Wrapped Around My Finger (2 page)

No, they wouldn’t get away with it.

Jagger said I’d given him the courage to walk away from escorting. And he’d given me the courage to tell these assholes to eat shit and die.

This was never my home, I reminded myself as I cut the engine in Rich’s driveway. A different woman lived here. I recognized this place less every time I came. At one time, I’d been so proud of this house, and now it looked like a mausoleum.

I turned to Jagger. “Ready for this?”

“You want me to come in with you?” He raised an eyebrow. To a lesser extent, being here must have given him post-traumatic stress, too.

The easy thing would’ve been to text Raven and have her run out. Make a clean getaway. But that fed the monster, and gave the problem new life. It made everything that happened on Christmas Eve okay, and it so wasn’t.

Knocking on the door was another insult. I’d texted Raven as well, hoping she’d meet us at the doorstep.

Like with everything else, I didn’t get my wish when it came to my ex-husband. Rich answered the door and sized up Jagger, who wouldn’t give his opponent the satisfaction of a showdown.

“Wow. I think I’ll go to court after all to have my child support adjusted if you can afford to keep your hooker during a blizzard. Looks like you’re doing better than I am.”

I balled my fists in my jacket pockets to keep from strangling him—his round face was already bright red. “I was always doing better than you were, you son of a bitch. Your money doesn’t support me, it supports Raven. It gives me a chance to show her there’s a world out there beyond your sad, sorry, scared view of things. Your negative shit.”

Rich scoffed. I gave him a chance to come up with something, anything in his defense. He had nothing.

“You can’t blame that on me,” he finally said, shaking his head. His grin told me as usual, he wasn’t taking me seriously.

“Yes I can, because the same thing happened to me. You didn’t want me anymore. You made that abundantly clear when you started sleeping with another woman while we were still married. And you want to judge how I met someone? Make me feel like the dirty one? Fuck yourself, Rich.” I’d told him to do that so many times. Eventually, it would sink in. “You can stay in your castle where nothing ever changes and mock people for doing what you don’t have the balls to do. Move on.

“And Shelley—“ She’d been watching the whole thing from the back of the foyer with the same satisfied smirk I wanted to smack off Rich’s face. “—did Christmas Eve feel good? Did you and Beth spend all month planning that? The part of the year when you’re supposed to give back to others. The sad thing is, you have so much to give. Instead, you wasted it trying to take something away from me. Or should I say, something
else
. But I never had a chance to thank you. All I wanted was to spend Christmas with Jagger. I didn’t expect you to be the one to make it happen.”

Shelley laughed, and my blood boiled. “Christmas with a hooker. How’d that go?”

“Better than any Christmas I spent with your husband. Don’t you dare judge Jagger. You fucked your way into this house, too. You couldn’t afford to live like this unless you put out. And let me tell you something else—it’s not worth it. Rich will trade you in for a newer model when you’re not so hot anymore. When he realizes you’re a sad, empty excuse for a human.”

“Like you?” Rich asked.

“No. Like you, when you can’t stand to look at yourself in the mirror anymore. Because you, Shelley, and Beth are one and the same. Pathetic excuses for human beings. I’m done letting you drag me to that level. I don’t want your apology, it means nothing. Every time you think of me I want you to realize I thank God this isn’t my life anymore. I am so much better without you.”

I didn’t wait for an answer. I didn’t want one. Thankfully I had one of those push-button start cars or I would’ve never got the key in the ignition.

“I’m proud of you.” Jagger put his hand over mine on the gear shaft.

I nodded. I wasn’t ready to drive, but I had to get the hell out of there.

“Mom, did you really hire Jagger? Like a prostitute? Dad kept saying it. Please tell me this is him being a drama king.” The house was still visible in the rearview mirror when Raven began her interrogation. It wasn’t unexpected. She’d surely been hammered with this crap all weekend since they probably figured she had some grade-A dirt on us to offer up.

I glanced over at Jagger, trying to do that mind-melding thing that usually came a little later in the relationship.

“It’s true!” Raven exclaimed when no one answered.

