Alone (18 page)

“Jules.”

I crack one eye and look around the room groggily. I can’t quite focus on my surroundings.

“What time is it?” I ask mid-yawn.

Roman sits next to me on the bed and brushes the hair off my forehead. I blink. Something is different. His cheeks are flushed and his eyes bloodshot.

“Um…” He rubs the back of his neck and blinks a few times. “It’s a little after one.”

I bolt upright and throw the covers aside. “You’ve been drinking.”

“Mac’s birthday.” He gives me a half-smile.

“I know, Viki told me. Why didn’t you tell me you wouldn’t be at school?”

“I told you last night.”

“I think I’d remember that.”

The corner of his mouth twitches. “You must have been asleep. It was after things had
settled down
…”

He wiggles his eyebrows, and my cheeks flush as I remember last night. His mouth on mine, his body pressed against me…how close we came. My insides burn and my body heats up, and suddenly I don’t feel like talking anymore.

“You’ll have to make it up to me…” I say, sucking my bottom lip into my mouth.

The tiny smile disappears, and Roman’s eyes flash as he grabs me and presses his lips to mine. It feels like the sun explodes and ignites our bodies, and I’m dangerously close to burning alive. And I will love it.

Roman’s hands burn a path across my skin, and I quiver under his touch. I could live a thousand lives and never feel this way again. Hours, days, weeks pass, and time loses all meaning, but in the midst of it all, I somehow come to my senses.

All day I’ve wanted to talk to Roman.

I pull back, panting. “Roman.”

He scoots away so fast it makes my head spin. “I’m sorry. Are we moving too fast?”

I almost laugh. Too slow is more like it. “No, it’s not that. I just—I wanted to tell you that I’ve decided to leave with you.”

“Really?” He tries to flick the hair out of his face, but it’s sweaty and matted to his forehead, so I brush it aside for him.

When I nod, his brown eyes sparkle. My heart pounds so hard I’m certain this will finally be the end of me. I can’t find words, can’t do anything but stare at him.

Roman leans forward and kisses me on the forehead. His lips linger, and I close my eyes, breathing him in. He smells like tobacco and the woods, with a hint of the ocean. My heart swells and aches and pounds harder than a thousand earthquakes. He moves his lips down my face, over my cheek and chin, down my neck. The ache spreads through my body again. Every inch of me craves Roman. He’s right here but still not close enough.

His mouth moves back up my chin and over to my ear, and his lips brush tenderly against my skin as he whispers, “I love you.”

I shiver and die, then explode into a million pieces. My life will never be the same.

“I love you, too.”

Chapter Twenty

Caught

I wake with Jules’s body tangled around mine, and it’s the most amazing experience of my life. But I’m hot and sweaty. The South Carolina humidity has snuck up on us again, and it suddenly feels more like August than October. I thought for sure we’d seen the last of the hot days until spring. Guess I was wrong.

I’ve never stayed with Jules until morning before, but I don’t move. She’s still asleep, and I don’t want to wake her. Not yet. Her face is smooth, and none of the worry usually lining her mouth is present. I imagine this is how she would look if her mom hadn’t died and if there were no zombies.

Of course, if that had happened, we wouldn’t have met.

My heart thumps as I study her peaceful face. I hadn’t meant to tell her I love her, not yet. Only, it had felt so right, and I didn’t lie. I do love her. With every fiber and inch of myself, inside and out.

I brush her hair away from her face, unable to move. I could wake her with a kiss…but pushing my luck may not be the best idea. I barely had the self-control to stop last night, and having her warm skin against mine first thing in the morning is making me slightly dizzy. I’m not sure I’ll be able to do it again.

The doorknob jiggles and I look up, but I can’t move. The door starts to open, and my heart pounds harder than a bass drum. I need to move. To hide or run or something! But I don’t have a the chance to move an inch before the door is open and Jules’s father is standing in the doorway.

“Shit,” I mutter, still unable to move.

Jules stirs next to me, but she doesn’t wake. Jon’s eyes get huge, then darken as they move from me to his daughter. His whole body is so rigid when he heads toward me that the only thing I can think about is Rick. My stomach drops, and I scramble to untangle myself, but the sheets are wrapped around me so tightly that I end up falling on my ass next to the bed.

