Blizzard (The Brotherhood Journals #1) (6 page)

I wanted her back. I wanted to see myself reflected back at me.

And if that’s what I wanted, then I needed to fight for her and prove that she was still here.

“Hey, man!” I looked up to see Optimus walking over to me. I’d just finished cleaning my bike and the bitch was fucking sparkling. Just how I liked it. “Any chance you can shoot round and pick up Jayla from Lucy’s place. One of the other girls called in sick at X-Rated and Luce has to cover for her.”

He held out the keys to his truck. “Sure, but where’s Chel? Thought you’d get her to do it.”

He came closer and dropped the keys into my outstretched hand.

“We’d go, but she’s been having some issues with her co-ordination lately, and I want to take her up to the hospital and get her checked.” I could see the concerned look on my brother’s face.

“Shit,” I muttered. Chelsea did pretty well these days, even getting back into her regular running routine.

He nodded. “Yeah. I just hope she hasn’t been pushing herself too hard.”

I had to smile, that girl was strong and determined. Op had been lucky to find such a perfect Old Lady.

“Look after your girl. I’ll head over and grab the squirt,” I called over my shoulder as I headed for his truck which was parked at the edge of the compound.

“Thanks, man!”

Jayla was nearly five years old. Her mom, Hayley, had been a stripper at X-Rated. Unfortunately, she was caught in the crossfire during our short confrontation with the DePalma family, and Marco DePalma, Rose’s father, had killed her right outside the strip club.

Jayla’s father was unknown and Hayley’s family had thrown her out on her ass because she’d gotten pregnant at such a young age. That thought alone made me furious. She was just a kid trying to raise a kid. She didn’t deserve to be tossed out to fend for herself. It’s times like this I’m thankful for the club. We were family, stronger because we built our family together. Without the club who knows where I’d be now. After my mother left, it definitely wasn’t my father who raised me, he was too busy drinking and going out on club business to care where his teenage son was. It was the old ladies and club members that made sure I had a home and people to watch out for me. They taught me the real meaning of family.

So far we had managed to keep Jayla out of the system, putting off court hearings and making sure we had our shit sorted before we stepped up and made a claim for her. Because in our eyes she was ours, she was one of us, and there was no way in fucking hell that a judge was going to deny us our right.

I jogged up to Lucy’s apartment and banged on the door. It squeezed open just a few inches and I looked down to see two bright eyes staring up at me.

“Hey, squirt.” Her nose crinkled, but it wasn’t long before I saw a little smile. Jayla didn’t talk much. None of us were sure if it was because she’d lost her mom or whether she’d always been that way. Hayley had only been with us a short time before she was killed, so no one had really got to know them very well. “You ready to go?”

She pulled the door open a little further and held out her little princess backpack for me to take. I rolled my eyes, but took it from her hands and threw it over my shoulder.

“Hey, Blizz. Thanks for coming so quickly.” Lucy came down the hallway, handbag swung over her arm as she attempted to put her earring in her ear. “I have to be on stage in half an hour.”

“No prob. We got this.” I rubbed Jayla’s hair and she looked up at me and huffed. She’d obviously been spending too much time with Harlyn because the attitude was coming through loud and clear.

Lucy picked her up and walked with me to the truck, buckling her into the booster seat in the back and giving her a quick peck on the cheek.

“Bye!” she called with a quick wave as she jogged over to her own car and climbed in. How she even walked in those heels, I’ll never know but they were sexy as hell.

While the brothers had rules about sleeping with the strippers who worked for us, I’d had my fair share of them. Lucy was no exception. She was hot, sexy, and all kinds of kinky in the bedroom. But she was also never one to cling and that’s how I liked it.

“All right, to the clubhouse,” I said and climbed in the truck. I looked over my shoulder and Jayla’s face beamed back at me. She may have lost her mom, and there was nothing that was going to take that pain away but, at least, we knew she was happy.

The drive through town was busy with everyone heading home from work. I groaned as I sat backed up at a stoplight, we weren’t moving at all. My hands itched on the steering wheel. If I had my bike, this wouldn’t be a fucking issue.

“She’s pretty like Mama.” My eyes widened at Jayla’s words. It was probably the most I’d ever heard come out of her mouth in one go.

“Who, Jay?” I asked. Her little finger tapped on the window, so I turned to look at where she was pointing.

My stomach sank.

She looked just like I remembered her. Long dark hair flowing freely down her back, tight jean shorts that showed off her tanned athletic legs, and a crop top that showed just enough to tease a man.

Rose.

She was in town.

My heart stopped and I wasn’t sure if it was anger I felt building in my stomach or need. Maybe a mixture of the both. I watched as she hustled down the sidewalk, her head down so I couldn’t see her face. But I knew it was her. I would know her anywhere. I had her body memorized.

Car horns sounded startling me and I realized there was no longer anyone in front of me and the light was green. I wanted to jump out of the truck and follow her. Demand to know why she was here, but I couldn’t. There was nowhere to turn around and the only way I could go was forward.

