Boo Hiss (20 page)

He paced the floor. “As you and I both know, this town is always on the brink of bankruptcy. We could use some financial incentive, and there seems to be a couple ready and willing to make it happen. On the other hand, we will most likely lose all our small-town values. I mean, you can’t be modern and still exist in a shell, as we’ve done. We’ve managed to keep our town away from all the madness of the world. But it was only a matter of time before they found us.”

“So either cease to exist or lose who we are.”

“I’m afraid those are our only two choices,” the mayor said. “But we’ve got to do something. Make some sort of decision. And soon.” Martin started to hand the mail back to the mayor, but he said, “No. You keep those.”

“Why?”

“Maybe you’ll get a sense of what we should do, after you read them all.”

“But sir, this is your town. You’re the one who should make the decision.”

“You’re as capable as anyone of knowing the pulse of the town.”

The pulse of the town, perhaps. The pulse of a woman, not so much.

Martin rose and stood in front of the mayor. “Sir, I know this snake thing has everyone’s nerves stirred, but I’m worried about you. You seem pretty anxious, and you’re not sleeping. You can’t sit down for more than five minutes. There is the stress of all the new things happening in town.
Maybe you should see a doctor.” It was the most diplomatic way of saying,
Last time there was a crisis, you lost your mind and thought you were in the Caribbean, so you can see why I might be concerned
.

“Martin, you worry too much. Now, I have to go. I need to get in my five-mile run.”

C
HAPTER
20

W
OLFE WIPED THE SWEAT OFF
his brow and drove carefully so as not to draw attention to himself. As Butch had explained, if you drive too fast, you’re going to get pulled over. But drive too slow and you look suspicious. Three over the speed limit, he’d instructed. Wolfe had rolled his eyes, but now he found his attention glued to the speedometer.

Butch had contacted him last night, about thirty minutes after Ainsley had gone to bed, using the phone rather than the closet. Wolfe didn’t ask, but he steeled himself for a conversation he knew he needed to have with Butch. It would be one of those conversations that starts off with the awkward line, “Don’t you think it’s time to stop fooling yourself and others with this charade?” He realized this was not going to be a popular view. Many Skary residents regarded Butch as a local war hero, but it was a shame they couldn’t see Butch for who he really was. And at Wolfe’s age, he just didn’t have the patience for it.

However, he could take care of that after they figured out what to do with the snake. Life was all about priorities, and right now, his number one priority was getting Melb back home. He had noticed that Ainsley didn’t cater to her as much this morning, but she also hadn’t had “the talk” with her by the time Wolfe left. Maybe she didn’t want Wolfe breathing down her neck about it.

Ainsley also looked more refreshed this morning. She had that youthful glow in her cheeks, and her eyes sparkled. It was a gigantic relief.

Wolfe checked his watch. Right on time.

“Whatever you do,” Butch had said, “don’t be late. Timing is critical for our operation. Gordon and Alda go out for one hour every morning to tend to their cattle. I’ve calculated the time it will take, including fear and apprehension, and one hour should be sufficient. But don’t be late! And for goodness sake, don’t be early, either.”

The perspiration had beaded and clustered on his forehead. He was running exactly on time. The farmhouse was ten minutes up the road, and he had eleven minutes to spare. He slowed down by two miles an hour, just to compensate. But not too slow. He didn’t want to appear “suspicious.”

“Don’t tell a soul,” Butch had warned. “Nobody can know about this. If they do, our cover will be blown, and you may risk having Melb and Oliver as permanent houseguests. Don’t tell Ainsley or my father or anyone you know. This has to stay between us. If Tarffeski gets wind of this, the snake’s gone and he’s pocketed a lot of money. This snake belongs to Dustin, and we’re getting it back to him and him alone.”

Wolfe had to admire Butch’s sense of justice. Wolfe would’ve just handed the snake over to the snake hunter and been on his way. Now he was on his way to breaking and entering, but at least it was for the sake of a heartbroken pet owner.

Butch’s final words had been, “And don’t bail on me, Wolfe. I need you there. I can’t do it alone. I’ll never forgive you if you don’t come help me. Plus, you’ll be driving the getaway car. I’ll find my way there by foot, but we’ll need something to haul this snake away in.”

Suddenly Wolfe’s Jeep lurched forward, made a horrible noise, lurched forward again, then lost acceleration. He pulled to the side of the country road, white steam spewing from underneath the hood. “No! No!” Wolfe scrambled out the door. He opened his hood, and a hissing sound filled the peaceful country side. “No!” He clawed at his hair and
took a few steps back. “Now what?” He could attempt to run, but he would be way too late. His shirt dampened with sweat. His first instinct was to pray, but he wasn’t entirely sure what he was on his way to do was going to be blessed by the Almighty in the first place.

Nevertheless, he was going to need a miracle.

Ainsley waited for Melb to return downstairs from her bath. Her anxiety over the impending conversation had caused her to juice eight glasses of carrots, but it gave her something to do with her hands. This was not going to be an easy conversation, yet as she’d fallen asleep last night, she knew Wolfe was right. She was enabling Melb. She’d done it unintentionally, but regardless, the damage had been done. In the deepest place in her heart, she’d wanted Melb to appreciate and love this baby. She couldn’t fathom how anybody wouldn’t want a baby. Sure, Melb was a little older, but this was a gift from God!”

Behind her, Melb galloped down the stairs. She had a cornflower blue towel wrapped around her head and smelled like she’d bathed in lotion. “Oh, that felt good!” she said, joining Ainsley in the kitchen. She stopped and stared at the carrot glasses.

“Those aren’t all for you.”

