Wench With Wings (24 page)

The next month goes pretty much as expected of a
new
relationship. As much as it could with an unknown-to-everyone kind of relationship that is. Trey’s still a bit freaked so other than the close friends, no one really knows about her and Ayden; per her request. They don’t flaunt it in public. Sometimes she lets him sneak in a kiss to her cheek, but that’s pretty much as far as it goes. He don’t like it and it has brought a bit of jealousy to light, but they pretty much manage a good
new
balance; even with the hurt she brings upon the both of them for it.

The first fight night they were together was quite hard on Ayden. He was a complete mess from the second he got the text and saw that Trey was in the lineup and would be fighting. He was afraid she would still take the guy back to her place, but instead she took him; to his relief. What was expected anyway? When she made her way out to the hot tub with the bottle of Jack and a joint he was a bit thrown off. He didn’t know she smoked. He was upset, but he didn’t show it to her. The tension was strung tight that night and not because of that. He didn’t want to really know what she did to those guys she brought home, but he just had to ask if what she was doing was what she did with them. She told him no and that she would not tell him about it, but maybe show him someday. Of course after she assured him that she would no longer be extending her gifts to anyone else other than him. Instead of what she would normally do, she let him behind her.

That night also became the night of
exclusive.
She was a little worried about him still taking women home, obviously he was, she knew it, so they agreed they would no longer be that person they once were without each other. Neither one did ask why each one did it, even though they both wanted to know. It was more of a secret that should never be told; it showed their weakness with the need of love involved.

The time spent was worth a pretty penny; okay it just went great; she would do his tat and they would run together every night but the weekend, every now and then they would study around each other or at least until they couldn’t help, but to touch each other. They went out on dates with Dane and Jocelyn, yes the best friend with the others best friend; they were exclusive and out in the open. They were still discrete when they went out with them; only slipping a quick touch without any notice to anyone else. Dane starting coming to the shop for tats and they would both come early for a good home cooked meal, some nights. They all went to the bar often for drinks and to hang out. They danced together, but still no one could tell they were actually together,
together
.

College was going good, dating was going good, the fights were going good and their work was going good. Life was on a high that Trey and Ayden never thought it would ever be. Sometimes they slept alone, but not very often at all. They mostly stayed at Treys because of Dane and Jos, but he had to have her in his bed some nights too. It assured her and made it easy for him to keep her longer which he loved to do to drive her crazy. They still had their fun, their teasing that no one could see dying down, they were perfect for it and played well together.

Halloween was a disaster and their first real fight since they got together. The night started off good. She got ready with the girls at her place, she was going as a butterfly just for him. He told her the night before she went out to get a costume about his tat she first did and that it became about her. She was in her glory with the fact that he thought so highly of her even the first night they met. She realized then that she did have certain feelings for him the second he walked into her shop not when he sat down.

She still hasn’t figured out if she can love him, but she knew that she was crazy for him and wanted to spend every second with him she could. He didn’t mind not being told by her that she loved him, but just her not throwing him away was good enough for him. She knew that he still didn’t know about her past, but he also hasn’t looked at her different ‘yet’ she would think when she thought to tell him about herself before who she was now, especially with him.

The girls all left happy for the Halloween party that was at one of the frat houses that they held fights at. They were going to meet the boys there, but when they walked in a girl was all over Ayden and he wasn’t pushing her away. Trey was a bit thrown at how jealous she actual was; how possessive she became at that moment. She didn’t like the feeling at all and she got hammered instead, hoping to block it all out. Guys wound up hanging around her looking for a piece of ass and Ayden couldn’t do anything about the fury that was building every time she smiled then looked over at him. He knew that she saw the girl all over him when she first walked in, but he didn’t know what to do about it or that she would purposely hurt him because of it.

He liked that it could be that, it meant that she knew he was hers, but he also didn’t like her hurt at all. It wasn’t like he could just go to her and put his arm around her to show everyone he was taken, she made sure of that. He couldn’t go to her when guys were hanging around her and tell them to back off that she was his because at this point he really wasn’t sure if it was true. He knew that he was hers, but she still hasn’t given him her yet, not completely anyway. He was a complete mess; she was a complete mess and it only escalated. Finally he snapped when a guy put his hand on her lower back just barely touching her ass and she let him without moving. He stormed over to her and grabbed her by the wrist and towed her outside.

“What the hell, Trey?”

“Oh what, you can touch girls, but guys can’t touch me?”

“It wasn’t like that for one and for another it’s your fault anyway.”

“Oh, Oh. How is it my fault that girls are all over you and you
let
them?”

“So, you just did all that with those guys to get back at me? Really Trey? If it worried you so much you should have just walked over and put your arm around me and told her I was taken.”

“
You
could have just told her that.”

“I did then she asked where
my girl
was and I couldn’t just tell her that she was over there staring us down because that
you
don’t want. You don’t want to be
my girl.
You don’t want people to know that were together. I don’t like it, I respect it, but shit you need to expect that women are going to throw themselves at me because they think I’m available. And that
honny
is not my fault”

“I have to
expect
it? Why because you can’t just push them away. I mean come on you’re a guy, a horny college guy that can’t handle not wanting every girl in sight. Figures, you fit right in with the social ‘norm.’
And
I am
not your girl.
I am mine and I am no possession.”

