Authors: Johanna Lindsey
S
heena entered the living quarters through the servants’ entrance, so she would not have to pass through the hall. She ran up the stairs leading to the second floor, along the corridor to the tower, and up more stairs to her room. When she opened the door, she saw two gowns folded on the window seat, and bolts of cloth to make more. The sight brought tears to her eyes, for a new wardrobe seemed to imply that she would never leave there.
She threw herself on the bed, sobbing, then quickly sat up. Her breasts were sensitive, her nerves raw.
“God, what has he done to me? I canna even touch myself and no’ be reminded…”
How had it happened? She couldn’t begin to answer. She knew only that she had been drugged with a heady magic, and she recalled everything, every moment. She blushed.
“He’s a devil with a devil’s magic, and he works a potent spell. I need to get far, far away from James MacKinnion.”
The one who had made Sheena cry came to her door much later that day. She had slept a little, worn out by confusion and tears. Since waking, she had been combing out her lustrous hair while sitting on the window seat, trying to calm her jangled nerves. But when she saw Jamie, her pulse picked up its beat again, and when he spoke, she jumped.
“You must like this room. You spend so much time in it,” he commented with a lazy smile.
“At least I am alone here. Or I
was
,” she said pointedly, backing away from him. “Why have you come?”
“To escort you to the hall. We’ve guests, and it grows late.”
“I suggest you attend your guests alone,” Sheena replied stiffly.
“I wish to have you at my side,” he said.
“But I wish to stay here.”
“Now who do you think will be getting their wish?” he said with a grin.
“Is that an order?” she asked sharply.
“Aye.”
Sheena cried furiously, “Just who do you think you are?”
“Laird of the MacKinnions,” he answered: smoothly.
“But I’m
no
’ a MacKinnion, and I dinna take kindly to your ordering me about. You’ve no rights over me!”
“Enough, Sheena.” He cut her off. “I’ll no’ debate with you. Now I dinna give orders often—”
“You most certainly do,” she said.
He frowned. “But when I do, my orders will be obeyed.”
“’Tis no’ fair!” she cried. “You take advantage of your position.”
“Nay, lass, I dinna do that, or I would’ve had you where I want you ’afore now.” She blushed and looked away. His tone softened. “’Tis minor things I insist on, and I wouldna have to insist at all if you didna hide yourself up here.”
“’Tis a matter of freedom, Sir Jamie, and you’re denying me mine.”
Jamie chuckled. “You would be a hermit if I let you. Have you no’ learned yet that woman’s will is less than man’s?”
“Only if woman lets it be so,” Sheena said quickly.
Jamie sighed. “I dinna know why I put up with this. Dinna make me force you, Sheena. Come along.”
Sheena barely managed to keep herself from shouting. What would defiance accomplish? She was helpless. They both knew it.
But she still had her pride. “Move away from the door, then.”
“Why?”
“So I can pass.”
Jamie grinned and stepped back, bowing. “Your wish is my command.”
“Would that it were, I would no’ be here now,” she said sharply, as she passed him smoothly. She kept up her pace, staying always a little ahead of him, until she reached the arched entrance to the hall. The large room was full of people, and noisy. There was a festive air.
“A feast in honor of our guests,” Jamie whispered behind her. “’Tis no’ often we have guests and an excuse for festivity.”
“Your guests are important?”
“Nay, ’tis only Will Jameson and some of his retainers. Will lives east, across the river.”
“Friend or foe?”
Jamie chuckled. “Well now, I can never be sure with old Will. He professes friendship, yet he does try to rile me. I think he just likes to live dangerously.”
Sheena stiffened. “Do I detect a subtle warning, Sir Jamie?”
“Come now, Sheena,” he admonished lightly. “Must I guard every word I speak? Dinna hunt for hidden meanings.”
“Your meaning was clear enough and not hidden,” she returned resentfully. “A person must live in fear of your anger.”
“Not you, Sheena.”
His warm breath near her ear sent shivers over her.
“Your…your guests await, Sir Jamie,” she said weakly.
“They can wait a moment more.” He turned her around to face him, but she wouldn’t meet his eyes. “Look at me, Sheena. Give me the answer I’ve been waiting to hear all day.”
She kept her gaze lowered. “I dinna know what you mean.”
