Big Easy Temptation (29 page)

He hopped out of the Jeep. In the moonlight, she watched Dax point a finger at his
friend, stalking closer. Then the two men did that manly hug, beat-on-each-other’s-back
thing.

Connor had come all this way because he wouldn’t leave Dax without backup. When was
the last time she’d had a friend like that? Probably Joy.

Or had she pushed away another true friend because the woman happened to be Dax’s
sister? She brushed the thought aside and exited the Jeep. With Connor here, she was
firmly in Dax’s world again and she would have to remember that they weren’t really
alone. Only she was. He was surrounded by people who loved him. She’d lost those a
long time ago.

Even as she hopped out of the vehicle, she saw Connor size her up. Dax’s best friend
had always been a deep one, the dark to his light. Dax always seemed so sunny while
Connor obviously preferred the shadows. Sometimes she thought it would have been easier
if she’d fallen for Connor. That man would never have pushed her for more than a good
time in bed.

She wondered what his wife was like. It was hard to imagine him married. Likely she
was as dark and emotionless as Connor appeared.

“Holland,” he said, nodding her way.

“Hello, Connor.” Yes, it was going to be an awkward reunion all the way around, but
then what did she expect? Dax’s friends had spent years hating her for the way she’d
hurt him. Just because she’d had good reasons didn’t mean they would stop. “If you’ve
set aside a room for me, I’ll just go and get comfortable while you two catch up.”

A faint hint of a smile creased Connor’s mouth. “That will have to wait. My wife decided
to cook dinner. I’m so sorry, man. I hope you ate earlier.”

His wife was here? So she would have to put up with some cold-as-ice chick who had
likely been taught to hate her on sight. Awesome.

“It’s not that bad,” Dax said. “It’s just very vegan.”

The door opened and a slight figure stepped out. Lara Sparks was wearing a bright
sundress, her dark hair piled in a messy, ten-pound updo of curls on her head. Even
in the dim light, she could see the woman had huge blue eyes.

“Holland!” Petite Lara came at her with a smile and pulled Holland into an embrace,
her head resting on Holland’s shoulder. “It’s so good to meet you. You’re like the
missing piece of the family.”

Holland looked to Connor, utterly surprised by his affectionate, vegan bride.

He simply shrugged. “Yeah, let her get it out of her system. She’s a hugger.”

Lara’s head snapped up and she turned her husband’s way. “Human beings need physical
affection, and after everything Holland’s been through, she likely needs a good hug,
especially since she’s been exiled for so long for a crime she didn’t commit.”

“She was in New Orleans. No one sent her away,” Connor pointed out.

Lara stepped back. “She’s Dax’s one true love.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t say that.” Holland didn’t want to mislead Lara.

“She’s right,” Dax said with a nod. “I’ve learned that Lara has a deep understanding
of the people around her. I think because of all the yoga she does.”

Lara glanced between Holland and Connor with a frown. “Connor, don’t you want to give
Holland a hug to welcome her back into the family?”

Holland shook her head. “He’s already said hello. We’re cool.”

Connor’s face broke into the most open smile she’d ever seen on the man. He stepped
forward, and before Holland could protest, he’d put his arms around her. “I never
argue with my wife. I’m sorry it’s been so long, Holland. But you’re a dumbass who
should have asked for help three years ago.”

“Connor!” Lara protested.

Holland laughed and hugged him back, feeling better than she had in forever. “You’re
the dumbass, Sparks.”

He nodded and stepped back. “Maybe. I definitely shouldn’t have listened to his drunk
ass when he claimed you were the devil. Come on in, Kirk. I brought along some Scotch.
Let’s all sit down and have a drink and figure out what the hell we’re going to do.
Oh, and you can meet Freddy.”

Lara nodded. “Give me a minute. I need to make sure he’s not in firing position.”
She jogged back into the cabin. “Freddy, it’s all right. They’re not feds. Or aliens.
Just Dax and his one true love.” A low, masculine voice rumbled before Lara spoke
again. “Okay, so she’s kind of a fed, but the good kind. Yes, there is a good kind,
mister. There is good in everyone, damn it. Well, all right, you have a point. There’s
no good in Reticulan Grays.”

