I laugh at his charm and how he stumbles over his words and how he says he so badly wants to see me. What do I do? I know what I do. I reach in and grab my new 'Harlow balls' and because I in turn want to see him so badly, I make a suggestion.
"Well, we don't necessarily have to cancel, ya know." And I wait for him to ask why. A split second later, "Really? And why is that?"
"Does Henry like pizza?"
"Yes, he does." Daniel answers with more of a questioning response.
"Give me your address. You supply the beer, and I'll grab the pizza. I already know he likes ice cream, so let's keep our date. We'll just turn it into a half-a-double date."
I hear him laugh and smack his lips together. "A half-a-double date?"
"Sure. Unless Henry has his favorite teddy bear to join us, then yes, half-a-double date."
"I like the sound of that. I'll see you tomorrow?"
"At seven."
"Harlow?"
"Yes, Daniel."
"I’m glad we are half double-dating."
I smile into the phone. "Me too."
***
So I didn't return the dress, I'll use it at a later date, but I did buy a new pair of jeans and shirt. I say screw it. I never shop and this new-found fashion sense of mine has me excited. I go to my favorite pizza shop, pick up pizza and then go to Riley's Ice Cream Shop and grab a few to-go dishes. Chocolate for Henry, and strawberry for Daniel and me.
I follow the directions Daniel gave me to his house. I pull up to an adorable cape-cod style home, with white with blue shutters and a tiny front porch. I see some of Henry's toys scattered in the front yard. A little football, a wagon, and a huge bouncy ball. I rub my hands on my jeans, nervously biting my lip and checking my face in the mirror. I smooth out my hair then quickly stick it up in a ponytail. I suddenly feel the need to give myself a pep talk.
Okay, Harlow. This is it. Just go ahead and whatever happens, happens. You can do this. You want to spend time with him, with Henry, so just go and have a good time. He wants to see you, badly. Badly. And so do you.
I grab the pizza box and the bag of ice cream, leaving my crutch in the car. I don't even get a chance to knock on the door when it opens and I see Daniel holding Henry in his arms, both of the handsome men smiling broadly at me.
"Good evening, Miss Hannum. Henry, say hello to Miss Hannum."
Henry is sort of buried in Daniel's shoulder wearing
Sponge Bob
pajamas, but he peers up with one eye and addresses me in the sweetest little voice, "Good evening, Miss Hannum. Did you bring me pizza?"
I laugh and Daniel corrects him, 'Henry, that's impolite."
"That's okay. And yes, Henry, I did bring pizza and also a special treat if you eat all your dinner." His head pops up and his eyes go wide. He makes an 'O' face at Daniel, and Daniel does so in return. He puts Henry down and the small boy takes my hand and pulls me quickly into the house. Daniel rolls his eyes and I shove the pizza box and bag of ice cream in his hands.
The house is quite modest. Dark hardwood floors and the walls are a lovely shade of taupe and tan. It's clean and orderly with the exception of some toys out and about in the living room. Cartoons play on the TV.
Henry tugs at my hand. "Miss Hannum, wanna see my room?" I look up at Daniel who looks relaxed and freaking hot in his faded jeans and baby blue T-shirt, which hugs his slender body accentuating it in
all
the right places.
He nods to us. "Sure, go ahead and I'll dish out the pizza." He winks at me and Henry leads me up a few steps to his room. The walls are painted a sky blue with stars, clouds and airplanes painted on the walls. A tiny bed with plenty of plush animals lay a top of it. He brings me over to look at his bookcase that rests against one of the walls. He pulls out a book. Shel Silverstein's,
The Giving Tree.
He hands it to me. "This is my favorite book of all time." He opens in front of me and points to the first page. "Daddy reads it to me every night. It's his favorite, too."
I struggle a bit but get down on the floor and sit with my legs crisscrossed. Henry assumes the same position.
"You know what, Henry? This is one of my favorites as well. Would you like me to read it to you?" He nods anxiously.
