Wellington Cross (Wellington Cross Series) (11 page)

The sitting room sofa and chairs had a dark burgundy velvet
material, as well as the drapes on the three windows of the room.  Two
windows faced the carriage drive, while the other window faced the bachelor’s
quarters.  The walls of the room were a pale pink color, giving the room a
warm feeling.  An oil lamp was lit on a big table between the two chairs,
and another was lit on top of the piano.

 Clarissa sat on the sofa and patted for me to sit next to
her.  “Come sit next to me, Madeline.  It’s so good to have you back
with us again.”  I sat where she directed, placing Lillie on my lap. 
Elizabeth sat in one of the chairs on the opposite side of the fireplace,
looking forlorn and disinterested.  Cora served us hot tea and some more
bread with strawberry jam, served on chipped blue and white china. 

“Mm, that jam looks delicious, Miss Cora,” I said.  “Thank
you.”  She bowed politely, smiling.  “Are there strawberries nearby?”
I asked Clarissa.

“Yes, as a matter of fact, your brother Jonas grows them. 
He sent some over here just last week.  Miss Cora, this looks absolutely
delicious,” she said, directing her attention to Cora.  “Are you finding
everything you need in the kitchen?”

“Oh yes, ma’am.  Everything is just fine, ma’am.”  She
left the room still smiling.

Clarissa talked to me mostly, as Elizabeth sat looking at us,
stewing, forcing a smile from time to time.  Lillie also remained quiet,
content to sit on my lap and suck on her fingers, licking off some strawberry
jam from the little bit I had given her.

I told Ethan’s mother that I would like to make myself useful
around the house and asked her what I could do to occupy my time.  “I
worked in the gardens on the Washingtons’ farm.” 

“You could help out in our small family garden, if you’d like
to.”

“Yes, I would,” I told her.

“Cora and the girls will now be taking care of the cooking and
gathering all the kitchen supplies and do some of the cleaning that Elizabeth
has still been doing.”

“Yes,” Elizabeth chimed in.  “I’m so very grateful to you
for bringing new servants to the house, Madeline.  That will give me more
time to spend with my husband.”

“Now Elizabeth,” Clarissa said.  “You know that Madeline
here was married to Ethan before, and since she’s lost her memory, she is the
one who needs to spend time with him, to get her memory back.”   

I looked over at Elizabeth, whose face turned red with anger and
probably embarrassment.  “Yes, ma’am,” she said quietly.  She looked
at me with contempt.

“And of course, you can spend some time with little Lillie Rose,
as well,” Clarissa said softly to me, patting Lillie on the arm.  “It’s so
wonderful to see how quickly she has taken to you.  She must know you’re
her mama.”  I smiled at the thought and looked down at Lillie.

She continued talking about the garden.  “Our vegetable
garden has corn, potatoes, carrots, peas, blackberries, pumpkins, and we have a
small patch of lavender.  You could help with weeding and gathering ripe
vegetables and fruits for Cora if you really wanted to do something. 
Don’t feel obligated to do anything, though.  We want you to work on
getting your memory back.”

“I’d be happy to help out.  I enjoy working in the garden.”

I thought about Elizabeth’s earlier comment about wanting to
spend more time with Ethan, and my heart hurt.  I wished she didn’t feel
that way.  It made it harder for me to not feel guilty about wanting to
spend time with him myself.  Perhaps gardening would be a nice distraction
to occupy myself while Ethan was working out in the fields or whatever it was
he did.  I really didn’t know what he did and wondered if he had other
obligations outside the plantation. 

“What does Ethan do around here?  When I met him this
morning, he’d been working out in the fields.”

“Yes, he does work out in the fields.  We don’t have slaves
anymore and barely any hired hands to help us.  We used to grow tobacco
before the war, but the land wasn’t much fit to grow tobacco on anymore, either
because of it getting trampled on during the war or because the land was just
worn out.  Ethan and the hired brothers tried after the war, but it just
wouldn’t take.  So we’re trying cotton now, which we’ve had better success
with.  It has taken the whole year to get a decent-sized crop
growing.  Ethan and his father take the cotton to the marketplace here in
Charles City County, across the river to City Point, and also down to
Williamsburg to sell it in the fall.”  She paused to take a sip of tea.

