Bent (23 page)

Julia wanted to plant herself on a stool at The Oasis and drink herself into oblivion. If she was sitting back in New York and had this bomb dropped on her, she and Jose Cuervo would have had a long talk. Unfortunately, going home was going to mean walking into a house with a minor who had already dealt with warring parents and substance abuse. When she finally decided to get back in her car, she would do it completely sober and with a clearer head.

If it had been the middle of summer, she would have filled the gas tank and driven aimlessly through the hills and curves of southern Wisconsin. In late November, the day after the first snowfall, that was only a slightly less dangerous option than getting drunk. So, Julia did what she figured any woman would do in her situation. She went shopping.

Most days, Julia would have gone out of her way to avoid the mall crowds. She had little patience for spoiled teens spending copious amounts of their parents' money. Little children running from their parents reminded her of the dreams she once held for the perfect life with a man she loved.

She had planned on marrying the man of her dreams and having a child of her own by thirty. That was an especially painful thought right now as she was faced with a man she loved who had a surly pre-teen son and more baggage than the cargo hold of a 747.

Luckily, there were some great sales that made up for the emotional torture.

By four o'clock, the incessant ringing of her phone made it seem like
Hard to Love
was on a continuous loop in her purse. A pattern of four calls and one voicemail quickly emerged. Eventually, Julia tired of listening to the song playing and answered her phone, "Yeah?" she snipped.

"Where in the hell are you?" Micah questioned. His tone was a swirl of anger and concern. "You've been gone all day and you haven't been answering your phone."

Julia sighed. She was still upset but she couldn't blame him for worrying. The last time she wasn't home when he thought she would be, she was on a plane to New York. "I had some things to do in Madison."

Her words did nothing to calm him. "What's going on? Caleb's wondering where you are. Is everything okay?"

Julia weighed whether it was worse to talk to Micah at the house or over the phone. She hated having intense conversations over the phone but it would minimize the opportunity for Caleb to overhear.  "I'll be back shortly. Tell Caleb I had to save him from starvation." She wanted to talk face to face, that way he had to look her in the eye when he tried to come up with an excuse.

She cursed her decision to venture into Madison as she was faced with unfamiliar roads and deteriorating driving conditions on the drive home. Nothing about this trip was going according to plan.

Silently, Julia carried the groceries into the house and began putting them away. As if he sensed something was wrong, Caleb quickly disappeared into the living room. Julia waited for Micah to say something because she was still clueless as to how to approach the situation. Rationally, she knew it was Karen's right to see her son. She didn't have a problem with that. Well, she did if Karen wound up hurting Caleb again, but she had no evidence of that so she had to assume everything was going well. The problem was that Micah had lied.

"Hey, are you okay?" Micah inquired looking utterly confused by the tension that followed Julia into the house.

Julia slammed the refrigerator closed and started making dinner without saying a word to him. Caleb was in the next room and she didn't trust herself to not scream if she opened her mouth. The slamming cupboards should be clue enough that everything was, in fact, not okay.

Micah eased his way into the kitchen, reaching for Julia's hand. "Hey, will you talk to me?"

She shrugged his calloused hand away and glared at him before quickly turning away. She felt tears welling in her eyes. How could she feel so much pain caused by one person and still love him?

Julia felt herself unraveling as both of his hands landed on her shoulders. "Julia, what in the hell is going on? Talk to me," he begged.

"Garage," she seethed as she headed to the sliding glass door behind the table. Micah followed without questioning her.

Immediately, Julia regretted calling him outside. Her sweater was no match for the clear, cold night. The only consolation was Micah was in an even worse state than she was. Dressed in an over-washed t-shirt, jeans and no shoes, Micah rubbed his arms in a vain attempt to warm himself.

"Now that we're freezing our asses off, what's going on?" he barked.

"Want to tell me about the errands you had to run today?" Julia asked, giving him one last chance to come clean. Everything that would happen over the course of the next eight days hinged on this one answer.

Micah looked confused by her accusatory tone for a moment before he dropped his gaze from hers. "I'm assuming you heard that I took Caleb to see his mom?" he asked.

He was being honest. It was a good start. How could one man be so willing to admit to the things he'd done wrong but couldn't understand that if he didn't hide things, there would be nothing to confess?

"No, I didn't hear it. I was privileged enough to see the three of you. Why did you lie to me about what you were doing? I thought we were being honest with each other this time," she spat.

"I didn't lie to you. I told you I had things to do," he said as if it was a completely legitimate argument.

Stunned silence filled the air. "And what about the times you told me you didn't know what was going on with her? Those weren't lies?" It made Julia sick to run through the possible reasons he would withhold information from her.

The last time he hadn't told her about Karen, it was because he was trying to make a relationship work with the mother of his child. Were they going to try again now that she was sober?

Micah took two steps towards her but stopped when he saw that she was matching his steps trying to back away. "Jules, she's Caleb's mom. She's trying to turn her life around and she wants to see her son. Am I supposed to tell her that she can't?"

His answer was almost too perfect, except that it didn't answer her question. If it was simply a matter of Karen seeing her son, it wouldn't be an issue. That wasn't the issue. The issue was that Julia only knew because she saw them. He didn't have enough trust in their relationship to tell her the truth. History was repeating itself.

"Don't. Do
not
make this about Caleb," she shot back at him, "This is about you and me. This is about you
lying
to me." The tears that threatened earlier began to fall. "You told me you didn't know what was going on with her. You didn't tell me you were taking Caleb to see her. Why? Why couldn't you tell me?" she sobbed.

