk and put the file down on the table. Immediately I went and sat down on the chair opening the file to start filling it out.

“May I have a pen please?” I asked.

“Yes of course, my apologies.”

He picked up a gold pen and handed it to me. I started to fill out the paperwork. Every so often I would stop and look up, ever so slightly, to watch him. I did not dare to look for long, desperately wanting to avoid being seen. James was beside the window, looking out, as I had been earlier. But of course, he wasn’t as relaxed as I had been. I could sense tension and frustration again.

Several minutes later, all the forms were completed. I collected them, put them back in order and rose from my chair.

“Well, I have finished. Where would you like them?” I asked as I walked towards him with the forms.

“Oh, I’ll just take them, thank you,” he said as he grabbed them from me. Our hands touched slightly and I could see in his face that he was feeling something.

Right at that moment, the phone rang. James looked at me with his gorgeous eyes for a few moments that felt like an eternity and then slowly stepped back and excused himself to answer it. I smiled back and indicated that I was leaving. I headed for the door and as I turned around to close the door I noticed his eyes were still on me. I shook my head. I was exhausted. My emotions had never taken such a beating like this before. I decided that I would to catch up with Jules. That idea was short-lived. Coming towards me was Mr Kemp. And to make matters worse, he didn’t seem at all pleased. He looked worn-out and untidy. There was a slight chance that he had no interest in me and was heading this way to speak with James, but his body language suggested otherwise. He wanted to talk to me I just knew it.

“Good morning, Mr Kemp,” I said as he finally reached me.

“Huh? Oh, yes. Good morning,” he mumbled, seemingly deep in thought about something else.

“Cathy, I must talk to you… But not here or now… but soon,” he demanded, somewhat nervously.

“It’s Catherine… not Cathy. What is it Mr Kemp?” I casually looked away from him hoping that would be all. His manner was making me feel uneasy.

“Oh, Cathy… Ah, Catherine, I have plenty to say and if you were a smart girl you would want to listen!” he warned. His voice was low and it appeared that he did not want James to hear from his office.

“Catherine, you don’t belong here!”

“What on earth are you talking about, Mr Kemp? I can’t believe you just said that.”

“It’s not your fault that you are here, but it will be if you stay,” he warned grabbing my arm.

“I’m not going anywhere, so leave me alone!” I yelled pulling away from him, unaware of how loud my voice had become. I could hear footsteps coming from James’s office and his door opened abruptly. James looked furious as he gave Mr Kemp a ghastly stare. Mr Kemp still had a hold of my arm.