Wild Aces (25 page)

“And you wouldn’t allow Trapper to defend himself,” she said. “I’m just trying to give him the benefit of the doubt.”

I had no idea what the truth was or what Trapper planned to do with that child, but I didn’t think I could wrap my head around either of those things at the moment. Every time I tried to even consider them, Slimy Guy’s face popped into my mind and that gun he had pointed at me, and I’d start to shake again.

“I liked him, Frankie. Really, really liked him. I liked him even more after we slept together. But after tonight, I honestly don’t know that things can work out between us.”

“Are you still going to visit Cody’s parents?”

“I have to.” I sighed, rubbing at the corners of my eyes. “At least for my own curiosity, and I need to go for Cody. And whatever I find out, I’ll tell Trapper, only because it’s the right thing to do.”

I picked up my phone and texted Net to remind him that I needed him to look into Trapper as soon as possible. The sooner I heard back from him and met with Cody’s parents, the sooner this part would be over with. Then I would have to figure out how to deal with the rest, if I wanted to deal with it.

God, tonight screwed up so many things.

“Telling Trapper is the right thing to do,” she agreed.

“I know.” I pulled the blanket off the back of the couch and spread it over us. “You know, you don’t have to stay down here with me. You can go upstairs to your bed where it’s more comfortable.”

“Tonight was traumatizing for you, and I’m not leaving you alone. I have to be here in case you need anything. But I also need to be honest for a second.”

She’d been honest since I walked through her door.

“Okay.”

“I know I haven’t met him, and I know nothing about him, but Derek’s a pretty good judge of character, and he really likes Trapper. That has to count for something. I also don’t believe that someone who shared a womb with Cody could really be a monster.”

“I…” I wished my best friend wasn’t trying to spin this. The shit was ugly. Couldn’t we just leave it at that? “I love that you’re so positive, but I hope it’s not just what you want to believe.”

She rolled onto her back, her knees resting over mine. “I remember one night when things were really bad with Reed. We were lying on my couch, and I was asking you what I should do. I was pregnant, and you told me to go over to his place and speak to him, tell him how I was feeling. So, that’s what I did, and I honestly think it was fate. Had I not gone, I wouldn’t have found him cheating, and I probably would still be with him.”

As she took a deep breath, I remembered the very moment she was describing and the phone call that followed when she left his place.

“That year taught us how strong we are. We survived my miscarriage. We survived Cody’s death. We’ll survive this too, Brea.”

“I know.”

“My gut told me something was off with Reed, and I didn’t want to listen to it. It told me to trust Derek, and I fought it for a long time. It’s telling me to trust Trapper, so that’s the advice I’m giving you. Trust him.”

Trust him.

I didn’t know how I could even consider doing that right now. But there was a chance that, after all the shock wore off—when I could see past the gun and that poor little innocent boy playing in all the trash and those disgusting words Slimy Guy had spoken—I would feel differently. But tonight just fucking sucked.

Frankie’s yawn was huge and extra sleepy-sounding. “I promise I will help you figure out what to do about Trapper, but right now, I have to get some sleep. I have to be up in three hours. I’m just going to close my eyes before I pass out on you.”

Those eyes came with some heavy bags that weren’t the prettiest in this light. I’d have to help her do her makeup in the morning and see if we could hide them.

“I understand, babe. Let’s get some sleep.”

I turned off the lamp and cuddled into the couch, tucking my arm under the pillow. After a few minutes, her breathing turned heavy, and I could tell she was sleeping. I was happy at least one of us was. She wasn’t getting enough lately, and it was starting to show. As for me, sleep wouldn’t be coming anytime soon, not when my mind wouldn’t let go of the look on Trapper’s face as he had tied up Slimy Guy and how he had told me to let go of that baby. How could he be
that
person? How could he have lied to me?

Trapper

“How about some water, honey?” Vera asked, her hand somewhere on me, her voice real quiet and calm.

I’d been sitting at this table for over twenty hours, only getting up to go to the bathroom. Vera and Roman kept checking on me, and every time, I told them the same thing—I didn’t want to talk. I wanted to drink and play cards and be left the fuck alone. They were worried; my binges never usually lasted this long unless I was at a tournament. Didn’t they know this was a goddamn tournament? A tournament to see how much beer I could drink and how many rounds I could play before I forgot what happened at that fucker’s house.

“No, I want beer,” I said. “And keep them coming.”

“Are you sure?”

I glanced behind me. The fast movement made my vision blur, and more than one of her appeared. She was only trying to help, but I didn’t want help. I didn’t want softness. And I sure as fuck didn’t want pity. I wanted Brea, and I wanted silence. Vera couldn’t give me that.

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

I turned back to the table and looked at my cards. I had the lowest pair on the felt, and the dude across from me was trying to scare me out of the hand. I knew he was holding something higher. If I threw in all my chips, I could have bought the pot. He’d been playing weak for the last hour, and he didn’t know how to read me.

I threw my cards to the center and walked into the back hallway, hanging on to the wall as I headed for the bathroom. There was a floor under my feet; there had to be. But I didn’t feel it. Too much beer. It had been too much beer hours ago. Maybe Vera was right. Maybe I needed some water. And a nap. Just a quick one in Roman’s office, and then I’d go back to the table and try to find that goddamn silence that I needed.

“Hey, baby,” I heard from behind me. “Did you come back here to look for me?”

Shay. Her voice was close to my ear. Way too fucking close.

I leaned my shoulder into the wall and rolled around to face her. She was almost close enough to touch me, so I backed up a step, my boots banging into each other.

“What are you doing back here?”

“This is the employee hallway,” she said, licking her lips. “The real question is, what are
you
doing back here?”

I looked past her and to my other side. She was right. What the hell was I doing back here? Instead of going to the bathrooms off the main lounge, I’d come into the employee hallway, and I was walking toward their restrooms.

