Break Away (13 page)

“Not until you’re twenty-one,” I replied seriously, ignoring Olivia’s eye-roll. “In fact, I’m not sure this movie is appropriate. Those shells she’s wearing don’t leave much to the imagination.”

“Did you just admit to checking out a children’s cartoon character?” Olivia asked quietly, peering at me in amusement from the other end of the couch.

“Um, it’s hard not to notice,” I whispered back. “And while I do appreciate a nice rack, I think that Ariel should be wearing a tasteful one-piece, or maybe a wet suit. This is supposed to be a children’s movie!”

Olivia burst out laughing, shaking her head at me. “You’re ridiculous.”

Halfway through the movie, Olivia and Sadie both fell asleep, cuddled up together on the couch in a way that couldn’t possibly be comfortable. Moving carefully so I wouldn’t wake them, I picked Sadie up and carried her into her bedroom, tucking her into bed and placing a kiss on her forehead.

I stood over Olivia and tried to decide whether or not to wake her so she could sleep comfortably in the guest room. I felt bad waking her up, so I cautiously reached underneath her and cradled her small frame in my arms, lifting her up and carrying her into the other bedroom.

Laying her down on the bed, I wondered briefly if I should change her clothes before thinking better of it. I covered her up with the blankets and brushed my hand along her smooth cheek, taking a brief moment to enjoy how perfectly peaceful she looked as she slept. I stood to leave and she grabbed my hand.

“Stay,” she muttered sleepily.

I stood frozen in place, debating with myself about whether or not I should do it. There was a good chance I would have a nightmare, and I wasn’t ready for Olivia to experience that or for the questions that would go along with it. On the other hand, I didn’t want to pass up the chance to sleep next to her. As stupid as my cravings for her were, I couldn’t fight them.

Sighing, I moved to the other side of the bed and pulled my shirt off before climbing into the bed and lying next to her. She automatically curled into my side, resting her head on my shoulder and draping her arm over my stomach. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, breathing in the coconut smell of her shampoo. My skin burned from her soft touch and ached with the tickle of her warm breath. Being this close to her was perfect and comfortable and confusing. I wouldn’t let myself worry about what might happen tomorrow or if it would change things between us. I wanted to enjoy it while it lasted.

I avoided sleep for as long as I could, and when I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer, I drifted off to sleep, hoping that no nightmares would find me.

***

The first thing I noticed when I woke up in the morning was the temperature. It was warm. Much warmer than usual.

During the night, I had managed to completely wrap myself around Dex—my head nestled in the nook of his shoulder, my hand splayed across the bare ridges of his stomach, and my leg hitched over his. Mortified, I started to untangle my limbs from his but froze when Dex stirred briefly, his arm tightening around me and pulling me closer.

His touch caused something inside of me to stir, spreading warmth throughout my body, and for a moment I let myself snuggle into him, enjoying the safety and comfort he provided. It had been a really long time since I’d felt that. I considered staying in bed and going back to sleep, but that would mean dealing with the inevitable awkwardness of waking up together. Staying would only blur the lines between us even more, and I wasn’t ready to face him just yet.

I’d been having a weak moment when I asked him to stay with me last night, yielding to my deep-seated desire for closeness. It didn’t help that I’d cuddled with him. I don’t know what I’d been thinking, and I really hoped that Dex wouldn’t give me a hard time about it. I wanted to blame it on the fact that I was used to sleeping next to someone, and it was simply an automatic reaction, but the truth was I hadn’t been a cuddly sleeper with Steven. I normally preferred having my space, but being near Dex had a strange effect on me. I found myself gravitating toward him whenever he was around.

I wasn’t in denial; I knew that I was attracted to him. I mean, who wouldn’t be? But I also knew that I couldn’t go there. A simple physical attraction, no matter how strong, was not enough to offset the countless reasons why it was a terrible idea. Unfortunately, it seemed that my body hadn’t yet received the memo about us being just friends.

Once I was able to unravel myself from Dex’s warmth, I carefully climbed out of bed and went into the kitchen to make some coffee. While it brewed, I sifted through the shelves and pulled out the various ingredients to make pancakes. Sadie woke up a few minutes later and joined me in the kitchen, eager to help out so we could surprise “Uncle Dee” with breakfast.

As we were setting the table and putting the finishing touches on breakfast, a sleepy-looking Dex emerged from the bedroom. He wore jeans with bare feet and was pulling a shirt over his head to cover up his naked torso. My cheeks flamed when he looked at me, and I quickly turned away to pour the coffee, avoiding his eyes.

“What’s all this?” Dex said, gesturing to the heaping plates of pancakes, eggs and bacon that were spread out on the table.

“We made breakfast!” Sadie grabbed his hand and pulled him over.

“Wow, you sure did,” he replied, sitting down at the table next to her. “It looks delicious.”

Once we had devoured the breakfast and nothing was left—thanks to Dex’s enormous appetite—I started clearing the table while Sadie relocated to the couch to watch her morning cartoons. As I went into the kitchen to begin cleaning up, Dex came up behind me, and I knew I couldn’t avoid him any longer.

