“We’re learning to trust each other,” he said, “if that’s what you mean.”
“You know that’s not all I meant.”
“And you know by getting me involved as her monitor, what that entails.”
“I was hoping you’d be gentle. I would hate to see her feelings hurt.”
Jed arched his brows. “Sleeping with Alex is making you soft, darling,” he mocked. “Elena’s feelings have never been your number-one priority before. You, or rather your higher-ups, wanted to see the extent of her gifts and abilities, and wanted someone with whom she could get personally involved. Bonding, I believe you yourself called it. Care to cut the bullshit and tell me what’s at stake here? Besides the supersoldier-spy part, of course. I know that’s important, but there’s something more that you aren’t willing to tell.”
T.’s eyes widened, a triumphant gleam entering the golden brown depths. “You have feelings for her,” she breathed. “I’m pleased.”
Jed didn’t deny it. No need to. He acknowledged a certain mix of possessiveness and yearning for Elena Rostova, feelings that he was willing to explore a bit more if only he had some time.
“I’ll give you that. Now your turn,” he said. There was a silent agreement between T. and him. Give a little, take a little. That way they both could walk away winners.
T. combed her hand through her blonde hair, a small satisfied smile settling on her perfectly shaped lips. “While working on the ring-alarm, I’ve come across something that confirmed something else I’ve been working on. There’ll come a time when Helen might need someone she can trust.” Her expression suddenly turned serious. “She could reject my friendship with her, thinking I’ve betrayed her. It’s good to know she’d have you by her side.”
“You’re making me more curious than ever,” Jed murmured. “Are you betraying her?”
“No. I’ve been having certain suspicions about certain GEM inner circle things and have some of them confirmed, but not enough to really say anything. I have no solid evidence. It’s big, Jed. When it blows, all GEM operatives will need to take cover. As for Helen—” Tess paused. She shook her head. “I’m not willing to bring it up before its time. There’s a list of dangerous weapons to take care of first. Like you love to say. Do the job. Everything else will take care of its own.”
Everything she’d told him so far was both nothing and yet, something. NOPAIN at its best. She was right, though. “I’ll stick to Helen,” he assured her, then leaned forward to wickedly add, “like your man’s sticking to you. Seems like you’ve got to learn to trust your feelings, T. Go for it. Give in to him. Let yourself trust him.”
T. shrugged. “You forget. He doesn’t trust me,” she said.
“Well, then, aren’t we both in the same hot water?”
“Helen will trust you eventually, darling. She’ll figure out that you’re a softie inside,” T. said smugly.
“And so will Alex trust you eventually, darling,” Jed drawled. “He’ll figure out that you’re not totally heartless.”
T. stared at him, then started to laugh. Her beeper went off.
“I bet I know who’s looking for you,” Jed mocked.
T. smiled. “Goodnight, Jed. I actually like you when you’re tired. You’re less guarded.”
“Using NOPAIN on a tired man is very amateurish, T.” He was tired, but knew she was just baiting him too. Another Jed and T. unspoken rule: Always leave with the last word, if possible. “Ooops, is that Alex down there staring into my micro-eye? I believe it is. How is a tired operative ever going to get his beauty sleep?”
T. made a face and turned around, clicking the door shut behind her without another word. Jed noted that she never answered her beeper or checked the video screen. He would have found that amusing if he hadn’t understood the urge to check on someone sleeping too damn far away at this moment.
He secured all the codes, set the alarm, stood up and stretched. Was she dreaming about him tonight? Or would he dream about her instead? He rubbed a hand over his eyes. Either way, it just wasn’t going to be the same without them dreaming together.
Chapter Sixteen
“Miss Roston, wake up!”
Helen grunted, trying to crawl back into the dark fog of sleep, but the shaking was persistent.
“Miss…Hell, Miss Montgomery said you wanted to be awakened early enough to go to a meeting. Would you rather sleep?”
Oh, yes, sleep. That was what she’d rather do.
“You can stop shaking her, Derek. She should just stay in bed. I can fill her in about the meeting later when everyone’s gone off.”
