My eyebrows flew up at that word, but Lucas quickly covered.
“Not that we’re betrothed,” he said. “I don’t even believe in marriage, so—”
“What?” I choked, as another wave of shock rang through my body.
“Aw, don’t go all female on me. It’s not a big deal.”
I made a face, crossing my arms over my chest. It was kind of a big deal.
“Listen,” he said firmly. “I don’t need to participate in some man-made institution to prove how much I love you. Wearing a tux and signing some dumb document that the government files away into a database doesn’t prove love. Actions do.” He took a deep breath, pulling my arms from around my chest and taking my hands again. “That’s why I’m gonna make a gesture. Like I said, it’s a tradition from when I was human. People don’t really do it anymore, but I never got to and I . . . well, I’ve always wanted to.” The smile on his face was almost bashful—something I’d never seen in Lucas before. This was obviously a big moment for him and I felt certain it would be for me as well.
“Okay,” I said cautiously. “What’s the gesture?”
Lucas reached into the pocket of his jacket and pulled out a square of thick argyle cloth. The pattern was faded almost beyond recognition and the edges were frayed, but it was unbelievably soft as he pressed it into my hand. “I know it probably seems silly to you—or weird. Or both. But back in my day, there were clans—like families. And each family had a specific pattern of cloth they wore, called a tartan. When two people wanted to get married, they exchanged a patch of their tartan with each other. It’s a symbol of unity—of love.” He squeezed my hands over the cloth. “I can’t imagine ever finding anyone in this time or any other who’s as perfect for me as you are. You’re a part of me. In ways I don’t even understand. You are truly my match. And for as long as I have you, I promise to be faithful. To love only you. And once you’re gone from this world, you’ll remain in my heart. Forever.” He brought my hands up to his, and kissed each one with a tenderness that made me want to cry. Then he released them and shrugged, seeming a little embarrassed. “I know it looks like just a dumb piece of fabric to you, but—”
“No,” I said, clutching the square to my chest. “No, I love it. Is it actually from your family’s . . . ?”
“Tartan,” he supplied. “And yeah, it is. I kept what I had left of it in a high-security bank vault in Washington. There are some other things in there ... things that hold particular value to me. I had this sent here.” He nodded at the square in my hands. “For you.”
I smiled at him, realizing that I was tearing up. They spilled over my cheeks, and I wiped them away daintily, lest I smudge my makeup. “Thank you. I wish I had something to give you back.”
“Nah,” he said waving me off as he stood. “It’s dumb anyway.”
I rose to my feet, too, catching his arm when he tried to turn away. “It’s perfect. Much better than some silly wedding.”
He searched me for signs of dishonesty, but I’d been truthful. I didn’t need a wedding gown or a ring or any of that ridiculousness. I needed Lucas. And that was exactly what he’d given me. I rose up onto my tiptoes and kissed him. “I never thought I’d be able to trust anyone like I trust you,” I said softly. “I’m sorry I don’t have anything material to give you, but I do have this: I have one life. A blink for someone like you, but it’s everything to me. And I give it to you. Fully.” I wrapped my arms around his neck, cuddling into his chest. “I think it was always yours.”
We were silent for a moment, arms wrapped closely around each other.
“Well, I’m wearing a white dress and you’re in a tux,” I said, jokingly. “And we just promised our lives to each other. So does this make us married?”
“Not legally, we’re not. But we are where it matters.” He brought my hand to his chest, and I felt the steady beat of his heart. “Right here,” he whispered, gathering me in his arms again.
He rested his head down on the top of mine, sighing. I let my walls come down completely, and felt his emotions enclose me in an effervescent beam of golden sunlight. They seemed to fuse with mine and form something new—something I’d never felt before. It was almost a connection, but different—less tangible. I clung to it, letting it sink down into my soul, illuminating everything it touched and become a part of me. My heart raced, my hands tingled, and he looked down at me.
“Do you feel that?” he asked.
I could only nod because my power had suddenly revved up without my control. It blasted through my body and into Lucas. I felt him jump.
“What’re you . . .”
“Hold on,” I said, calm despite what was happening. “Let me try something.”
Suddenly, it was as if I was Lucas. I could feel everything he felt, hear everything he was thinking—
what is she doing, this feels weird. . . . I can feel the change coming, she’d better hurry. . . .
Sure enough, I felt it, too. Some sort of dark, tangled thing deep down in the recesses of his mind began sprinting to the forefront. But I wouldn’t have this moment ruined with his curse—not if I could stop it. I shoved the darkness back, replacing it with the golden beam inside me. The beast shoved back, and I could hear Lucas’s confused thoughts, but I ignored him.
Stupid trigger. Go away!
I released another powerful beam, and the darkness inside him began to retreat. Lucas stopped resisting.
Holy hell . . . how did she . . .
I continued coaxing the beast away until there was absolutely nothing left. Nothing but Lucas and me—the way it was always supposed to be. Lucas’s emotions leveled out, and I sent him only warmth and love. There was no trace of the curse left inside him—no danger. Just Lucas. Human and perfect.
“That feels amazing,” he murmured. “It’s like I’m . . .”
“I know,” I whispered.
He looked down at me, his eyes the deepest, warmest brown I’d ever seen them. Human eyes. “How did you . . . ?”
I grinned, touching his cheek. “No clue.”
“Don’t stop.”
He kissed me. Instantly, the change began to surge again, but I quelled it, taking my time feeling his lips moving over mine.
