Boxed Set:Taming the Rocker - Vol. 1-5 (15 page)

My longing for her was even stronger than before. I knew without a doubt that I had to win her back or die trying. I was ready to tell my manager to fuck off.
Damn…what am I thinking?
I had to do something in order to help her and myself. From the looks of her, she needed some kind of help. I can do this. I knew what my mantra would be for the next few days.

I have to save her.

Lila

The next week was pretty bland. School took up a lot of time. It was definitely not going to be an easy semester. That was okay. Nothing was going to stop me from becoming a lawyer. I had worked too damn hard to get here.

As I continued, worry bubbled up in me more fiercely than ever. I did want to talk to Chase, but I wanted him to come to me first. That’s just how I rolled now. If I went to him, I thought he might take it wrong. I needed him to seek me out. After all, he was the one that fucked up. I simply couldn’t shake off what he did. Seeing him again had brought it all back up. I knew if I saw him again, that would be the first thing out of my mouth…accusations.

One day, I was on my way to class when I saw Alec. I could tell right away that he wanted to talk to me. Smiling warmly, he came over to me. I got excited. I didn’t know why I was so happy, but just seeing his face gave me the weirdest butterflies I had ever felt in my entire life. I didn’t know if it was because of our relationship or what, but I always felt like that when I saw him.

“Hey there, Alec,” I said aloud.

“Hey there. How are you, Babe?” he asked. 

He planted a kiss on my lips and I immediately blushed. Things were going so good. We didn’t have a whole lot, but I knew that initially it was a bit hard on him. He had wondered if I would go back to Chase at first. Obviously, that didn’t happen. I had told him I was done with Chase. I didn’t tell him that my insides got all shaky and curled up when I thought about Chase. I didn’t want to risk damaging what I had with Alec.

“Great. Yourself? Are you ready for the LSAT today?” I asked him back.

The LSAT was a big deal to get into law school. We had stayed almost every night studying and taking preparation courses. We did get a bit distracted, but we were able to get past that and still get work done. We were good about shit like that.

“I’m doing well. I’m as ready for that test as I’m ever going to be.”

I giggled and nodded. The damn thing was stressful and I was very worried about it. This test could make or break me.

“Great! Are you heading over now?”

“In about a minute or so. I have to ask you something though before you run off. I don’t want to have to attempt to find you when everyone is leaving the lecture hall,” he replied.

My eyebrows rose and I shot him a curious look. He just gave me a cute little smile.

“What is it?”

“I just wanted to see if you were free Friday night. I have something important to tell you,” he said.

I wondered what it was, but I shook the thought off. I didn’t know what to think, but I had to keep focused on the quiz. I nodded and we separated. I walked away wondering what that
something important
was. As I approached the building housing the lecture hall, my eyes widened.

Chase was sitting in front of the door to the lecture hall. He was wearing a disguise, but I knew him right away. He looked at me with determination. I walked over and couldn’t help thinking
not now
.

Chase

I needed to see her again. I had to get a second chance to talk this over. She spotted me and, even with my shades, baseball hat pulled low, and my hair in a ponytail, she headed straight towards me.

“What the hell are you doing here? Why are you stalking me at school now? Didn’t you get the hint the first time?”

“I wanted to talk to you during the daytime. You seemed to be a bit tired the other night. I could tell that there was a lot on your mind. Can we talk about this, Lila? We really need to. I know I hurt you. It will help to talk about it.”

I could tell that she was fuming when I said that. I didn’t care. I knew she wouldn’t scream at me with all her fellow classmates walking around us. I had to see if she cared. By the looks of her anger, she still did. I could also tell that she was definitely curious. I was excited to finally get her attention.

“Now is no good. I’m getting ready to take an important test. Besides, I just finished talking to Alec. I don’t want to talk to you in front of him.”

I looked around and saw a tall stick-up-his ass guy shooting daggers at me with his gaze. I immediately knew that was Alec. There was
no holy shit, there’s a rock star air
about him. He was pissed that I was talking to Lila and hated me.
What did she tell you about me?

If I wasn’t trying to get Lila back, I might have fucked with him. He looked like a little pussy. I knew without a doubt that I would take him down in a fight any day. I suddenly wished that he could see my death glare through my shades.

“Who’s that? Your new boyfriend?”

It hurt to think that she had moved on so quickly while I was still trying to recover. How the fuck do women do that?

“What if it is? It’s really none of your business. You couldn’t do anything about it anyway. We’re through, Chase. Why can’t you understand that?”

“Lila, why don’t you listen to me? I wanted to explain to you what happened and apologize for what I did wrong. I know that I fucked up. I just want a second chance,” I hated my pleading tone. Damn it!

“You should’ve thought a bit harder and not like an idiot before you cheated on me. I don’t have to listen to you at all, Chase, and I don’t want to. Goodbye and good riddance.” she said.

“I didn’t…” I trailed off when she spun around and walked away again.

Students milled around me, looking at me, and talking about me like I was some sideshow experiment. They had probably had never seen such awesome drama before this.

“Get the fuck away from me,” I told them in a low voice. The kids started to back away. None of them seemed to recognize me. Frankly, I could have cared less if they did or what they thought about me.

I headed down the sidewalk away from the front of the building. It was useless.
We’ll never be able to work this out.

I swear I almost felt my heart break all over again. I didn’t want to cause her any trouble. She seemed like she didn’t care anymore. A well of emotion almost dropped me on the sidewalk. I needed a fucking drink. No, I stopped a week ago and knew I wasn’t going down that road again.

