I refused to lunge. “That’s not exactly news.”
“You might want to read it before you weep.” Vicki’s eyebrow arched so sharply I thought its inky end might reach out and lash me.
I pretended to concentrate on the brief as Vicki pranced away. I eyed the newspaper out of the corner of my eye. I tried to ignore its lure. I didn’t want to know what he was doing because it would make it harder for me to stay away. I had hurt him so bad I didn’t know if he would forgive me, babies or not.
I gave in, grabbed the paper and turned to page thirteen.
There was an entertainment article from Winslow O’Leary:
CHICAGO’S CLOSER NO CLOSER TO CLOSING THE DEAL
It has come to this reporter’s attention, and most of the fans in this city have noticed, that our all-time best closing pitcher is in a slump. He hasn’t completed a single inning since opening day. When he’s out on the mound, he just doesn’t have it anymore. We all know about the tragic loss he suffered early this year. But rumor has it he and his wife,
LIBBY
, are expecting twins at the end of the year. So, Band-Aid Palowski should have reasons enough to turn his game around.
Although, his wife has been missing from the family section at the friendly confines, no one has spotted her anywhere other than her new legal offices in Rodgers Park. Possibly, Mrs. Palowski is too busy defending the downtrodden to sit through endless innings on the North side.
There are rumors, that
AIDAN
has become quite attached to Darcy Crooner who came to town first to help with a Public Service Announcement for his charity, Cass’ Game, and several times since as a gesture of friendship. When questioned as to her intentions, she stated, “Aidan
NEEDS
a friend right now, and that’s all that we are.”
They were seen dining at Darcy’s hotel, but it seemed to be a business meeting. When she took the elevator to her room, he drove away from the hotel. I’ve never doubted this man and his love for his wife but
YOU
never know someone until you walk a mile in his shoes. So for
NOW
, we can hope for a speedy reconciliation between the hometown hero and the game.
I read the highlighted words. ‘Libby, Aidan needs you now.’
Tears flowed down my cheeks and my guts wrenched. I couldn’t blame him. I’d sent him away.
“What the hell are you going to do?” Vicki pointed to the paper as she collapsed in her office chair across from me.
“What do you want me to do? It’s not like I didn’t drive him to it. It’s been two months.”
“You’re giving him an out, if he’s been unfaithful?”
I hesitated and my eyes filled with tears. “If he has, isn’t my fault? Didn’t I break the vows first? Aren’t you supposed to cling unto one another in times of need?”
“Okay, so if he was unfaithful, you’ll forgive him, but you’re not going to see that it doesn’t go on?”
I couldn’t meet her eyes. “What should I do?”
“What should you have done weeks ago? You’re going to put your perfect little pregnant body into the sexiest thing you have.” She froze for a moment, one of her hare-brained ideas taking root. “No, no, that little yellow sundress, the one you wouldn’t let me give away to charity. The one you said Aidan asked you to wear sometime.”
“That will no longer cover these boobs.”
Vicki winked at me. “That’s the whole point.”
“What am I going to say?”
“You’re going to choke out a sorry, tell him how wrong you’ve been, and beg for forgiveness.”
“He won’t listen.”
“Then you’re going to tell him you sleep with his letters under your pillow, call out his name in your sleep, and place your hand over your belly when anyone says his name. You’re going to tell him he’s the only man you’ve ever loved. And then you’re going to tell him losing Cass was the worst thing in your entire life, and you only survived because you loved him just as much as you loved Cass. And all that will be the truth, right?”
I lowered my head. “Yes, that’s all true.”
Vicki got up and pulled me to my feet. “Go see him.”
“Now?”
“There’s no time like the present. He has a noon game, go change, go to the will-call window at the ballpark and tell them who you are. After the game, someone will show you where the players come out.”
I made it to the ballpark by the middle of the second inning. My stomach was rolling, and my breasts were aching from the tightness of the top. Once I put it on, and looked at myself in the mirror I broke out in hysterical laughter. In another month the thing wouldn’t wrap around my breasts. I had to wear jeans under it because it was too short and worn to go otherwise. A tan sweater wrap helped cover the overflow.