She patted her heart. “Thank goodness. I was hoping for a Pop-Tart.”

“I have your favorite pastry dish in the oven.”

“That’s what I smelled!” She grabbed Ainsley and hugged her. “You’re the best! Is it the one with cream cheese?”

“Yes. And blueberries.” It was a devious tactic, but Ainsley hoped it would help ease the pain of what she was about to say.

Melb sat down on a barstool. “I’ve been secretly wishing for it.”

Ainsley smiled and handed her a cup of decaf. “Melb, we need to talk.”

Melb looked up as she was about to sip. “Talk?”

“Yeah. I’ve got to confess some things.”

“Isn’t the reverend available?”

“Not sins. Well, not really sins. I’ve just been … been a little misguided, I guess you could say.”

“That sounds sad. Can I have more cream?” She handed the coffee back to Ainsley.

Ainsley added more cream and handed it back to her.

“And an ice cube. I don’t want to scorch my mouth.”

Ainsley took the cup and plopped an ice cube in it.

“You were saying?” Melb asked, blowing on the coffee.

“It kind of concerns how I’ve been treating you.”

“Oh, let’s not hash over that, Ainsley,” Melb said. “Sure you’ve been a little moody lately, and have said some things that coming out of your mouth have been nothing less than shocking, but we’re friends. And friends forgive one another. I mean, did I complain once when you forgot to feed me dessert after dinner? No. I simply dropped a few subtle hints, and that was it. If you ask me, I think you’ve been under too much stress lately. Maybe it’s because Wolfe doesn’t seem to know what work is anymore. I mean, if he’s not going to write, shouldn’t he be doing chores around the house or something? I’ll leave that between you two, but it’s just been a simple observation I’ve made while recovering from the unfortunate incident at the grocery store.” She sipped her coffee. “Okay, a little too sweet, but thanks for trying.”

Ainsley crossed her arms and lowered her tone. “I meant how I’ve been coddling you.”

“Coddling me?”

“I’ve been catering to your every need.”

“Well, if I’m not mistaken, that’s what you do for a living. Cater.”

“What I’m saying is that I haven’t helped you deal with any of this. I’ve been trying to protect you, I guess, from anything going wrong, or you feeling any more badly than you do about this baby. I guess I thought if I made your life comfortable and easy, you might decide that having a baby wasn’t so bad after all.”

Melb didn’t look happy. “What are you saying?”

“I’m saying that it’s time you took back your life, Melb. Get off the couch, start living again! You have a lot to do in the coming months. And I’ll help you along the way. We can think of a color and theme for your baby’s room. Go shopping for clothes. It can be fun!”

“Fun. Ainsley, by definition, middle-aged means that you’re incapable of bending down to pick up anything that is drooling. Especially twenty times a day.”

“You’re a strong woman. I know you can do this. You have a tiny baby depending on you. You have a husband who needs assurance that you’re going to be there for him, too.”

Melb’s eyes teared up. “I don’t even know where to begin.”

Ainsley tried not to let it distract her. “Begin by getting dressed every day, by planning for this baby. Pick out a boy name and a girl name. Make appointments at the hospital once a month, or at least have Dr. Hoover come over. Start deciding what you want to do with the baby’s room. You will have plenty to keep you busy.”

Melb was staring at the tile floor, but her eyes were sparkling with that determination Ainsley had seen when she was trying to lose all that weight before her wedding. Ainsley even noticed her hands had moved over her belly. “It’s real, isn’t it?” Melb whispered.

“Yeah! It’s real!”

Melb smiled a little. “It’s real. I’m going to have a baby. Oliver and I are going to have a baby!”

Ainsley embraced her. “What more joy could there be?”

“That pastry.”

Ainsley laughed with Melb and went to get the pastry out of the oven.

“You know what else, Ainsley?”

“What?”

“I’m going to move back home.”

“But what about the snake?”

“I’m a pregnant, middle-aged woman. Bring it on.”

Wolfe’s heart had never pounded so wildly in his chest. He was walking in circles, now wishing he’d signed up for that cell phone plan. What was he supposed to do?

Down the dusty road a large smoky cloud rose from the horizon. In its center was a vehicle, racing along the center of the road is if it didn’t expect to see another soul for miles. As it neared Wolfe, the dust settled, and Wolfe could tell it was a station wagon.

It pulled to the side of the road. The sun glared off the windshield, and he couldn’t tell who was in there. But soon the passenger door opened, and Oliver Stepaphanolopolis stepped out.

“Wolfe! What in the world are you doing out here?” Oliver sauntered up, looking at the raised hood on Wolfe’s Jeep. “Car trouble, huh?”

Wolfe nodded. Maybe he could catch a ride back into town with Oliver. But he knew there wasn’t enough time to get back to Gordon’s farm.

“I was just taking this fine station wagon out for a test drive. Where you headed?” Oliver asked. “You want a lift?”

Wolfe nodded but said, “No.”

“What are you going to do? Just sit out here and hope it starts?”

Wolfe dug his toe into the gravel.

“Are you okay?”

Glancing at the station wagon, he turned to Oliver. “Who’s driving?”

“That’s Sam Bavitt.”

“Doesn’t sound familiar.”

“He’s a lawyer from the next county over.”

Not from Skary? That was good. And a lawyer. Could come in handy.

“Ollie, you up for a little adventure?”

Oliver didn’t look like it. Both men checked their watches. Wolfe realized they could make it if they left now and sped all the way there.

“It’s top secret. What you hear stays between us and our lawyer.”

Oliver glanced back to the car. “I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

“Let’s just say, if this operation is successful, your life may get a lot easier.”