“I sure as hell didn’t come back here, looking for you, if that’s what you’re thinking.”

She laughed, flipping her hair over her shoulder so that her tits came into full view. “I doubt that. I think you came back here because you want me to suck your dick, and you don’t want everyone out there to know.” She looked up at me through her long eyelashes, her hand tracing a path from my belt buckle to the collar of my shirt. “Baby, I know you want that long, thick cock of yours sucked by this beautiful mouth.” She was messing with my belt strap, trying to loosen it from the loop that held it. “You used to love watching me lick your cum off my lips. I know you miss that, and I know you miss these lips. And these lips sure as fuck miss you.” She pouted them, her tongue making a slow circle around each one.

I was drunk. I wasn’t fucking stupid. I grabbed her wrist and pulled her hand off me. “Turn around, Shay, and get the hell out of here.”

“I don’t think so.” She tried wiggling out of my grip. “Let me come to the bathroom with you. I can hold your cock while you pee.” She stepped closer. “I’ll slide it out slowly, and I’ll hold it near your balls, just the way you like me to.”

I had nothing to say.

“I’ll help you aim the head and make sure you get it all in the hole. Then I’ll gently lick all the way around the tip to make sure there isn’t a drop left.” Not many chicks could make a conversation about pissing sound hot. Shay was one, but she wasn’t what I was looking for anymore.

“I can hold my own dick. I don’t need your help.”

“Then I can help with something else.” She ran her fingers through my hair, pulling my head down until her lips reached my ear. “Someone has hurt you; I can see that. Let me help you forget her.” Her tongue touched my earlobe. “You know how well my pussy can take away your pain.”

Something vibrated in my pocket. It was my damn phone. I let go of Shay’s wrist and pulled it out. It was a text from—

Oh, fuck…Brea.

“Get out of here, Shay. Ruddy’s the only one you’re gonna get to fuck you in that bathroom.”

“Mmm,” she moaned. “I was hoping you saw that.” Her hand slid down until it was underneath her skirt. I knew the second she touched her cunt because she whimpered, like the tease of her fingers weren’t enough. Shay always needed more. “Baby, you know—”

“What I know is that I don’t miss you at all.”

Her hand came out of her skirt and moved toward me. I caught her wrist again, not looking at her fingertips to see if they were wet and not smelling the air, knowing it would be filled with her scent.

“I lost all respect for you when you turned crazy on me. Seeing you riding him just confirmed that you’re the slut I thought you were. Now, take your dirty pussy, and get the fuck out of here.”

I saw the pain in her eyes before she turned and stomped off.

“Fuck you,” she said over her shoulder.

I didn’t usually play it so rough, but it was the only way she’d leave. Shay wasn’t one to just lie down and take what I said to her. She played to get even. But Aced was my home, and there was no way for her to get revenge in here.

I pushed myself off the wall and stumbled into the bathroom, reading Brea’s text when I got inside.

Brea: Tomorrow.

I’d sent her a text earlier, asking when she was going to see Cody’s parents, and it had taken her hours to reply. And after three fucking days of silence, all she’d given me was a one-word reply.

Me: Let me go with you.

I tucked the phone into my pocket and took a piss. Then I washed my hands, sat on the counter by the sink, and waited for her to write back. I knew she’d say no, but damn, I hoped she’d say yes. Even if that meant I’d have to stay parked outside his parents’ house and wait for her, I just wanted to see her.

Brea: No, but I’ll let you know what they say.

Me: How are you?

The words were all running together, but I was able to see the bubble and dots under her name. She was typing. Then she stopped. She started again and stopped. I knew I wasn’t seeing things. She was just having a hard time coming up with an answer.

Brea: Shitty.

Me: Me fucking, too.

I waited for her to write back, but she didn’t. I wasn’t going to drop this. I needed to see her, to hear her, even if it meant just reading more of her words through a goddamn text.

Me: I want to see you.

There wasn’t a bubble or any dots under her name this time. She wasn’t going to let me see her. She wasn’t going to write back.

I hated this.

I walked over to the paper towel dispenser and ripped it off the wall. Then I held it above my head and slammed it to the ground. The metal screeched when it hit the tiles, and brown paper snowed all over the room. I kicked the towels that landed by my feet and almost lost my balance.

“Fuck!” I shouted, catching myself on the edge of the counter.

My chest heaved, and my hands shook. Everything was spinning. There was now a huge hole in the wall where the metal holder had been. The tiles were cracked, and there were towels everywhere. I’d have to give Roman some chips later for fucking up his bathroom.

I threw some water over my face to cool it down and moved to the corner, away from the sinks and toilets, and sat down. I tucked my legs in as close as I could get them and buried my face in the darkness between my chest and knees.

“Oh, honey,” Vera said.

I looked up as she was peeking her head through the doorway, staring at me with that expression I knew so well.

“Why didn’t you just talk to me?”

I could have pulled her into the back room and told her everything. I could have gone into Roman’s office and talked to him. I could have called Adrianna, and she would have come and gotten me. I didn’t have to be sitting in the corner of the bathroom all by myself, surrounded by a pile of brown paper snow. I had people now. And those people had been in my life for a while. But I chose not to talk to them about this. And I did what I knew, and that was being alone with my darkness, letting the memories and the screams and the import and that fucking junkie’s gun send me into this corner.

“I’m not talking about it, Vera.”

“Then at least come out of the bathroom and let me take you to my place, so I can cook you a good meal.”

“No, I—”

“I never ask anything from you, son.” She only called me that when things got real serious, and she wouldn’t be taking no for an answer. “But I’m asking you now to get off that floor and come home with me, so I can take care of you. I’m not leaving this bathroom until you say yes.”