Jules bolts upright. Her eyes move to me, sprawled out on the floor, then to her dad, who is still charging my way. She’s out of the bed in a second, putting herself between her father and me. But he pushes her aside, so hard she slams into the bed. When her body bounces against the mattress, it snaps me out of it.

I’m on my feet when her father reaches me. My shoulders are straight and my head is high. He’s breathing so heavily that his shoulders heave. His face is bright red.

“Get your hands off my daughter!” His teeth are clenched so tightly that it comes out muffled.

“I’m not touching your daughter,” I say, unable to hold in a smirk. Sometimes, being a smart-ass is my only defense.

His head jerks to the side like he’s so angry it’s created a nervous tic. When his hand lashes out, I flinch and wait for a punch that I know is coming, but instead his hand wraps around my forearm. His fingers tighten, digging into my flesh, and I have to fight back the urge to hit him. He yanks me forward, toward the door, and I don’t even fight it. It’s not like I don’t deserve to be dragged out of here on my ass.

We’ve only made it two steps before Jules is at her father’s side, pulling on his arm. “Let go of him. He didn’t do anything. Nothing happened!”

Jon stops moving and turns to face his daughter, his fingers still digging into my arm. “Nothing happened? He was in my teenage daughter’s bed!”

His whole body shakes, but I can’t take my eyes off Jules.

A mask of calm loathing comes over her face, transforming her right before my eyes. “You can’t pick and choose when you’re going to be my father. You ignore me most of the time and then swoop in with rules whenever you want! That’s not how it works.”

Jon’s eyes brush over her, but he doesn’t show any sign of understanding. He doesn’t even acknowledge that she’s spoken before he turns to look at me. “This is breaking and entering.”

Jules clenches her jaw. “You can’t use your position like that.”

“Watch me.”

He jerks me forward, pulling me out of the room. I’m not wearing anything but a pair of shorts, but he doesn’t seem to care and I don’t bother fighting him. Not when he drags me down the stairs and into the garage. Not when he twists my hands behind my back and the cold metal of handcuffs is slapped against my wrists. It’s not the first time.

“Roman!”

Jules runs into the garage just as her father forcefully shoves me into the backseat of his car. I flash her a smile, but it’s strained and there’s no way it will help relax her. I don’t give a shit about the fake arrest or that Rick will find out or the beating that’s sure to come. I don’t even care that I’m probably facing a few more days in a cell. I only care that Jules is crying.

“Don’t leave this house,” her father says through clenched teeth.

Then he climbs into the driver’s seat and slams the door. He backs out of the garage and down the driveway as Jules runs after us. I twist in my seat only to find her standing in the driveway, her face streaked in tears.

Her father doesn’t speak to me, but glaring at me in the rearview mirror apparently isn’t above him. When he drives past the clubhouse that doubles as a jail, dread builds in my stomach. The closer we get to the town hall, the more painful the pain gets. Not only is everyone in town going to see me get dragged into town hall wearing handcuffs, but Rick is going to have a say in my punishment. Perfect.

When my eyes meet Jon’s, the glare he shoots at me is so intense I’m surprised I don’t burst into flames. “Don’t think your father can get you out of this. Regulator or not, the Judicial Officer has the power when it comes to legal matters these days.”

I look away when my gut twists. “He wouldn’t even if he could. He’s not exactly the warm, fuzzy type.”

“Maybe if he’d had a different son.”

“Fuck you,” I spit, still staring out the window.

Giving him attitude isn’t going to win me any points, but I don’t give a shit. This guy has no idea who I am or what I’ve been through. He only knows Rick’s version of events.

It may be Saturday, but I’m not surprised that Rick’s car is parked in front of the town hall when we pull onto the street. I knew it would be.

Jon hits the brakes so hard I lurch forward and my face slams into the back of his seat. I’m still dazed when the back door opens and he pulls me out. There are people all over the place. Shopping. Hanging out. Trading. They all seem to stop at once and turn our way, gaping at me as Jon drags me toward the building in nothing but a pair of shorts. My scalp prickles even though I tell myself not to let it get to me. I spot Carmen and Mac standing by a booth of clothing, staring at me just like everyone else. Mac shakes his head. He can probably guess what happened based on my lack of clothing and my escort. Plus, Mac knows me too well.

The front door opens before we’re even halfway up the stairs, and Roz steps out. Why the hell would Roz be here on a Saturday? If I had to guess, I’d say it was because karma wanted to kick me in the balls just one more time.