Her eyes snapped open at the sound of another familiar voice. Heath Cliffe was standing beside Derek, Dr. Kirkland’s assistant, his arms crossed in front of him. Amusement filled his eyes, as if he knew she would react to his statement.
“Good morning,” he greeted. “T. sent me down here to make sure you get up. She told me you have some interesting questions to ask our Number Nine.”
Good old T. That was Heath’s main job—asking questions. He was The Interrogator, the one who could break the obstinate ones. T. knew she would pique his interest if she brought up questioning Jed McNeil. After all, what interrogator would want to miss Jed McNeil avoiding questions? Besides that, Heath was the only one among the commandos interested in using the new serum. He would like to watch her as it entered her system. Drugs, questions, personality changes—these were subjects dear to Number Eight’s heart.
“Are you awake, or are you remote viewing?”
“Funny,” Helen managed to whisper, then groaned. “I feel like shit.”
When she’d first experienced downtime—the aftereffect of a long RV session—she had likened it to being drunk. It wasn’t unpleasant, because she mostly slept. The following days, her mind felt drained and her concentration was shot. She and the others in the program weren’t allowed to drive afterwards.
However, the prolonged session with Hades had packed a wallop. She felt like she’d been in an Iron Man contest. Last night, she’d done something that someone her level shouldn’t have been able to—gone off using two universal agreements and popping up all over the ether.
And she’d almost not come back.
“You’re staring into space again,” Heath said quietly. “What do you want to do, Hell? Get up? Sleep? Your choice. Jed would want you to rest, of course, after what you’ve been through last night, but he’s already up and about, all bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.”
Hell’s eyes widened sardonically at the “bright-eyed and bushy-tailed” remark. “That’s the best you can do to get my competitive juices up?” Her voice sounded a little stronger. “Is he really up already? Ugh. Hey, Dr. K. Got my morning juice?”
Dr. Kirkland nodded, looking at her charts. “Everything was normal while you slept and everything looks good now. I’ll let you take half the dosage this time. We’ll see how your body adjusts to that.”
“No late night hot tubbing in your near future,” Heath said, a teasing reminder of their private encounter.
He really had the sexiest, meltiest puppy dog eyes. Helen pulled her sheet up to her chin, remembering the last time she’d made the mistake of getting into the hot tub in the training rooms naked, thinking no one was around at that late hour. Heath had shown up and almost trapped her there.
The glint in his eyes turned mischievous as he continued to watch her squirm. “It was getting too hot for you anyhow. I wonder whether you’ll feel the same aftereffects the second time using the serum. What do you think, Dr. Kirkland?”
She sincerely hoped not, but there was no way to find out till afterwards. Dr. Kirkland obviously didn’t know that Heath knew about her “problem” that came with using the new serum as he proceeded with the usual explanation.
“The serum’s a bio-blocker, similar to what had been tested on certain pilots. It effectively removes the exhaustion that comes after remote viewing by manipulating one’s chemical balance. You can look at the ‘before and after’ charts, if you like,” he said. “When Helen is on it, she won’t feel sleepy or tired. Remember she didn’t feel any pain when she hurt her leg during the mission.”
Thank God Dr. Kirkland omitted the fact that once the serum wore off, her body had reacted by overreacting. Whatever she’d been lacking in her chemical makeup, her body had decided to overcompensate. And she suspected that Heath already knew what her body was overcompensating because of their encounter in the hot tub. It took all her concentration not to cross her legs under the sheets.
“I’m ready, Dr. K.,” she cut in, just in case Dr. Kirkland continued with too much information, keeping her eyes on Heath. She arched her brows at his knowing smile. “Give me enough so that I can stand up, brush my teeth, and make an intelligent report to my team, please. Also give me enough so my eyes are bright and my tail bushy too.”
Dr. Kirkland and Derek laughed at her sarcastic joke. Heath just pulled up a chair and sat down, his attention intently on Dr. Kirkland now.
“That’s what you should do to your avatar,” Derek said, with an evil grin, as he pulled the IV tray to Helen’s bedside. “Make Hades a squirrel.”
