I looked at my watch. The wedding was in a few hours and I needed to get my lazy self in gear and over to the church. I leaned over the railing and took one last luxurious sigh before the whirlwind of the day began. I knew there would be many familiar faces at the wedding, and I was excited to see most of them. Lanie had informed me that a good portion of the
Clean Slate
cast had been invited and planned to attend. It would almost be a mini reunion of sorts from the tour. I hadn’t seen Kyle or Georgette in forever and smiled at the thought of catching up with those guys. Sienna’s confirmation would make for an eventful evening of avoidance. However, I had no plans to revisit the conflicts of yesteryear. Today was about my friend and I wanted to keep it that way.
I tossed my bag into my rental car and hung my dress on a hook in the backseat. I wondered if Adrienne was already in town. I hadn’t seen her since the restaurant four weeks before and she’d not responded to the lone text message I’d sent her apologizing. My guess was she was still pissed and probably didn’t want anything to do with me. Hell, for all I knew, she and Kim had ridden off into the sunset together. I shook my head briskly in an effort to snap myself to attention. I needed to focus.
❖
I took a step back from Lanie and felt tears well up in my eyes as I took her in. I looked at her mother, who reached for my hand and squeezed, as she too was a wall of emotion. The three of us were alone in the bride’s room at the church and seeing Lanie in her dress for the first time took my breath away. She was a vision, full of hope, beauty, and everything a bride should be. She grinned back at us, but it was clear she was also feeling a little sentimental in this moment. She held up her hand to us in protest. “Stop it, both of you. My makeup’s done and I
cannot
cry. You have to suck it up, like immediately.”
We laughed at that and I pulled Lanie into a hug. “Thank you for asking me to be a part of this. If anyone belongs together, it’s you and Ben. You look beautiful, Lanie, simply stunning.”
I could feel Lanie fanning her face over my shoulder. “Now I really am going to cry. Damn you, McGovern.” But instead we laughed again and she released me from the embrace. “I’m glad you’re here too. I can’t wait for the day I get to attend your wedding.”
“Well, that will be a long wait. I’m not the type, I’m afraid.” “You used to be.”
“Yeah, well, that was another time and another place. People change.” I shrugged. “Besides, today is not about me, is it?”
“Nope. Today is all about me.” She grinned at herself in the mirror. “And I’m going to enjoy every second of it.”
Excitement was definitely in the air. There was an extra skip
in my step and I wished nothing but happiness for Lanie on this
beautiful day. If I had any fears or worries when I arrived at the church, they were gone now and replaced with optimism and hope. God, I sounded like a Disney character. But today was about love, and I think I needed a reminder that people could be happy. That realization was a step in the right direction, and I gave myself a proverbial pat on the back.
The string quartet began their arrangement of
Canon in D,
and as one who always knew how to make an entrance, I waited a few bars in before I left Lanie at the back of the church. With a final wink, I headed down the aisle. The modest sized sanctuary was practically overflowing with smiling faces. These two clearly had a lot of people who cared about them. I took my time as I processed down the short walkway leading to the altar and nodded subtly to those I knew. Craig blew me a kiss and Georgette beamed as we made eye contact. I sent her an “oh my God, it’s so great to see you” look as I passed. As my gaze settled on the next face, however, the room seemed to still as if programmed to do so. Adrienne wore a deep burgundy dress, the epitome of elegance and style. Her hair was partially swept up, and the remaining strands were curled into soft tendrils that hung loosely past her shoulders. Our eyes met and her lips parted slightly as she scanned the length of my dress. Was I imagining it, or was Adrienne checking me out? The next face I settled on answered my question succinctly. As Kim placed a hand possessively on Adrienne’s shoulder, I forced my eyes forward, concentrating on my destination.
The ceremony was short and sweet, but a tearjerker nonetheless. Luckily, I’d smuggled a handkerchief into the bouquet I carried and was well prepared. As the minister spoke of “everlasting commitment” and “the pledging of love to another,” I couldn’t help but steal glances in Adrienne’s direction. I thought of the younger, idealistic version of myself who had once wondered if Adrienne was “the one,” and realized sadly that she’d probably never gotten that far herself.