Connor sighed. “Sorry, we let Freddy watch a documentary on ancient aliens. He’s all
about abductions now. You’ll have to forgive him. He’s actually quite brilliant.”

“He’s a fucking maniac,” Dax said. “And I’m having a talk with him about his paranoia.”

Holland lingered outside with Connor. “Will he really shoot at me? Because I’ve already
had that happen once today.”

“Freddy, no. I’m not going to, either. I’m sorry, Holland. I should have followed
my instincts.”

“Your instincts?”

“When Dax told me what you had done, my first thought was fuck no. I should have followed
that thought through, but I was scared to.”

“Scared?” Was Connor afraid of anything?

“Because Dax was already married.” He took a long breath and stared out over the water.
The cabin was roughly twenty feet from the bayou. She could see what looked like a
pier and a boat at the end of it. “I worried that if I discovered I was right, I would
have to tell him he’d fucked up his whole life. And yours.”

“I’m good, Sparks,” she lied. “I did what I had to do, and I’ve made my peace with
it.”

Connor scoffed. “You’re so full of shit. He won’t give up, you know. He’s missed you.”

“He was married to Courtney for two years, so I question that assessment.”

That truth was the hardest pill to swallow. Dax hadn’t woken up, realized he’d made
a colossal mistake, and gotten a quickie divorce. He’d stayed married to Courtney
until the woman had left him.

“He was embarrassed. His decision to stay with her was more about you than anything
else. He didn’t want to look foolish or like he couldn’t move on. Deep down I think
he decided if he couldn’t have the woman he wanted, he might as well give it a try
with someone else.”

If Holland could have removed herself from the scenario, Dax’s actions made sense.
But she couldn’t. “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“It does. I would have agreed with you on this a few months ago. I would have told
Dax to move on and find someone else if he absolutely had to get married and do the
family thing. But I figured something out.”

“What’s that?”

“People aren’t interchangeable. There’s only one Lara in the entire world. She’s the
only one who could . . . I don’t know.” He shrugged. “Complete me. Just saying that
makes me feel as if I have a discernable estrogen level, but it’s true. Dax can’t
move on because you’re the one woman in the world for him. You have been for a very
long time. I remember the day he met you. He called me and told me he’d met the future
Mrs. Spencer. I told him he was insane. But he was right.”

“I seriously doubt I’m the one woman for him, Sparks. He’s just feeling guilty about
not fighting harder three years ago. But I didn’t want him to fight. He did exactly
what I intended him to and I don’t regret it.” Even as she said the words, Holland
knew she was lying to herself, but she couldn’t lay her feelings bare to Connor or
Dax or anyone. She couldn’t tell anyone how she’d mourned him. “We weren’t together
very long. It was brief and intense, and at the end of the day, it was a good thing
we broke up because it wouldn’t have worked.”

Except he’d said he was going to leave the Navy for her. She would have happily moved
to D.C. if he’d been there.

But he wasn’t and the time had passed. Now she knew what it meant to be without him,
and she couldn’t let herself fall in love with him again.

“If you say so. But you should know that Dax is pretty good at getting what he wants,
and there’s no doubt he wants you.”

“And what if I told you I’m just going to use him? I’m going to sleep with him and
get him out of my system. And at the end of all this, I’m going to walk away.” She’d
thought about it the whole drive out here. She wasn’t sure she could stay away from
Dax physically. The heat between them was far too strong. Maybe if she gave in, she
would realize that her memory was faulty. They couldn’t be as good together as she
remembered.

It would help her if Connor told Dax to stay away from her. Dax might actually listen
to his best friend.

