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Authors: Kimberly Bracco

She looks annoyed as she enters, as if she’s the Queen of England and I’m inconveniencing her. I follow her gaze as she looks around with distaste, clearly thinking she’s better than Quinn and me. I wonder if the
I-just-sucked-on-a-lemon
look is because she’s just figured out that Quinn’s home décor is as high end as hers—if not more.

“What can I do for you, Melissa?” I ask, moving into the living room.

She doesn’t follow. She just stands in the entryway, looking at me as if I’m a speck of dirt on her shoe. “It’s more like what can
I
do for you, Ashley. I’m going to give you some advice and save you some time and heartache. Tanner will never fall for this. You aren’t the first one that’s tried it. There’s a reason that Tanner and I have the relationship that we have. I understand him in ways no one else can. Why do you think we’ve lasted so long? I was fine letting him play with you, knowing that it would never go anywhere. As you can see, I was right. You played your cards too soon. Do yourself a favor and just get rid of that thing. I’ve been by Tanner’s side since you dropped this little bomb on him, and I can assure you, he wants nothing to do with you or that little scheme you call a child.”

I stand tall, bringing myself up to her level. “Who the hell do you think you are? How dare you come into my home and tell me what to do with my baby?” No way will I let this bitch think I’m beneath her.

“Well considering you planned on using it to trap Tanner, I have every right. You’re not going to fuck up my life with that baby. I’m sure it’s not his anyway. Do yourself a favor and get rid of it. Try and save some of your dignity. Who do you think he ran to when you pulled this stunt? Me. I’m the only woman he trusts. Just last night, he said what a mistake it was to ever let another woman into his life.” She emphasizes the words
last night
, obviously trying to rub it in my face that she was most likely helping him fuck out his frustration. I guess it didn’t take him long to go back to his old ways. “It’s been me for almost a decade. It will always be me. Now, thanks to you, he sees that even more. You’ll never stand a chance now.” She sneers.

“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” I knew it. I’d known from the beginning that this bitch wasn’t who Tanner thought she was. Fake fucking twat.

“I will be the one he chooses in the end, Ashley. We’ve even been discussing him taking over Daddy’s business when he retires. We’re planning a future. Together. And I don’t want that bastard baby fucking up my vision. I haven’t stood by patiently all this time for you to come in with your cliché little plan and mess it all up. Get rid of it. Because Tanner will never accept it, and neither will I. You should really think about all that, Ashley.” She turns to head for the door, but I can’t let her leave without making sure she knows that nothing will stop me from having this baby, including her threats.

I let her have it as I approach her. “As much as I wish he wasn’t, Tanner is this baby’s father. There’s nothing you or I can do about it. Get over it.” Fucking bitch.

She stops to face me once more, giving me an
oh please
look that vanishes quickly as I continue toward her. Each step I take causes her to take one backward.

“Oh, and if you were really
with
Tanner last night, you would know that I want nothing to do with that asshole. I’m glad you think I’m competition, but you can have him. I’m too good for him.” I feel proud of the nasty look she’s giving me and decide to share another piece of my mind with her as she backs through the open doorway. “And by the way, desperation doesn’t look good on you, sweetheart. Coming to a pregnant woman’s home and telling her to abort her baby is pathetic. Please tell Tanner not to send any more messengers over. I won’t change my mind. My baby and I are no longer his concern.
We
don’t accept
him
,
and he’ll never be a part of our lives again!” I want to scream that last part in her face, but I refuse to sink to that level. “Get the fuck out of my house, you stupid bitch.” I slam the door in her face, wishing I had gotten a picture of her shocked expression before I did.

Who the fuck do these people think they are? I couldn’t make this shit up if I tried, and I’m a writer! I won’t let her get to me though, because that’s what she wants. I don’t know if I should believe her claims about Tanner, but my gut’s telling me that I should. Of course, he has run right back to her. And why wouldn’t he? He thinks that the sun shines out of her ass and has no clue what a nasty snake she really is. If he’s going to be with her from now on, I’m glad that I made the decision to keep him as far away from my baby as possible. I don’t need that bitch anywhere near the baby either. I can only imagine the horrible things that woman would do and say the minute Tanner turned his back. No, thank you! Those two really deserve each other after all. They both hide their true colors well. Lucky for me, I seem to be able to bring the truth out.

I turn on the stereo and scan until I reach the local radio station that plays Christmas music twenty-four seven. No one can be in a foul mood when Christmas music is playing; it’s truly impossible. Then I get back to my writing, picking up where I’d left off in my article and immersing myself in the land of Christmas. I stay there until I finally glance at the clock and realize it’s time to shower and get ready for my shift at my new second job— a local sports bar called Legends.

After Tanner ripped out my heart, I went looking for a second job immediately, and I was hired on the spot. For obvious reasons, a sports bar isn’t exactly an ideal work environment for me, but they were the only place I found hiring short-term and willing to let me stay on past the holidays. I finished my training last week, and this is going to be my first night on my own. Everyone there has been great so far, and they’re aware that I’m pregnant. Marshall, the owner, said I’m a perfect fit for right now since I won’t be able to work at a bar for very long. They only need temporary help because of the extra rush from the Jets having a great season. Marshall also said that after a while, I’ll be a liability because of the nature of the job, so at least he won’t feel bad letting me go in a few months. I’m set to stay through March Madness, and then I’m leaving. He did tell me that, if things work out and I like it there, if he needs help here and there in the future, I’ll be his go-to girl.