“You do,” he replied softly. “And I’ve been patient.”
“Patient?” Her eyes widened incredulously, and she looked directly at him. “You call only one day’s waiting being patient?”
“For me it is.” He grinned. “I thought to have the matter settled ’afore we returned from our ride, but I hadna anticipated the interruption of our…dalliance.”
Sheena blushed. Oh, how she wanted to forget that afternoon! Now there he was, sure of victory, just because she had been snared by his spell for a short time. Didn’t he realize his magic worked only when he touched her? He needed a setdown, and she ached to give it to him.
A smile curled her lips, and Jamie took heart. “You’ll be telling me what I want to hear, lass?”
“This is no’ the time, Sir Jamie.”
He frowned. “Why not?”
“I dinna think my answer is…what you’re wanting to hear.”
He stared at her hard, and she watched a muscle tighten along his jaw. Then his chest expanded as he
took one deep breath. In the awful silence, she heard her heart drumming. Her own chest tightened, for she was holding her breath.
He’s going to kill me, she thought wildly. For refusing him!
“You were right, Sheena,” he said at last. “This is no’ the time.”
“What?”
Her surprise made him feel a little better. “We spoke of trust today, but you’re no’ ready yet to trust me, so I’ll be giving you more time. I’ll wait.”
“But—”
“I’ll wait, Sheena.”
The subject was closed. He took her arm and led her into the hall. The arrogance of him! So he would wait, would he? Let him wait until the stars fell from the sky!
“Sir William, may I present Sheena MacEwen, late of Aberdeen.”
“I am—” William Jameson turned his gaze on Sheena and caught his breath. “Delighted.”
Sheena managed a nod before Jamie sat her down in the chair next to his and took his own, placing himself between her and the agreeable-looking stranger. She leaned forward to see the man who dared rile the laird of the MacKinnions, but Jamie leaned forward, as well, blocking her view. She surveyed the hall, meeting eyes wherever hers wandered, finally looking back at their table, uncomfortable under so many questioning gazes.
Food was served immediately. It was grouse
stuffed with buttered wild cranberries, roasted venison, boiled carrots, and sugar rolls and scones to dip in sweet heather honey. But Sheena could not do justice to the food, not with so many eyes turned her way. What must these people think of her, sitting in the place where Jessie Martin had been only the day before? Had it really been only two days since she’d met Jamie MacKinnion?
“It seems like a lifetime.”
“Did you say something, hinny?”
Lydia MacKinnion was sitting beside her, on her left. “I didna see you,” Sheena said apologetically,
“I only just came in. I understand you had a pleasant ride today.”
Sheena’s cheeks stained. “And who was it told you that?”
“Why, Jamie. He said you enjoyed yourself immensely, and ’tis glad I am. Sheena, the lad’s taken with you. It does my heart good to see he’s finally ready to stop philandering and settle on one lass.”
Sheena nearly choked. “But
I’m
no’ ready—I assure you.”
Lydia patted her hand. “I understand your reluctance, hinny. Jamie is a formidable man, like his father. Robbie could be a terror—but never with those he loved. He, too, found a woman who was right for him, and he loved her till the day she died—longer, perhaps.”
“Loved her? But Colen says his mother and father fought all the time. Why, the tower where I sleep was where she went to escape him.”
“Aye, they did fight.” Lydia smiled with fond remembrance. “But how they loved. It seems to be the way with true love.”
Sheena was aghast. “I must disagree, m’lady. There is peace in true love, and sharing, and—”
“You know a great deal about it, do you?” the older woman said with a smile.
“Well, ’tis how it should be, surely.”
Lydia chuckled. “And I’m sure it is with lovers of mellow temperaments. But when two strong-willed people love each other, they canna help but clash wills sometimes.”
“I suppose.”
“Now Jamie, he has the devil’s own temper and can be a wee bit intolerable at times. If the lass he weds has little spunk, he will dominate her completely. But if she has a will to match his…I’ll wager she’ll win more battles than she’ll lose.”
Sheena’s curiosity was piqued, despite herself. “And why is that?”
