Blue Sacrifice (Blue Davison) (7 page)

“When will you join me?” Mom asked, crying on my
bed. “I’m lonely without you.”

“Why aren’t you with your mom?” I asked, thinking
of my grandmother who was long dead by the time I took my first breath.

“She hides from me. Everyone hides from me, but
you won’t. It’s so cold here, Blue. I need you to keep me warm.”

No matter how many times Mom showed herself and begged
for me to join her, I never built up a resistance. Sobbing now, I wished she
had been saved so we could have shared the last eight years. I wanted back every
day we lost because of Lily Falls, but those desires were foolish and would go
unanswered.

“I never wanted a child,” she said, curled on the
bed in a fetal position. “I didn’t want to sentence my daughter to die like I
would die. I tried to be careful, but I wasn’t careful enough.”

Staring at her, I didn’t know how to respond. I
couldn’t give her what she wanted yet. While I had promised her I would die, I
had also promised Flynn and Lacey I would survive at least the weekend. Mom had
to be patient, but I could see how cold she was as she shivered on the bed.

“Blue, when you jump and the water fills your
lungs, I’ll be waiting for you. You’ll be cold, but I’ll hold you in my arms
like I did when you were little. We’ll be together forever and we’ll keep the
cold away.”

Nodding, I forced my gaze away from her and looked
in the mirror where the demons awaited me. As I fixed my smeared makeup, I saw
the Jacoby twins staring hatefully at me. Sometimes the two boys would show
themselves the way they were when Assad finished with them, but usually they
were just angry. All of the demons were so full of hate and every day I postponed
sacrificing myself only increased their rage.

“Soon,” I whispered to them and Mom who trembled
next to me now. “I’ll jump on Monday.”

“Why not tomorrow?” Mom asked, her cold fingers
grazing my neck as she fixed my hair. “Why not do it when the boy isn’t looking?”

“I want to say goodbye to Aunt Penny.”

My mother flinched away from me. “If Penny had
died, I could have stayed with you longer and it would be my turn now. You
would have years more to live, but she failed. She had to be such a drama queen
and sacrifice herself in front of all those people.”

“I’m sorry, Mom,” I said, depressed now as I brushed
out my damp semi-wavy hair. “I’m sorry you’re cold and had to die so young. I’m
sorry, but I can’t do it until Monday. I need to put things in order.”

Angry at my answer, she walked into my closet and
disappeared. The faces in the mirror were angry too. Hurrying out of the
bedroom, I walked into the kitchen where Hans was cooking stew.

“You should stay in tonight,” he said.

“I have a date and I want to go out,” I muttered,
angry with everyone because my mom was cold and hiding in the closet. “Are you
going to stop me?”

“I’m not your father, Blue. I just worry about
you.”

Sighing, I looked at him and forced a tight smile.
“I guess I’m cranky like everyone else around here.”

“Go have fun then, but don’t stay out too late or
else Gretchen will worry.”

Glancing at Gretchen, who was sketching her
humping cats, I doubted she would even notice I left the house, let alone when
I returned. Hans would worry though. He wasn’t my father, but he was the
closest I was going to get.

“I’ll be careful.”

Smiling, Hans patted me gently on the shoulder. Every
year on the anniversary of my mom’s death, he would give me the best hugs and I’d
wonder if he was being inappropriate. Assuming the worst, I didn’t want to enjoy
those hugs, but Hans felt safe like the only grownup on the planet that really
cared if I lived or died. It felt good to have someone like him in my life.

Walking outside to wait for Flynn, I instead found
my mother on the porch, bloodied and crying for me to call someone to save her.
Why hadn’t I dialed faster? Didn’t I want her to live? Didn’t I care or was
I selfish like Aunt Rory who ran away from her destiny and forced her younger
sisters to die sooner?

