Where I Wanna Be (13 page)

Read Where I Wanna Be Online

Authors: Vera Roberts

Tags: #Literature & Fiction, #United States, #African American, #Romance, #Multicultural & Interracial

 


If you want me, if you
really
want me…” Faith began.

 


Go on.”

 


You will wait until I’m ready.” She said with a bit of authority in her voice.

 


You’re telling me something I already know.” Eli shrugged.

 


You can’t be with anyone else, though.” She was quick to point out. “I’m not sucking on something that’s been inside someone else.”

 

His future wife had fire and Eli already loved it. “I’m perfectly capable of being faithful, Faye.” Eli reassured.

 

Faith still wasn’t sure about Eli. He sounded just like the other ones before him, promising to wait and sometime around the three-month mark, they were begging for a hand job. “What if I want you to wait three years?” She asked.

 


Then I’ll have some big-ass arms,” he shrugged.

 


What if I proposition you when I’m drunk and grinding on you?” She asked.

 


I’ll enjoy the lap dance.” Eli smiled.

 

Faith thought quickly. “What if the world was falling apart and the only way we could save it is by you sleeping with me before I was ready?”

 


And wow, you have a really active imagination.” Eli laughed.

 

Faith grabbed both of Eli’s hands and looked into his eyes. “I know I’m being silly and what-not, but my virginity is the only thing I’ll have once, and that’s it. I want to be sure that the person I’ll give it to is worthy of it.”

 


What about premarital sex and all that?” Eli knew he was playing with fire, messing around with the daughter of a famous preacher. He could already predict the whispers and rumors that would follow them both. Eli would have to be on his best behavior, not out of respect for Faith, but for her family reputation. The thought of doing so was a heavy weight on his shoulders. “Assuming you’re talking about us having it before?”

 


I was taught it was best to wait until marriage, but I’m also a realist. I would rather wait until I’m in love with someone and see a possible future with him.” She quietly replied.

 


Do you see a future with me?” He asked.

 

Faith thought about how much she wanted to reveal to Eli. That she had already picked out a name for their first son? That she started scribbling Mrs. Faith D’Amato on her notebooks? That she was eager to learn a little Italian? That she hoped their children would have the smoothness of his tawny skin with a mixture of her features? She softly sighed and decided to reveal, once and for all how, she felt about him, but the words were lodged in her throat. “I… I… I.”

 

Eli focused on the soft moisture of Faith’s lips, begging him to kiss them. His lips brushed against hers a couple times, silently asking for entry. When Faith opened her mouth to accommodate, Eli devoured her lips. His tongue swept the inside of her mouth, playing with the rough smoothness of her tongue as Faith softly moaned into his mouth.

 

Damn.
Just hearing her soft moans turned Eli on. He trailed his lips down to her neck and soon found out that was her spot as her back arched and she willingly gave him more access. She tasted like honey and vanilla. He imagined if her neck tasted that sweet, the rest of her body was going to make him addicted.

 

He wanted to explore her body from the softness of her breasts to the heat between her thighs. He found his hands wandering towards the direction of her thighs and quickly stopped himself. Instead, Eli wrapped his arms around her as she writhed and squirmed with desire, softly breathing his name and not being able to control her desires. His cock twitched underneath his jeans, begging for release. If it was one of the hood-rats he had dated before, she would already be riding him until his cock was raw.

 

Faith was a good girl. She wasn’t a whore. She wasn’t easy. Even though she wanted him at that moment and he probably could’ve taken advantage of her, he wasn’t going to. It was more than that she was a virgin; she wanted him to be her first and only. Eli couldn’t explain it, but he felt the same way. He wanted to be the
only
one Faith would ever be with. He felt something fiercely territorial about it.

 

Faith on was another planet, her head softly shaking from side to side and her eyes fluttering between coherency and orgasmic mindlessness. It seemed the more he kissed her neck, the more inexplicable sounds came out of her mouth. Guttural. Feral. Intoxicated. Eli’s lips were magnetic. They were dangerous. They were powerful. They set her body aflame and she wanted to drink more from his cup. She never imagined her first kiss would be so erotic. She never imagined it would have her tingling down to her core. She already felt the slight dampness of her panties and was eager to continue.

 

Just when Faith was about to suggest they go to a hotel, Eli reluctantly broke away from her so he would be able to stop before he couldn’t. Breathing hard, he cupped Faith’s face within his hands and touched heads with her. “Again, Faye,
anima mia
…” Eli began. “…do you see a future with me?”

 


Eli,” Faith’s voice came out as a moan, “I see
everything
with you.”

 


In that case,” he gave her another searing kiss, “I’ll wait for when you’re ready.”

 
Five
 

Faith looked around the family dinner table at the D’Amato house. She had been around big meals before, hosting many church gatherings at her family’s home and at other venues. There was always plenty of food for the guests and their second and third helpings. But what she witnessed with the food at the D’Amato house was something out of fantasy.