I cursed and slammed my hand on the wheel as I floored the accelerator and took off. My hands were shaking and my head was screaming for me to pull over and go back. Go and find her. Go to her. I wanted to yell, I wanted to scream, I wanted to tell her what I thought of her. But mostly I just wanted to fucking wrap her in my arms and feel her.

Rose made me crazy. She made me feel so many different emotions at once. I’d seen her with fire in her eyes once. Over the few weeks I’d known her, I’d slowly watched that fire shrink to a barely flickering flame. At the time all I’d wanted to do was bring it back, to see her face light up again. But now I knew what was going on behind closed doors, I know it would have been close to impossible.

She was hurting. Hurting in a way that a lot of us would find completely inconceivable. I could relate. Her dad spent his time making her feel worthless and unworthy of his love. He broke her down, made her feel like she had no other options but him.

I squeezed the steering wheel in my hands. The memory of what he did to her made me furious, it made me want to take a visit to the prison and ensure that he was never given the opportunity to hurt again.

Rose suffered—she was manipulated and confused.

He doused her fire and I wondered whether she would ever get it back. Even now, I ached to see the light that I’d once seen in her. But the anger of being hurt and deceived flooded me every time I even thought of her. I could only imagine what would come out of my mouth if I saw her face to face.

My brain was so confused, understanding that there was a reason that she lied and did the things she did. But angry because of how close I’d allowed myself to get to her, including all that I’d offered so I could keep her safe. Then she still turned around and ripped a knife through my back.

Pulling up at the clubhouse, the place seemed pretty empty. I knew there was a big rival football game going on in Huntsville, and with the club now working hard on our security firm, Op had taken the contract. We didn’t wear our club cuts while we were working for the company, but with the majority of us over six foot and covered in tattoos, we were already a force to be reckoned with.

Opening my door, I walked around to help Jayla out of the truck. I could feel my muscles were coiled tightly after seeing Rose.

“Harlyn?” Jayla asked curiously. I looked over my shoulder to see Sugar’s sporty red car parked just at the edge of the compound.

“Guess so, kiddo. Why don’t you go find her?” I lifted her from the seat and she wrapped her arms around my neck. She squeezed me in a hug and it surprised me for a second.

Jayla and I were close. Her shy nature kept her pretty quiet around the boys. But since she’d seen me interacting with Harlyn, she’d opened up a lot. My heart warmed and she let me go, wiggling for me to put her down. I placed her feet on the gravel and she took off running, shooting around the side of the clubhouse to the spot where we both knew Harlyn would be playing–the playground out back. She lived for it.

I stared at her for a minute. Completely in awe. I wondered if maybe she could feel my emotions and that was her response to them. The thought floored me as I walked into the clubhouse. The room was empty, but I could hear soft voices talking nearby. Frowning I headed for the meeting room in which we held church, the doors were open but the people inside didn’t notice my presence.

“There are children just outside you know,” I shouted, folding my arms across my chest.

Sugar and Wrench flew apart. Sugar attempted to straighten her shirt and do up the front button on her jeans frantically while Wrench just stood and scowled at me.

“Don’t glare at me brother,” I told him, shaking my finger and trying my hardest not to laugh. “You’re the one doing something wrong.”

He adjusted his black cap—something he was never seen without—turning it so the cap shaded his face again. “We aren’t doing anything wrong.”

I laughed and shook my head.

“Please don’t tell him, Blizz,” Sugar pleaded silently.

I didn’t look at her but stared at my brother, who in return glared straight back at me. “The longer you sneak around, the harder it’s going to be to tell him.”

Wrench snorted before storming past me and out the door.

“He wants to tell Op. But I just can’t do it.” She leaned against the wall, pulling her fingers through her tangled hair.

“Making him keep it quiet means he’s lying to his president,” I warned her, hoping that those words would sink in.

She squeezed her eyes shut tightly and rubbed at her face, “I don’t want to be responsible for them being at each other’s throats. We both know Op is going to freak out when we tell him, and he’ll try to beat the shit out of Wrench. I don’t want that.”

It was true. Even though they weren’t together anymore, Op still felt he was Sugar’s protector. Even if that meant protecting her from one of his own brothers.

“But you’re okay with forcing him to lie and sneak around? He could get kicked out of the club for this, Sugar.” I kept my voice deep and low, trying my best to be stern without letting whoever was in the clubhouse know about this little…
development
. “Lying is a seriously punishable offense, especially lying about something that concerns Op’s family.”

“Punishable?” she questioned, her eyes popping open.

“Yeah, he could be barred… sent away… kicked out. This isn’t just some stupid love affair, Sugar. This could affect Wrench’s place in the club.” I shook my head. “Love him or leave him. If you love him, stand up and fight for it. If you don’t, stop fucking around and let it go. You’re playing with fire, and he’s the one who’s going to end up burnt. Not you.”

She pushed her back against the wall, and for a second I thought she might collapse. I couldn’t get involved in this shit. Op was my best friend and my president. Everything inside me screamed
tell him
but I knew this was a mess that they needed to sort out themselves.