Awakened by His Touch (13 page)

Did such a thing even exist? Her voice was mostly a chuckle. ‘Shame...’

Hot lips pressed down onto hers, sliding against the gloss and roaming over her mouth. She arched up out of the sofa to meet them more fully. Hazy heat swelled up and dazzled her senses as Elliott kissed her, mouthing her the way she’d wanted so desperately on the sandbar—tasting and exploring and teasing—torturing her tongue with his. His arms slid around behind her and kept her hard up against him.

It was like the parasailing again, but her position was reversed. She sighed into his mouth.

But then he relaxed her into the sofa-back and lifted his head. ‘There—that’s sorted it.’

For a moment she was too disorientated to speak, but she forced her wits back into line as she straightened in her seat. Back upright like a regular person. ‘Are you now wearing it?’

His laugh was mostly snort. ‘My sleeve is’

‘You’re worse than Owen.’ Her wine returned magically into her hand. ‘So that’s the kissing over with, then?’

Boo.

‘It really wasn’t my plan to maul you the moment you walked in the door...’ He sounded genuinely confused.

‘But you couldn’t resist?’

‘Opportunity presented itself.’ He leaned into the sofa more fully but his voice didn’t leave her for a moment. He stayed close. ‘And what kind of a host would I be to leave you without assistance? But I haven’t forgotten what you said, so I give you my word the next kiss is entirely up to you.’

If it was up to her then she’d like to resume kissing right now, actually. But social niceties made that impossible.

Her breath shuddered in quietly. ‘So I just wanted to say thank you, again, for today. Parasailing was amazing.’

‘I agree. It’s going to be hard to go back to solo lifts.’

‘You’re so lucky you get to do that whenever you want.’

‘Whenever work lets me.’

‘You work weekends?’

‘I’m working
this
weekend.’

Work
. That was like a bucket of cold lip-gloss. ‘Oh.’

‘Tomorrow, I mean. Not today—definitely not now. But, yes, that’s the sad truth about the lifestyle. You spend so much time funding it you can’t always be free to enjoy it.’

‘Guess that’s the difference between your job and mine. I live my love every day.’

‘If I wanted to do that I’d have to become a parasailing instructor.’

‘Would that be so bad? You’re very good at it.’

He gave that his usual thought. ‘I’m pretty sure Ashmore Coolidge wouldn’t let me go without a fight. And I’d have to move out of my penthouse. And I don’t know how long I could go before I would feel like I was under-achieving. You know?’

Back to the
realising
. ‘Isn’t doing what you love fulfilling your potential?’

‘Not if it’s not making you decent money.’

‘What about being happy?’

‘I’ll be happy when I’m retired.’

‘No, you won’t. You’ll be appalled at how much time you have and how much money you might otherwise be making with that time.’

His chuckle warmed her even more than his closeness. ‘Yeah, probably.’

Conversation dropped off and Laney fought her natural inclination to flinch when soft fingers lifted a lock of her hair and draped it back, away from her face.

‘I can see the make-up now,’ he murmured.

Yeah, she’d bet he could. He was leaning close enough. ‘Did I do it right?’

‘I can barely tell it’s there. Which is probably the point.’ The sofa-back shifted as he did. ‘You always look good. Natural.’

‘Thank you.’

‘So tell me about this kiss you’re imagining. Do you have make-up on in it?’

‘When I imagine it, it’s all about sensation. Not really how good we look while doing it.’

His smile warmed the conversation. ‘Describe the sensations.’

Discomfort washed through her. ‘Um...’

He helped. ‘Is it fast or slow?’

Yeah, this would be easier. ‘Slow.’

‘Why?’

‘So it will last.’

His small grunt said
good reason
.

‘What else?’

‘You’re standing. So I have to stretch up to you.’ And press her body against his—but she wasn’t going to share that part.

‘Sounds like a lot of work on your part.’

‘I don’t mind. It’s worth it.’

He liberated the wine glass from her and it clanked on the coffee table. Then strong arms pulled her to her feet and he stepped in close. She had to tilt her head to avoid her nose pressing into his chest.

‘A good kiss, then?’ he murmured.