 

Dishes upon dishes of food seemingly appeared out of nowhere. A large bowl of spaghetti was on her left. A large dish of eggplant parmesan was on her right. Several small bowls of meatballs were set in a circular fashion. A medium-sized bowl full of salad with fresh mozzarella and spinach was ahead of her. Two long pieces of Italian bread were chopped up and served in other bowls, with butter. Iced tea and wine were the beverages of choice and it was expected that everyone finish off their plate.

 

Faith stared down at her plate and wondered if her new boyfriend was secretly trying to make her fat. She didn’t even want to think about dessert.

 


Faith, I’m glad you came to dinner and brought your parents along as well,” Nicola smiled at Faith and her parents. “I would like to ask the Reverend if he would do the honor of blessing our food tonight.”

 

David stood up. “I would like for everyone to gather hands. Heavenly Father, we come before you in grace and humility on this day. We’d like to thank you for this food that’s going to provide nourishment for our bodies. We’d like to thank you for the company of the D’Amato family for hosting. We also thank you for watching over the relationship of our children, blessing them with the purity of their souls and bodies. In Your Name, we pray. Amen.”

 

Eli and Faith looked at each other and smiled. “Your dad really doesn’t want me touching you at all, I take it?”

 


My daddy is just a little over-protective, that’s all.” Faith reassured.

 

Eli remembered the not-so subtle threat Dave gave him before the first date, just six months earlier. “If he wasn’t a preacher, we wouldn’t be dating.” Eli commented.

 


True,” Faith nodded, “but he also sees the good in you.”

 


What good is that?”

 


Well,” Faith grabbed a little pasta on her fork, “you’re still alive.”

 

After dinner, Eli and Faith went out to the backyard to admire his mother’s burgeoning garden. He pointed the different types of flowers to Faith, though he was a little sketchy on some of them. “This is what I’m doing with my mom when I’m not at school or work,” he shrugged, “gardening.”

 


You seem to know a lot about flowers.” Faith smiled.

 


Not by choice,” Eli added, “definitely not by choice.”

 

Faith led Eli to a nearby bench that was tucked away in the corner of the garden. They sat together and looked up at the stars. “We’re going to be graduating soon, Eli. What are your plans?”

 


College,” he shrugged, “I’ll probably go to that junior college down the way. You?”

 


I hope to start cosmetology school soon,” she squeezed his hand. “And then maybe I’ll support myself through college by doing hair.”

 


Very smart,” Eli nodded.

 


Mama didn’t raise a fool.” Faith smiled. She paused for a moment and then became serious again. “What do you think is going to happen between us?”

 


What do you want to happen?” He asked.

 

Faith shyly smiled and turned to Eli. “You always answer a question with a question, you know that?”

 


I do?” He smiled.

 


Seriously, baby…” Faith grabbed his hand and rubbed it. “…what do you see between us after we graduate?”

 


Well,” Eli got a little comfortable on the bench and briefly looked up at the stars, “I hope we continue to see each other and see what happens.”

 


But we’ll be out of high school at that point,” Faith replied, “we’ll both have open schedules and a lot more free time.”

 


I guess that means I’ll be able to see you a lot more, huh?” Eli asked.

 


I just don’t want you to feel smothered, Eli.” Faith replied. “I don’t want you to feel that you
have
to see me.”

 

Eli remained quiet for a brief moment as he admired the stars. “Why am I getting the feeling you want me to break up with you?”

 


I’m being realistic, Eli.” Faith stood up and walked over to another corner in the garden. Eli soon followed her and wrapped his arms around her shoulders. “I know the weather is getting warmer and girls are wearing less clothing and I know you’ll probably be wondering why you are with them and why you’re waiting for me.”

 

Eli swayed his girlfriend gently and kissed her cheek. “You like to assume a lot, don’t you?”

 


I’m just saying if you want to pursue someone else because I’m not putting out, now is your chance.” Faith declared.

 

Eli sighed and turned Faith around to face him. “I’m going to repeat what I said on our first lunch date at school and our official date when I picked you up from your parents’ house; because clearly I wasn’t heard the first two times: I will wait for you, Faith. I hate to think I gave up on a great woman because I was impatient. I would love to make love to you. I would love to be the first and only lover you will ever have. But I also know if I do that, I have to wait. I would rather us break up because I got on your nerves or we no longer loved each other.”

 


I had guys break up with me because I didn’t give it up to them,” she frowned, “and I just want to save myself that heartache if you can’t wait.”

 


I’ll wait for you as long as you want me to,” Eli reassured, rubbing his hands up and down Faith’s arms. “I’m not going anywhere, Faye. I told you I see a future with you and I don’t say that to just anyone. But to reassure you, I have a picnic planned for us tomorrow at the meadows, not too far from here. We can just go there, have a nice picnic, and no hanky-panky. Deal?”

 

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