Boo Hiss (22 page)

Mike took the paper and looked it over. By the surprised look on his face, Alfred could only guess he was thoroughly impressed. Mike handed the paper to Neil. Neil, however, didn’t look surprised. He was frowning, and then looked to be suppressing a smile.

“A. W. Tozer. Oswald Chambers. Francis Schaeffer. Charles Spurgeon.” Neil glanced up, and his cheeks were turning a little red.

Alfred remained steady. They doubted him, but then again, they didn’t know how capable he was of doing the impossible.

“Alfred,” Neil said. “These men are dead.”

C
HAPTER
21

“T
HE SNAKE’S NOT MOVING
,” Butch reported for the fifth time. Wolfe was standing nearby, silently praying that God would look past his criminal activity and intervene by pushing that snake into the sack. But his prayers seemed to be bouncing off the thick concrete walls of the basement. “Were going to have to go in.”

“Go in where?”

“Go in, as in take control,” Butch said. He checked his watch. “We don’t have a lot of time to spare. You ready?”

“No I’m not ready!”

“Wolfe, we’ve already lost four minutes. We don’t have the time. Now come over here and help me pick it up.”

This guy was unbelievable! But Wolfe watched in awe as Butch moved the rest of the bags to fully expose the snake. “I’ll grab up here, you grab toward the back. You’ll have to try to anchor it, keep it steady. We’ll see how much Bob and Fred like to be picked up.” Butch stepped forward, clearly expecting Wolfe to follow.

Wolfe’s feet felt as heavy as feed sacks. He glanced back, and Oliver was on his stomach, his face peering through the window. He looked like he was about to be sick.

Of all the horror scenes he’d written, this topped everything. He hadn’t touched a snake since his middle school biology class. Bob and Fred, seeming to sense his fear, raised both heads and looked right at him. Behind him, Oliver gasped.

“Come on, Wolfe,” Butch said. “Lets go! Get a grip. They’re sensing you’re scared.”

Wolfe clenched his jaw and shuffled forward, because he couldn’t lift his feet.

“Move slowly, very slow movements,” Butch instructed. “I’ll grab the upper part of the body first, and when that is secured, then you take the back part.”

Wolfe moved into position. Nausea swirled in his stomach. Bob’s tongue was flicking. Fred just looked observant. Wolfe wiped the sweat off his upper lip, grimaced, and reached for the thick snake. Behind him, Oliver was making noises Wolfe wished he could, including girlish whimpers.

“Good,” Butch said. “Now, hold this position. I want to see what they do.”

Surprisingly, Bob and Fred just looked around, as if wondering why they were suddenly two feet off the ground. But neither looked to be an imminent threat. Butch looked back at Wolfe and smiled. Wolfe managed to smile back. He was conquering a fear. It felt good.

“Okay,” Butch said, after a moment, “let’s see if we can get them into the sack.”

“You think they’ll go willingly?”

“There’s a mouse in there, plus it’s dark and cool, so they’ll be drawn in.”

“Tell me what to do.”

“Just control the tail end. Keep it steady.” Butch stepped forward a bit, and said, “I’m trying not to look into those four eyes. That’s really freaking me out.”

Wolfe chuckled. Perhaps there was an element of normalcy in Butch after all.

“Holding the sack open,” Butch said, as if Wolfe couldn’t see for
himself what was going on. But he kept silent. “Sliding the heads in. There we go. Good boys. See, they like it.”

Wolfe couldn’t help but notice that it was that kind of innocently optimistic line that would always get one of his characters killed off.
See? Theres nothing to be afraid of.
And that would seal their doom.

But surprisingly, Bob and Fred went into the bag easily. Wolfe held the tail, then helped the snake on in. Once it was inside, Butch drew up the strings that closed the bag. Both men let out a huge sigh of relief. Butch stuck out his hand for Wolfe to shake and said, “Well done.” Pride swelled in Wolfe’s chest.

“Okay, let’s hoist this through the window and get out of here. Gordon and Alda could be back any minute. Help me put the feed sacks back.”

They stacked them, then Butch carried the sack with Bob and Fred over to the window. “You’re taller, so you’re going to have to hand this up to Oliver.”

“Me?” Oliver gasped. “I don’t think so.”

“It’s in the laundry sack, Oliver. He can’t bite you. And boa bites aren’t fatal anyway,” Butch said.

“However, Melb’s can be.” Wolfe smiled a little.

“Oh, all right. Hand it up.” Wolfe hoisted the bag up, and Oliver grabbed it and pulled it through the window.

“Wolfe, you’re going to have to help me up, and then move a box over, and we’ll pull you through.”

Wolfe lifted Butch by the foot, and he crawled through. Then Wolfe went to get a small box to give him the extra inches he needed. As he was pulling himself through the window, Butch said, “Hurry! I hear a car coming.”

Wolfe looked toward the gravel road but didn’t see anything. He scrambled through the window and got to his feet.

“Come on!” Butch said, and the three men raced toward the group of trees where Oliver had parked the station wagon. “Hurry, boys!”

As they were running, the snake juggling by Butch’s side, Wolfe was trying to decide how best to break the news to Butch about Sam. But then Butch stopped in his tracks, and Wolfe and Oliver did, too.

“What’s wrong?” Wolfe asked.

Butch turned back to the house. In the distance, a cloud of dust encircled a truck as it headed for the farmhouse. “The window. We forgot to close it.”

“Come on, we gotta go,” Wolfe urged.