What the fuck am I going do? Shit, Lila, can’t you tell that I love you and that love is driving me insane?
The realization that she no longer gave a shit literally made me dizzy. I ducked into the park and wiped tears off my face. Taking deep breaths, I placed my hands on my knees and fought a wave of nausea.

So much for that. 

Lila

Why did he follow me here?

I mean, seriously…am I not clear!? Shit! I have to pass this test. And now, he’s flooding my thoughts. Oh God…Alec saw us talking. What is he thinking now?

I told myself over and over again, like a mantra, I’m not interested in Chase. Alec knows that. Why can’t Chase understand that?

I don’t get it. I mean, if I was rejected as many times as he was, I would’ve just stopped trying. Just go back to that bitch Ava and your groupie sluts. Why is he so desperate to get me back?
Probably some sleazy bet.
Stop thinking about it and concentrate on the test.

I sat in the classroom and tried not to think about it. Yet that was not happening. I replayed everything that transpired between us over and over again. It had been so damn hard to reject him.
Damn it! I don’t have time for this.

I knew that he definitely wasn’t going to stop unless I let him down hard. When I saw the pleading look on his face, I wanted to give in and set up a time to talk. That pouty face almost made me want to take back every bad thought about him. 

I no longer care about Chase. Take the fucking test. I have Alec now. Fuck you, Chase.

What the hell had Alec meant
by something important?
He better not break up with me. He has been a bit distant lately.
What the hell is happening?
For the last week, Alec and I hadn’t been as close as before. I couldn’t shake off the feeling that things were going to go to shit if I didn’t do something fast. What the hell can I do?
Damn it…focus on the test!

I was so stressed that I thought I was going to blow this LSAT. My father would kill me. If Alec bails on me, I’ll be alone again for a while. So be it. I grew to love alone-time before. I can love it again.

Redoubling my efforts, I was finally able to concentrate on the test. I shoved all the bullshit out of my head and thought about studying with Alec the night before. It worked. But the underlying feeling that change was about to swallow me alive never left me. I didn’t know if it would be for the worse or better, but I had to find a bright side of things and hang on tightly.

Lila

Friday night finally arrived. I had worried over what he might have to say. I thought things were going well between us. He came to pick me up at the usual time and told me we were having dinner in a very special place. I found out it was at a penthouse-dining club in one of the most expensive hotels in the area. By now, I had convinced myself that it was something bad. This was not what I expected to say the least.

The club was very pretty. The minute I walked in, I was completely and utterly mesmerized by the décor and the way the music around the room wafted and filled my senses. It was all consuming, but I knew that there was something else hidden behind this man’s intentions.
Has he decided to change colleges and now he’s buttering me up for the bad news? My father would definitely do that.

We went up to the top floor and took a seat at a reserved table. It was nice and very quiet. We were alone at the corner table with a view of the lakefront. I drank the champagne and arched an eyebrow at Alec’s warm smile.
I know you have some bad news. Just tell me already.

“Are you okay, Honey?” I asked.

“I’m okay, Babe. I couldn’t wait to get you alone these last few days. When we’re at school, everything’s hectic. Do you like the champagne?” He tipped his glass as he spoke.

I nodded and smiled at the server who placed a plate in front of me. We quietly ate, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was hiding something. The food was exquisite. I grew more nervous with each bite.

Beautiful out tonight, isn’t’ it?” he asked.

I glanced toward the lakefront and smiled. “Yes, Alec, it is.”

I put my silverware down. I couldn’t stand it any longer. This quiet dinner and his mysterious vibe were bugging the shit out of me.

“Now why are we here tonight? You’re hiding something.”

Alec smiled and scooted his chair away from the table.
Where is he going? And why isn’t he answering me?
My eyes widened when he dropped to one knee and presented me with an open box. The light twinkled off the ring inside.
Oh, shit! This is why he wanted a private corner.

“What!?” I gasped.

I had no other words than this. My mind dumped all information and I just stared at the sparking stone like the world’s biggest dumbass. I couldn’t even seem to close my mouth.

“Lila, I know that we’ve only been together for a short while. You’re beautiful and bright. I love you in ways that you’ve never been loved before and I’ll take care of you like no one else will. I’ve wanted to ask you this for a while, but finally worked up the nerve. We can stay engaged for a while. We don’t have to marry until after graduation if you don't want to. Will you marry me, Lila?”

I bit my lip and thought
holy shit!
Take care of me like no other!? Is this about seeing me with Chase? Chase…I can’t marry Alec without settling this crap with Chase once and for all. And my father would never approve of me getting engaged in college…even to Alec. Or did my father put him up to this?

I was so confused. I knew one thing for certain; I couldn’t say yes.

“Alec, I’m sorry, but I can’t. I do love you, but I don’t think I’m ready for this. We’ve only been dating for a little over a month. I mean, getting engaged is a huge step.”

He snapped the lid shut on the ring and rose with a fake smile. I winced and opened my mouth, but didn’t say anything. What more could I say? I tried to imagine Alec and I engaged or married. I couldn’t. I didn’t even know if I wanted marriage. I knew my father was hell-bent on us getting together but it had to be organic. I refused to marry Alec because someone else, including him, wanted me to or for whatever reason.

Chase’s face popped in my head and hung there.

Alec’s mood immediately changed. I hoped he understood. “It’s alright, Lila. I wouldn’t dream of pushing you into something that won’t make you happy.”