“Get the Regulator,” Jules’s dad says as we walk past her.

Roz stands there long enough to shoot me an evil glare before turning to run up the stairs.

Jon shoves me into a chair, but I’ve barely had time to adjust to a more comfortable position before Roz is back. Rick is right behind her.

A smug smile crosses my father’s face. “What did he do now?”

“Breaking and entering,” Jon says, then glances my way. “Possibly rape.”

My stomach tightens, and even though I want to argue, I clamp my teeth together to keep my mouth shut. He won’t be able to make it stick, but just hearing him say it makes me want to kick him in the balls. He knows it isn’t true.

“Rape?” Rick’s eyebrows go up. He knows it’s a load of bullshit, but it won’t save me.

“Found him in my daughter’s bed this morning. I haven’t had a chance to talk to her yet, but she was pretty hysterical when I left.” Jon doesn’t even look at me this time. He’s really pushing it, and I don’t have a damn clue how he thinks he’s going to pull this bullshit charge off. No way is Jules going to back him up.

Rick frowns, but I don’t miss the satisfaction flashing in his eyes. “Well, you’re Judicial Officer, what would the normal sentence be for these charges?”

“He’s going to spend the weekend in lockup until I can get the details sorted out. If he’s done what I think he’s done, we’ll get him shipped off to D.C. later in the week.”

I stare at the floor while the two men discuss my sentence and the possible rape of the JO’s daughter. There’s so little emotion surrounding the whole thing that anyone listening might think they were robots. Rape is one of the few charges that can’t be handled by the sanctioned settlements, so if by some miracle Jon actually manages to charge me, I’ll be on my way to D.C. for sentencing. These days, justice is quick and punishments are severe.

Which means I could be looking at the death sentence.

When they finish talking about me like I’m not even sitting in front of them, Rick heads back to his office without saying a damn word to me. The whole thing probably sounds like a great solution to him. Send me off to D.C., where I get a quick trial followed by banishment or the death sentence. I’ll be out of his hair, and he can live out the rest of his life as the hero Regulator of Coastal Manor.

What an ass.

Chapter Twenty-One

Settled

My hands are shaking so hard it takes me three tries to get my bra hooked. Or maybe it’s because I’m trying to put my shoes on at the same time. I could even blame it on the tears clouding my vision. I don’t know and I don’t care. All I know is that I need to get dressed so I can get out of here. So I can find Roman.

I blink the tears back for what feels like the millionth time, but they don’t stop coming, and the hysteria creeping on up on me feels like it’s going to choke me. It’s going to be okay, though. I know it. My father is essentially a reasonable man. Once he calms down, he’ll see that he can’t lock Roman up just because he doesn’t want us dating. Roman hasn’t done anything wrong.

But I can’t stop crying. My breaths are coming out as hiccups by the time I have a shirt on and am hurrying down the hall. I can barely see.

Get it together, Jules!

I don’t have car, so the second I get outside, I start jogging. I’ve never been a runner, but the adrenaline and fear keep me going. Down the street and out onto the main road. People drive by and stare—probably because I’m sobbing—but no one stops to help or ask if I’m okay. Not that I care.

I’ve made it halfway through town when a car passing me slows and turns my way. I jump back, thinking it’s going to hit me, but when it pulls up alongside me the passenger window rolls down, revealing Mac.

“Do you need a ride?” Carmen asks from the driver seat, leaning over Mac so she can get closer to me.

I wipe my tear-stained face. “Yes! My dad took Roman and I need to find him, but I have no idea where—”

“He took Roman to the clubhouse,” Mac says. It’s the first time I’ve been around him since we met that he isn’t smiling. It makes him look older.

Carmen points behind her. “Hop in the back.”

I scurry to open the back door, sucking in a deep breath as I try to get my emotions under control. I’ve always been quick to cry. When I’m mad or frustrated or even happy, I can’t stop the tears from sneaking up on me. It’s one of those things that is utterly impossible for me to keep in check.

Once I’m in, Carmen does a U-turn in the middle of the road, then heads back the way she came.

We sit in silence for less than thirty seconds before she glances back at me. “Your dad’s accusing him of rape.”

“Rape?” My voice shakes and my stomach turns inside out. I can’t wrap my mind around the word. It’s ridiculous, and my father knows it. I never dreamed he’d stoop this low.