“No. I have to go close it. I don’t want them to suspect anything.” Butch took a deep breath and handed the sack to Wolfe. “You go. Get the snake out of here. I’m going to go shut the window. I’ll meet you back at Oliver’s house.”

“How are you going to get back?”

“The same way I came, Wolfe. Now go.”

Wolfe and Oliver took off. Wolfe glanced back once to find Butch edging carefully toward the farmhouse. They finally reached the car, where Sam stood leaning against the door.

“Sam!” Oliver huffed. “Open the hatch! It’s the button conveniently located by the driver’s seat.”

The back door of the station wagon flipped open, and Wolfe put the snake in the back.

The three men, including Sam, stood catching their breath.

“I hope Butch will be okay,” Oliver said.

“He will be.” Wolfe looked at the car. “Who’s going to sit in the backseat … in front of the snake?”

Each man was shaking his head vigorously.

“I’m in front,” said Sam.

“Me too,” said Oliver.

“I’m not sitting anywhere near that snake,” said Wolfe.

Oliver smiled. “Well, luckily for us, this particular model of station wagon will fit three adult men comfortably up front. Plus everyone gets a cup holder.”

Melb folded the last of her clothes and closed her suitcase. It was going to be hard leaving this comfortable though warm house. If she didn’t know better, she might think she was living with a couple of reptiles, the way they had the heat cranked. But Ainsley was right. It was time for her to face reality.

And she was up for it. For the first time in weeks she felt energized, including a tingle of excitement for the baby. She was also starting to crave healthier foods, like chicken-fried steak instead of chocolate cake. So maybe there was something to Ainsley’s obsession with health food. Ainsley told her that if she listened carefully, her body would tell her exactly what it was needing. Right now it was french fries.

But she didn’t have the time. She had to get packed and get back to the house. She wanted to surprise Oliver. She knew he was missing home and that work had been hard on him lately. She intended to go home and prepare a big dinner. Carrying her suitcase, she walked downstairs.

But she was surprised to find Ainsley crying in the kitchen.

“Ainsley?” Melb touched her shoulder.

Ainsley jumped and then buried her face in her hands.

“Oh, honey, don’t cry We’re still going to see each other. Seriously. There’s going to be plenty of time for us.”

Ainsley rolled her face sideways to look at Melb. “That’s not why I’m crying.”

“Oh.”

Ainsley sat up and wiped the tears off her cheeks. “Melb, I’m feeling so inadequate. I’ve never had a self-esteem problem my whole life. Even when my mother died, Dad gave me so much attention and love that I’ve never doubted myself one day in my life. But now I wonder if I’ve just been fooling myself all these years.”

“How so?”

“I just always thought I was really good at what I do, you know? But now I’m seeing that maybe I’m not quite as good as I thought.”

“Honey, you’re the best cook I know.”

“But I’m talking about the complete package. Sure, I can cook. But can I cook with the proper makeup on?”

Melb was lost. And somewhat distracted by the pastry left on the table. She tried to focus back on Ainsley.

“Honey, I’m sorry, I’m not following.”

“There’s a new woman in town.”

Melb perked up. “A new woman?”

“You’ve been on bed rest, so you probably haven’t seen her. But she’s … she’s … “ “What?”

“Perfect.”

“How so?”

“In every way, Melb. Her hair, her makeup, her clothes, her son, her husband, her car. You should see how she carries herself. It’s confident but not snobby.” Ainsley sniffled. “Melb, have you ever met someone that you consider a better version of yourself?”

Melb thought for a moment. “I guess had I had a chance to meet her, Princess Di.”

“Right,” Ainsley sighed. She blotted her face and then offered a
smile. It was the same smile she plastered on her face right before she was about to offer a diced vegetable. “Listen, Melb, I’m really proud of you. I think that every day this baby is inside you, you’re going to grow to love him or her more and more.”

“I feel good,” Melb said. “I’m going to go home, clean up the house, and enter back into my world. It’s going to be hard, but if I hurry, I can make it back in time to see my soap!”

Ainsley laughed.

“Ainsley, listen, whoever this woman is, whatever she’s like, I can’t imagine her being more warm or kind than you are.” Melb reached out and squeezed her into a hug. “Keep your head high. I know one thing is for sure. She can’t make a pastry like you can. You’re the absolute best! Can I take the rest of this home?”

“Sure,” Ainsley smiled, and pulled out the tinfoil.

“I’ll load the car. Back home I go!”

Comfortably seat three grown men
was a bit of an overstatement. They sat shoulder to shoulder as Oliver drove back toward town. Sam sat in the middle, and Wolfe was on the outside.

“I’m sorry to take you away from work like this,” Wolfe said. “I know you’ve got that big car thing going on down there, and it’s probably a nightmare to leave.”

“I made it up. There is no big thing going on at the lot. I just couldn’t be around Melb anymore. She was driving me crazy. I thought I was literally going to go insane. I knew Melb was in good hands with Ainsley, so I gave myself a little break.”

“Are you and Melb okay?”

“You know how when you open the refrigerator, and you see a plastic bowl of leftover spaghetti and meatballs, you get all excited because it’s exactly what you were craving? You open it up, and to your surprise, it’s not spaghetti and meatballs, it’s chicken marinara. You love chicken marinara. It’s one of your favorites. But you thought you were getting spaghetti and meatballs, so you’re trying to adjust your taste buds for the new dish.”

Wolfe wasn’t sure he was following.