Autumn Leaves (17 page)

“Hey. We meet again. That has got to mean something.”

The voice sounded vaguely familiar. Callie’s good mood was slightly dampened when she recognized Rich Boy Driving Daddy’s Porsche.

“It means there aren’t many grocery stores in this town,” she said, making no attempt to hide her sudden irritation. There was no need to encourage him.

“Can I drive you home today?”

“No thanks. I came here in my own car.”

“Callie Bryan.” He grinned.

“That’s my name. Wow. I’m impressed.”

“I hear you don’t like guys, Callie. That can be changed, you know.”

Not again
. “Let me tell you something. Matt it is, right? What I like or don’t like is none of your business. Are we clear on that?”

He was still blocking her way, the same conceited smile on his face. When she tried to pass him by, he grabbed her wrist.

“Maybe you just need to be convinced otherwise, huh?”

“Maybe you need to take a cold shower,” Callie snapped, tearing herself away. Hastily, she turned and headed towards the register, her heart hammering. Damn him for spoiling the fragile state of happiness she’d achieved. Callie just hoped that Betty LaRue would stay away from brunch today. She’d go because Rebecca had asked her to, but she really didn’t need any more of this homophobic crap today. Behind the shelf, Matt Weller was talking to one of his buddies, their laughter making her skin crawl. Nicole had always said she was too sensitive. Damn her too. After she paid, Callie all but fled from the store.

* * * *

“Hey sweetie. Long time, no see.”

Maria was the first to arrive, greeting Rebecca with a hug. “I hear you’ve been left behind in favor of our church getting a modern touch, new website and all. How are you doing?”

“Just great, thank you.” It wasn’t exactly a lie. Since Callie had actually made her get back to her work, she hadn’t felt so much left behind anymore. When she’d set the table in the dining room after taking that shower, she felt like she was in someone else’s house. She couldn’t wait for Callie to return and make the world real again.

“I was just so busy—I’ve got to admit I completely forgot about brunch. Callie will be here any minute. She went shopping for me so we won’t have to go hungry.” She was rambling, and Rebecca realized Maria was very much aware of it.

“Betty won’t come,” she said with a hint of regret, looking at the table all set, complete with fresh flowers and white dishes on a bright yellow tablecloth.

“Oh. Okay. I’m afraid I kind of expected that. She’s got all kinds of trouble going on at the moment.”

“Yeah.” Maria sighed. “Chip came home from school with a broken arm yesterday. This is escalating, and there’s nothing the police can do about it.”

“That’s bad,” Rebecca agreed. “Have you talked to Roz?”

“Sorry.” Maria shook her head sadly. “You know that Roz’s mother is good friends with Betty.”

“I get it.” What Callie brought would probably be way too much now. “Whatever. So it’s the three of us. You can take some food home, and we’ll...I mean I’ll give some to Callie and keep the rest.”

“You two are getting along well,” Maria remarked. “I think it’s fortunate that she chose Autumn Leaves to finish her novel. You were overdue for a little excitement.”

Rebecca stared at her friend incredulously. “Excuse me?”

Maria smiled. “Don’t worry. I won’t tell anybody.”

Her hand was steady as she poured Maria a fresh cup of coffee, but still the coffee had nearly landed beside the cup. “Tell anybody what?” She sat at the table, across from Maria, thinking of ways to deny and conceal. The idea that anybody could know was just out of the question. Not possible.

“Rebecca,” Maria said way too patiently. “You wouldn’t be the first woman to have fantasies that your husband can’t satisfy.”

Taking a sip of coffee at that moment was a bad mistake, sending Rebecca right into a coughing fit. “I’m not sure I want to have this conversation,” she said when she could properly breathe again. “I take it you’re talking about yourself.”

“Oh, come on. I know you.” Maria wasn’t mean. She just was trying to make a point. Rebecca hoped she would be done with it by the time Callie returned. “You were totally jealous that I brought her to choir, and brunch.”

