Always Be Mine~ (21 page)

“
You had seen my father today?” I squeaked.

“
MmHmm.” Matthew said, nodding his head up and down as he climbed up between my legs, running his cock between my bare, extremely wet folds, making me push the back of my head into the pillow as he guided his hard cock to my opening.

“
Now, can we continue where we left off, because I need to be inside of you before I explode?” Matthew declared.

“
I absolutely love you with all my heart Matthew.” I whispered into his lips that hovered over mine, as I pulled his face closer to mine with my hands cupped on either side of his face.

“
That’s good because you already said yes, so now you are stuck with me.” he said as he entered me slowly only to thrust deep inside once he entered me.

“
Mine.” He grunted as he pulled himself out and grounded himself back into me.

“
Every beautiful square inch of you is mine.” He grunted again as he moved quicker, pulling and pushing back into me making me thrash around underneath him.

“
Yes, more Matthew, harder. Please.” I mewled out.

Chapter 21 ~ Matthew

We laid wrapped in each others arms after a couple hot and heavy rounds of crazy passionate love making.

I can
’t imagine Emma would worry about such a crazy thing like me not loving her or wanting to look at her if she had to have her breasts removed. My crazy baby doll is all I could think.

After I filled her in on our plans for the week, going to see her father first, then off to introduce her to my crazy sisters, and finally stop over at my parents for a couple days.

We did get the call from the Dr. on our way to see my parents on our flight down to Florida.

Thank God, it was stage 1 only. Emma got regular annual check ups so they caught this early on. We were both relieved.

Once we laid everything out for our families on the happenings of what Emma’s plans were for radiation, and treatment, we began planning our life out together. Wedding details, I could have cared less about, this conclusion I finally came down to after I just decided to hand over the check book and my black Amex card. I gave up worrying about goofy details. She could have whatever made her happy. If she’s happy, then I get to be happy.” So I finally told her, “Look, I’ll be where ever you want me to meet you. I’ll be the one in the front of some sort of gathering or alter, the one wearing the best looking tux of course. I’ll look for you wearing white, as long as you say I do, the sky is the limit for you to plan Em. Go nuts.” I told her.

That was apparently the correct answer because I have had mind blowing oral sex performed on me every night ever since I uttered those words to her.

She keeps up these mind blowing nights, shit she can keep the checkbook and all the God damn cards for all care. I laugh to myself. Like that would even matter. Em has me wrapped around her baby finger so tight; she could have anything without mind blowing sex. However, the sex is a nice bonus that I won’t complain about.

The following year we married on Sweetest Day. After finding out Em was pregnant, making my parents as well as her father, delirious. And me, praying every night it wasn
’t a girl because I would have to lock her in her room until she was at least forty. I could care what anyone thought about my one sided backwards thinking. No way was any man getting near any baby girl of mine.

I suppose I just cursed myself, teaching me a valuable lesson. Nine months later Emma gave birth to an 8lb, 7oz healthy, baby girl, we named Elizabeth Beverly Daniels. After both our mothers names. Lizzy, for short.

And the sleepless nights begin. I made a list of things necessary like a personal guard for Lizzy and two pad locks on her bedroom door. Em didn’t think I was neither serious, nor funny as she firmly pointed out several times.

Well, she has another thing coming if she thinks these are negotiable rules. Not happening. I
’ll just keep Lizzy’s security a secret until Em finds out herself. Just makes it easier to breathe for my peace of mind.

Life was perfect. I was truly blessed, had my little family. My two healthy girls. All I do is pray every night to keep them both safe. I look down on to my beautiful baby daughter, snuggled in between her mother and my body. Of course, Emma can
’t bear to let Lizzy sleep in the custom bed I had made personally for her. No, Emma assured me she needed to keep her close for her peace of mind. As for me, I can barely allow myself to fall asleep in the fear I might roll over Lizzy in the middle of the night.

Ugh, these two girls are going to be the death of me. But what a way to go, huh. Haha. Yep, life is good.

Emma ~ 5 years later.

“Mommy, Mommy, cooooome ooooon.” Lizzy sighed in deep exaggeration.

“
Which one of us, decided to teach her to talk?”  Matthew asked me as we finished getting ready for our special dinner with both families.

“
Hmm… I think it was you.” I told him as he came up behind me, wrapping his hands around my enormous belly.

“
This one however,” I told him rubbing my hand over his that lay gently on my very pregnant belly, “is NOT going to talk ever I hope. Besides if he is anything like his father, he won’t be able to sit still and stay quiet.” I said with a smirk, looking into the full length mirror with both of us in it.

“
You are so beautiful Emma. You take my breath away.” Matthew said to me, nuzzling into my neck.

All of a sudden, SLAM!
“And here she is our fearless warrior!” Matthew said to our little girl Elizabeth. Poor Lizzy, she stood at the door after she came into our bedroom, slammed the door and stayed in one place, without waiver with her little chubby arms cross over her little body. I giggled.

“
Mommy, why are we still here?” Lizzy asked, not expecting to like the answer.

“
Mommy was just ready to leave until I came over and started tickling Mommy.” Matthew said, picking Lizzy up into his arms and began to tickle her.

Lizzy laughed and squealed, trying to wiggle herself out of his arms.
“Daddy, that isn’t very nice of you. It’s Mommy’s special birthday.” She said as she pressed her chubby little hand against her face to push her long chestnut curly hair off her little angelic face that was currently disgusted in a little warrior expression.