By the time Flynn’s car arrived, I was miserable
from hearing my mother beg to live. She bled so much the porch was drenched,
but I left her anyway. I had tried years ago to save her, but it was too late. Crying
frantically, I hadn’t been able to control my shaking fingers and I missed the
buttons a few times before typing in Abby’s number. If I had kept my fingers
steady, maybe my mom would have survived?

Joining Flynn in the car, I said nothing. I didn’t
look at him either as my eyes filled with tears at the sounds of Mom begging me
to dial faster. She hadn’t begged the night she died, but she wailed now for me
to love her enough to save her.

“Glass half empty, my Blue?”

Shaking my head, I wiped my eyes. “Not half.
Completely empty with maybe a single drop of water left.”

Flynn took my hand then started driving. “This weekend
my father will be away. Our rental house is quite nice and it’ll be mine. You
should join me on Saturday evening after you’re done visiting your aunt. Join
me for the whole evening and get a break from your sad yellow house. Would you
like that?”

Finally turning to him, I smiled weakly. “I would
like that a lot, Flynn. I can’t tell you how much.”

He shared my smile. “I’ll cook for you. We’ll share
a fine meal and I’ll lavish you with attention.”

The way Flynn said the word attention made me
laugh. His mischievous grin was back and I felt better just looking at it.

“Thank you,” I said, squeezing his hand.

“You are very welcome, my sweet sad girl.”

“I’m not so sad now.”

“I still sense it around the edges. I’ll have to
keep you entertained tonight with tales of my many great adventures,” he said,
grinning slyly. “None were so grand as walking into a closet and ending up in a
fantastical land with god in the form of a lion, but I did get lost in a secret
garden once.”

Smiling easier now, I chose to enjoy his tales,
his lively company, the expensive dinner, and the wonderful kisses he gave me
in his car before walking me to my door.

When the demons hounded me later, I dressed in my
cashmere pajamas and pictured spending the night with Flynn. Shoving aside reality,
I let myself dream.

Walking into the Zandi house on Saturday morning,
I heard someone at the piano. Tyson was the one in the family most interested
in music. When I peeked around one of the house’s many arched doorways, I found
him playing rather casually at the white grand piano. His fingers moved lazily,
yet he made lovely music which filled the Mediterranean-style mansion. From my
spot at the doorway, I admired his profile and couldn’t help smiling.

Tyson was the first beautiful guy I ever met and I
still became flustered by his beauty. Like his sisters and parents and every
other Zandi, he possessed flawless olive skin, dark eyes and hair, and full
lips.

Recalling the night Tyson kissed me, I thought to
how tender his lips were while his gaze was full of passion. After the kiss, Tyson
had held me for another few minutes, watching me with those dark hungry eyes
then he gently released me and pretended as if he kissed all of his friends in
such a way.

While I was in his arms, I’d felt such promise for
a wonderful romance. Just as quickly, I was hurt by his rejection. I figured I
was too young for him or his parents wouldn’t approve of him slumming it with a
Davison girl. Whatever his reasons, no one should kiss like that then be able
to walk away.

Remembering his rejection, I entered the room feeling
more relaxed. His beauty still affected me, but I only smiled when he glanced in
my direction.

“Well if it isn’t Bluebell,” he said, using his
nickname for me while patting the bench where he sat. “Lacey is your chauffeur today,
I hear.”

“Yes, she and her power blue car are at my
disposal.”

Smiling with his sumptuous lips, he inhaled softly
then exhaled as if wanting to laugh.

“She is such a tomboy with that car,” Tyson
teased.

Grinning, I watched him tap away with one hand on
the piano. He wore a black sweater which rolled over his wide shoulders and
strong chest. His black jeans fell a bit long on his tall frame and just over
his bare feet. His dark hair looked damp and he smelled so clean I had an urge
to run my fingers over his skin.

“I almost forgot how beautifully you play,” I said
after regaining access to my brain.

Tyson nodded and his second hand joined the first
to create music, yet his mind wasn’t on the piano.

“Have you ever been to an opera?”

“No.”

“There’s a performance of Otella at the Riser Performance Center next week. It is a fine opera and I’m sure you’d enjoy it.”