When I found my seat, several beautiful women sitting alone smiled at me knowingly. A couple of them had small children sitting alongside them and over the course of the game I could name their fathers, based on their banter.
Aidan wasn’t pitching. Butterflies grew in me. He was close-at-hand. Even if I couldn’t see him, I certainly felt him.
When the game came to an end, one of the women introduced herself and showed me where to wait for the players after the game. We walked down the concrete ramps of the stadium to the deepest level; I stood against the cold concrete wall and thought about what to say. As time passed, the crowd of those waiting diminished. Finally, I was alone, except for one other woman, who moved closer and closer to the locker room door as the others dissipated. It would have been difficult to ignore her, even if she wasn’t well-known, both in the music industry and the movies. She also had a thing for professional athletes and had as recently as today been linked to my husband.
The tight knot in my stomach doubled. I wished I could disappear. The fact that I felt like a small whale didn’t help. I was only four months pregnant, but I looked larger. I watched as she tossed her chestnut, waist-length hair over her shoulder when the locker room door opened. From where I was standing, no one would see me if they didn’t turn around.
My heart stopped beating when I saw Aidan. He smiled at Darcy and she waved tentatively. Then as another person exited the locker room, a smile spread across her face. She jumped into the second man’s arms. Mitch Ackermann had finally found his own leggy brunette.
The concrete wall held me up. I wanted to chisel out the mortar and crawl into a crack. I was shaking. In an instant, I decided it was better if we didn’t meet like this. I didn’t want him to think I had come back for the wrong reasons.
Mitch and Darcy started away, hand-in-hand, and Aidan followed behind them a few steps. He came to a complete halt, shaking his head, like he was shedding rain water. The love-birds didn’t notice he wasn’t trailing them. He let them get several yards away before he turned and focused on my exact location, as if my GPS had set off his internal tracking system. I jumped.
As he walked toward me, his eyes traveled the length of my body. His eyes settled on mine. When he was an arm’s length away from me, he stopped and drew in a deep breath. He closed his eyes, and when he opened them I could almost hear his silent prayer for patience.
“What brings you here, Mrs. Palowski?” His clipped tone was mildly condescending. “Come to check in, or see if I was remaining faithful to the wife who abandoned me?” He had worked himself up to seething mad in a matter of seconds.
I swallowed down. When I had enough courage, my gaze sought his. “I wouldn’t blame you, if you hadn’t been faithful.”
“Did you come to give me permission?” He was shaking, I assumed, from barely contained rage.
I winced. Under his intense scrutiny, my eyes wandered to his highly polished shoes. I raised my head. “You’ve always been free to do as you choose. I’d hope you remained faithful to me because you love me.” I strangled the words out. “I hope you still love me, and can find it in your heart to forgive me.”
His hands went to his lean hips. “You’re not here because I’ve been begging you to come back to me. You’re here because of the crap you read in this morning’s paper.”
“No, that’s not why.”
He waited for me to continue without speaking.
“I miss you desperately.”
“I’m glad you’ve learned about desperation.”
“Aidan, please, I’m sorry.” I wanted to pull him toward me by the ears and make him listen.
“Not good enough, Mrs. Palowski.”
I pulled the last trick out of my bag. “Cass wouldn’t want this. He’d wanted us together.”
Aidan’s eyes shot to mine. “What’s standing between us now has nothing to do with Cass. It’s about you and me. When you get that, I’ll be around.”
He turned on his heel and didn’t look back, even when I started to cry. I wanted to rant and rave, but all he wanted was to know that I loved him. He was done telling me first.
So I was going to have to suck it up and tell him, by the time I’d worked up the courage and was ready to scream it from the top of my lungs, he was gone. I made my way out of the stadium. I’d go see him at home later. I was determined to resolve this with him today, and he was in for it because I had other ways of getting to him. I had certain charms he couldn’t resist, even if he wanted to, and I had never unleashed the full extent of them on him before.
When I arrived back at the office I walked in on a dispute between two Hispanic women in the reception area. I had no idea why Vicki hadn’t already resolved the issue. Fights were hardly unnatural events, and we were starting to become a little flippant about it.