“Oh, trust me I know that
all
too well and seriously, I fit in. Come on Trey don’t you think that’s a bit ridiculous coming from the
girl
that won’t admit she has a man. Won’t admit she’s in love with him. Yea, everyone you let see it, sees it, but you. Funny how that works, right?”

That comment sure did set her off. He told her that she didn’t have to love him and yet here it is getting thrown in her face. She was pissed.

“I
don’t
have a man and I
can’t
love so how can anyone see it if it is not possible. You knew that, so who’s the one that can’t accept? Fuck you Ayden.” She spun to storm off. That was completely it for her. She was done. He knew he was wrong and yet still he was completely pissed. He wanted her to
love him
, to show everyone that he is hers and that
she is his.
Yea, he accepted it
at first
and for the past couple months, but hot god damn was he still pissed. He wanted it and she acted like she wanted it also yet she would not just give in and give him her heart. She ignored his pain like it meant nothing.

They didn’t talk for a couple days, but then neither one of them could handle being separated from the other. They started walking to each other’s house and wound up meeting in the middle. No words were spoken for the first few minutes they held each other. It was an unspoken vow to never be apart again. He said sorry and that he loves her and he hoped that she would say it too, but she only said sorry. It crushed him, but he
did
already know that she supposedly
can’t
love him and he did kind of see it in her eyes at times. He didn’t understand it and he didn’t know why, but he also couldn’t ask her for the answer, for some reason he knew that it would make her push him away and that he would not be able to handle whatever it is, so he sucked it up and accepted it once again. Moving on to just loving her every second he could and trying to get her to do the same.

The following weeks went by good. They both knew that her not being able to love put a barrier in their relationship, but they both had fun while he loved up on her anyway. Neither one could get enough of the other.

Thanksgiving break came and they spent every second with each other. Their group stuck around and Trey and the girls cooked. It was a night for both of them that meant more to them then each other really knew. Trey did know that Ayden didn’t really have parents, but she didn’t know the extent on how bad Thanksgiving really did him in. He never had a turkey or anything like that. He was lucky if he had any dinner at all, even on that day of feasting. She could tell that there was something up with him. He was showing her more love then normal in front of their friends. She also saw the way Dane would look at him like he was making sure that Ayden was okay. She wanted to push for answers, she wanted to know him better, but she also knew that it would bring him memories that he would probably not like; the same as her, just forgetting the past and moving forward. Fuck it and fuck them, right?

The day was wondrous and the night was even better. He was pretty sure that she was trying her hardest to make sure that he knew she was more than just crazy about him. He really wanted her to tell him on that night that she loved him and it bothered him she didn’t; it would have made for the perfect day. But it would not kill the greatness he felt at finally having spent a Thanksgiving the way it was supposed to be; around people who cared and with great food. It was the first time in his life he really felt settled about who he was. If he could just get Trey to stay by his side for the rest of his life then he could do anything else to keep on going the path he was going on. A path to who he always wanted to be. A path in which it brought Trey in his life as his destiny or so he wanted to believe it badly; but still she would not give her heart.

The next day they took a road trip for the rest of vacation to get away and enjoy their break. It felt like a honeymoon to both of them. Most of the time was spent locked up in hotel rooms all over each other. Fancy dinners, decadent desserts that were licked from each other’s bodies, breakfast in bed and lunch still close together. She would squeeze in close to him in the same booth when they ate instead of sitting across from him like some kind of business meeting. He enjoyed eating more than he ever had, even after he starved for days. He also loved her more for not eating like one of those girls afraid to eat in front of a guy, she practically out ate him, which only made him smile more.

They never took their hands off of each other. That’s what got him most, was that she was all over him in public. Yea, people didn’t know them where they were, but it still made him love her that much more. It felt great to have her on his arm and she sure did like it too, maybe a little too much. They dreaded going back to college and not being able to do so. He wished that she would finally let them be close in front of everyone, but his wish didn’t really come true.

At first she kept a bit more distance then usual and when he asked her why she told him that she was afraid that she wouldn’t be able to control herself and that she would have to touch him. He smiled. He didn’t really like it, but he still smiled; she really wanted to be close to him. He was a little closer to taking her walls down completely and that just excited him and made him push more. Yea, he wanted them to crash down as quickly as possible, but he knew that all good things need to be disassembled so that you could save the good parts without complete destruction. He didn’t want her destruction, he just wanted her love more and more every second. He knew that she would have to save some of her walls to make her feel protected. He could protect her, but he knew she would want to also do it herself at times.

The next couple weeks they were cramming for finals and didn’t get to spend as much time together, but they both knew how much it meant for the other to be successful. When their last final was over they stayed at Trey’s and didn’t leave for two days. She even closed up shop to give her full attention and every second to Ayden. She missed him and he was ecstatic about it. The crack grew deeper.

All their friends and anyone that would see them together would say that they were both in crazy love with each other, yet she still didn’t believe it. She didn’t think she was capable at all. At some points she would question herself about it, but then she would be reminded at how much she truly hated the only man that she
should
have unconditionally loved but didn’t. At some points he was for sure that she loved him that he could see it in her eyes or feel it in her touch, but he truly wasn’t sure, he needed the words. She would never say it. Yea, it disappointed him and hurt him, but he would push it back to love her that much more with the reminder that someday she would love him; he would make her.