Helen blinked at the sudden ludicrous image that popped up in her mind and then laughed. “That,” she said, punching her pillow, “is a great idea. A giant squirrel yelling at me in virtual reality.”
“Does he yell?” Heath asked, his head cocked.
She extended her arm out to Dr. Kirkland. “Well, I guess not,” she replied. Yelling would make Jed McNeil human. “It’s supposed to be funny, Heath, you know…a joke. Jed McNeil as a loud quarrelsome squirrel. Come on, lighten up.”
“When the serum enters your system, do you find jokes like that funny?”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s supposed to stop your feeling fatigue and pain. Does it stop you from laughing? Would the laughing Hell become all serious and boring?” Heath fingered the IV bag. “This stuff is supposed to be so potent, it’s given to those on the war field to make them super soldiers.”
“It blocks fatigue and pain, but I certainly didn’t feel like I was the Terminator robot or something when I was on it.” Helen tried to explain it, then shrugged. “It’s a neuro-blocker, so it’s deceptive. For example, it made me forget to drink liquids because I didn’t feel thirsty, but that didn’t mean my body wasn’t thirsting for water. Alex was the one who brought that to my attention.”
“I see.”
The serum going in felt cold, then tingly. She felt it working. Already, the heavy tiredness was lifting. “You knew that, right, Heath? Didn’t you try the first serum?”
A few of the commandos had been tested with the first version of the bio-serum, but Helen didn’t know more than what Flyboy had told her. He had used it to test its effect on pilots, and he’d said he hadn’t felt more than a rush.
“No, I didn’t volunteer,” Heath answered.
“Heath was allergic to a synthetic element in that serum,” Dr. Kirkland explained, as he checked her pulse. He clicked on a little flashlight and Helen obediently lifted her head and looked up so he could shine the light into each eye. “Everything looks good. Now, remember your leg’s still hurting from yesterday’s incident even though you aren’t feeling the pain. Please don’t run and jump about and destroy all the work I put into getting it healed, Helen.”
“Yes, Dr. K.,” Helen said meekly. “It’s only a meeting, all sitting around and talking.”
“I heard there was a punching incident at a meeting yesterday,” Dr. Kirkland said. “Maybe I should amend that to ‘no wrestling matches’ during meetings.”
Helen turned to a grinning Derek. “Maybe I’ll have Dr. K. stand beside me to protect me from the big bad squirrels in there.”
Dr. Kirkland shook his head. “How am I ever going to get that image out of my head today?”
“It’s going to be one big bad squirrel you have to worry about. He knows you’re going to be there, all juiced-up,” Heath reminded her, his dark eyes still assessing her. “I’ve a feeling he might want to know why you aren’t resting.”
Helen lifted her chin. “Let him try being a sexist at a team meeting,” she announced. She felt wonderful, awake and ready for a fight. “Now let me get to my quarters and have a shower and some breakfast. We’ll see who’s bright-eyed and bushy-tailed then.”
Of course, it wasn’t quite fair that she needed some stupid bio-serum in her to be able to get out of bed and function like a normal human being, but she wasn’t going to go into trivial details like that. The rush of energy this second time gave her an unexpected urge to do some spontaneous cartwheels, something she liked doing when she was an over-energetic child. She snuck a glance at the doctor…okay, she’d better not run or jump around. She needed her leg to work properly when she was off the serum.
“Crazy juice,” she muttered, as she untangled her long legs from the sheets. It was already subtly working its odd magic. Usually, she’d stay under the covers till at least the room was clear of a few of the men. Right now, she didn’t care. The serum made modesty feel unnecessary.
Heath got out of his chair. “Interesting to watch,” he said, extending a hand to help her. “Now I’ll have to be there when Armando uses the serum, see whether there’s a difference.”
Helen didn’t make any objections. It was useless to point out that had she been a man, he wouldn’t even have entertained the thought of her needing his help to hop out of bed. These dudes were just going to have to get used to having a woman doing field work with them.
Unlike Jed, Heath emanated a subtle strength. Whenever she was by Jed, she always felt a bit wary, as if a wild animal were somewhere inside him, waiting to eat her up. With those smiling eyes, Heath appeared like a helpful choir boy. But, she reminded herself, he was the trained interrogator. It was noteworthy how the serum was expanding her analytical skills.