This time, Julia didn't stop Micah when he came closer. "I'm sorry, I should have told you," he said, lifting her face until their eyes met. Gently, he brushed her tears with his thumb. "I was scared to tell you. I know that probably sounds weak but it is what it is. If I told you when you were back in New York, would you be here now?"

"I don't know," she bawled pounding her fists into his chest. There was truth in his words. She would have used Karen's presence in their lives as an excuse to stop trying to make their relationship work. It was hard enough trusting him while she was so far away. Knowing that his ex who wanted them back was here while she wasn't would have planted the seed of doubt that the distance between them would have nurtured.

"But why didn't you tell me this morning?" Her chest heaved with each sob she released.

Micah pressed her head to his chest and began softly rubbing her back. "Because I'm an idiot," he admitted.

"Well, at least you got one thing right today," Julia whispered.

"Now, can we go back in where it's warm if you want to keep talking? You're dressed a bit better for this weather than I am and you're shivering," he said through chattering teeth. Not only was he an idiot, he was a pansy about the cold.

Julia narrowed her eyes slightly. "I'm still pissed," she stated, "but yes, we can go inside." As she reached the side door, she turned back to Micah and pushed one finger into his chest. "This is strike two. There are no more chances."

Micah turned her around and started walking to the house with his arms wrapped around her, "I don't deserve any chances. I'm still trying to figure out what good I did in a past life that you're here at all."

Caleb eyed them suspiciously when Julia pulled the sliding door open but didn't ask any questions. Micah carried a load of wood into the living room and started a fire. After Caleb went to bed, he planned on telling Julia everything about Karen's recovery and the time she was spending with their son.

He wasn't ready to give up on his chance at happiness with Julia. It scared him to know that the odds were good that she would still leave once she knew everything.

Dinner was uncomfortable. Caleb spent the meal looking from Julia to Micah and back, trying to figure out what was going on. The adults spent much of the meal staring at their plates. They had been looking forward to spending the week together. Micah knew it was bound to be a painful week if he couldn't make things right.

Micah loaded the dishwasher while Julia ducked into her office to check email and call Krista. Caleb asked to go to his room and play Xbox. For the first time since they'd set up his bedroom, Micah was conceded that there were benefits to Caleb having a game system in his room.

The glow of the fire was the only light in the living room when Julia exited her office. There was a bottle of wine with two glasses sitting on the coffee table. For the second night in a row, Micah was showing her a charming side of himself she'd seldom experienced. She wasn't sure she could bring herself to enjoy the romance tonight. There was too much uncertainty looming between them.

When Julia hesitated, Micah stood and led her around the end of the sectional sofa handing her a glass of wine urging her to sit next to him. He tried to hide the disappointment when she curled into the opposite end of the couch. He stared at the dancing flames while she savored her drink, figuring he'd be lucky if she was ready to talk before the bottle was empty.

"This is nice. Thanks," she muttered as she refilled her glass.

"It was the least I could do." Micah shrugged. "Are you up for finishing our talk?" he asked hesitantly. Julia nodded and turned to face him.

In a move that could change his life forever, Micah decided to put everything on the table.

He started by explaining to Julia that Karen had gone to treatment directly from jail after she'd broken into the house. She was subjected to routine drug tests as part of her probation. At the urging of her counselor, Micah had started allowing Karen to see Caleb. He wouldn't be spending the night with Karen and they weren't allowed to go anywhere without supervision, but it was good for both of them. That wound up being the easy part of the conversation.

"Where is she living?" Julia asked. She was listening to everything Micah had to say and this was the first time she interrupted him.

Micah swallowed hard. He had started to think they were going to get through this. With her question, he was screwed whether he lied or told the truth. He nervously bit his lower lip as he tried to figure out how to move forward.

"Well..." he stammered, "She's...uh...she's living at Gran's." Just like ripping off a bandage, the truth was out.

Julia was furious. She had never understood what it meant to see red until that moment. She pinched her lips between her teeth while she composed herself. As soon as she trusted herself to not scream she said, "You mean to tell me that your ex-wife, the woman who attacked me in a bathroom and then broke into my house, is now living in the same house as you and your son? But she's--"

He cut her off before she could continue, "No, you told me to stay here. We don't live in the same house as her. She needed a place to stay, my room there is empty because I did as you told me to and moved my things here. The only belongings I have at Gran's now are some boxes in the attic."

Julia closed her eyes and took some deep breaths. It wasn't easy to stay calm with everything she was hearing. "Okay," she seethed, "So, you moved all of your stuff here. All of it?" She vaguely remembered the conversation when she told him to bring everything to the house since he was spending most of his time there and the house would be sitting empty otherwise.

Knowing that he had listened to her, that the majority of his possessions were now in this house, was unsettling. How had she been foolish enough to tell him to move in? After all, that is generally what it means when you tell someone to move everything into your home.

Tension was growing in the room. "Jules, you said--"

"I know it's what I said, dammit," she snipped. This was no time to have her words thrown back in her face. "It's just a lot to digest right now." In one swallow, the rest of her rather large goblet of wine was gone. Micah reached for the bottle and offered her a refill. She accepted, urging him to keep pouring until the glass was filled to the rim.

"Who's paying for her to live there?"

Teeth grazed Micah's lower lip again. It was a sure sign there wasn't going to be anything she wanted to hear coming from his mouth. "Well, I am. For now. But it's just until she can find a job and then she'll be paying all of her own bills."