I closed my eyes again, arching and twisting my hips at the joint sensations that fed my desire but weren’t enough to satisfy it. Only one act could quiet the thundering demand of my transforming body.
I opened my eyes again, reached down to touch Nathan’s hand between my legs. “Stop.”
He twisted the finger buried inside me, then slowly drew it out. And then, while I watched, slid it into his mouth to taste me on his tongue.
My sex clenched involuntarily, and Zach felt those inner muscles spasm as he eased a third finger into my anus, the sensation of fullness in that untried chamber a pleasurable prelude to more to come.
“Zach.” I said his name like a guttural invitation. “It isn’t enough.”
“I know.” His voice was low and rough, his amber eyes glowing so hot I thought I could see the wolf within the man. He withdrew his fingers, one at a time, leaving me empty and aching to be filled.
“It has to be you. The first time.” I tilted my head up, exposing the vulnerable curve of my throat to the pack’s alpha, acknowledging him for what he was, inviting his dominance, submitting to him. “Fuck me, Zach.”
I’M NOT SURE WHAT I EXPECTED. FOR HIM TO FALL ON ME AND HAMMER home without further preliminaries, maybe. But he made me wait, my body screaming to be taken, while he cleaned his hand and put aside the lubricant he’d picked up from somewhere to ease the entry of those additional fingers into my anus.
The guys had come in with supplies, it seemed. Thoughtful of them. I might be really grateful for lube by the end of the day.
Jack came around to my head holding a glass with a straw. “Drink this.”
Crap
. “More wolfsbane?”
“Protein shake.” He guided the straw between my lips and I sipped obediently even while every cell in my body protested the delay. If I had to spend the day mindless with lust, at least I was spending it with men who were looking out for me. Left to myself, I’d probably end up dehydrated and weak, because it wasn’t food I hungered for.
When Jack was satisfied that I’d swallowed enough, he took the glass away. And then the pack surrounded me, spreading kisses and caresses everywhere, while the beast inside me gloried in their homage. Zach came to push my thighs wider apart with his hands and kneel between them, and I noticed he’d gotten naked.
Had anybody else? I looked around and saw bare chests and feet, pants with top buttons undone, various signs of total group nudity in progress.
Good. If everybody was seeing mine, I should get to see theirs. And it would make skin-to-skin contact so much easier without any annoying fabric in the way. I liked them touching me. I wanted to touch them back. I wondered why I’d resisted this. They were mine, and I was theirs, and it was right that they should all witness and participate.
They stepped back as Zach lowered his body over mine and exultation pulsed through me. This was what I wanted. This was what I needed. I tilted my pelvis up and wrapped my legs around Zach’s waist, making myself as open and accessible to him as I could.
He let the broad head of his cock nudge against the slick, swollen folds of my sex but didn’t rush to enter me.
“Zach,” I groaned, writhing under him. “Please.”
He rocked his body into mine and pressed forward, just a little, just enough to make my softened flesh give as if he was testing my readiness. “Sure?”
I clawed at his back. “I have to. I need to. Please, I need you inside me.”
“They’re watching.” Zach murmured the words for my ears only. “Are you sure? Because once we start, there’s no stopping until it’s over.”
“They can take notes, take pictures, rate our performance on scorecards, I don’t care.” One thought struggled through my lust-soaked haze and I called over Zach’s shoulder, “If any of you put pictures or video on the Internet, I’ll have you killed.”
Jack laughed. “No recording devices of any kind present. Although it’d make one hell of a private viewing if you want to change that.”
“No.”
I turned my attention back to Zach. “I’m sorry about what I said last night. I could say no. I could send them away. I don’t want to. I want to have sex with you while they watch. They’re part of this. They belong.”
Zach groaned at my words and I felt the tension cording his muscles. “Don’t be sorry later.”
That was my only warning, and then he drove his cock into my waiting sheath, hard and fast and deep, and then it was done. I felt the knot swelling inside me as Zach filled the tight clasp of my body with the length and width of his shaft, stretching me. The unaccustomed sensation of full penetration was enough to make me gasp without the added singular feature of that knot.
“Zach.” I panted his name and clung to him, struggling to adjust. He gave me a minute to grow accustomed to the weight of his body on mine and the intimate invasion of my flesh.