I begin to read the story to him and he rests his chin in his hand, resting his elbow on one knee, focused so intently like it's the first time he has ever heard it being read to him. I don't initially look up but I feel a presence in the doorway of Henry's room. I glance up and see Daniel standing there, leaning against the frame. His eyes are full of majestic wonder and the corners of his mouth inch up in a smile. I wink at him and go back to reading. When I’m finished, I hand the book back to Henry and he immediately goes to put it back on the bookshelf. He runs over to his bedside table and grabs a framed picture and brings it to me. Handing it to me, I see it's a picture of a small toddler in the arms of a beautiful raven-haired woman.
He points to it. "That is my mum. She has angel wings, you know." I look at it, my heart squeezing in my chest at the sight of this beautiful woman holding her precious boy. I feel such sadness but when Henry tells me about her wings, but there is no sadness in his voice, only excitement.
I look up to Daniel who has sadness in his eyes but still manages to watch us and smile.
"Yes, I know she does. Your daddy tells me she is a beautiful angel and you know the best part about her being a beautiful angel?" He shakes his head no.
"Well, the best part is she's your guardian angel and she looks down on you from Heaven and protects you with her wings."
He looks confused. "Protects me?"
"Sure. Like when you skin your knee and your daddy puts a band-aid on it and it only hurts for a few minutes after? Well that's your mommy's angel’s wings making the hurt go away." He grins at me like he gets it.
"I like that." I nod at him and hand the picture back to him.
"Me, too." He puts the picture back and runs out of the room yelling “pizza, pizza”. I try and get up and Daniel, without hesitation, has his hands on mine, pulling me up carefully off the floor to a standing position. I blow a piece of loose hair off my face and it flops down again. I didn't do a very good job of removing it from my face, but Daniel takes care of that. He reaches out with one of his long, slender fingers and tucks the hair behind my ear, sending a loopy-de-loop feeling right to my gut. I shiver realizing now after these past few weeks that I’m not shivering ’cause I’m cold. It's his touch. Even though warm and comforting, soft and soothing, it brings my whole body to life. Just the slightest of touches, just a simple, small gesture can make my body act like it's surrounded by a beautiful ice storm.
He grazes my cheek as he slowly and methodically takes his finger away.
I tuck my hands in my back pocket and bow my head. He raises my chin with his finger again that allows me to look right at him.
We stare. No words are spoken. Just bouncing smiles off each other until we hear Henry call for Daniel that he wants pizza.
"We, um, better get the little monster fed before he starts eating the wallpaper." He holds out his arm letting me go first out of the room, down to where Henry is waiting.
***
This is a house full of love, full of joy, and full of laughter. The three of us eat pizza, play a game or two of Memory with Henry, and eat our ice cream. Just watching the two of them together makes my heart sing with delight. They pretty much finish each other’s sentences. It amazes me the kind of bond they have. It's such a sight to see. I’m envious. I’m not an envious person but looking at them squeezes my heart and i’m reminded once again how Chad Knox took that away from me. It was my decision but his actions were the direct result of the decision I made.
I can see Henry growing tired as he rubs his eyes and yawns. Daniel gets up from the table and announces it's bed time for Henry. The child doesn't fuss, only grabs a small soft blanket off the end of the sofa. It looks tattered and worn, clearly used kindly and lovingly.
"Henry, wish Miss Hannum a goodnight, go brush your teeth, and I'll be right up to tuck you in and read our story, okay?" Henry nods and pulls Daniel's hand down so he can whisper something in his ear. Daniel motions to him toward me.
"Go ahead and ask."
"Miss Hannum, could you read the book to me again?"
"I'd be honored, Henry. Go brush your teeth first and I'll be right up."
He grins widely and sprints for the stairs.
Daniel stands at the bottom of the steps and stares up until he hears the sound of water being turned on. I go into the kitchen to collect the empty paper dishes and trash and find the trashcan to start disposing of them.
"Harlow, you are my guest. You really don't have to do that."
I turn to him smiling. "It's no big deal. I like it."
Henry calls to us that he's done so we make our way to his tiny room. The boy is already in his bed with his book waiting on his lap. Daniel makes him snuggle down into the sheets and he places his worn blanket next to him, cuddling it into the crook of his neck. Henry hands me the book and I begin to read the story again. Daniel lies next to Henry in the bed, leaning on his hand and I can tell he's watching me, intently. Six or seven pages in and Henry is fast asleep. A small snore coming from his tiny mouth.