“I wasn’t, but...” She couldn’t wrap her mind around the idea. “I always thought you were happy.”

I’d thought the same thing of myself.

Maria shrugged. “I’m not desperate if that’s what you mean. Agreements only work if two people are really on the same page. You know, Craig isn’t the bravest man. I’m not the most faithful woman. We’ve learned to forgive each other’s shortcomings. There is compromise in love, after all.”

No, there isn’t.
It was on the top of Rebecca’s tongue to protest, but all she could do was sit and stare at Maria. “You cheated on him...with a woman?” Those words sounded awfully judgmental. Rebecca wished she could have taken them back. Reality was catching up with her, about to hit her with the force of a sledgehammer. Also, what exactly did Maria mean about David’s brother not being brave?

“If it’s out there in the open, I don’t think you can call it cheating. Craig doesn’t mind. It’s not like it has happened that often. I know you would never go there, but a little imagination can’t hurt. Might even spice up things in the bedroom.”

“Oh God. This can’t be true. With Callie...It’s just not like that.” She’d wanted to run and hide before, but maybe this dance on the edge of the knife, on the verge of the truth coming out was what she needed. A step she couldn’t take back, Rebecca realized when she saw the understanding dawning on Maria’s face.

“Oh no, sweetie. You do have feelings for her.”

Rebecca saw no point in denying.

“Be careful,” Maria advised. “For your sake and hers. A little fantasy is fine, but if you go beyond that, neither of you will be able to let go. You’re emotionally attached, things become infinitely complicated.”

Rebecca was about to blurt out that it was much too late for that now when the doorbell rang, so she just sent her friend a pleading gaze not to continue the subject.

Her mind was still reeling when they sat down to eat, so Rebecca was quite content to listen to Maria and Callie talk about choir, everyone avoiding the subject of Betty. There was something wrong with that, she thought, just like Betty pretending that her son wasn’t going through a horrible time. All parents wanted their children to be special. However, when they were in high school, everyone just wanted them to be within the boundaries of normalcy defined by somebody else. Wasn’t that some kind of failure? Dina and Maggie were getting along with everyone, bringing home the occasional bad mood and grade. Rebecca wasn’t sure what she would have done if it had been any different, but she was quite certain she would have done something.

It felt strange to contemplate this subject now sitting at the table with her long-time friend, and her lover. Her face felt warm at the thought. Was it a delusion that she just wanted to stay with that feeling that made her face relax in a smile and the butterflies in her stomach go all crazy? Maybe. The guilt was tucked away neatly in a corner of her mind, and she’d let it out once it was the time. Rebecca finally dared to watch Callie, who was sharing ideas with Maria for future performances of the choir.

“You have a beautiful voice,” Maria said. “You could do a solo sometime.”

“No way.” Callie shook her head vehemently.

“You’ve been on book tours and done interviews. This can’t be any harder.”

“It is, believe me.”

Callie tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, the sleeve of her blouse riding up, revealing the smudge of slightly reddened skin around her wrist. The sight jolted Rebecca out of her musings instantly.

“What happened to you?” she asked, frowning.

“What?”

“There.” If her touch was too cautious and tender not to reveal anything to Maria, Rebecca didn’t care.

Callie hastily put her sleeve back down. “Oh, that. I nearly slipped. Some friendly person next to me in the aisle grabbed my arm, and worse things could be avoided.”

Rebecca gave her an intent look, her suspicions confirmed when Callie smiled self-consciously and looked away. Creating diversions was part of Callie’s job, so, naturally, she was good at it. It came to Rebecca’s mind that probably not many people knew the truth about Nicole. She wasn’t going to push now, but she wasn’t going to let it go either.

“Yeah,” Maria said. “People in Autumn Leaves pay a lot of attention to what their neighbors do. Sometimes it’s not such a bad thing.” They laughed, the tension diverted for the moment.