“Ethan also keeps the book of sales, and he handles the hired
men, sharecroppers, and house servants, which now includes Cora and the
girls.  We’re going to need more help this summer as the cotton gets close
to harvest time.  Ethan’s father has given him more responsibilities since
the war.  Poor Edward was shot in the leg during the war and had to have
the lower half of it removed.  He uses a partial wooden leg, which you may
have noticed, so he’s not able to get around like he used to.”

“What does my brother Jonas do, besides grow strawberries?” I
asked her next.

“Jonas has continued to grow corn just as your father had
started before the war.  He also has a small vegetable garden to eat out
of along with strawberries.  He works awful hard, does it all himself,
doesn’t have any servants.  Ethan helps him out some when he can. 
We’d hoped to tell him about finding you, but Jake rode over there this
afternoon and said he wasn’t home.  He was going to Orange to visit Lucy’s
family, though I thought he might be home by now.  Lucy was the girl he
was going to marry, do you remember?”

I shook my head.  “Ethan told me what happened to her.”

“It’s very sad.  Perhaps he will be home tomorrow. 
I’ll have Jake ride back over there and leave a letter for Jonas that you are
here.”

“Tell me about your sister,” I said.  “Did I know her?”

“Catherine?  Yes, you had seen her a few times but not
often.  As a matter of fact, when I was just there to see her, after I met
you in Chester, I told her about you and your accident.  She told me she
thought she’d seen you at a party on New Year’s Eve.  Is that possible?”

That was Clarissa’s sister?  “Oh, well, I did go to a
party, yes, in Bellwood.  I didn’t know your sister was there.”  I
still didn’t want to tell her about Jefferson just yet.  I wondered if
Catherine had told her about Jefferson kissing me.

“She wasn’t sure if it was you or not, but it sounds like it
was.  She didn’t mention it in our correspondence, so I didn’t know about
it until I went over to visit her this week.  Like I said, she may be
losing her house and may have to come here to live.  Edward doesn’t know
that yet, but I’ll tell him about that later.  She has a daughter. 
Her husband died during the war.” 

“I noticed Lillie drinking milk.  Do you have cows here?”

“No.  We used to have sheep before the war.  Some
neighbors of ours, the parishioner, Reverend O’Loughlin, and his wife, have a
small herd of Guernseys.  We used to trade eggs for milk.  I was so
glad to see you bringing hens along with you, Madeline.  We need
those.  A fox got our last hen a fortnight ago.  Hopefully we’ll get
some more eggs.  Jake and Zeke will have to repair our chicken coop. 
The fox made somewhat of a mess.

We were quiet for a moment, while I finished drinking my tea,
and then Clarissa touched my arm.  “I have a wonderful idea.  Why
don’t we have a special dinner in honor of your return?  Just a simple
gathering among the neighboring families, maybe a little music and
dancing?  I’ll have to see if the fiddle player, John Goodson, is
available.  Perhaps seeing other people would help trigger your memory.
 I think Saturday evening would be a good day.  Would that be all
right with you?”  I nodded.  “I’ll go and tell the gentlemen.”

Elizabeth didn’t look too thrilled with the idea.  She had
a frown on her face, which she didn’t try to hide.  We got up to follow
Clarissa, but Elizabeth caught my arm first. 

“If you think I’m just going to step aside and let you take
Ethan away from me, you’re dead wrong.” 

I stood there holding Lillie with my jaw hung down as Elizabeth
walked down the hall toward the dining room.  I wasn’t feeling sorry for
her anymore.  If she wanted a fight, I’d give her one.  I had every
right to be here.

I was still standing there when Ethan came into the room looking
for me.  I heard the others’ voices drift away, as they retired to the
floor above. 

“Madeline?  Are you all right?”  As he walked across
the room to me, I began to feel my heart beat faster with excitement. 

“Yes, I’m fine.  Sorry, I was just thinking about the party
your mother wants to have.  Did she tell you?”