Finally, the beast began gaining ground, and my strength failed—the curse came rushing back in an unstoppable wave of fury, and I only just managed to pull out of his head in time. I leaned back, gasping, but Lucas was smiling.
“It’s okay,” he said, rubbing my back absently. “I’m just me again. Guess it couldn’t last forever.”
“What did it feel like? To kiss me like that?”
He closed his eyes and pressed his lips together as he remembered. I heard him let out a small contented sigh. “Peace,” he whispered at last. He looked down at me, brushing his hand through my hair, and coming to rest at the nape of my neck. “Complete peace.”
I
returned to the reception not long after that. Lucas had gotten a call from Julian asking to see him—apparently he was having a minianxiety attack at the thought of what Melanie would be enduring in a few hours time. So Lucas went up to the mansion and I sat at my table alone, watching Derek and Katie dance to Michael Bublé as though they were doing an old-fashioned waltz—a very
bad
waltz. At the end of the song, Derek and Katie returned and collapsed at the table.
“That was ... interesting,” I said. “Really smooth.”
Katie giggled. “You’re such a dork,” she said to Derek.
He looked as if she’d just told him he’d won the Super Bowl.
Katie was about to say something else when one of the runts—a girl in her late teens with pretty blue eyes and a drop-dead sexy dress—came up to Derek. “Will you dance with me?” she asked shyly, an odd contrast to her appearance, since anyone wearing that dress couldn’t be as bashful as she was acting.
But Derek didn’t seem to notice anything but that dress and the body it (barely) clothed. He jumped up and swept her onto the dance floor, where he did a much more sophisticated version of his dancing with Katie.
I studied Katie as she watched Derek dance with the girl. Outwardly, she seemed fine with it, but the jilted, dejected feel in her vibe indicated that she was obviously upset, and I realized at once what was going on. Katie had a thing for Derek.
It should have made me jealous the way it had when he’d dated Courtney, but it only had the opposite effect. I thought it was great. Katie was awesome. Though, at the moment, I felt bad that she was being forced to watch Derek’s hand creep lower and lower down the girl’s back, and their bodies cling together in the slow dance.
“Come on,” I said to Katie.
“Huh?” She jerked out of her trance and looked at me.
“I’m hot in here. Let’s go outside.”
“Oh . . . okay.” She rose to her feet and shuffled slowly past the dance floor as if hoping Derek would notice she was leaving.
We went to the back porch of the mansion where Lucas and I had sat, and I leaned against the railing, watching the human guests continue to slowly make their way across the yard. Soon they would all be gone, and Melanie would be infected. Changed forever. I sighed. How much easier my life would be if I wanted it, too.
I sighed, looking down at my white-sequined dress and watched the moonlight play games with the sparkles. “Were you scared? When it happened to you?”
“Oh, hell yes,” Katie said, shooting me one of her toothy smiles. “Who wouldn’t be? It’s the unknown. There’s nothing more terrifying than that.”
“And was it worth it?”
“Yes.”
“You think I’m weak for not wanting it too, don’t you?”
“No. I think you’re smart not to get sucked in by the romance of it. Being with Lucas forever would be great, but not if you’re stuck being something you never wanted. Yeah, I love being a werewolf, but it’s hard. Really hard. The triggers, worrying about hurting innocent people—losing your mind. If you’re not ready for all that, if you’re not
absolutely sure
that’s what you want, you’ll spend eternity regretting it.”
I fingered my purse where the tartan Lucas had given me was stowed away, and wondered suddenly if he’d bury me with it.
I shivered. Too depressing.
“I know you like Derek,” I said, switching subjects abruptly.
Katie whirled to face me. “I—I don’t . . . it’s nothing, I just—”
“Chill. I’m not upset.”
Katie didn’t look so sure.
“No, really,” I said. “Derek and I are strictly friends now. And I just want him to be happy. If you make him happy—and I think you do, because I haven’t seen him smile like he does with you in months—then I’m okay with it.”
Katie flushed, but then she looked down at the railing between her hands. “He doesn’t like me back, though. I know he doesn’t.”
“Give him some time,” I encouraged. “What he and I went through ... it was sort of traumatic. But he’ll get past it eventually. And who knows? If you’re still interested, maybe it’ll work out.” I bumped her shoulder with mine. “Believe me, I’d rather you had him than Slut-dress in there.”
Katie giggled, but then shook her head.
“It’s stupid anyway,” she said. “He’s leaving and everything, so it’s not like it’ll work out.”
“What do you mean he’s leaving?”
Katie suddenly straightened, pressing her lips firmly together.
“Katie!” I exclaimed. “Tell me.”
She shook her head. “Lucas made me promise. I can’t believe I told. Oh, my gosh, he’s going to murder me.”
“Katie!” I grabbed her arm, trying to pull her back, but she darted away.
“I can’t, Faith. You have to go ask Lucas. I’m sorry.” She turned and practically ran into the house, slamming the door behind her.
I had to find out what was going on. Now. I turned and walked briskly back into the tent, where Derek sat at our table with Slut-dress, whispering playfully in her ear. I marched up to them.
“You,” I said, pointing at him. “Come with me. Now.”
“I’m busy, Faith.”
“No!” I all but screamed. “I mean it. It’s vital.”
He stood with a wistful glance at Slut-dress and followed me out of the tent, where it seemed the last of Melanie’s family had finally left and the pack was now preparing for the ceremony. I pulled Derek out of the way of the bustling werewolves and sequestered us in the shadows alongside the silken tent.