Maria eventually got up with a sigh. “I’m sorry, but I really have to go now. Rebecca, I happily accept the care package. It means I won’t have to cook tonight if my husband happens to find his way home. Say hello to David and the kids, and be sure your house is all prepared for the storm.”

When she was gone, Callie said, “I like her a lot. Doesn’t mean I understand all of her metaphors.”

Rebecca, however, understood. That house might come tumbling down at the first gust of wind, but there was some time left until that.

* * * *

Dissociation worked better when they were back in Callie’s home. No thoughts or worries, nothing on her mind but Callie in her arms, warm and more than willing as they shared lazy kisses on the couch, their laptops on standby. Her hands were too eager, wanting to be everywhere at once, down Callie’s back to pull her closer, the perfect curves of her breasts, underneath her shirt to touch soft skin.

“You feel so good.” The words just came tumbling out, and Rebecca barely stopped herself before saying anything that couldn’t be taken back. Like that nothing had ever felt like this. Like those words that would change everything.

As if it hadn’t already. Yesterday, she was self-conscious in the darkened room. Now, the fact that they were about to get naked in broad daylight didn’t bother her at all. She wanted to. Her hand wandered between Callie’s legs, fingers exerting soft pressure.

“I appreciate that, but…” Callie’s word trailed off into a wordless moan. “You’ve got a deadline, and you’re going to hate me if you don’t make it.”

“You think about my deadlines now?” Part of Rebecca’s frustration came from the fact that Callie was, of course, right. Callie brushed her fingers lightly over Rebecca’s hand, the caress causing a pleasant shiver. If only they could just forget about responsible adult life.

“I want you to be happy,” Callie said as if that was an explanation. Rebecca couldn’t possibly let her down now, and so she straightened up with a sigh.

“Okay. Work now. Fun later,” she said. “I believe you have a novel to write.” Still, she found it hard to make herself move.

“Come on.” Callie was on her feet already. “I’ll get us some more coffee. A few hours of work...Then I’ll go down on you.”

Rebecca jumped a little, wondering if she’d heard those words correctly.

“Or…” Callie leaned over the table with a knowing smirk. “Maybe you’ll want to go down on me?”

“God,” Rebecca moaned. “I’ll never get the bloody website done!”

She did though, bit by bit, finding that she had in fact a great working environment. Callie asked a few questions, and Rebecca showed her how the code formed colors and textures. Father Langdon wanted to give the church and its offers for teens a modern touch, letting them know there was a place where they were welcome with their needs. It was a good cause, and satisfying to see that the place she and David had chosen for their children to grow up was open and encouraging. There was a place to go for troubled kids like Charles after all, and the internet was a good way to help them find this place. Thinking of Chip reminded her of something else.

“Are you going to tell me what really happened at the store?”

Callie looked up at her, slightly alarmed. “Don’t do that without warning.”

“Did somebody bother you? I want to know. There’s something we can do about it.” She didn’t have a brother-in-law with the police for nothing.

“Oh, no. It’s that kid with the Porsche.”

“Matt Weller? What did he do?”

Callie shrugged. “Spouting some sexist homophobic crap. Yeah, it sucks, but I’d rather just forget about it.”

“That bruise didn’t come just from words.”

“Can’t we leave it alone for now?” Callie’s pleading look was hard to resist. Rebecca made a mental note to tell Craig to watch out for Weller. She’d met the father at one time, a rather unpleasant experience. Like father, like son. It couldn’t be that their money gave them the right to terrorize people in town.

“I didn’t call the police on Betty when she slapped me.”

“She did what?” At some point, Rebecca thought she didn’t recognize herself anymore, her thoughts, her desires, but maybe everyone else around her had gotten crazy.

“Let it go, Rebecca. We have little time as it is. I’d rather not spend it worrying about people who can’t get their heads out of their asses. Two more hours. I’ll cook today.” She got up to walk around the table, and let herself be pulled into Rebecca’s lap. Callie leaned close to kiss her very softly.