Almost Perfect (6 page)

I felt strangely guilty, like I was giving a foot rub to a friend’s girlfriend. Sage had told me she wanted me as a
friend. Her sister had warned me off. If I was ready to start dating again, I shouldn’t waste time hitting on a girl with all these issues.

And yet, here I was, kneading her feet and probably enjoying it more than she was. Maybe later, she’d like a shoulder rub. Or a back rub. Or a front rub.

I knew I needed to stop. In spite of his dysentery attack, Tim was watching us. After the cookies the other day, Tim was convinced that Sage wanted me for a boyfriend. He’d think I was lying if I tried to tell him otherwise.

Was it really time to stop pursuing Sage? What had Mom said the other night about missed opportunities? Something told me that if I gave up on Sage, I’d end up regretting it.

When Mr. Elmer finished his review, I removed my hands from Sage’s foot. She shot me a fake scowl.

“Uh, Sage,” I began. “We’re all going to the basketball game Friday. Want to join us?”

There. Friends go to sports events together. There’s nothing wrong with my asking
.

She tilted her head and scratched her chin as if she was contemplating the mysteries of the universe. “Sure!” she said after a minute. “I think I can get out. I’ll meet you there.”

The bell rang. Sage carelessly retracted her feet across my crotch, momentarily causing me a flash of blinding pain. She was out the door in seconds.

I turned to Tim, ready to gloat that I wasn’t afraid of Sage. Before I could say anything, he let out a loud fart so stinky that it covered the odor of the frog preservative.

He leapt to his feet with a grin on his face. “I feel like a new man!”

I hoped Sage really would show up at the game. I needed a change of company.

Time seemed to stand still as our center threw a desperate, longer-than-half-court shot with no time left in the half. For an agonizing second the basketball seemed to hover directly over the rim. Then gravity took effect and the shot went wide.

No big deal; we were down by twenty-four points.

Half the town had turned out for Friday night basketball. The tiny gym was stuffed to the gills as the Moberly Spartans wiped the floor with the Boyer Bears. Moberly was large enough that people actually had to try out for their team. At Boyer, anyone interested was pretty much guaranteed court time.

The cheerleading squad assembled at half-court and proceeded to perform the same three cheers they did at every game. I could see Tanya at the bottom of the pyramid.

For the third or fourth time, I scanned the seats for Sage’s lanky form. She had said she’d meet me here, but it looked like she had other plans. Maybe her parents had refused her, or maybe Tammi had tattled. Or she just didn’t want to go.

It didn’t matter. It’s not like I’d been looking forward to this all day. Not like I’d rushed home in order to take a shower and shave before the game. Not like I’d spent my
emergency fund on a new shirt. Not like I’d spent the past hour barking at anyone who tried to take the seat next to me.

“Hey, Logan.” Tim had joined me. And, shockingly, he had what appeared to be a female with him.

She was a skinny girl with deep blue eyes, the only feature that kept her from being a true albino. Her short hair was almost white and her skin seemed to have no pigmentation at all. She was the sort of person who might catch fire on a sunny day.

“Logan, this is Dawn. Dawn, this is Logan.” Tim was grinning as if he’d just pulled her out of a hat.

I shook her hand. “Don’t I know you?”

“Maybe. I work at the Forum Eight snack counter.”

Ah, so that was where Tim met her. With the amount of money he poured into that place, I was surprised they didn’t provide him with a wife.

The cheerleaders eventually finished their routine, and the basketball team thundered back onto the court. Jack, who was not a starter, had been put in for the second half. He wasn’t especially good at passing, but the guy moved like a gas molecule and could dribble the ball like a jack-hammer.

The cheerleaders had converged near the exit. I recognized Tanya’s circular shape. I watched as a strange boy approached her from behind and wrapped his arms around her neck. She turned and kissed him for an entire Boyer time-out. Apparently, I’d missed the boat with her.

Five minutes into the third quarter, Jack’s wildly flailing elbow connected with a Spartan’s face. A couple of the
Moberly players didn’t seem to think it was accidental, and for a few seconds, it looked like there was going to be a brawl.

After the two coaches defused the situation, I turned to Tim to make a joke. Then I quickly turned away. For once, Tim had his lips wrapped around something besides a corn dog.