“All right?” He asked the question against my lips, kissing me, gentling me before he began to move on me.
“Umm.” I kissed him back, falling into the moment, tasting the unique flavor that was Zach, delighting in the press of his body on mine and his possession of me. There was melting sweetness and tenderness in his kisses, and dizzying lust in the short, hard thrusts his cock made into my channel. “I like this.”
Weak, inadequate words. I loved this. I was insane for more. Only this could cool the fever that burned in my body; only this could give me release and relief.
“In the mall,” Zach gritted out as he abruptly rammed his cock so deep I felt the head press against the opening to my womb. He ground his groin against my folds as if he wanted to go even deeper than the limits of flesh allowed. “I wanted to put you up on the counter and get inside you. Right there, in the store.”
I made an inarticulate sound of pleasure and felt my sex react to the graphic picture he painted.
“You were right,” he went on in a harsh whisper. “I wanted to fuck you in front of an audience. I want them to hear you moaning for me, see you naked and spread wide for me. I want them to know it’s my cock cramming you so full you can’t move.”
He moved in a shifting pattern of short, shallow, then long and deep thrusts so I couldn’t anticipate his rhythm. I could only submit and accept each stroke, taking whatever he gave me.
“They’re watching now,” I murmured back. “Watching you nail me on this sofa.” And knowing that sent a thrill through me. I felt powerful and sexy. Hot. My sex gripped and squeezed Zach’s thick shaft in a precursor of orgasm.
“I’m going to nail you hard,” Zach said, suiting action to words. “Fuck you until I’m good and finished. Come in you until I’m empty and you’ve taken it all.”
Oh, God, yes
. I whimpered and worked my hips under him, writhing, twisting, bucking, straining. He drove into me over and over, finally settling into a steady, measured cadence he refused to speed up or deepen even when I sobbed and pleaded.
When I tried to fight him, desperate for relief, he held me down and rode me with relentless force. My world narrowed until it held only heat and need and Zach, feeding but not slaking my desire, making it build with each decisive thrust of his cock.
His name became a litany in my head, repeating with each stroke.
Zach. Zach
. I clung to him, wound myself around him, rocked with him, and he claimed more of me every time he drove home until I thought he might own me completely.
“Please, let me come. Please, I need to,” I begged. Tremors wracked my body.
“Tell me you want me,” he answered in a fierce snarl. “Tell me you want me to come inside you.”
“Oh, God, Zach, yes.” I clutched at him, shaking with the force of what I wanted. “I want you. I want you to come in me.”
He let out a low growl and let go of the iron control he’d exerted over both of us. He took me fast and ferociously deep. He used my sex with feral abandon and I loved it, loved his voracious cock, loved taking every hard inch he rammed into my soft flesh. He wasn’t gentle or restrained, and I didn’t want him to be. I wanted this.
“Zach. Yes.” I murmured my acceptance and permission, showing him with my body what I had no words for.
“I’m going to come.” Zach slammed into me, his cock going deep and fast, all the way to my cervix. “I’m going to empty my balls into you, pump you full of come.”
I made a soft sound of need and greed, my body rising up to meet his, my inner muscles spasming as my long-delayed orgasm began to take me. I felt his shaft swell, felt his cock jerk inside me as he started to come in hot, wet spurts. His fluids bathed my vaginal walls, sensitized from sex, and that intimate internal stimulation pushed me to the peak.
“Zach.” I didn’t know if I whispered his name or screamed it, but I was coming violently and endlessly, hips bucking, my inner muscles milking his cock. It went on and on, the two of us locked together, riding the tidal wave of release, until it finally subsided into eddying ripples.
I lay panting and spent under him. He sprawled on top of me, his shaft buried fully inside me. While we rested with our bodies still joined, I held him to me and wondered if I could contain the emotion of the experience. I couldn’t, and it leaked out of the corners of my eyes.
“Chandra.” Zach roused himself to nuzzle my cheek and brought his hands up to frame my face, brushing the tears away with his thumbs. “Sweetheart. Don’t cry. The knot will release.”
Yes, it would. But I wouldn’t be free.
“I’m okay,” I managed in a shaky whisper. I wasn’t, but he hadn’t meant to hurt me. I knew that. I’d known it before I said the words that would make the wound in my heart inevitable.