I walk over to both of them smiling.
“Oooh, here, want to feel your little brother kicking?” I asked Lizzy, taking her stretched out eager hand and laid it on my belly with Matthew’s.

Lizzy
’s eyes got as cupcakes. “Mommy.” She whispered.

“
Isn’t that neat Lizzy?” Matthew asked her, winking at me.

Lizzy wrapped her tiny arms around Matthew
’s neck and then she pulled her face back to look into his.

I will never forget what she did next. Lizzy took her hands, and placed one on either side of her faces face. She pulled his face into hers
’, touching their noses together and said “I can’t
wait
to be a big sister daddy!” She said very seriously, and
stressed
the word WAIT.
I am positive at that moment, both Matthew’s and my heart both melted at her admission and innocence of saying such a wonderful thing.

“
Awe, Baby girl, you are going to be the very best big sister Nathan could ever ask for, you know that?” Matthew asked her while I smiled at them both, rubbing her little back. Lizzy nodded, very serious, “Yes Daddy, I do know that.” Making us both laugh at her honesty.

After we had a wonderful dinner at my father
’s little place, John was always included in our festivities, not because of him being someone we greatly depended on for my father’s health, but as a family member to all of us.

Lizzy convinced her
“Uncle John,” that he would look smashing in bubble gum pink nail polish and her princess crown. Poor John, he always went along with anything for our little Lizzy. I winked at them when I walked in the dining room.

The lights went dark, and all of a sudden everyone came in singing happy birthday to me. Lizzy came over and crawled on my lap. No doubt to help blow the candles out.
“Make a wish Mommy!” Lizzy squealed as she clapped her hands. I kissed Lizzy’s pink, glowing cheeks, and closed my eyes.
“Please God; let me stay here long enough to see my babies grow up.”
I opened my eyes, to see Matthew wink at me, making me smile. “Ok, I made my wish. Now, can you help me blow out the candles baby girl?” I asked her by her pet name her father gave her. After we blew out my five candles and one for good luck, we all ate the best cake John has ever made. Chocolate Fudge, with Dark Chocolate frosting, double thick. Yep, I made it five years cancer free. This was my five year anniversary, and I was so thrilled, still in remission. I just pray I stay this way for a very long time.

Epilogue

Matthew ~ 17 years after Emma’s 5
th,
birthday, cancer free.

For last two years, it had been a battle from the get go, for Emma. She always amazed me at how strong she always was and would run circles around all of us.

Lizzy was going to get back into college next fall. Since taking a break to be with her Mother, while Emma, battled her return bout of breast cancer. Nathan, I couldn
’t be more proud of. He asked his mother to be his date to the junior prom. She cried of course, and accepted with pure happiness shining in her eyes. Emma told our son that she finally got to go to a prom since she had not been to hers back in school, making it extra special for Nathan.

Prom was a month after we found out the cancer had returned with vengeance.

I sit with her in the cemetery today. Even though it has been a week since we lay my beautiful Emma to rest, I am still in shock. I still keep waiting to see her walk through the door, still thinking this is a twisted, terrible nightmare. Or to get that call we never received from the Dr.’s, telling us she went back into remission, I thought to myself, as I wiped a tear from my cheek.

I was so proud of my baby doll, Emma fought that evil cancer every step of the way. Not giving in, not even at the end, Emma fought. We were lucky that we had Emma home with us her last 6 months. The cancer had spread so badly, we all knew it was a matter of time. Luckily we had pain medication for her cope with everything her, barely there, body had gone through.

The night before she passed, Emma and I were laid in our bed, one last time together. I didn’t know at the time, that night was going to be our last night together. Although, I think Emma knew deep inside. I nearly wanted to throw myself in front of a moving bus when she asked me her grant her last dying wish. It was nearly impossible to keep myself from balling hysterically. So, of course, being as it may, I never could say no to my sweet Emma… We did make love that night, t

That one last time, in our bed, that we shared together our entire 22 years of marriage.

Emma had lost so much weight from all the chemotherapy, I was scared out of my mind I was going to crush her. I doubt that night, she weigh even 90 lbs. I dream back to that night, as I lay here with Emma now. I have a blanket lay out for a picnic, just me and my Emma. She asked me to have a picnic with her on her first week anniversary of her passing. After which she tried to make me swear to move on with my life and to enjoy myself. HA! Well, she
was
my
ENTIRE
life; I will never let her go. Like I told her from the first weeks we were together, I tried to appease her with a promise I knew I would never keep, and she told me she would haunt me if I didn’t. I pray she haunts me. It hurts to breathe now as it is. I am hopeful for that promise she made about haunting me, it’s all I have now.

Don
’t get me wrong, I am so relieved she no longer suffers as she did for so long, but her suffering ended, and mine doesn’t. I promised I wouldn’t stay grumpy or withdrawn from our children’s lives. Still doesn’t make my heart stop breaking every minute I am awake, and even in my dreams at night, that’s if I actually sleep.

After we made love that last time, we talked until the sun came up on her last day with us.

“Thank you for giving me such a beautiful life, Matthew. I have everything I always ever wanted and with you to share it with. Every wish I had, God granted me. I don’t have one, single regret.” She softly said looking into my watery eyes, with hers freely draining tears.

John tapped on our bedroom door, having Emma
’s meds ready for her and some tea. Since Emma’s father passed away 7 years prior, John was happy to see how badly he was needed with us. Luckily for us, he graciously accepted and Emma threw him a party to celebrate. I am grateful her father wasn’t still around to witness what his little girl had to endure, what she had. I think if her father were still alive, that would have killed her sooner.