Mac snorts and shakes his head. “Roman may be a delinquent, but he’s not a rapist. Everyone knows that.”

“But he’ll be branded one anyway.” Carmen looks back at me again, raising an eyebrow. “You know that’s why he’s doing this, right? Just to give Roman the reputation. There’s no way to make it stick, but with the way the judicial system is now, Roman only needs one more strike against him and he’s out.”

Bile rises in my throat, but I swallow it down. She’s right. “Roman didn’t rape me. We didn’t even have sex.”

When Mac glances back at me, there’s a look of genuine surprise on his face. I guess I’m the first girl Roman ever spent the night with but didn’t screw. Not that I’m really all that surprised.

“Never thought he did,” Carmen says. “I’ve known Roman for a long time, he’s a good guy. I’d be dead if it wasn’t for him…” Her voice catches in her throat, and when her eyes meet mine in the rearview mirror, they’re shimmering with tears.

I didn’t know Roman and Carmen knew each other before. I’d assumed they were like everyone else here. None of them seem to have any real history before this. They went to the same school and maybe even passed each other in the halls, but that’s it.

“He didn’t tell me that,” I whisper.

Carmen nods and gives a little sniff. “Roman was friends with my younger brother. Since his dad is a total ass, he spent a lot of time at our house. Anyway, he didn’t go home after the virus hit. My parents died, then James. For a while it was just Roman and me. He didn’t have any intention of ever looking for his dad, but then the dead came back and things got bad. Eventually we had to find a safer place, so we made our way here. Roman’s father had already set this place up.” She shakes her head like the memories are too much for her. “I owe Roman my life.”

Carmen turns into the clubhouse parking lot and pulls into a spot, and we all climb out. My eyes meet hers, and I almost reach out to hug her. She looks as worried as I feel.

There’s a desk set up just inside the door, and an older woman sits behind it. Men and women wearing silver badges on their shirts walk around the building, carrying weapons and joking around like the whole world hasn’t gone insane. I spot Kyle on the other side of the building and turn away so he doesn’t know I saw him. He’s the last person I want to talk to right now. Okay, maybe not the last. My dad and the Regulator top that list.

The woman at the desk looks up when we walk in, but she doesn’t smile. She’s short and plump, and has salt-and-pepper hair that’s cut to her chin. Her bangs are so long that her eyelashes brush against them when she blinks.

She looks us over briefly, her eyes settling on Carmen. Still, though, she doesn’t smile. “Hello, Carmen. How are you today?”

Carmen smiles, but her body is tense and straight. “Hi, Jean. We came in to check on Roman.”

Jean purses her lips as she gives Carmen a stern look before turning to give Mac and me the same disapproving glare. “You need to stay away from that boy, he’s trouble. How he came from the Regulator I’ll never know, but it’s just too bad. The heartache Roman has caused that wonderful man…” She shakes her head and makes a little
tsk, tsk
sound.

My throat tightens as the tears I had finally managed to get under control spring to my eyes all over again. It’s so unjust. This woman judging Roman. All the stuff he’s been through and put up with at the hands of the man who is supposed to protect him!

More than anything, I want to lash out. To spill the beans and lay it all out for this judgmental woman. I want her to feel bad for the things she’s said and for standing behind a monster. Only I can’t, for two reasons. One, I know that deep down it would take more than a couple words from me to make this woman understand. Two, Roman wouldn’t want me to do it. So I do the right thing and clamp my mouth shut, keeping the words inside.

“This has all been a misunderstanding, Jean,” Carmen says, her voice much too calm, considering the situation.

I glance her way out of the corner of my eye and notice how tense her body is. Her hands are clenched at her sides, and it looks like her temper is just barely in check at the moment. Silently, I wish she’d lose her cool and tell this woman exactly how it is.

“He’s been accused of breaking and entering at the new Judicial Officer’s house” —Jean leans forward and lowers her voice to just barely a whisper— “and rape.”

Carmen points a shaky finger at me, and this time her voice is hard and slightly deadly. “
This
is the Judicial Officer’s daughter.”

Jean’s eyes get big and wide, and she gets halfway to her feet, her face drawn tight with concern. “Oh you poor thing! Are you okay?”

I flinch away from her. She may be trying to comfort me, but I don’t want it because it’s for all the wrong reasons. “Roman didn’t do anything wrong.” I almost throw in how my father knows it but decide against it.