“I’ve got this,” I murmured to Jagger before meeting Raven’s eyes in the mirror. She greeted me with a death stare. The two of us had the mild-meld thing down, and this said
how could you do this to me?
loud and clear. Back to the road before I killed us all. “Yes. I hired him to come to the reunion with me.”

She gasped. “Why would you do that?”

Jagger looked uncomfortable, but he didn’t turn away from me. She wasn’t questioning
him;
her rage was all for me.

“I met your father when I was your age. Things change the second time around. It’s not so easy. I’m busy, and I don’t have time to waste with men I’m not interested in.” We’d reached a red light and I looked back at Raven. She was about to crawl out of her skin. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but you asked, and I’m telling you the truth. It was just supposed to be for the reunion, but we wound up hitting it off.”

“Are you paying him now?”
Him
was tipped with acid. I didn’t expect her to understand, but this hurt. And I could only imagine how Jagger felt.

“Jagger can hear you, sweetie.” I merged onto the highway, and it would be a miracle if I didn’t get pulled over between here and DC. My foot was too heavy for its own good. “No, I’m not paying him. And if you have any other questions about his job, he’ll be happy to answer them. He’s no different than he was before you found out what he did for a living.”

Before Christmas, Raven had opened up to Jagger, something she rarely did. She went from hiding in her room to actually hanging out with us. I never introduced her to any guy I dated before I met him. They didn’t mean enough to me to meet my daughter. She was almost eighteen and headed to college in the fall, and while no kid was ever ready to delve into their parents’ sex lives, she was more than old enough to have this conversation with Jagger.

This could go either way. She’d either put on her headphones and ignore us for the next eight hours, or she’d actually go through with it.

“Do you get paid to have sex with people?” Raven asked.

Jagger turned around in his seat, and out of the corner of my eye, I caught his smile. My heart was in my throat and I probably shouldn’t have been driving during this conversation.

“My official job description is that I provide companionship to the women who hire me. That means different things to different people.”

Raven made a sound that sounded like a groan crossed with disappointment. “Are you still
providing companionship
, now that you’re with my mom?”

Jagger didn’t shy away from the inquisition. “No, I’m not.”

“Good.” Raven visibly relaxed when I snuck a peek at her. “She’s already dealt with one cheating jerk. I like you. Please don’t turn out to be a jerk.”

He laughed. “I don’t plan on it. Listen, I understand that this is awkward as hell. It is for me, too. The bottom line is I’m not going to do anything to hurt your mom. And I’ll answer any questions you have. Or none, if you prefer. I don’t want this to be weird.”

“That makes two of us.” Raven smiled shyly before putting her headphones on.

Jagger let out a huge breath when he turned around.

“That went well,” I said.

“This is the stuff I never wanted to deal with. Justifying what I’ve done.” Jagger shook his head. “What Raven thinks matters to me. I want her respect.”

Rich would’ve never said that. Jagger was so much more of a man than my ex, and yet he was the one constantly playing defense. I wished I could tell him it would be okay. “Thank you.”

“I mean it, Leah. I don’t want this to be weird. And I’m not going to do anything to hurt you.”

I reached over and squeezed his thigh. “Don’t be a jerk, and the rest will work itself out.”

J
agger

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Leah crawled behind me on the bed and put her hands on my shoulders. My head fell forward as she worked on the knot at the base of my neck. I could’ve done this in any room of her house, but this was the place. I’d been in a lot of women’s bedrooms, but none of them had ever felt like home until Leah brought me here.

“Never been more sure of anything in my life. But if you keep doing that, I won’t want to do anything but fuck you.” She’d just come out of the shower, and smelled amazing. It took everything I had not to join her. Leah and Raven shared a bathroom and after our discussion yesterday, the last thing she needed to do was catch us together in the shower.

“Think of it as a taste of things to come.” She kissed my shoulder. “Good luck.”

I prepped myself for the shitstorm as I made the call.

“What the hell is going on with you?” Barry, my boss, asked as soon as he answered the phone. “Beth Barnes is threatening to sue, Jagger. Blow the cover on the business. I’ve already given her a refund. So don’t even think about looking for a check for that job.”

“I don’t want her money.” How did I sum up the fuckery of this client? “Beth Barnes wasn’t honest about her intentions.”