“Yes, and I think that would be perfect,” he said, smiling at me
intently.  The thought of dancing with him made my heart skip a beat.

He walked close to me and took Lillie Rose carefully from my
arms.  “I’ll take her upstairs with me,” he said softly, draping her
across one shoulder.  I could smell the sweet-scented tobacco from the
pipe he had been smoking.  It smelled vaguely familiar, and I felt
immediately drawn to him.  He smelled like home.

“I’m really glad you chose to stay with us.  I hope you won’t
regret it.”  He smiled at me sweetly and took one of my hands in his and
kissed it gently.  “I hope that this will give us another chance to be
together,” he said, pulling my hand towards his heart.  I could feel his
heart beating fast beneath his soft cotton shirt.  I had to close my eyes
for a moment, as I breathed in his scent.  He continued, “I know you don’t
remember me as a grown man, but I hope that you will grow to care about me as
much as I do you.” I opened my eyes again, and he was looking into mine, still
holding my hand.  I felt like a frog had leaped into my throat.  I
couldn’t speak.

“I know it’s easy to love a child, especially one as sweet and
beautiful as our Lillie Rose here, but I hope that you will also come to care
about me, as well, more than just the friendship we had as children.  I
don’t know how much of the past you will come to remember, but whatever
happens, I am willing to accept it.  If you don’t get the rest of your
memory back and decide you don’t want me as a husband, then I will regretfully
accept that, too.”  His voice broke at those last words, and he cleared
his throat. 

I didn’t know what to say and didn’t seem to be able to speak,
so I just nodded my head in acknowledgement and smiled.  He let go of my
hand then and held out his arm to escort me upstairs.  I joined my arm
with his, my heart beating faster as our arms touched, and we walked up the
staircase to my room where he said goodnight.  Once inside his old room, I
wished so much that I could remember the grown-up Ethan, and wondered what our
lives had been like together in this house as husband and wife.  I was
determined to remember, or else have great enjoyment making new memories with
him.  Regardless of what Elizabeth thought about it.

I awoke to the sound of dogs barking and for a moment was
disoriented.  I sat up, looked around the room, and then realized where I
was.  Wellington Cross.  I thought about everything that had happened
yesterday, from waking up at Oakworth, which had been destroyed by fire, to
traveling with a woman I didn’t remember, meeting the man who claimed to have
been my husband, who was also my childhood friend I remembered in my dreams,
finding out I also had a daughter, and adjusting to a new family, a new
life. 

It seemed strange to be living around people who knew you
before, but you still didn’t know that person they knew, the grown-up
Madeline.  Even the dogs remembered me.  When was I going to
remember?  I felt more pressure being around people who knew me than I did
when I stayed with the Washingtons.  It was a little overwhelming.

I smiled thinking about Ethan.  I didn’t remember him as
this man I saw, but instead as a little child running around, getting into
mischief with me and my brother.  But the man I did see made me have
grown-up thoughts.  There was definitely an undercurrent of attraction
between us.  He genuinely still seemed to care about me and wanted to help
me remember who I had grown up to be, and find out if I still cared for
him.  It warmed my heart.  There was evidence that we had loved each
other, and I felt connected to him; and because we had loved each other, a
daughter had resulted. 

Lillie Rose.  Such a sweet little baby girl.  She made
me want to be a mother.  I was already becoming attached to her, and I
didn’t know how I could live without her again and hoped I wouldn’t have
to.  I’d missed so much of her life already.

I was startled by a knock at the door and quickly put on a
scarlet dressing gown from the clothing of my past life.  Ethan was on the
other side of the door with a grin on his face and a single red rose in his
hand.  His grin faded, and he seemed speechless for a moment, looking at
my disheveled hair and what I was wearing.  I pulled the dressing gown
closer around me, imagining that he must be having his own flashes of memories
of us being intimate, perhaps of the last time he had seen me wearing this
dressing gown.

He came to himself again and cleared his throat, forcing himself
to look at my face.  “I hope I didn’t wake you,” he said softly.