Connor grinned. “I’m going with my gut this time, Kirk. You can
talk all the smack you want, but you loved him then. You can tell yourself that you’re
getting him out of your system, but you love him now. That’s all that matters. You’re
the type of woman who gives her heart away once. It won’t ever happen again. Oh, you
might fool yourself into believing you could be content with someone else. You might
be able to date another guy and sleep beside him, but when it comes down to really
committing, you won’t be able to. You’ll always say no because deep down, you will
always be waiting for Dax. Like that cop found out. Bet he wants to strangle whoever
uploaded that sucker to YouTube. Let’s get inside and see what fresh horror my wife
has created with tofu.”

Holland watched as Connor ducked inside, worried that his words would prove all too
true.

D
ax sat back as Freddy pointed to a whiteboard. Apparently one of the first things
Lara had done when Connor had secured this place a few days back was to set up a conspiracy
room. The cabin belonged to a wealthy businessman who had donated heavily to Zack’s
campaign, and he’d been eager to allow any of Zack’s friends to use his little cabin
on the bayou, as Connor had explained. Dax had to wonder if the dude would be so eager
if he could see the way his den was being used.

There were whiteboards, sticky notes, and taped-up papers covering what used to be
a lovely room. Everywhere Dax looked along the far wall was some note or thought of
Freddy’s.

“So you believe Joy was killed in order to ensure that Zack won the election.” Holland
sat on the floor, her legs crossed and her blond hair held up by a pencil she’d poked
through her bun.

He supposed it was practical, but all it did was make him want to touch the soft skin
at the nape of her neck. He could run his nose over it, filling his lungs with her
scent before he kissed her. She would shiver and then he could haul her close.

He was so damn horny. He couldn’t even concentrate on the case because all he could
focus on was the fact that they would have to share a room. The cabin only had two
bedrooms and one couch. Freddy had explained he rarely slept in a bed anyway, so he
was happy to take the sofa.

“Yes, I believe that’s why Joy Hayes was eliminated. I’ve theorized a number of reasons
the same people would want to kill the admiral as well,” Freddy explained.

In the last few months, the dude had put on some muscle. Apparently fleeing from government
agents and losing himself deep in the Appalachian wilderness had done wonders for
Freddy’s physique. He looked like a Special Forces soldier, with the single exception
of the long hair he kept in a queue.

Was Holland staring at Freddy because the dude was crazy, or did she think he was
hot?

Because Dax was pretty sure he was hotter than Freddy. And sane. Mostly.

“We think he knew something,” Holland said with a smile the paranoid guy’s way.

Lara nodded and stood beside Freddy. “Absolutely. The only question is, what? Dax,
are you aware that your father had several articles concerning Joy Hayes’s death on
his person at the time of his arrest?”

That made Dax sit up straight and focus on something other than his jealousy. “No.”

“It’s in the police report,” Freddy said.

Holland frowned. “I remember that when they arrested your dad, they logged the contents
of his briefcase when he went through processing. According to that report he had
ten pages of
New York Times
and
Washington Post
articles inside, dated a few days prior. How can you be sure the articles were about
Joy?”

“The page counts match up with what he would have torn out of
the paper. I reconstructed the main articles, pieced them together, and came up with
a theory. It’s conjecture, but I feel strongly about it,” Freddy said with a nod.

“So you think the Russian mob learned about this trip and set him up?” During dinner,
they’d gone over what they’d found out the day before.

Freddy had confirmed the pictures had not been taken at the same place or time the
police believed. He’d also scanned one of the pictures into the computer and managed
to isolate the numbers on a glowing clock far in the background. According to Amber
Taylor’s police statement, the incident with the admiral had occurred between seven
and ten p.m., while the clock in the pictures displayed a time of two twelve in the
morning.

Dax had handed the rest of the photographs to Freddy. Lara’s former neighbor might
be crazy but damn he was good.

“Not necessarily,” Connor said. “It may simply have been the easiest place to drug
your father and set up the situation. I need to know why he was in London before I
can really decide.”

“I’ll sneak back into town tomorrow and talk to my mother.” He would have to. His
mother was the only one who might remember.

“Good. Ask her if she knows anything about a connection between your father and Zack’s
mom,” Lara said.