“Because of love, m’dear. Why else would Jamie take a wife? He’s no one to tell him to, now his father’s gone. He’s in no need of an alliance through marriage, for he has many strong alliances as it is. Riches couldna tempt him, for he has enough wealth. So why would he commit himself to one woman, when he has any woman he wants just for the asking? Love, m’dear, is the only reason Jamie would marry.”
Lydia began filling her plate then, and Sheena turned away, grateful to have the disturbing conver
sation ended. Love? There was no love in handfasting, and no honor, either. And handfasting was all Sir Jamie offered her. How easy for him, when he could back down before the final commitment. How convenient. But he would not use her that way; she would leave first. It was time she devoted herself to doing just that.
Her only hope was Colen. She looked up and saw him at the opposite end of the table, looking downright sullen. She was undoubtedly the reason. If only she could make use of his resentment to help her get away. But his resentment might just work against her, as well. Who did that leave? Black Gawain was gone. Lydia seemed entirely on Jamie’s side. That left only William Jameson. He was not answerable to Jamie, and he seemed taken with Sheena.
She leaned forward to look at him carefully and was surprised to find him almost unrecognizable. Anger made his face paler, his red hair seem brighter, his soft brown eyes hard, damning. Worse was his tone of voice. An argument was in progress, and getting out of hand.
“You were to marry my sister, Jamie,” William was saying bitterly. “When you took her in, when you flaunted her as your mistress, I didn’t interfere, for she swore to me you promised to wed her!”
Incensed though William was, Jamie was calm. “Libby lied. It was understood from the start that there would be no marriage. She knew it well, and still she decided to stay here.”
“You used her, Jamie, like all the other women you’ve used and cast aside!”
“My women are never unwilling.” Jamie’s voice was rising now. “Your sister came to me of her own choice and left the same way—only richer, with a fat purse of gold to take her where she wanted to go.”
“And where is that?” William demanded.
Jamie laughed. “So you canna find her? Is that what this is all about?”
“She could be dead for all I know.”
“Nay, Will, you’ll find she’s living royally somewhere where she wants to be. You see, she knew I would provide generously for her. ’Twas all she wanted from me, a way to escape you.”
“That is a lie!”
“Is it?” Jamie countered. “I wonder what riles you most, Will, that she came to me, or that she didna return to you?”
“Bastard!”
Jamie rose abruptly, and William Jameson paled, realizing he had gone too far. There was an awful silence as Jamie looked down at him. Sheena couldn’t see his furious expression, but she saw the hardness of his back, the clenched fists.
His voice held an icy edge. “I’ll be excusing myself ’afore I take your insults to heart and forget you’re a guest in my home. But you’ll be gone from here by morning, Jameson, and you won’t find a welcome here again.”
Jamie walked away stiffly, and Sheena sighed with relief. She turned to Lydia.
“And what was that all about?” She whispered because William Jameson was still sitting only a chair away from her.
“He’s a bitter man, hinny, Will is. His parents died long ago, and he raised his sister himself from a wee bairn. But he devoted himself too much to her, and his love smothered her. ’Tis no wonder he doesna ken her desire to be away from him, but the truth of it is, she is a spoiled and fickle lass and never returned his affection. I came to know her while she was here, and I didna like her one bit. She thought nothing of ridiculing her brother to us, painting a picture of a man pathetically worshiping his own sister. The man is lucky to be rid of her, but I’m afraid he’ll never see it that way.”
“Will Sir William leave then?”
Lydia laughed softly and leaned closer to whisper. “He’s a bit of a coward, hinny. He’ll be leaving any moment now.”
Sheena wondered if that was so, but as she turned, she saw him standing up, calling his men together. A minute later, they all stalked furiously from the hall.
Sheena panicked. There, walking angrily away, was her last chance. She quickly made her excuses to Lydia and crossed the hall, apparently on her way to the south tower. But as soon as she passed under the arched entrance at the end of the hall, she
dashed to the left instead of up the stairs. Then she was out in the courtyard and running toward William Jameson.
He was by the stable with four retainers, waiting impatiently for their horses. Sheena failed to consider the foolhardiness in approaching a stranger. She saw Jameson only as a means to her freedom.
“A word, Sir William, if you will,” she called out.
“What is it?” he snapped. Then he turned and saw her. He was quite startled. “Well, well, Sir Jamie’s new whore, is it?”