I’ll be working four to five shifts a week for the time being, three of which are during football games—Thursday nights, Sunday afternoons or nights, and Monday nights. I’m doing Fridays too since that’s a busy night in Hoboken. The bar is on the opposite side of the city from my condo, but it’s only a ten-minute drive with no traffic.

I’m stoked to think that between four shifts, I can hopefully squirrel away a decent chuck of money each week. Bella, the girl who trained me, also told me to take to advantage of Thursdays while I can because after football season, they’re kind of dead. Apparently not all the cable companies carry the channel that the Thursday night games are on, so anyone who doesn’t have the channel and wants to watch them heads out to local bars. That’s the only thing that sucks about this job: football. How can I escape Tanner when four times a week, I’m hearing all about him on five different big-screen televisions? He’s everywhere.

I hear the door slam just as I turn off the hair dryer, alerting me that my darling best friend, Quinn, is home.

“Ash?” she yells from the entryway.

“In my bathroom.”

“What’s up, slut?” she asks when she reaches the doorway between my bedroom and the bathroom.

“Such a lovely greeting, my dear.” I smile at her.

“Blow me, bitch. How was your day?” She plops herself down on the closed toilet and grabs her copy of
Cosmo
off my counter.

“Fine, until that bitch Melissa showed up to inform me that it’s best for everyone that I kill my baby,” I tell her, rolling my eyes as I wrap a section of hair around my curling wand.

“Shut the fuck up. No she didn’t!” Quinn actually looks shocked.

“Yup.” I unwind my hair from the wand and turn toward Quinn, giving her my full attention. “She also informed me that she and Tanner were together last night, discussing their future, and that my baby doesn’t fit into it. Oh! And she also admitted that she’s totally in love with him and swears they’ll wind up together now that I’ve ‘played my cards too soon,’” I explain, making air quotes.

“Fake fucking twat,” she says.

I can’t help but crack up, laughing so hard, my eyes tear up.

Quinn gives me a weird look, as though she doesn’t understand my reaction. “Not that I don’t love seeing you laugh like that, but care to share what’s so funny?”

“I called her the same thing—a fake fucking twat,” I say while I settle myself down from my laughing fit.

“No, you didn’t!” She gasps.

“Well, not to her face, but I did in my mind. When I figured out that she was basically telling me what I knew along, my first thought was ‘fake fucking twat.’” I pick my curling wand back up so I can finish my hair for work.

“Well, she is. She’s got some balls though. Might even give mine a run for their money,” she says, going back to flipping through the magazine.

I stop, curling wand midair and give Quinn’s reflection a pissy look in the mirror. “Who cares about how big her balls are?” I snap before proceeding to replay every detail of the conversation back to her.

“Good for you, bitch. It’s about time you started hardening that spine of yours. You’re going to need to make it bulletproof soon,” she says with a sad look in her eyes. We both know she’s right though. The road ahead isn’t going to be easy, and I know people are going to be criticizing me left and right, the same way they do to every other single mom out there.

I smile at Quinn to let her know that it’s okay. I’m prepared for it.

“So, tonight’s your first shift by yourself, huh?” she asks with her nose still in her damn magazine. That thing is like Quinn’s Bible.

“Yup. And Bella said that you can make a killing on a busy Friday night, so I’m really hoping it’s packed tonight.”

“Me too. You better use that ass of yours to make a few extra dollars before it gets all fat on you.” She chuckles.

“Fuck you, bitch. My ass will not get fat.” I turn around so I can check out my ass in the mirror, giving her with a nasty look in the process. “You’re just jealous that my ass now looks better than yours.”

“Yeah, sure. That’s what all preggos say before they get as big as a house. You’re lucky the bar has a lax dress code. You’re not going to fit into those jeans much longer.” She laughs again, sounding way too much like a hyena. Glad she finds herself so funny.

“Go fuck yourself, Quinn. I’m going to look amazing and that’s a really mean thing to say to your hormonal, emotionally vulnerable best friend. You’re lucky I’m controlling my urge to slap that stupid smirk off your face. I know you’re just trying to get a rise out of me so beat it. I need to finish getting ready for work, slutbag.” I growl at her.

She leaves the bathroom, laughing to herself but not before slapping my ass with her stupid magazine. Some best friend she is.

 

 

I plop onto my bed, exhausted. Tonight has been grueling but oh so worth it. I didn’t sit down once from the minute my shift started at seven until the bar closed at two—seven straight hours of non-stop running. The three hundred and twenty dollars in my pocket make it more than worth it. Bella hadn’t been kidding when she’d said that you can kill it on Fridays. I’m sure it wouldn’t have been so bad if I hadn’t already been tired simply from being pregnant, but I won’t complain—not out loud anyway.

I know I should probably take a shower before I fall asleep, but I can’t force myself to get up and do it. Then I remember how many drunk men have grabbed my ass or some other part of my body tonight, how many times I had to dip my hands into that nasty ‘sanitizing’ bucket to wipe down tables, how many bar glasses I helped rinse and put in the dishwasher, and how much beer was spilled on me throughout the night. Remembering all of that has me running to the shower to scrub off the grime. Feeling decontaminated, my eyes close the moment my head hits the pillow.

It feels as though I’ve just fallen asleep when Quinn barges in and starts bouncing on the bed and poking me in the side over and over. “Wake up, bitch! It’s your birthday, and you’re going to sleep the whole thing away,”

“I just went to bed. Leave me alone,” I grumble back, swatting her hand away.

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