“Constance Hayes?” Holland asked, obviously surprised. She turned to Dax. “They knew
each other, right? You guys went to school together for years.”

Dax chuckled. How little she understood about their lives. “Zack’s mom wasn’t exactly
the type to show up for parents’ weekend. Half the time his dad didn’t make it, either.”

“And when summer break rolled around, they would either put Zack in some summer academic
program or leave him with a nanny. Excuse me, I believe they called her a companion.
Most of the time they hired grandmotherly types, but I remember that summer we were
all
sixteen, someone fucked up and hired an undergrad.” Connor nodded Dax’s way. “Ah,
the great cover-up. I was staying with Dax and we convinced his parents that we were
going to spend a week in New York with Gabe and Mad.”

Holland smiled. “Who I’m sure decided to tell their parents that they were spending
it with you guys. And Roman?”

“He was supposed to be interning at Crawford legal,” Dax admitted. “We all went out
to the beach and convinced the undergrad to bring some friends. Good times, man. Well,
for everyone else.” He was suddenly aware that he shouldn’t tell those stories with
such relish anymore. “I was just there for the beer.”

“Me, too.” Connor gave him a thumbs-up. “But the other guys had an orgy.”

Lara groaned and threw a pillow at her husband’s head. “Such a manwhore. I’m going
to bed, where we’re not having sex. Maybe ever.”

Connor’s lips curled up in a wolfish grin. “Want to bet?”

Lara’s cheeks heated. “No. You cheat.”

“Damn straight I do.” He followed his wife when she ran off to the bedroom. “See you
guys in the morning.”

Freddy sighed. “So ask your mother about any connections between your father and Constance
Hayes.”

Dax could barely remember a time the two had been in the same room . . . except when
they’d interrupted his first kiss with Holland. “Any particular reason why?”

Holland scooted up and onto the couch beside him. It took everything he had not to
pull her closer. “Do you think he was in England because of her?”

“Zack’s mom had been dead for something like five years by then.” It suddenly hit
him. “Shit. But she died in England. And her name was on that list. I wonder if my
dad knew about the dead pool? Have you made heads or tails of the other names on there?”

Freddy set down his marker and stretched. “I’m working on it. A few of the names are
Russian nationals, and one or two died right
around the time Natalia went to work for the Hayes family. It’s not easy to get almost-forty-year-old
Soviet documents. It could take me a couple of days, if they even exist anymore. I
have a network in place. It’s a matter of running them down. The Russian I know is
a little touchy. Last I heard he thought Putin was after him, so he’s probably hiding
in Siberia.”

“Isn’t Siberia where they send dissidents?” Holland asked.

“Yeah, hide in plain sight, man. That’s Oleg’s way. That and drinking a lot of vodka.
I’m going to pop into town and pick up a few things. There’s an all-night Walmart
about ten miles away. I need tinfoil. Who doesn’t have tinfoil? It makes me wonder
about the guy who owns this cabin. Can I take your Jeep? I walked in.”

Dax tossed him the keys because he wasn’t certain if Freddy had walked in from the
bus stop or whatever transportation he’d chosen, or if he meant he’d literally walked
from the East Coast. “Sure, man.”

“I’ll be back. Oh, and I might have put some traps around the house. You really shouldn’t
go too far. Night.”

Dear god. Dax prayed Freddy hadn’t put in land mines. But he wouldn’t put it past
the crazy bastard.

The door closed, and suddenly he was alone with Holland and about a thousand questions.
Literally. They were surrounded by whiteboards covered in questions. But the one he
most wanted answered wasn’t anywhere on the wall.

“Do you think you’ll ever forgive me?”

She stood abruptly. “I already have. There’s nothing to forgive, not really.”

“I married Courtney.”

“We weren’t together at the time. You were perfectly free to marry anyone you chose.”

That had to be her pride talking. And her fear.

“I chose you. Damn it, Holland. I chose you, not her. It was a horrible mistake and
one I regretted the minute I sobered up.” He couldn’t explain to her how hollow he’d
felt when he realized what he’d done.

