Read An Enormously English Monsoon Wedding Online

Authors: Christina Jones

Tags: #Fiction, #General

An Enormously English Monsoon Wedding (14 page)

‘Now? Already? Blimey. He didn’t hang about. He must be keen.’

‘He is, and the sooner he gets here the better as far as I’m concerned,’ Jay said. ‘I’m turning away such a lot of large animal work, and I really could do with a second vet in that empty room in the surgery for the domestic animals too.’

Erin nodded, then stopped. ‘But unless he’s bringing his own, he’ll need another nurse, won’t he? And somewhere to live?’

‘We’ll advertise for a nurse if he needs one, but use the agency from Newbury for the time being and he can stop at the Merry Cobbler until he finds something more permanent. Why are you laughing?’

‘Because, when Kam rolls up, Sophie and Bella will think all their birthdays and Christmases have come at once.’

‘Lucky Kam – no, don’t glare at me like that. I managed to escape their clutches, didn’t I? And Kam’s far more used to being lusted after than I ever was. But if he makes good time, it’ll put paid to our cosy meal this evening.’

Bugger, Erin sighed. Then she smiled. ‘Oooh, I don’t
know. I think Florence and I could just about cope with having dinner with two devastatingly drop-dead gorgeous men.’

‘See?’ Jay shrugged. ‘You’re merely weeks away from being my wife, and even you are smitten by Kam.’

‘I’m not, actually.’ Erin grinned. ‘Kam’s far too much of a playboy ladykiller for me – even if I was interested, which I’m not. Why would I be? I’ve got you. Kam’s not a patch on you. You’re the most fabulously sexy man in the entire universe.’

‘Aw.’ Jay grinned. ‘You say the sweetest things.’

‘All true.’ Erin laughed. Then stopped. And groaned. ‘Oh – and the cosy dinner for two wouldn’t have happened anyway. We’d forgotten about Nalisha. She’ll be back tonight, won’t she?’

‘Don’t think so. I think she’s staying over. That’s why it would have been simply perfect and we could have sneaked away to your bedroom afterwards.’ He kissed her, very slowly. ‘Sod it – we’re free of Nalisha playing chaperone, and now we‘ve got Kam.’

‘That’s families for you. Always there when you want them, and even more so when you don’t.’

Jay laughed. ‘Too right. Oh, damn it, I’m really going to have to fly now, and I don’t want to go. I’ll see you later, and I love you.’

‘Love you too. Always.’

Erin sighed happily. It was all going to be OK.

Chapter Fifteen

‘Thanks for a great meal.’ Kam Keskar
smiled at Erin across the table in the garden of Doug’s cottage. ‘Exactly what I needed after the journey from hell.’

Dusk was falling, casting lilac shadows across the tiny lawn and the curved flower borders, and the air was still, warm and musky-sweet.

‘It was only a pasta salad, hardly Heston Blumenthal,’ Erin said, as Jay collected the plates and Florence entwined her grey silky body round the rickety wrought-iron chair legs looking for scraps.

‘It was a pasta salad fit for the gods. You’ll make someone a fantastic wife one day.’

‘Me,’ Jay laughed, leaning across the table towards his cousin. ‘Remember? In four weeks’ time. So don’t waste your time flirting with my fiancée.’

‘As if.’ Kam sighed. ‘You don’t happen to have any sisters, do you, Erin?’

‘No, sorry.’ Erin lifted Florence onto her lap. ‘And I can’t believe you’re ever short of female company. Last time we met you were, um, going out with your nurse.’

‘He’s always, um, going
out with his nurse,’ Jay chuckled, balancing the empty bowls on top of the plates. ‘Didn’t you bring the latest one with you? Was that Asha? Or Pakshi? Or – no – what was that fiery one called – Roshni?’

‘All old news.’ Kam stretched his long legs in faded jeans out in front of him. ‘I’ve wiped the slate clean. I shall start a fresh life here in Nook Green, with a fresh nurse, and –’

‘Do all your veterinary nurses have to be Indian?’ Erin asked. ‘Isn’t that a bit, well, insular at best and racist at worst?’

‘No way. It’s simply a coincidence that all the nurses I’ve had when you and Jay have been around, have been Indian.’ Kam laughed. ‘I’ve had nurses from every corner of the globe.’

‘He means that literally.’ Jay shook his head. ‘We’ll have to make sure the one he gets this time is Kam-proof. Maybe older, sort of comfy middle-aged, happily married with a nice little family. Totally immune to his dubious charms.’

‘Ah, but does such a woman exist?’ Kam smiled. ‘I haven’t met one yet. And, on the same subject, in my role of best man, I’m guessing I get first pick of the bridesmaids?’

