Authors: Sharlay
* * *
After watching the world, as Taylor calls it, he decides to drive me home. I would be lying if I say that I am not a little disappointed, but I know that letting me this close is a big step for him. I know that he tries to push me away, but I need to find a way to break through his exterior, to let him know that it’s ok to let me in.
Once he drops me off, he insists on walking me to my apartment door. The elevator is out of order, as always, and we have to take the stairs. It’s only two floors up, which isn’t too bad. We walk down the corridor in silence, my tiny hand wrapped up in his. When we reach my door, we stop. I slowly let go of his hand and take my keys out of my purse.
“I had a really nice night,” I say as we stand outside of my apartment door. I fiddle with the keys in my hand as he just watches me.
“Yeah, I enjoyed it, too.”
“Your place is beautiful. I guess everyone says that when they see it, though.”
“I don’t bring people to my home, Paige.”
He grabs my attention and I look up at him.
“And I definitely don’t bring women there. You’re the first. It’s my...private place. I just felt like I could share a piece of that with you tonight.”
“I’m glad you did.”
“Yeah, me too.”
I keep my eyes on his and the moment suddenly feels intense. My heart is racing and my palms are clammy.
Kiss me.
My brain is screaming the words at him, willing him to move forward. I shouldn’t feel like this, I’ve only known him for a few days, but my body doesn’t care. By heart is already in love with him. My heart is replaying every dream and telling me that the real moments are even better. It wants him. It already knows him. It just wants to feel him for
real.
The phrase
kiss me
is on repeat in my brain and I almost feel like he hears it. It doesn’t want the chaste ‘almost’ kiss that it received earlier. It wants more.
“Goodnight, Paige.” All of my hopes are crushed in a single sentence. I take a deep breath and try to pull my thoughts together.
“Goodnight,” it comes out quiet and weak.
“I’ll speak to you tomorrow,” he says, before turning away.
“Yeah.” I fumble with the keys to my apartment before letting myself in. I close the door and lean against it in disappointment. I feel so stupid. Did I do something wrong? Did I misread the signs? I was so sure that he wanted to kiss me but maybe it was just me that wanted to kiss him. Maybe tonight was too much. I was moving too fast. Damn it! I’ve ruined things. I close my eyes in embarrassment, and groan. A loud bang against the door almost gives me a heart attack. I jump and spin around on instinct. I open the door.
“I’m sorry.” It’s all that he says before he pulls my face toward his and kisses me. I’m in shock. I don’t kiss him back at first because I’m still trying to work out what the hell is happening. Then his tongue slips inside my mouth and my body is on fire. I try to remember what kissing him in my dreams feels like but they pale in comparison and so I replace the memories of them with this one. My hands remain by my side and I leave him in control. My mind is racing with a thousand questions but they are irrelevant. All that matters is what his lips feel like against mine, and they are perfect. The kiss is so intense, so intimate that I feel like a teenager again. It’s like a first kiss. He kisses me like I’m one of his paintings. He paints my mouth with his skilled tongue and sets my body on fire. There is no word that exists that can truly explain what I am feeling right now. His demanding hands hold my face in place as he controls every aspect of the kiss. I submit easily. Finally my hands wrap themselves around the nape of his neck and I pull him closer. We stumble slightly into my apartment, but we hardly notice. Our breathing sounds out of control and we are kissing each other like our lives depend on it.
“Tell me to go, Paige,” he breathes between kisses.
“No.” I say firmly.
My back smashes against the wall and before I know it, my hands are pinned above my head. He stops for a moment to stare at me. I see the hunger in his eyes and I clench my thighs together, trying to calm the need. His lips touch mine slowly. His tongue trails along my bottom lip, painting his existence there. I groan, and his mouth is on mine fully again. I cannot compare his kiss to any other kiss I have experienced because I have never been kissed like this before. I’m panting and fighting to touch him. But he keeps my hands in place. I can feel his resistance. He won’t allow me to take it any further. He is in control and the strangest part is...I like it.
He ends the kiss, and his lips just rest against mine. I feel his warm breath fan against my lips. He steps back and just watches me. His eyes scan mine, then my lips, and back up again. I try to find the little amounts of breath that have escaped me but I can’t. I feel naked under his gaze. I see his internal battle and the very moment that he makes a decision.
“Goodnight, Paige.” I say nothing. I just watch as he walks out of my apartment. I stand still and just stare, wondering what just happened and knowing that I cannot live without feeling what I just felt tonight again. That kiss just became one of my reasons to breathe....
CHAPTER TWENTY
PAIGE’S STORY
A
fter Taylor kissed me the other night, everything changed. He changed. He seemed to be more relaxed. It was like he had given me a part of him, committed himself, and I loved it. The past week we have kind of fallen into a strange routine. We have seen each other every day. I feel like we’ve been together for much longer than a week. Not that we’ve actually discussed being
together
but it feels like it. We talk on the phone when we aren't together. He either sends me some silly texts throughout the day, or I call him on my lunch break. Then every night he comes round to my apartment or takes me on a long drive. He never stays the night though. I wish that I could put that down to my excellent resistance skills but that would be a lie. He says that he can’t take things further with me...not yet. That’s his frustrating explanation. My body is literally yearning for him. Probably because he is holding back. I just want him more. Everything so far has been better than my dreams. And my mind can’t stop fantasizing about the thought of being with him in reality.