“News travels fast around here. Does everyone know Armando secretly used the serum?”
“Only those who need to know,” Heath said.
“Is he going to be punished?” she asked, curious. Jed hadn’t seemed particularly angry when he confronted Armando yesterday. But he did give very specific orders about staying at Medic to be tested.
“Punishment?” Heath finally smiled. “We aren’t in school, Hell. We don’t punish bad behavior. Endangering one’s team through bad decisions is the only thing that makes us lose our temper a little. No one wants to die from carelessness around here.”
The man made jokes with subtle threats. Helen mentally shook her head. On one hand, she knew her normal self would be making a sarcastic remark right now. Instead, her mind was busy computing and analyzing Heath as if he was a target. Dang if the serum wasn’t curbing her inner snark bunny.
***
Jed didn’t look up. He sensed the moment Elena entered the conference room. She hadn’t said a word, but he knew she was there. When he’d found out this morning that she was going to use the bio-serum, his initial reaction had been to countermand her decision. He’d stopped himself just in time, not only because he realized how extraordinary that move would seem to anyone, even to Dr. Kirkland, but also because his wanting to do so stemmed from personal reasons.
Preventing an operative from doing his or her job was alien to his nature. What Elena had decided to do made perfect sense as a responsible operative. The serum was to be used to alleviate the effects of remote viewing so she could perform her job at optimal capacity. She was the prime mover in their assignment; it was her right to be here to give a summary of what she’d seen during the remote-viewing session.
That he himself didn’t like the idea of her using the serum so soon after the first dosage shouldn’t be a reason to question her decision. But the image of that other remote viewer at Stratter’s haunted him. While Elena had been watching the curled-up man on the bed, he’d scanned the room, noting the medical trays and the IV bags. The set-up looked awfully familiar. He didn’t doubt that the CIA and other agencies had been testing their versions of a serum on their remote viewers; science and technology didn’t remain a secret for long, especially with the speed of email and spying technology these days. Those agencies were looking for their own super spy, and from this one instance, at least one remote viewer was negatively affected. Jed couldn’t prove whether it was the serum, the strange encounter with Elena and Armando, or some other outside interference, but that man didn’t look well at all.
He waited till she’d chosen her seat, listening for clues as he heard her greeting the others. She sounded pleasantly normal, but was she? He, as Number Nine, couldn’t countermand another operative just because he was worried for her welfare now, could he?
“How are you feeling?” he asked, still writing.
“Bright-eyed and bushy-tailed.”
Something inside Jed relaxed. That was a typical Elena smart-ass reply. He put down the pen and finally glanced up. He waited for the familiar thrum of desire that always kicked in whenever he looked at her. Having her around him in real life had only kicked up that in-the-gut feeling a notch.
There was something appealing to him about the way she always had messy hair. Even tied up, little wisps would escape, framing her face, hinting at the rebellious nature underneath. Right now it looked damp and spiky, as if she had been in a hurry.
She looked rested. The serum had also probably taken away the pain from her leg. There was a faint challenge in her body language, although her gaze was searching his coolly. He could think of several reasons, all of which were understandable, why she wanted to be here in person. She didn’t want to be some member of a team only good at one thing. She was curious to hear his explanation of what had happened in the crate. She’d brought up Stratter’s to T. because of the photo. He still wondered why he’d guided her to look for it on the wall. Maybe it was his perverse way of giving her a part of himself. His history at Stratter’s Pointe wasn’t something he shared with anyone.
The serum, he noted, had taken the edge off her anger. Knowing her, she should be frustrated by his manipulation of her mind and body all yesterday. Not that he had any regrets. He was honest enough to admit that he enjoyed every side of her. He had meant what he told her too, that in virtual reality, she was his, that he had to be the one in control. Last night, out there, when she was either hallucinating or seeing some kind of strange colors, he hadn’t seen anything out of the ordinary. He must be careful not to push too much because Elena pushed herself hard enough. His hand curled tightly around his pen.