‘No way. Hands off. Sophie and Bella are my oldest and bestest friends.’ Erin shook her head. ‘They don’t need their lives messed up by you.’

‘You are so boring.’ Kam grinned. ‘I suppose I’ll just have to find other diversions to keep me occupied.’

Erin let Florence slide to the ground, and peered suspiciously at Kam. ‘What sort of diversions? Nothing to do with our wedding?’

‘No, well, not directly.’ Kam leaned back in his chair. ‘Although the family has asked me to check on a few things.’

‘Oh, not again.’ Erin groaned so loudly
that Florence stopped trying to catch a moth in the herbaceous border and stared at her. ‘Not you as well? Once and for all – our wedding plans are in place, we’re having the marriage we both want, and there’s absolutely no point in you trying to say anything different.’

Kam laughed. ‘I’m not going to try and change anything – well, not much. It’s just that when Jay’s parents heard I was coming to live and work here, well, I was given some very specific instructions regarding the wedding rituals.’

‘Which I
do not
want to hear. OK?’

‘You’re really very beautiful when you’re fierce. You’re very beautiful anyway, of course, but when you’re angry your eyes really blaze – like turquoise diamonds.’

‘Bleugh.’ Erin made a throwing-up gesture. ‘Wasted on me, Kam, thanks all the same. Save all that crap for your hordes of devoted followers. And please, don’t think you can move into Nook Green and, like the rest of the family, try to reorganise our wedding, because you can’t.’

Kam laughed lazily, poured more wine for them both and topped up Jay’s glass. ‘OK, now just hear me out. As best man, I’m traditionally supposed to make sure Jay’s wedding has all the proper Hindu ceremonies. I also know none of this is what either of you want. But I’ve got an idea. No – don’t say anything. Just trust me and I’ll make sure family honour is satisfied, and you get the wedding day you want.’

‘How? Why?’

‘By being devious. And because if I was Jay, all this interference would drive me crazy.’

‘Really?’

‘Totally. I’d run a mile from the organised rituals and tradition and non-stop celebration. If I loved someone
enough to want to spend the rest of my life with them, then I’d make sure it was just me and her, and the rest of the world could go to hell.’


What
?’ Erin frowned. ‘But that’s exactly how we feel. So why on earth are you trying to force Jay into something you don’t even agree with?’

Kam laughed. ‘I’m not, believe me. That’s why I asked you to trust me while I work out a way to keep everyone happy.’

‘And that’s Mission Impossible.’

‘I can see it probably seems like that to you now. You must think that our family are suddenly determined to turn the happiest day of your life into some three-ring circus.’

‘Oh, yeah. Complete with clowns.’ Erin drained her glass.

Kam poured her another refill. ‘I know it must seem crazy to you, but it’s been instilled in us from birth to honour these deep-rooted traditions, along with a massive respect for our heritage. And for our parents, a marriage ceremony is the biggest event in
their
lives. In their eyes, this isn’t about Jay and you, this is about Indian family honour.’

‘Of course it’s about me and Jay! It’s our damn wedding! And Jay is
not
Indian – well, yes he is – but he’s also very, very British.’

‘We both are.’

‘Exactly. You were both born here, educated here, and live totally Western lives. Why the hell do you all think Jay’d want to revert to the traditions of a way of life he’s never known?’

‘I don’t.’ Kam shrugged. ‘I know he doesn’t. Which is why I’m on your side. But I’ve also got to keep Jay’s parents sweet.’

‘So you’re going to be a sort of double agent?’

‘Yeah, something like that.’

‘I still can’t see you
outwitting foxy Deena … Oh, sometimes I wish we could just forget the whole damn thing and run away and get married on some deserted beach in the middle of nowhere or something.’

Kam leaned back in his chair. ‘Which, in Jay’s place, is exactly what I’d do. I’ve always fancied eloping.’

‘Who’s eloping?’ Jay appeared from Doug’s cottage carrying a tray of fruit salad and bowls. ‘Anyone I know?’

‘Erin and I were just having a bit of a discussion about the wedding, and I said if I were in your shoes I’d run away from all the meddling,’ Kam said, reaching for the tray. ‘That’s all.’

Erin looked at Jay. ‘And I’ve told him it’s a topic that’s now closed. I think we’ve covered it enough for a lifetime.’

‘So do I.’ Jay sat down and took her hands across the table, then grinned at Kam. ‘So you can keep your mouth firmly shut regarding our wedding, OK?’

‘OK. But if you’d just hear me out, you’d realise that I’m not –’

Jay shook his head. ‘No – just butt out, Kam. We’ve both had more than enough. Now, as soon as we’ve finished here, we’ll go over to the Merry Cobbler and see if Gina can sort you out a nice single room until you can find a place of your own.’