‘Yep. Just right.’

Gentle hands lifted hers up and linked them behind his neck. Her body pressed against his, just as it had in her mind. Warm and soft met hot and hard. His hands slid around onto her hips.

‘And what’s
just right
to you, Goldilocks?’ Ragged breath totally betrayed his interest, no matter how casual the hold of his arms.

Speech was almost impossible past the tight press of her chest. ‘Lazy. Explorative.’

‘Who controls it?’ This breathed right against her lips.

‘Me, at first.’ She took a long, slow breath. ‘But then you.’

He immediately suspended his descent. Froze there. Waiting. ‘Then it’s your move, Laney.’

Yeah.

Only real kisses weren’t quite as easy as fantasy ones. Every breath pulled in her chest, like Wilbur against his harness when he wanted to be released. But Elliott’s patient silence and oh-so-warm body encouraged her, and she feathered her fingertips up his jaw to rest on his cheek, then pushed up onto her toes to make contact. It didn’t matter that they’d already kissed—that had been
him
kissing her.

This was
her
...

Initiating a kiss for the first time.

Her lips fluttered as they met his—half missing his mouth, but all the more exciting for landing so squarely on his full bottom lip by mistake. She loved that bottom lip, though her experience of it was somewhat limited. She hoped to get to know it a whole lot more. A hint of stubble below it scraped her own hyper-sensitive flesh and Elliott’s arms tightened around her, slid up to entwine them and trap her within his embrace.

The security of his hold gave her courage a boost, and she pressed her kiss more firmly against his receptive mouth, lapping gently at his closed lips until they gave her the access she wanted.

Elliott bound her closer—into a space she hadn’t even realised could exist—and tangled her tongue with his, challenging her to yield. Fighting for control was fun, but ceding to his experience was a pleasure, and she whimpered as he took over the exploration, roaming and tasting and tormenting with his talented mouth.

It was just as she’d imagined. Yet so much more.

‘And then what happens?’ he ground out as he rose for breath.

She tipped her spinning head.

‘In your perfect kiss, Laney? What comes next?’

‘I don’t know. I haven’t let myself think beyond that.’

She felt his immediate tension everywhere. It pressed against her. The subtle tightening of his muscles even as they loosened—just as subtly—their hold on her.

‘You haven’t let yourself or you don’t know what comes next?’ His hold loosened even further at her silence. ‘Have you ever slept with anyone, Laney?’

Her mind spiralled in a slow circle, making thinking difficult. ‘Wilbur.’

‘Not counting your dog.’ He chuckled.

Then, no.
‘Why? Does that make a difference?’

He released her that little bit further. ‘Yeah, it does. Of course it does.’

‘I’m twenty-five, Elliott. It has to happen eventually.’

She really wanted it to happen eventually. Actually, she kind of wanted it to happen now. While her body was still on board with that plan.

Those lips that had just tortured hers so perfectly shaped new words. Final words.

‘But not tonight.’

* * *

She placed one foot behind her to steady herself as her stretch shrank backwards. Away from Elliott.

Here it comes...

Confusion stained her pretty face. ‘You’re not attracted to me?’

‘Laney...’

‘That’s a genuine question, Elliott.’

Yeah. She wasn’t the fishing for compliments type. ‘It’s not about attraction, Laney. It’s about appropriateness.’

Half the extra colour birthed by their kisses drained from her face. ‘What?’

His stomach fisted hard, deep in his body. ‘Sleeping with you would be...’

‘Inappropriate?’

Just do it, man.
It was always going to end like this. Of course it was.

‘Unethical.’

That word—that sentiment—had her taking a second step back. The coffee table hit her calves. But she stabilised and straightened. ‘Isn’t that something you should have thought about before all the kissing started?’

‘Look, Laney. There’s a big difference between kissing someone and taking their virginity.’

One meant something. The other meant
everything
. And he didn’t do
everything
.

Her arms crept around her torso. ‘So if I wasn’t a virgin we’d be having sex right now?’

Would they? Would his galloping confusion be any less if he was not her first? Or would his conscience still have raised its unwelcome head.

He sighed and turned partly away. ‘No. There’s still a difference.’