That was my cue to leave. Not only had Sage stood me up, but now Tim and Dawn were exchanging closed-mouthed little kisses and giggling. I grabbed my jacket.

“Hey, you leaving?” asked Tim when I stood up.

“We’re getting stomped. I’ll see you guys later.”

“You sure? We’re going to Mr. Pizza after the game.”

That had
third wheel
written all over it. I slouched out of the gym building and into the cold autumn night. The whole parking lot was filled to capacity with pickup trucks and vans. Every other vehicle had an NRA bumper sticker or one of those decals of Calvin pissing on something. I buttoned my jacket and prepared for the mile-and-a-half walk home.

I recognized Brenda’s car parked alone over by the middle school. That ugly gold Saturn with the unnecessary spoiler and the little clown head on the aerial. I allowed myself a sad smile, remembering the backseat. Parking lots, dirt roads, Brenda’s driveway—our lips never separating, even as Brenda firmly shoved away my exploring hands. I’d been patient; I’d figured someday she wouldn’t man the defenses. I just kind of assumed I’d be there when it happened.

Brenda was around here somewhere. I thought maybe I should try to find her and say hi. Just walk by her and say,
Oh, hey, didn’t see you; how’s it going?
Let her know I was okay and bury the hatchet. Unless she was here with that new boyfriend. Then I’d just bury my fist in his face.

I was eighteen, alone, unloved, broke, and, I suddenly realized, seconds away from being hit by a car.

The driver didn’t have his lights on. I only realized he was barreling toward me by the sound of his squealing tires and the shadow of the vehicle against the parking lot lights.

I deftly went sprawling into a handicapped space as the car, a Chevy with one busted headlight and no grill, fish-tailed to a stop behind me. I leapt to my feet, wondering if I was about to threaten a bad Boyer driver or have my ass pounded by a carload of insane Moberly fans.

Before my adrenaline rush kicked in, the driver rolled down his window. I knew the guy, a redheaded sophomore named Rob. He was a big oaf, the kind of guy you read about in the paper who’d accidentally shot himself in the butt or burned down his house trying to remove a wasp’s nest.

“Sorry, Logan.”

It was impossible to stay mad at Rob. I remembered the time he congratulated a girl undergoing chemotherapy on her successful “diet.”

“Did you just get your license?”

“Soon.”

He wasn’t alone in the car. There was a short girl sitting next to him. She looked familiar.

“Hey, Logan.”

I squinted into the darkness. It was Sage’s sister, Tammi.

From the rear of the car came a familiar feminine voice. “Get in the car, Logan.”

I joined Sage, who was sitting cross-legged in the backseat. She didn’t scoot over to make room for me, so I was wedged in comfortably close to her. If this was a normal relationship, I’d have leaned over and kissed her. However, I remembered what had happened the last time I’d tried to merge lips, so I just patted her knee.

“Sorry we’re late,” she said. “Is the game over already?”

“No,” I replied. “We were just losing real bad—”

Rob peeled out, then immediately slammed on the brakes for some reason, giving me my first taste of whiplash. Sage nearly toppled over. I realized she was having trouble fitting her long legs in the backseat, and I wondered why she wasn’t riding shotgun. Only when I saw Rob awkwardly drape his arm over Tammi’s shoulder did I realize what was going on. I grinned internally. So Tammi was sneaking out with a guy, too! So much for her high-and-mighty attitude.

“So, where are we going?” I asked. Not much was open in Boyer this late.

“Let’s head out to the rock quarry,” suggested Rob. He started to massage Tammi’s neck, which apparently distracted him from driving. After crossing the yellow line and nearly plowing head-on into a van, he kept both hands on the wheel.

Sage took several deep breaths to avoid hyperventilating. “Why don’t we just go to the park?”

Veterans Park was on the outskirts of Boyer (anything not actually on the town square was the outskirts). It boasted a war memorial, some decrepit playground equipment, and a baseball diamond. When Jack and I were in junior high, the cops constantly used to bust us for skateboarding in the parking lot. The year we entered high school and lost interest, the city installed a half-acre skating facility.

Rob managed to park across three spaces in the empty lot, then left with Tammi to go on the creaking swings. Sage sat on a park bench and patted the seat next to her.

The town council wouldn’t pay to keep the park lit up at night, so we sat silently for a bit, waiting for our eyes to adjust.

