Unfinished Hero 04 Deacon (35 page)

He left the diner, got in his Suburban, and
drove away.

* * * * *

For some fucked up reason he didn’t get, the
minute he got to a place that had Wi-Fi, he went out, bought an
iTunes gift card, and downloaded “Let Her Go.”

He listened to it often, every word defining
him in a way that was troubling, as if the man who wrote that song
read the words carved into his soul.

It was torture.

But it was a break from the torture of
playing Cassie’s song.

And he’d take that.

Because it was all he deserved.

* * * * *

Knight Sebring

Knight hit Raid’s contact and put the phone
to his ear.

“Yo,” Raid answered.

“Yo, Hanna good?” Knight asked and heard Raid
chuckle.

“Yeah, man, so am I, in case you’re
wondering.”

Knight wasn’t in the mood.

“You hear from Deacon?” he asked.

The humor was gone and Raid’s voice was alert
when he answered, “No.”

“Nothing?”

“Talk to me,” Raid bit out, now not just
alert, but uneasy.

“Got word, coupla sources, he’s keepin’ bad
company.”

“Name of the game, Knight.”

“Deacon had boundaries and we both know that.
Now, it would seem he doesn’t.”

“Names,” Raid demanded, now curt.

Alarmed.

Knight gave him the names.

“Jesus,” Raid murmured.

Yeah. Jesus.

Bad company.

“You gonna find him and talk to his ass, or
am I?” Knight asked.

“I gotta talk to Hanna then I’m on the
road.”

That was good because Knight could afford the
best and the best at finding people were Deacon and Raid and if
either one of them didn’t want to be found, there wasn’t a
snowball’s chance in hell of finding them.

Unless one was looking for the other.

“You need me, I’m there,” Knight told
him.

“Gotcha. Later. And Knight?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”

Raid disconnected.

Knight threw his phone on his desk and got
back to work.

But as he did it, he was uneasy.

* * * * *

Deacon

Deacon should have pulled his gun just to put
the fear of God into him when he opened the door to his hotel room,
but he didn’t. He didn’t, partly because Raid used his own vehicle
because he wasn’t hiding shit and partly because it’d take a
fuckuva lot more than a gun trained on him to put the fear of God
in Raid Miller.

He closed the door and Raid switched on the
light by the chair he was sitting in.

“Fuck, seriously? Drama?” he growled.

“Hear you’re not keepin’ good company,
Deacon,” Raid returned.

Deacon crossed his arms on his chest. “Was
wonderin’ why you were here. Now I’m wonderin’ when you thought my
shit was any business of yours.”

“You’re not messy,” Raid pointed out.

“Money’s better messy,” Deacon replied.

“Since when did you need money?” Raid
asked.

“Since I decided to buy an island and move
there with my favorite volleyball,” Deacon shot back, watched his
friend’s lips twitch, ignored it, and moved into the room,
shrugging off his coat and throwing it on the bed.

“You’re off the grid,” Raid said, his voice
suddenly low. “Then, hear word you’re not off the grid, you’re
fuckin’ vapor. Weeks on end.”

His time with Cassie.

Deacon cut his eyes to him barely turning his
head.

Raid knew why.

“What was her name?” he asked quietly.

Deacon looked away, shoving his hands into
his pockets, tossing keys and change onto the bureau, saying, “None
of your fuckin’ business.”

He’d made a mistake years ago. He let Raid
Miller in. He started liking him. He let the guy get to know him.
He picked a guy who was not stupid and he got to know Deacon. Now
Deacon knew he couldn’t hide shit from Raid Miller.

So he didn’t bother to try.

“What’s her name?” Raid pushed.

Deacon turned and leaned back against the
bureau, stretching his legs in front of him, crossed at the ankles,
arms crossed on his chest. He gave the man his eyes but said
nothing.

“You keep her clean?” Raid asked.

“She’s clean.”

“No one knows about her?”

“No one.”

“She burn you or you burn her?”

“Are you not gettin’ I don’t wanna talk about
this?” Deacon asked.

Raid studied him.

Then he remarked, “Man’s burned by a woman,
he moves on. He burns a good woman, he kicks his own ass until he
finds another woman and learns not to do that shit.”

There was no other woman for him.