And his brain had been trying to get his attention as he’d paced up and down in the little chalet, waiting for her to arrive, but his body had kept overruling it. Because he wanted to be able to want her. So badly.

‘Who’s going to know?’

‘I’ll know, Laney. That’s not the kind of man I am.’

‘Really? The kind of man that would lead a woman on and then drop her cold?’

He couldn’t say he didn’t deserve that. Except he discovered he couldn’t say anything at all.

‘Why not have someone else assigned to Morgan’s?’ she suggested finally. ‘Nothing inappropriate then.’

And he’d have jumped on that if it were the only thing stopping him. If it weren’t for the raging tightness deep in his chest. But she was handing him the perfect out and he was coward enough to take it.

‘Because you’re my case.’

‘Sure—normally. But under the circumstances...’

‘No one else wants you, Laney. I’m the one pushing Morgan’s at executive level.’

Speaking of pushing...something was driving him hard. Pushing Laney back. Pushing her away as determinedly as he’d dragged her towards him only minutes before.

‘But if they agree we have potential? Wouldn’t someone else run with that?’

Everything he’d worked for over so many years suddenly felt unstable—unreliable and totally out of his control—and that big, gaping void inside him seemed to loom large and hollow.

‘I don’t want someone else running with it. Morgan’s is my client.
My
opportunity.’

She sagged down onto the coffee table and the rest of her colour abandoned her. ‘Opportunity for what?’

Surely she’d understand... This was Laney. She was amazing. If anyone could understand him, what drove him—

‘I’ve been gunning for partner for two years, Laney. And Morgan’s is going to get me there. I’m not about to pass that opportunity off to someone else, even for—’

He caught himself, but the sentiment hung out there, all miserable and unmissable.
Even for a blind woman.

Her fingers curled on the table-edge just as they had on his boat.

‘For me?’

Hurting her hurt him. It was like an open wound in his body. But something stopped him from going to her. Some ancient fear. Some inherent...
lack
. When all he wanted to do was trust someone with the truth.

Trust Laney with the big void inside him.

‘I see. So the kissing? The parasailing?’

‘I wanted to get to know you, Laney. I still do. I really wasn’t thinking about what would happen next.’

‘You’ve filled the place with
candles
. And you had a couple of hours to think about it...’

He opened his mouth to defend the undefendable. So he just closed it again.

Her spine forced her upright, rigid and erect. ‘Your career means more to you than an opportunity to take things further with me?’

No. That wasn’t it at all. But lying was easier than trying to untangle the truth when the truth was so deeply woven into his flesh. ‘My career
is
important to me,’ he hedged.

She pressed her palms to her cheeks, as if that could mask the dread now there.

‘Laney, don’t look like that.’

‘There is no way this could have worked,’ she whispered. ‘We’re such different people...’

‘No, we’re not. But the timing is all off.’

Her head came up. ‘How is time going to change anything?’

‘Circumstances could change.’

Misery thickened her voice and deadened her eyes. ‘I told you Morgan’s isn’t interested.’

‘You haven’t heard my proposal yet.’

‘I don’t really need to, Elliott. We’re just not interested.’

‘Wait until you see the numbers.’

‘Like that’s all that matters.’ But then her face lifted. ‘If Morgan’s was not an Ashmore Coolidge client any more...could we keep seeing each other?’

‘You’d
fire
us?’

‘I can get anyone to do our financial management.’

The implication being she couldn’t find just anyone to make her feel the way he did. His heart hammered dangerously faster.

‘Just so we could be together?’

* * *

And there it was.

The great imbalance in their respective feelings and attitudes made manifest in that one little word.

Just
.

Laney would have done almost anything to give them a chance to explore this thing between them more. Elliott would do virtually nothing.

She shot back to her feet. Angry enough to stir. ‘So, a one-night stand, then?’

Not that she had any intention of doing anything of the sort.

Anger hissed out of him. ‘I told you. It’s—’

‘Unethical. I know. But that’s a relationship. I’m talking about a one-off thing. No strings attached.’ She waved her hands wildly around her. ‘What happens in the chalet stays in the chalet.’