I looked on as the vows were exchanged and allowed myself the guilty pleasure of imagining what it would be like if things had been different, if we had ended up the way Lanie and Ben had. But
just as the wonderful images and sensations of that daydream began to flood my senses, they were interrupted by thunderous applause. Lanie and Ben had shared their first kiss as husband and wife and were now proceeding down the aisle.
That’s your cue, stupid.
Shaking myself awake, I graciously accepted the arm of the best man and made my way to the back of the church. I plastered a smile across my face, but inside I was trembling. The combination of the minister’s words, the utter happiness on Lanie’s face, and Adrienne sitting not so far away with her date was enough to seriously mess with my mind. I silently hoped the reception had an open bar.
❖
Small, twinkling white lights cascaded from the high ceiling of the Plaza Club’s ballroom, and white table linens adorned with elegant purple hydrangea centerpieces helped set the swanky mood at the post-wedding gala. A sextet jazz band played ambient music from the edge of the dance floor and an ice sculpture of two swans with intertwining necks held court in the center of the room. I looked around in awe and appreciation. The floor to ceiling second story windows offered a gorgeous view of the sun setting on the water. Many of the guests were mingling on the wrap-around deck, as the cool sea breeze floated in around them. The place looked amazing and I could only imagine how much Lanie’s parents were shelling out for the affair.
As the wedding party arrived, the reception moved into full swing. Guests milled about chatting and sipping champagne that waiters whisked about on silver trays. There was a line to sign the guest book and a small group of children dipped strawberries into the chocolate fountain. However, as the bride and groom were officially announced, the entire room came to attention and clapped, cheered, and congratulated the newly married couple.
I checked on Lanie, bringing her and Ben each a glass of champagne. But as they made their way through the crowd to speak individually to their guests, I took advantage of the opportunity and snuck away to catch my breath. I stole a glass of champagne for
myself and moved to the outer edge of the room away from the crowd, eventually wandering out onto the deck. The cool air was a welcome distraction. I found a spot at the railing, smiling at guests I didn’t recognize as I passed. I sipped my drink and stared out at the water lapping against the stilts of the building. I reverted to breathing exercises I had learned in college to calm my nerves and get my mind to slow down. So many thoughts were racing through it. I was twenty-seven years old and already resigned to a life spent on my own. Until recently, I was okay with that. In fact, it’s what I’d purposefully chosen for myself, focusing fully on my career and how to maximize each opportunity. But on such a happy day for my friend, I was sad for myself and for who I’d become. I tightened my grip on the railing and focused on the horizon.
“Penny for your thoughts,” Adrienne said. Her eyes sparkled in the diminishing sunlight.
“Oh, they’re much more expensive than that, I’m afraid.” “Damn it, I left my purse in the car.”
“A rain check?”
“That’ll do, I suppose.” She smiled cautiously, clearly not sure how to proceed. “It’s beautiful out here.”
“Yeah, Lanie’s lucky to have gotten such wonderful weather.
This sky is like something out of a book.”
She turned and studied the sunset, before eventually shifting back to me. “So I guess we should talk about it.”
“Probably.” I turned to face her fully. “I was a jerk. I’m sorry.” “You
were
a jerk,” she said. “A big jerk.”
“And if I could go back in time and change what I did, I would.” “All of it?” she asked quietly.
Kim chose that exact moment to make her way onto the deck, carrying a glass of wine in each hand. White wine. I suppressed the urge to roll my eyes and instead smiled widely, an earnest attempt to show Adrienne how I was capable of social maturity. I was just happy she was speaking to me again. Yes, I was falling for her, but after a month without her entirely, I’d give anything to go back to where we were before the dinner from hell. Simply put, I’d desperately missed her. Kim would be no problem if I could just
secure Adrienne in my life in some way. The long stretch of silence from her had easily shown me that.
“Hi, Kim. You look great.” And she did too. She wore a one- shouldered yellow evening gown with a crisscrossed bodice. Leave it to the girl in fashion to show us all up.
“Thank you. It’s good to see you again, Jenna. You’re turning quite a few heads in that dress yourself.”
I shrugged and looked skyward, an attempt at vain humor. It worked and they laughed.