Not one.

Deacon said nothing.

“The way you’re kickin’ your ass, Deacon,
could get you dead.”

“And that matters how?”

The air in the room went static.

“Are you fuckin’ serious?” Raid demanded to
know.

Deacon decided on more silence.

“One of the best men I’ve ever met,” Raid
told him and that was good to know. Raid was a good man and it was
good to have that back.

He still didn’t reply.

“Hanna likes you,” Raid stated.

“No. Your woman loves you. She loves you so
much she can’t see straight. She likes me ’cause you like me. She’d
like Hitler if you liked Hitler.”

When he was finished talking, he clenched his
jaw, the Hitler reference cutting close to the bone and he’d done
it to his damned self.

“You believe that, you’re whacked,” Raid
returned.

“Never said I was sane, brother.”

“Who said you couldn’t be happy?” Raid
retorted, impatience in his tone.

“I’m poison,” Deacon reminded him.

“She did it to herself.”

“I didn’t see it happening.”

“She did it to herself,” Raid repeated.

“I didn’t protect her.”

“She did it to herself,” Raid said again and
Deacon lost it.

Uncrossing his arms and curling his fingers
around the edge of the bureau, he leaned toward his friend. “Ass in
a sling, brother, hangin’ from her hands on a hook, legs tied wide
open, pussy offered, mindlessly takin’ cock. And they were lined up
for her, Raiden, lined up to take their turn. All that so she could
get her fix.”

Raid flinched, muttering, “Deacon.”

“Charged in there, got her down from that
hook, she looked at me, had no clue who I was. No fuckin’
clue
. She sold the rings I gave her to buy heroin, but I
gave her those rings, man. She walked down the aisle to me cryin’,
she was so happy, and she didn’t
know
me
. Tried to
get her out of there, got the beating of a lifetime, took it,
fought it, nearly died from it. Through that, she wandered back
into that fuckin’ hellhole to be strung back up, fucked in the
cunt, up her ass, jacked off on, my wife covered in dozens of men’s
cum, that shit dripping out of every orifice they could reach, not
feelin’ shit but the high or the need for another needle filled
with junk. Her husband outside, left in the alley, near dead, and
she didn’t give a shit. ”

“That’s it, man,
she
didn’t give a
shit.”

“She was
my wife
.”

Raid leaned in to his elbows on his knees.
“By then, your wife was dead. That piece was nothing and she
did
it to herself
.”

Deacon shook his head. “We’re done talkin’
about this.”

“You said she had good folks. All that was on
her.”

“Good folks?” Deacon asked. “Fuck, man, they
hid that shit from me. Three stints in rehab before she was twenty.
They didn’t say shit. Jeannie sure as fuck didn’t. I put that rock
on her finger, they broke the record plannin’ our wedding, tyin’
her to me so I’d take on her shit. And they didn’t clue me in to
any of that.”

“And that’s your problem?” Raid asked. “You
told me they were decent. That doesn’t say decent, Deacon. That
says they’re bullshit liars, just like she was. They knew you were
a good man. They tied your hands. You didn’t know what you were
dealing with. How could you do shit for her if you didn’t know she
had a problem?”

“Money went missing.”

“And to stop it when you noticed that, she
was turning tricks before she got in too deep and sold her soul to
the devil. Or in her case, her body.”

“I should never have told you any of this
shit,” Deacon ground out.

“You did. Deal with it and explain to me how
that means, since she threw herself in the pit of hell, you have to
live there with her even when the bitch is dead.”

“She’s my wife.”

“
Was
your wife.”

“I loved her,” Deacon clipped. “Fuckin’
loved her
. Visualize Hanna on a hook, takin’ cock that’s not
yours, and tell me you would not take that on, that she was with
you and you were happy then she was on that hook and you didn’t
stop it.”

Raid shut his mouth. He’d visualized and
Deacon hated himself for giving his friend that but he had no
choice.

So Deacon was going to give all of it to him
so he’d shut the fuck up.

“You want it all?” Deacon asked but didn’t
let him answer. “Told you what I told you but didn’t give it all to
you, brother. You got grit, but no man has that much grit, I
fuckin’ know. So I saved you from the nightmare, but here it
is.”