Vicki flounced up the hallway. “Evita’s in your office.”
I looked up from the mail. “What’s going on with them?”
“They’re your next clients.” She narrowed her eyes. “You don’t have the glow you normally have after a rendezvous with your husband.”
“He’s playing hard-ball. I’ll dazzle him tonight. If he sees me in this dress and nothing else, he’ll cooperate.”
“You promise.”
“Don’t worry. Now, try to make sure they don’t murder each other, and I’ll be ready for them after I speak to Evita. They’re acting like they’re fighting over the same man.”
“They are. He’s married to both of them.”
Oh Geez
. I started into my office and I was shocked after my first perusal of Evita. She looked like death frozen over and she had lost at least twenty pounds. “Hey, how are you?” I greeted her with a hug, searching her sunken cheeks up close.
“I came to say good-bye. I’m going to Columbia.”
“Does Tony know?”
She smiled grimly. “Yes, he knows.”
“Is he going with you?”
“No, he forbids it.”
I raised a brow. “Forbid?”
She laughed herself. “As if he thinks that will stop me. I knew you’d understand. You might be the only person who knows how far a mother would go for her child.”
I pulled her into the chair next to mine. “I do, but Tony has to be afraid for you. If you get close enough to Espinoza to get Manny, he’ll be close enough to kill you.”
“That won’t be necessary. He assured me he doesn’t want me dead, he just wants me back. For whatever reason, I believe him.” She folded her hands in her lap in acceptance.
“You spoke to him?” I got up and shut the door.
“He called me. He knows where I am, and he said that Manny is fine. And if I want reassurances, I only have to come back. I can live the rest of my life with Manny under his watchful eye.”
“You can’t go back. He’ll kill you. You have to know that.”
“I can’t believe you’re concerned about me. If I would’ve stayed where I belonged, your son wouldn’t be dead.”
“I haven’t had a chance to talk to you. If Cass hadn’t died that day, he would be dead by now, anyway. His cancer spread.”
“I’m so sorry.” She wiped away tears. “Either way, I’m dead. It’s only a matter of time. At least this way I can see Manny one more time. Enrique will want to play with me for a bit before he disposes of me.”
“So that’s it? You’re going to sacrifice yourself?”
She smiled and patted my hand. “Wouldn’t you?”
I swallowed down. She was right in regards to how I felt for Cass. But now I had another reason to live—times two. I smiled at her. “I’m going to have a baby. Actually, two babies.”
She smiled and tears crested her eyes before she hugged me, “I’m happy for you and for Aidan. I had wondered, but I didn’t want to impose on your privacy. I wish I would’ve known. I would have delayed my flight for another day to celebrate.”
“It’s all right. Your good wishes are enough.”
She handed me two envelopes. One was sealed, and the other was open and full of cash. “What’s this?”
“That should cover your legal fees. I’ve stayed this long because I wanted to repay you before I left.”
I forced the money back into her hand. “Where you’re going, this might be the difference between life and death. I don’t want it, and I don’t need it.” I forced her fingers around it. “What’s this other one for?”
“It’s for Tony. When you find out what becomes of me, give it to him. If Espinoza dies or goes to jail, ask Tony to find Manny for me. Tell him it was my wish.” She moved to her feet, pushing me away as I tried to understand.
“Evita, I don’t understand. What happened with Tony?”
She didn’t respond at first, but I followed her down the hall. “It doesn’t matter now,
Bella
. It doesn’t matter.” And she blew me an air kiss as she threw her bag over her shoulder.
I closed my eyes and drew in a deep breath. Vicki was ushering the two fighting women into my office. I scanned the waiting area, where a bearded man struggled to his feet. He was wearing a heavy trench coat and something about the way he moved was familiar. I stepped behind the desk and felt along the edge for the panic button. The inner office door opened, and an elderly man in an old baseball cap and bow tie stepped into the reception area. My eyes locked with his, before I looked back at the bearded man who was lifting a sawed-off shotgun. His identity came to me with a dawning realization—Rat Bastard.
The elderly man in the baseball cap said, “Cass sent me,” just as a round went off, shattering the ceiling.