Jean frowns, and her blue eyes narrow on my face, burning into me. Judging me. “But he was in your room?”

Mac makes a tiny sound in the back of his throat, and Jean’s eyes snap his way. She frowns even more and then looks us all over like we’re a group of prostitutes masquerading as everyday citizens. I want to tell her to mind her own business. That things are different now than they were a hundred years ago when she was a teenager, but I keep my mouth shut. It’s impossible not to squirm under the woman’s disapproving gaze, though.

“Can we see him?” Mac asks.

“No.” Jean’s eyes turn back to me. “Mr. Carmichael’s getting the paperwork ready so he can file formal charges.”

What? There’s no way I can keep my mouth shut now!

“Roman didn’t do anything,” I say, stepping closer to Jean’s desk. My voice shaking more with each word, echoing through the building. “I let him in my room and I asked him to stay with me!”

Everyone in the place stops what they’re doing and turns my way. I bite the inside of my cheek as my face heats up, trying to keep it together so I can get Roman out of this ridiculous mess.

“I want to talk to my father,” I say as firmly as I can manage. It comes out sounding like I’m begging.

Jean raises her eyebrows and points to a couch behind me. “Take a seat. I’ll let him know you’re here.”

Carmen and Mac follow me to the couch, and the three of us sit down in silence. Most people have gone back to whatever they were doing before my outburst, but Kyle is still staring at me. His face is red, which makes no sense. It must have more to do with Roman than me, because all Kyle and I have is that one walk on the beach and I never encouraged him.

I turn so my body is facing Carmen. “Jean seems…”

“She’s a judgmental bitch,” Carmen says, “and the town gossip, so even if you hadn’t screamed it out everyone would have known.”

Great.

“So you may as well just go ahead and have sex with Roman,” Mac says, winking, “because everyone’s going to think you have anyway.”

I almost laugh. Almost. Mac’s humor helps lessen the tension in my body, but I’m not quite ready to joke around. Not when I don’t know what’s going to happen to Roman.

“Roman helped get you laid, so now you think you’re going to help him?” Carmen says it so casually that my mouth falls open.

Mac, on the other hand, turns bright red. He shrugs it off though, saying, “Give a penny, take a penny.”

Carmen snorts.

Jean comes back a few seconds later, and my father is right behind her.

“I thought I asked you to stay at home,” he says, his tone colder than usual.

I guess he can stomach me when I’m his invisible teenage daughter, but now that he realizes I might actually be a human being, he doesn’t know what to do with me.

“I want to see Roman. He didn’t do anything wrong,” I say, getting to my feet. “I let Roman in, and I asked him to stay.
Me
.”

My father’s jaw tightens, and I flinch away as the crazy thought that he’s going to hit me slams into me.

“He’s eighteen,” he says, his voice completely monotone. “He was in the bed of a minor. Whether he broke in or not, he had no right.”

Heat sweeps over me, and this time it has nothing to do with embarrassment. “Are you going to throw everyone in jail who has sex? What century is this?”

“Mac’s only seventeen and I’m eighteen,” Carmen says from behind me. “You going to arrest me too?”

My father flinches, and Jean shoots Carmen a look that screams
slut
.

“If his parents file charges.”

Mac laughs. “Man, my mom was so cool about it. All this end-of-the-world bullshit has really changed her perspective on life.”

“You have to let Roman go,” I say, ignoring the other two even though I know they’re trying to help me. This is between my dad and me. There has to be a way to get through to him.

“You can go now. I’ll give my daughter a ride home,” my father says, ignoring me as he addresses Mac and Carmen.

“What about Roman?” Carmen asks.

“He’ll have to spend the weekend in jail. I’ll talk to the Regulator.” My father grabs my arm and pulls me with him as he heads down the hall.

“He doesn’t have any clothes,” I call over my shoulder to Mac.

He nods just before my father drags me around the corner.

He doesn’t let go of me until we’re in an empty office. His hand falls away as he turns to shut the door. My heart starts pounding like crazy, but there are so many emotions surging through me right now that I have a difficult time narrowing them down.

When my father turns to face me, the frown on his face is sad. Not angry. “Juliana, I’m your father. You have to stop treating me like this.” Despite the gloom in his eyes, his voice comes out flat and emotionless.