He took in a breath and held Raid’s eyes.

“I went back. Twice. Tried again to get her
out. Twice. Once, got my ass shot at. By the time I got the
firepower to take my back and made a plan to extract, my informant
inside told me it was too late. She died on that hook, Raid.
Overdose. They reckon she took cock from at least two guys in her
dead body before someone figured it out and pulled her down.”

“Jesus Christ,” Raid whispered.

“Yeah. Pretty picture, isn’t it?”

“Brother.”

“Cleaned her with fuckin’ bleach, dumped her
in a ditch. Made the news. Missing woman found dead. Grieving
family still relieved because they now have answers. Bullshit. Her
parents were relieved the nightmare she made of her life was over.
My parents were relieved, hoping the nightmare she made of
my
life was over.
I
was
not relieved
. Buried
her, walked away. Walked away from her parents who did not give me
the knowledge to find the tools to help my wife. Walked away from
everything.”

“I know.”

“And that’s where I gotta be.”

Raid held his eyes.

Then he said, “Tell me her name and where she
is.”

Deacon’s chest started burning. “Fuck, man,
you do not get this but you’re gonna have to. I’m not givin’ you
dick.”

“She’s clean, let me and my boys make sure
she is. Check in on her, she’ll never know. Keep an eye on her.
Make certain nothin’ from you leads to her.”

“You think I’d let that happen?”

“No. I also think you love her and you’re
gonna give me her name and location so my boys and I can look after
her so you can make sure she’s covered even if you know she won’t
need it.”

“Cassidy Swallow, Glacier Lily Cottages,
Antler, Colorado.”

“My backyard,” Raid murmured.

“Yeah.”

“You love her.”

Deacon clenched his jaw again.

“You break her?” Raid asked.

That burn in his chest spread. “It’ll be you
lookin’ in on her and don’t give me your shit, Raid. I know it’ll
be you, you won’t send one of your boys. You’ll take care of her
personally. So you’ll see. And when you do, you’ll know she’ll find
a man.”

“You break her?” Raid pressed.

Tired of this shit, Deacon gave it to
him.

“You heard the song ‘Say Something?’”

Raid again flinched. He’d heard it.

“Yeah,” Deacon whispered.

He broke her. He didn’t stay around to watch.
He still knew he did it.

That burn spread further.

Raid stood, saying quietly, “Give me
something.”

Deacon didn’t respond.

“Come stay with me and Hanna. Give it one
shot. See what it’s like when a man feels like he lost everything
good, gets a second chance, and learns his future includes
better.”

Deacon remained silent.

“It can happen for you if you let it.”

“You want us to remain anything to each
other, Miller, your time to stop talking is now.”

He said it. He meant it.

Raid knew it.

His friend nodded.

Without another word, Raid walked to the
door.

He was standing in it when he looked back to
Deacon, and because he was a damned fine man, if an annoying one,
he pushed it.

“Known you a long time, never knew you to be
wrong,” he began. “Until now. You deserve to be happy. You don’t
think you do but you’re so fuckin’ wrong, it hurts to be in the
same room with you. But even if you don’t believe that, I know in
my gut you wouldn’t find a woman who didn’t deserve that too. And
it’s
you
takin’ that from her.”

“According to you, I was wrong the first
time.”

“Lesson one from Deacon when he taught me
everything I know,” Raid fired back. “You got one shot to learn
from your mistakes. You think you drilled that into me, I don’t
know you never made the same mistake twice, you’re fucked in the
head.” His voice lowered. “But I know you’re not. I know you know
she isn’t Jeannie. And I know that this time, you
should
kick your own ass that you’d even insinuate that about the good
woman who made a dead man’s heart start beating again. A woman you
broke.”

On that, he closed the door.

* * * * *

Raiden Miller

Raid stood in the trees, binoculars to his
eyes trained on the brunette doing something to the window boxes at
one of the cabins littered by the river and through the woods.

He got it. He got it for a lot of reasons,
not least of which she was fucking gorgeous. Unbelievable. Not a
hint of makeup and she could be on the cover of
Sports
Illustrated
in a bathing suit. If he didn’t have beauty warming
his bed and making his life so sweet it beat back nightmares that
would break a man, he’d want in there.