Kam gazed at the cottage in the twilight and then lazily round Doug’s pretty country garden. ‘Can’t I stay here? Don’t you have a spare room for a totally knackered vet?’

‘No,’ Erin said quickly. ‘Sorry. Well, actually yes, there is a spare room, but my mum and dad are having it when they come over for the wedding. And they’re staying for two months – so sadly, no, there’s no room at the inn.’

‘Is that a biblical reference?’ Kam grinned. ‘Or are you telling me that I won’t find anywhere to sleep at the pub either?’

Erin pulled a face across the
table at Kam. ‘I wouldn’t dare make a biblical reference – you’d probably report me to Deena and Tavish for insurrection. And I don’t know if Gina has any rooms free at the Merry Cobbler. But –’ she smiled over her wine glass ‘– if she hasn’t, we could always book you into the Bates Motel.’

Jay laughed. ‘You wouldn’t wish that on him?’

‘Oooh, don’t tempt me.’

Kam frowned. ‘
The Bates Motel
? Seriously?’

‘Well, now Nalisha’s not staying there, we know there’s a vacancy.’

Kam looked at Jay. ‘Ah, yes. I’d heard the divine Nalisha was not only back in the UK but here in the village and living in your cottage. Is that for real?’

‘Sadly, yes,’ Erin said quickly, dispirited by the mention of the ‘N’ word. ‘And it’s something else I really don’t want to talk about.’

Jay and Kam exchanged ‘talk about it later’ looks across the table.

‘Anyway,’ Erin continued, ‘if you don’t lay off our wedding plans, we’ll take you to the Bates Motel by force and book you in for the duration.’

‘Please don’t.’ Kam spooned fruit salad into his bowl. ‘The pub sounds much nicer. I just wish you’d both trust me.’

Erin, now halfway down her umpteenth glass of wine, sighed. ‘No woman should ever trust you. You should come with a health warning. But, just for the record, we’re not having any sort of Indian pre-wedding parties – not for you, for Jay’s parents, or for the Maharajah himself. Last, final word.’

Chapter Sixteen

‘It’s a lovely room,’ Kam said,
smiling at Gina across the bar in the Merry Cobbler. ‘And a great price. Thank you so much.’

‘You’re more than welcome.’ Gina, still looking woebegone but clearly trying very hard not to show it, managed to smile back. ‘I’m glad you like it.’

‘Why wouldn’t he?’ Erin whispered to Jay, listening to the exchange from their corner table. ‘It’s not the Bates Motel. It’s above a pub, it looks out across the green, it’s a stone’s throw from the surgery, he gets breakfast chucked in, and Gina has just said she’ll do his washing.’

Jay laughed. ‘Absolutely. And she’s possibly the most beautiful landlady in the country. What’s not to like?’

Erin sipped her wine slowly. She’d had too much to drink really. This would have to be the last one tonight or she’d be feeling rubbish in the morning.

Jay ran his finger down her cheek. ‘Sorry if Kam was one Keskar too far tonight. Don’t worry about anything he said. Together,
we can ignore all of them and just carry on. Together, we can do anything. Right?’

‘Right.’ She smiled sleepily at him. He really was the loveliest man in the world. ‘Oh, I wish we were already married and all this stupid meddling was over.’

And Nalisha had gone to live in London for ever and ever.
But she didn’t say it.

‘Me too,’ Jay sighed. ‘Still, it won’t be long now, will it?’ Too long, Erin thought. Still too many days left for outside interference.

Oh, to hell with it all.

She relaxed back in her tapestry-cushioned carver chair, too tired to worry about anything else tonight. The Merry Cobbler was still very warm, despite all the leaded-light latticed windows being thrown open, and hummed with convivial conversations.

Tiny table lamps glowed, throwing splashes of gold across the shabby but comfortable room, and behind the bar, Gina and the elderly Sam were still very busy.

At the end of the sweltering evening, most people were drinking round the outside tables, but while Gina had shown Kam to his room, Erin and Jay had just collapsed into the nearest corner of the pub.

‘Last orders please!’ Gina moved away from Kam and energetically rang the old ship’s bell that hung from a twisted rope at the end of the bar. ‘Last orders, ladies and gents, please!’

There was a flurry of activity as the Nook Greeners all scraped chairs across the quarry-tiled floor, and eased themselves from behind tables, and shuffled forwards to buy their final drinks.

‘Hello, dears,’ Dora Wilberforce, dressed rather incongruously in a fringed denim skirt and a loudly
checked blouse, and smelling strongly of Yardley Lavender, paused beside them. ‘Lovely to see you both in here. What a blistering hot night though, isn’t it? My ginger beer just wouldn’t suffice tonight after the line dancing. Me and the rest of the Nook Green Yee-Hawers have all been rather naughty and popped in here for a nice cold lager and lime or two.’

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