Daniel whispers, "Wow, he must be exhausted because I always get to the end of the book." He pulls the covers up to Henry's chin and kisses the sweet boy on the forehead and we quietly leave the room. We creep down the hallway down the few steps leading to the living room.
I go back into the kitchen go to the sink and start to place cups and spoons in the sink.
"Harlow, let's do that later. Want to sit and talk now that it's quiet?"
Daniel motions for me to come and sit in the living room so I follow. He grabs two beers for us and hands me mine.
He takes his seat and leans back in a comfortable position and I can tell his body is now relaxed.
"You look exhausted," I say with a chuckle.
“Some days he just wears me out."
I’m on one end of the plush sofa covered in over-sized pillows and he is on the other end.
"He's an exceptional boy, Daniel. Very smart and witty for a kid his age."
He laughs. "He's his mother."
I turn to him over my shoulder. "But he's also a lot like you. I can see that. You finish each other's sentences. I watched you both and enjoy every second of it. He's very lucky to have you."
"Yes. I guess. I thank God Ally is here with me. I don't know what I would do without her."
"That's a big responsibility she has taken on. Lots of sacrificing I’m guessing."
He runs his hands through his hair, sighing, and rests his head back on the sofa.
"I think for Ally as well it had its advantages. She was in a horrible relationship with a guy who verbally and mentally abused her. I think us moving to America was a good option for her to take. He really did a number on her."
Daniel Mathewson makes you think. He makes it easy to talk, to open up, and in my mind I think about how Chad did the same to me.
"I can sympathize with her actually."
I have piqued his interest and he straightens up and turns his body toward me.
“I’m so sorry, Harlow. Please tell me more. Well, only if you feel comfortable talking about it."
I shrug. "It was in the past. It's fine now but it wasn't at the time."
"Old flame?" he asks.
"Chad. That's his name. I dated him all through high school. He on the other hand dated or should I say bedded others as well the entire time. I didn't know for a long time." Daniel looks stunned.
"And when I found out, each time that is, he'd come back begging for my forgiveness telling me all kinds of stuff to get me back and each time I fell for it. Over and over again."
Daniel watches me quietly, his expression telling me to continue.
"My parents believed in curfews, his did not. So he would bring me home when it hit curfew time then he would go and have his flavor of the week."
"Harlow, I’m shocked. You are such an intelligent woman. You didn't catch on earlier?"
"It had nothing to do with catching on. I was a teenager when it all started. It had to do with maturity. When the mind games started, when college began, I was too far gone."
"You went to college together?"
"And grew up together. Our families were very good friends. Both wealthy and because of the relationships between our families, it was hard for me to break it off. It's hard for someone who doesn't know the logistics to understand. Chad would tell me that if I dumped him I would never find anyone who would
want
me. That he would be the only one. He made me feel worthless."
He snaps his fingers and jumps in his seat.
"See that arsehole Ally was with did the same things to her. I’m a guy and sometimes even I don't understand why we do the things we do, how some can treat women the way they do."
I wonder that same thing to this day.
"You ever see him around?"
I snicker, "Not since May."
"Okay. Well what's the significance of May?"
When he asks, I point to my jean-clad legs.
"The scars on my legs? His doing."
Daniel shakes his head, confused. "Come again?"
"He was driving the boat that I was on that crashed."
His looks angry as he shakes his head and inches closer to me on the sofa.
"He what? You mean he crashed the boat you were on?"
I nod.
"He was drinking that night. He wanted to talk to me about getting back together and asked me to go on his dad's boat with him. I really don't know why I agreed to it because I have a great fear of water. After that, I have no idea what happened. All I know is I woke up six weeks later and there was a lot of confusion."
"Confusion?"
Cruz
. In a split second of time it hits me like a wrecking ball. I try and push the memory of waking up to Cruz being there out of my mind but…. I have a flash of a memory that scares me. My face must say it all. I can feel my eyes go wide and my heart speeds up.