“Sorry I had to bring Tammi and Rob,” Sage said after a while. “Mom wanted me to chaperone.”

I didn’t say anything, but my mind was racing. Sage’s mom knew Tammi was out on a date? Then why did Sage have to sneak out to the movies with us the other night? If her parents let their fifteen-year-old daughter go on dates, why didn’t they allow her older sister to just hang out with a boy?

The groaning of the rusty swings stopped. Sage squinted blindly into the darkness, trying to see what her sister was doing.

“Is Rob an okay guy?” she asked, worried.

“Yeah. I don’t know him that well, but I haven’t heard anything bad about him.”

Sage was squirming in her seat. “That doesn’t mean anything.”

“You really aren’t from a small town. Trust me, if he’d done any shit, everyone would know.”

Sage giggled. “Damn, I have to get used to living in BFE. Tammi didn’t really date at her last school. She said all the boys …”

Sage suddenly stopped. I could see her braces reflect the dim moonlight as she gritted her teeth. She hadn’t meant to let that slip.

“Sage?”

She didn’t answer.

“Sage?” I insisted. “Tammi went to public school? Why didn’t you? And how come she’s allowed to go on dates?”

Sage shifted on the bench until her broad back was toward me. I think she was tired of my questioning, but I wasn’t going to let it drop. There was something weird going on at her home.

“Hey, talk to me.”

“Fine.” She swiveled and faced me. She was smiling, but it was sort of a cruel smirk. “Tim told me you just broke up with someone. Do you feel like talking about
that
?
”

I scooted away. “No, I really don’t.” Why would she bring that up?

Sage scooted after me. We were now both scrunched on the extreme left side of the bench. I was in danger of falling off. Sage leaned over to me.

“Then you understand that there are some things I don’t want to discuss, either. Could we just leave it at that for now?” Her smile was friendly again.

“Okay.” My mind was racing. What the hell was the big deal? Why had Sage been homeschooled all those years? Maybe she’d done something bad—broken the law and wound up in juvie for half a year, so her parents kept her at home. Or what if she’d gotten pregnant when she was, like, twelve, and her parents yanked her out of school so she could have the baby … or an abortion. That would explain why she wasn’t allowed to date. Or she could be HIV positive. Or …

“Logan, whatever you’re imagining, it’s not that bad.”

“Okay, but you’ve got to admit—”

“Shut up.”

There was a pause, and then we both laughed. We hadn’t moved apart on the bench, and we were close enough that Sage’s face was clearly visible in the darkness, just a little above mine. The night was cool, and I could see our breaths mingling. I could even make out the freckles on Sage’s nose. Her bright lipstick and shiny braces. Her doubly pierced ears. And the steam from our breathing continued to get heavier and closer.

A dark figure suddenly lunged at us from the darkness. Before I could react, it had slammed between us into the bench, almost knocking me to the ground. The attacker’s hand grabbed at both of us, reaching for our necks, attempting to subdue both of us at the same time.

It was Tammi. She wedged herself in the middle of the bench, a friendly arm around each of us. Rob was approaching across the gravel playground looking rather disappointed. Maybe the moment had been ruined for him, too.

“Time to go home,” ordered Tammi. I couldn’t read
Sage’s expression over her sister’s head. Not only did Sage’s parents not want her to date, but neither did her little sister. Tammi was chaperoning Sage, not the other way around.

But Sage had told me she wasn’t going to answer any questions. As curious as I was, you don’t badger your friends when they don’t want to talk. Sage hadn’t known me that long. Once she realized she could trust me, I felt sure she’d open up.

I never dreamed Sage’s secret was about to become my secret, or how desperate we’d both be to keep it.

I
T NEVER FAILED
to amaze me how the one sizable tree in our yard could produce so many leaves. Fall after fall, I’d end up raking ten bags or so. I dumped the last load into the charred oil drum at the rear of our property, squirted some lighter fluid, and dropped a match. The pleasant smell of burning leaves filled the air.

Thanksgiving was the next day. Jack was in Iowa, celebrating with his extended family. Tim was probably sitting in front of his parents’ stove, watching the turkey and drooling. There were never any leftovers at his house. Sage was vague when I asked her about her plans. She said she didn’t visit her grandparents anymore, but she didn’t elaborate. She told me she might call if she got bored.