“So fucking what? Our entire business is built on dishonesty.” Barry laughed. “And discretion. If she sues, it’s not just your ass on the line. It’s the entire roster, as well as our clients. This isn’t one lawsuit. It’s many, if the information falls into the wrong hands.”

No surprise Beth would be a complete pain in the ass, but I didn’t think she’d actually go through with a lawsuit. She didn’t seem like the type to lead a witch hunt. More like the kind who was perfectly content to stoke the flames and leave everyone else to put out the fire. “Give her what she wants. Keep her quiet,” I said.

“She wants an apology.”

I laughed. “I should be the one asking for an apology.”

Barry groaned. “You should be begging for your job. Your client for tomorrow night called to confirm. Don’t fuck this one up. She’s an A-list actress in town for New Year’s Eve.”

“Replace me.”

Silence. “What did you just say? No.” Barry heard me just fine. “Rent a tux and go to the party, Jagger. Snag some famous pussy and call it a year.”

“I said replace me. I quit. Don’t bother trying to talk me into it. I’m not in Miami.”

“Where are you?” Barry usually checked in with us after long jobs. Nothing was guaranteed in escorting, including our safety. With a lawsuit hanging over his head, protocol went out the window.

“DC.” I turned around, aware of Leah in the doorway. She blew me a kiss and disappeared.

“What the fuck are you doing there?”

“I met someone.”
And you introduced us, Barry.

“Wait a minute.” Barry scrambled on the other end of the line. “Who did I send you there to work with? Leah Godfrey. Jag, you can’t date a client.”

“Why not?” I was so fucking tired of people telling me what I couldn’t do.

“It’s unethical. Especially in light of the Beth Barnes situation. These women talk. You know that. If they find out they can get free time with the escorts, it will kill this business.”

“Ethics? You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.” I laughed. Barry had some big brass ones. It was what made his business so successful.

Barry scoffed. “Don’t act like you’re holier than thou since you met someone. This business has been very good to you for years. It’s not the time to create problems.”

“It’s not a problem. I’m not an escort anymore.”

“Listen to me, Jagger. I’ve seen Leah on TV. She’s a beautiful woman, but you know better. You’ve had clients think they’ve fallen in love with you before. It’s never ended well. We’ve got one lawsuit on our hands. Let’s keep it at that.”

An occupational hazard of playing into women’s fantasies was the lines sometimes blurred into reality. I’d had women think we were in a relationship before, and bankrupt themselves to live the lie. It was painful to watch, but I’d always been able to keep myself detached. I had to, for sanity’s sake.

I never let myself fall. I knew better. Until Leah.

I couldn’t stand the emptiness anymore. For years there’d been a phantom pain where my heart was supposed to be.

The last thing Barry wanted to hear about was feelings. “You tell all of us if it’s not fun anymore, get out. It’s not fun anymore. I can’t give a client her money’s worth if all I can think about is how much I want to be with someone else.”

Barry exhaled loudly. “Okay. If this is what you think you want. The door is always open, Jagger. This is what you’re good at.”

**

F
uck. I’d just quit the only job I’d ever had for a woman I barely knew. Her star was on the rise, and mine was bobbing in the gutter.

Raven squeezed by me on the stairs without a word. Headphones blaring, something that looked like a Pop Tart in hand. In the eternal battle of Leah vs. Rich, Raven usually took her mother’s side. But this battle I’d lost; she hadn’t said a word to me since our conversation in the car.

“I’m proud of you,” Leah said when I came in the kitchen, and she went up on her tiptoes to kiss me. I held her in place, taking absolutely everything I could from her lips. Her beauty, her perseverance, and her never-ending belief everything would be all right.

With her warm, soft body pressed against mine, there was no doubt in my mind I’d done the right thing.

“It’s scary as hell, isn’t it? I felt the same way when I left Rich. I had nothing and I had to start from scratch.” She handed me a coffee mug and sat down with her own. I made that call without coffee. Damn. It could’ve gone much worse.

“I’ve been waiting for years for the perfect time to walk away, but it never came.” That wasn’t true. This was it, right now, drinking coffee with Leah.