“I’m really sorry about last night,” I blurted out clumsily. “I swear I didn’t mean to get all cuddly like that, I think it was just an automatic reaction to sleeping next to someone… I couldn’t help it and I really hope I didn’t make things too awkward…”

Dex chuckled. “It’s no big deal, Liv. Really. It was actually the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a long time. You’re more than welcome to cuddle with me anytime.” He flashed me his trademark cocky smile and waggled his eyebrows provocatively, immediately putting me at ease.

I smacked his arm playfully, grateful to him for letting it go without a fuss. From now on I would be more careful, even when I was half asleep.

By noon, the temperature was approaching ninety degrees, and we were desperate for a way to cool off. Since the beach was likely to be swarmed with other people all looking to avoid the heat, Dex suggested that we go to the swimming hole on his parents’ property. We would have it entirely to ourselves, and it was better for Sadie because there weren’t any waves or currents to worry about.

I’d never seen anything quite like it. It was tucked away in the woods, completely obscured by the surrounding trees. Our own peaceful, private oasis. When Dex mentioned a swimming hole, I’d automatically pictured a small muddy pond, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. It was fairly large and the water was clear, cool and refreshing. It was deep in the middle, but with shallows along the shore and a sandy bank where we could spread out our towels and sit down.

Dex carried Sadie on his broad shoulders, taking her into the deeper water where she could jump off his shoulders and swim the short distance over to me. Her cheerful giggles and excitement were contagious, leaving us all with matching megawatt smiles by the time we went back to the shore for a break.

I sat on my towel watching Sadie splash happily in the shallow water while Dex disappeared into the trees. A few minutes later, I heard him yell loudly and observed as he swung from a rope that was attached to a large tree branch, letting go of it at the last second and dropping into the water.

His head popped up a few seconds later, confident grin in place as he strode out of the water to where I was standing.

“Wanna try it, Liv?”

I gave it about a half second’s thought before shaking my head. “No, thanks, I think I’d rather keep my feet on solid ground.” Mainly because I was scared of heights.

“Oh, come on!” He held out his hand out to me. “You’ll love it, I promise. I’ll go even go with you, and you know I’ll keep you safe.”

His words resonated inside me, making me feel protected and cared for. His brown eyes were pleading for me to trust him, bursting with something so caring and genuine that I was defenseless against them.

“Okay,” I said, grabbing his hand and pulling myself up. “Let’s do this.”

After making sure that Sadie was playing safely on the shore, Dex led me to a tree at the edge of the water and gave me a boost onto the first branch, following close behind and showing me where to go.

“You better not look at my ass,” I warned.

“Can’t make any promises.”

We got to the small platform and Dex grabbed a hold of the rope, gripping it tightly above where it was knotted before motioning for me to climb onto his back.

“You’re kidding me, right?” I glanced at the hard ground below us that would surely cause at least a few broken bones if we landed there instead of in the water. “What if you can’t hold me and we fall before we’re supposed to?”

“Don’t be ridiculous, Liv. You weigh like a hundred and fifteen pounds soaking wet. Of course I can hold you.” He took my hand and pulled me forward. “Now quit being a chicken shit and hop on.”

I did as I was told, wrapping my arms and legs around his back so tightly that I was surprised he could still breathe. Even through the fear, my body responded to the feeling of our nearly-naked bodies pressing tightly together, and warmth flooded through me.

“You ready?” he said, craning his neck around to see me.

“Now or never,” I nodded, clinging even more firmly against him.

I kept my eyes off the ground and focused on Dex as he drew the rope back and then launched off the platform. We were in the air for less than a second before he released his grip and we plunged into the water with a splash.

It was a total rush. There was something liberating about those seconds of free fall before hitting the surface of the water and cascading beneath it. As pitiful as it sounds, I’d never felt anything like that before because I rarely felt secure enough to drift out of my comfort zone. But Dex… he made me feel safe.

I came up from the water with a huge smile on my face. “Let’s do that again.”

Dex took me on the rope swing at least a half dozen more times before we finally called it a day. It was nearly time for dinner when we finally piled back into the car and made the short drive to Dex’s parent’s house. It was their weekly family dinner, and they had invited me along. As nervous as I was to meet them, I was eager see what they were like. They were such a close family, and that was an entirely new concept to me. I’d been close with my mom, of course, but it had only ever been the two of us. I’d never experienced the big, happy family that Dex and Amy seemed to have.

As soon as I walked through the door, the Porters—who insisted that I call them Paul and Emily—greeted me excitedly and made me feel welcome. They were warm and genuine, and I envied the fact that Dex and Amy had grown up in a family with so much love for each other. It was all I’d ever wanted. I hoped that they realized how lucky they were to have that. As I watched them joke around with each other and banter back and forth, I found myself wondering what my life would have been like if my dad had stuck around. Would we have been happy like they were, or would we only have been more miserable?