Putting all of that aside, he has agreed to meet my family tonight. It isn’t a big introduction or anything, it actually happened by accident. He wanted to take me out tonight to some fancy glass boat restaurant. It sounded great but I had already planned to spend the evening at my dad’s with Nate and Liv. After hearing the disappointment in his voice, I just blurted out about him coming along. I didn’t really expect him to say yes, and when he did, I had no way out of it. I guess I do want my family to get to know him but everything is still so fresh with Rick. They’ve known Rick for three years, and suddenly, we’re over and I’m pushing a new guy on them. It feels weird. In a strange way, I know that Taylor is the one for me. I don’t know how I know, but I do. Now I’ve just got to hope that my family understands it.
“So, are you sure that your family won’t mind that I’m coming?” Taylor asks nervously, as he slips his fingers between mine.
“I think they’ll be fine. It’s just strange, I guess, you know, after Rick. We were together for three years and now I’m just pushing a new guy at them. It’s a lot to take in, but that’s between me and them, not you. They’ll be fine with you.”
“Do you still love him?” He asks.
“Yes.” I hear him swallow. “But not in the way that you think. Rick and I have been falling apart for a long time. We spent a lot of time together and I love him for the time that we shared, but I don’t want to be back with him.”
“I understand.” He seems to be thinking.
“It sounds strange, but my connection with dream Taylor just always felt stronger than with Rick. And my connection with you feels stronger than dream Taylor’s,” I chuckle. If someone was listening I would sound so crazy right now but he just smiles as if he gets it. He stops and pulls me toward him slowly.
“I like that,” he whispers less than an inch from my lips.
“Good,” I breathe.
I knew that he was going to kiss me but it still takes my breath away. It always does. We’ve done a lot of kissing since that night at his house. He is definitely a better kisser than dream Taylor...much better. His hand is gently caressing the back of my neck and I feel lost in him. My eyes don’t open even when he gently pulls away.
“We should probably go inside now,” he smiles against my lips.
“Yeah...probably,” I say as my eyes slowly flutter open. “You know that I’m going to be thinking about that kiss for the entire time that we are here, right?” I say as we walk hand in hand up my father’s lawn.
“Good, that’s the impression I always intend to leave on you. I like to know that you can feel and taste me even when I’m not around,” he winks, before my dad swings open the front door. Please tell me he wasn’t watching.
“I knew I heard footsteps,” he smiles as he greets us warmly.
I’m still trying to get over Taylor’s comment when I make the introductions. It doesn’t help that he has a slight smirk on his face either.
“Hey, Dad,” I say, wrapping myself up in his bear hug.
“Hello, Princess,” he smiles.
“Dad, I want you to meet Taylor. Taylor, this is my dad,” I say taking a step back.
“It’s a pleasure to meet you,” Taylor extends his hand politely.
“Likewise, son,” my dad replies genuinely. “Come on in before you two make yourselves ill; it’s cold out.”
“Thank you,” Taylor says, before we walk through the door.
“How was the drive up?” He asks.
“Not bad, I slept most of the way. Taylor drove.”
“Typical,” my dad says, rolling his eyes.
“Where is everyone?” I ask.
“Liv’s helping me out in the kitchen and your brother is watching TV next door,” he says pointing toward the living room. “Food will be ready in about ten minutes, go and see if you can tear Nate away from the TV.” I nod in amusement.
Nate is lying across the couch with his arms folded across his chest staring at the screen.
“What’s up?” He mumbles when we enter, barely looking up at us.
“Hello,
Nate,
this is Taylor,” I say, rolling my eyes at my brother’s lack of manners. He does it on purpose. He’s always testing people and keeping them at a distance. Beneath the rude and carefree attitude is actually a good guy, you just have to have the patience to peel away at the layers.
Nate tears his eyes from the TV screen to glance at Taylor. “Hi.” He snorts before turning back toward the TV again.
“Hi,” Taylor returns politely.
I give him an apologetic look. He smiles at me, which tells me that he doesn’t mind, but I do.
“So, what time did you get here?”
“Around an hour ago, I was at Tyson’s.”
“How is he?”
“Not bad, he was asking for you actually. He didn’t know if you were still alive after your drunken episode.”
“That was ages ago, shut up,” I growl.
I see Taylor smiling out the corner of my eye but I ignore him.
“So, what are you watching?” I ask, changing the subject.
“Cricket.”
“Who’s playing?” Taylor asks, surprising us both.
“You watch cricket?” We both ask in unison.
“Yeah,” he chuckles at our expression before turning his attention back to the screen. “Is that Steve Gellerino? I thought that he was disqualified?”
“No, just a warning but he’s on his last. You like him?” Nate asks, giving Taylor his full attention.
“Of course. The guy’s a legend. Did you see his last game?”
“Did I see it? Of course, I did.” Nate suddenly sits up, making room for Taylor on the couch, next to him.
“I was there.”
“What? As in
there
?” He asks, pointing at the screen.
“Yeah, a guy I know hooked me up with some tickets.”
“I seriously hate you right now,” Nate says in disbelief.
“He always gets them. His cousin owns one of the fields. I’ll let you know if I ever have a spare one.”
“Paige, this guy is a definite upgrade from pretty boy. We’re keeping him,” Nate beams causing Taylor to laugh.
Taylor turns to me and mouths “pretty boy?”
I shake my head. “Ignore him. I’m going to check on Dad and Liv. Can I trust you alone with him?” I ask Nate.
“Yeah, yeah, go,” he says waving his hand dismissively in my direction. I chuckle to myself before heading into the kitchen.
“Something smells good,” I say as I walk in.
“Hey, where’s Taylor?” Liv asks.
“Watching TV with Nate.”
“You left him alone with the sociopath?” She asks in shock. I burst out laughing.
“They’re fine, they’re watching cricket.”
“Cricket’s on? I thought Nate was just watching some trash,” Dad suddenly interjects. “Who’s playing?”
“Someone called Steve Jelly something according to Taylor.”