I’d asked him to fuck me. I’d begged him to take me. He’d given me every opportunity to change my mind. I hadn’t. More tears slid out, following the first.
“Tell me what you need.” Zach slid his arms under me, wrapping around me, cradling me close. “Anything you need, say the word and it’s yours.”
I needed to own a piece of his soul, the way he now owned a piece of mine. But he couldn’t give it to me for the asking. So I just shook my head and burrowed into his comforting strength. Inside me, I felt the knot dissolving. Our bodies could separate, but I wasn’t ready to let him go.
“Hold me,” I said, my voice raw. “Hold me, just a little longer.”
“As long as you want me to.” He stayed planted inside me, his arms tight around me, his body weighting mine down and anchoring me, solid and real and warm.
His lips searched out mine. Our mouths met and clung in a deep, sweet kiss that made my heart ache. When he raised his head, his eyes looked like clouded gold. “Don’t be sorry. Please don’t be sorry you gave yourself to me.”
I reached up to touch my fingers to his lips. “I’m not.”
Zach rested his forehead against mine. “Then what is it? Something’s wrong. Do you think I’m a monster now?”
I shook my head, genuinely puzzled. “What do you mean?”
“I fucked you like an animal. I knotted you. I did it in front of a group.”
I slid my hand to the side of his face and stroked it. “I’m not upset about the audience thing. I thought I would be. I’m not.”
He lifted his head, and something fierce showed in his expression. “You didn’t answer the other part.”
I shrugged. “If you’re a monster, I am, too.”
“You wanted something human.”
He would remember that. I wished I could go back in time and kick myself. “I wanted you.” That was true, and it could stand for all the rest I couldn’t say. I stroked his hair, kissed his shoulder, tightened my legs around him. “I still want you.”
Zach levered himself up. “Speaking of that, you’d better take advantage of this breather.”
I caught his meaning. The fever in my blood had lowered, but it still burned in me. The respite wouldn’t last. I’d need more and I’d probably need it soon.
“Right.” I reluctantly loosened my grip on him. He pulled out of my body and moved off to sit beside me. His hands reached for mine and he helped me sit up, too, drawing me close so I could lean into him for support.
Jack brought me another drink. I tugged a hand free, took the glass, and drained it without question, not even flinching at the taste of wolfsbane.
“Thank you.” I tried to smile at him as I passed the empty glass back, but I could feel that it didn’t quite reach my eyes.
“You’re welcome.” He leaned in to give me a kiss that zinged in a pleasant way. Zach’s hand tightened on mine, and I wondered if he was feeling territorial. If so, too bad for him. I had to deal with this. He could, too.
When the kiss ended, Zach scooped me into his lap and stood with me in his arms. “Let’s get cleaned up.”
“Right.” I rested my head on his shoulder and went along with his plan, although it seemed pointless. He’d marked me and nothing could ever wash that away.
He carried me into a bathroom off the library, sponged us both off, his hands so gentle on me that it made my throat ache. When he finished, he circled my waist and pulled me toward him until our bodies touched. I swayed closer until I rested against him, content to stand there in his loose embrace.
“This is nice,” I said softly, rubbing my cheek against his chest.
“Just the two of us.” Zach nuzzled my hair and then bent to kiss my temple. “I wanted you to myself for a minute.”
“I think we’re entitled to a minute.” I smiled against his skin as I spoke.
His arms tightened around me. “At the risk of ruining the moment, I need to ask you something.”
“Anything,” I said in a light, agreeable tone. And depending on what he asked, I might even tell the truth.
“David.”
“That’s a question?” I cuddled closer and realized I was feeling more aware of the pressure that created against the swell of my breasts, the sensual ache there, the swollen buds of my nipples. Another wave of heat building.
“You didn’t ask me what you asked him.”
“Still not a question.”
“I didn’t think I had to spell it out.”
No. He didn’t. I sighed and let my hands wander over him for the sheer tactile pleasure of it. “I didn’t have to ask you. You won’t hate me for having sex with him. I wasn’t sure the reverse was true.”
Zach’s fingers dug into me, hard. Possessive. “What if he’d said yes?”
I lifted my head to meet his eyes with mine. “I still would have fucked you first. I just would’ve tried not to fuck him afterward.”