“You must have decided it wasn’t such a terrible mistake since you didn’t divorce
her right away.”

At least they were talking about it. “Courtney and I discussed it. I wanted to, but
the press had caught the story and I didn’t want to embarrass my family any more.
It was stupid, but pride was all I had at the time. And I had to protect Mom and Gus.
So Courtney and I stayed married. I shipped out a week later. You were lost to me.
And I was so angry.”

It had been the worst time of his life. After losing his father and believing the
worst about him, Holland had seemingly betrayed him. He hadn’t been able to fill the
hole in his heart until he’d recently realized that she’d never meant to hurt him.

“I might be able to buy that for six months, not two years,” Holland pointed out.

“And I was at sea almost every one of those days. It was easy to forget that I was
married. I gave her money and let her get an apartment that I spent exactly two nights
in. Did I try to make it work? Not really. I might have thought I was at the time,
but I was fooling myself. I knew it wouldn’t work for the same reason you knew it
wouldn’t work with Chad. She wasn’t you.”

She shook her head, biting her lip as her gaze slid away. “I don’t think we can go
back.”

“Then let’s move forward.” He closed the distance between them, unwilling to be parted
from her a minute more. “What happened is in the past. It doesn’t define us. I only
know how damn much I need you now. I can’t breathe I want you so much. The only question
is do you want me, too?”

Her head snapped up. She met his stare, both uncertainty and heat flaring in her eyes.
“I’ve always wanted you. No one has ever made me feel the way you do, Dax. In bed.
Out of bed. Good and bad. It’s always you.”

Bitterness rang in her tone, but he ignored it and chose to focus on the positive.
If he could get her into bed, get her underneath him, he
could remind her just how good he could make her feel. He could also show her how
much he cared. She wouldn’t be able to turn away from him then. Once he was back in
her bed, he would bind her to him and never let her go.

He sank his fingers into the silk of her hair. “I need you, Holland. My life has been
a wreck without you in it.”

She shook her head but didn’t attempt to wriggle free. “I want you, too. I can’t seem
to help it. The minute you walk in a room, my body comes alive. But that doesn’t change
anything between us. It doesn’t fix anything.”

She was the one fooling herself if she thought making love again wouldn’t right a
few wrongs between them. He’d take that bet. It would change everything for him, and
he suspected it would do the same for her.

He lowered his head down and layered his lips over hers.

Sweet perfection. Kissing Holland was more intimate than sex with all the other women
combined. When he kissed Holland, he could feel them aligning, communicating on a
level he knew he never would with anyone else.

Her arms wound around him, and Dax knew he had her. Now there would be no flying bullets,
no interruptions. He had the night with her and he intended to make it count.

Over and over he kissed her, reminding himself of her taste and the sweet way she
fit against his body. He would learn her all over again.

With a little whimper, she gave in and tugged at his T-shirt with a desperation that
sent his blood racing. He pulled it over his head, tossing it to the side. Holland
flattened her palms against his skin and he could see the sleepy expression of desire
in her eyes as she looked him over. She caressed his chest slowly, as if assuring
herself that he was real. He forced himself to remain still but he couldn’t stop the
groan that escaped his chest. It had been so damn long since he’d felt her skin against
his. He closed his eyes and let the sensation take over.

Holland brushed warm palms over his shoulders and pecs, tracing
the lines of his muscles down to his abs. She spread her hands apart, continuing her
exploration a bit lower.

Her shocked gasp forced him to open his eyes. She’d found his latest scar.

“That’s a bullet wound.” She touched the puckered scar on his left side, right above
his hipbone.

Naturally, she would know exactly what had caused the scar. He would be able to shrug
and tell any other woman that it was an unfortunate cigar burn or something, but not
a woman who had been around guns all her life. “We ran into a small incident back
a few months ago. Connor, Gabe, and I had a little run-in with our Russian friends.
The good news is, they’re dead and I’m alive.”