“Are you two staying for the weekend?” I asked. “I rented a cottage on the shore until Tuesday. If you’re going to stick around, you should come by. We could grill a few hotdogs.”
“That could be fun,” Adrienne said. “We just might take you up on that. Kim made reservations for us at the Yacht Club through Sunday. We thought we might check out the area. You know,” she said, looking from one of us to the other, “it’s strange, but all these years I’ve lived in New York and I haven’t spent much time in the Hamptons at all. It’s nice to have the weekend free to explore, relax.” “I’m looking forward to it,” Kim said. But she seemed distracted and eyed something through the window. “If you two will excuse me for a moment, I think I see an associate I used to work with at Bergdorf’s. Small world. Jenna, you don’t mind keeping my
date company for a few moments, do you?”
“Of course not,” I said and she was gone. Left alone on the deck, Adrienne and I smiled shyly at one another, still feeling each other out after the fight…and the make out session. “She really does seem great. Kim.”
“I’m not sure you really feel that way, but it’s nice of you to say. I know she didn’t make the best impression on you, but once you get to know her, she’s a fascinating person. I think you two would hit it off if you gave her a chance.”
“I’m sure that’s true, and I will,” I said quietly. But I wasn’t listening as intently as I should have been because of the way Adrienne’s hair fell across her forehead. It was my natural instinct to run my fingers through it, smooth it aside affectionately. Somehow, that wouldn’t have been appropriate in the given situation.
Adrienne must have sensed my distraction. We looked at each other, not quite sure where to go. She took a sip of wine and I looked back out over the water.
“So I hear congratulations are in order.” She seemed to be doing her best to steer us back on course. “I know it hasn’t been announced yet, but a little bird told me you’re doing
Elevation
. I couldn’t believe the way it played out. That’s probably the best casting story I’ve ever heard. I’m so happy for you. You’re going to be awesome.”
All of a sudden I was excited all over again. Adrienne’s enthusiasm was definitely contagious. “You’re the reason it all came together, you know. I owe you one.”
She shook her head. “For the record, I may have given the casting director your name, Jenna, but he’s the one I was doing the favor for. You’re the catch, not him.”
It meant a lot to me to hear her say that. “Thank you for believing in me when I was skeptical. I just can’t express how it feels to have everything come together like this.”
Resignation flickered behind her eyes. “Everything happens
for a reason.”
“I guess it does.” I felt that familiar, wistful lump in my throat. “So have you had a chance to talk with everyone, the old
crowd?” she asked.
“I haven’t and I’ve been looking forward to seeing those guys all day. Are they here?”
“Yep, they grabbed a table to the right of the cake. You should go say hi.”
“I think I will.” I pushed off the railing and moved toward the door. “Coming?” I asked, looking back.
“You know what? You go on ahead. I’m going to take in this view for a few more minutes.” She turned back to the setting sun, and the image of her at that railing stopped me in my tracks. I made a point to memorize the visual of her body, partially silhouetted by the pinks and oranges of the colorful sky and the water glistening below. She was a vision if I’d ever seen one, and I felt a warmth flood my body.
Stop right there, Tiger.
Somewhat dazed, I made my way to the bar and ordered myself a vodka martini, vowing this would be my last drink of the evening. After all, I was here for Lanie and wanted to be responsible and available for anything she needed. I scanned the crowd, locating her speaking with an older couple across the room. Meeting my eyes, she offered the thumbs up signal, the sign we’d agreed upon earlier for “everything’s great.” I nodded my understanding and moved through the room in hopes of finding my old friends. It didn’t take long.
As my eyes met Georgette’s, we both let out a squeal. She threw her arms around me and I stumbled backward, laughing all the while. “Georgie, I’ve missed you!”
“I know. We don’t get together enough. I blame you, even though it’s my fault. What’s new?”
“Not much. I just wrapped a film,
Phase Two
, and I’m looking for what’s next. Are you still with
Mamma Mia
in New York?
“Negative. I’m tired of chorus work, sister. I want to get in with Rory Lynden’s new show,
Elevation
. Very dance heavy. I’ve heard they’ve already found their lead, but the show comes with some nice supporting roles and I have a callback audition in a week and a half. Cross your fingers for me.”