“I’ll ask Gretchen for money so I can go.”

“Or you could accompany me? My sisters have no
patience for the arts and my mother has no patience for traveling in town after
dark.”

“It sounds fun.”

“You would go with me then?” he asked, watching me
with those dark eyes lined with thick lashes.

“Yes.”

Taking my hand and holding it to his clean-shaven
face, Tyson stared into my eyes with such a serious expression. “Promise you
will go with me next week.”

So mesmerized by his eyes and the music, I hadn’t
really understood his sudden need to take me to the opera. I thought Lacey might
have told him about Flynn and he was jealous, but that wasn’t like Tyson. He
knew I dated plenty of guys and he never seemed even a hint bothered by this
fact. No, he wasn’t claiming me, but saving me. If I was alive for the opera, I
would have survived longer than I intended. While I doubted Lacey told him
about my plans, he suspected nonetheless.

“Promise,” he whispered.

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Of course you can,” he said tenderly, my hand
still pressed against his cheek. “You just decide you want to see the opera and
you choose to see it. Many people live their whole lives without seeing Otella.
You shouldn’t be one of them.”

“My mother never saw it,” I said, teary-eyed
because I wanted to say yes so badly. “I can’t be sure I can go.”

“Please,” he whispered, his face pained. “Nothing
matters more than sharing one of my favorite operas with you. Give me this one
thing so I can die happy.”

Thinking of Tyson gone from the world, I instantly
knew I had to die, yet I said the words anyway. “I promise.”

Tyson smiled, believing my lie. He was a Zandi and
their blood tended to be spilt if a Davison wasn’t sacrificed. The family was
always warm towards me, even though I knew they were more aware than they let
on about the connection between Assad’s actions and Penny’s failed suicide.
They deserved to be safe, as did the rest of the Lily Falls inhabitants from
kooky Gretchen to the mean old man who threw rocks at kids who passed his
house. They were part of this place in a way I wasn’t. I just existed to
sacrifice myself to the town.

“It’s a lovely opera.”

Sensing he was having second thoughts over
trusting my promise, I asked, “What should I wear?”

“Anything will do. It’s about the music, not what
the audience wears. Show up in your pajamas if you wish.”

My body flushing with heat, I knew Tyson mentioned
pajamas just to remind me of the perfect evening we shared. There was no way
for him to know how much I loved those cashmere pjs, yet he must understand how
they were the nicest thing anyone ever bought me.

Despite Tyson’s beauty and my sometimes pathological
need for him, I had Flynn now. Pulling away my hand, I sighed quietly while
squirming a few inches away from him. Tyson’s relaxed expression shifted and I
sensed he was suspicious.

“What’s wrong, Bluebell?” he asked, using both
hands to play now.

“I met this guy and I just wonder if he’ll be okay
with me, you know, touching you and going to the opera and stuff?”

“We are friends and your possessive boyfriend will
need to accept how you are not his pet.”

My gaze met Tyson’s and I’d be damned if he wasn’t
jealous. While I shouldn’t have smiled, my mouth reacted quicker than my brain.

“Yes, you and I have been friends for a very long
time,” I said, still grinning despite my best efforts to stop.

Sensing I was teasing him, Tyson lifted a dark
brow and smirked. “You are no one’s possession.”

“I know.”

Nodding, Tyson stood in a smooth motion then took
my hand and guided me to my feet. When he stared into my eyes, I melted under
his gaze.

“This opera is beautiful,” he nearly whispered,
his voice heavy as his gaze owned mine. Moving closer, he ran his hands down my
shoulders to my forearms. “The most beautiful opera I’ve ever seen. It is delicate,
yet powerful. It is my most beloved thing in the world.”

My skin heated as Tyson stared at me and I
realized he wasn’t talking about the opera. Unsure how to respond because of
Flynn and my sacrifice and how Tyson once gave me the best kiss then walked
away as if it meant nothing, I just stood there.