Breathless (148 page)

I spent the rest of my day searching for my classes. The building was small enough that I could figure out where I was going most of the time, and if I couldn’t, there was always someone around to ask.

Each time I walked into a class, the teacher would give me a disapproving look as soon as he or she saw me, but I didn’t really care. They could think whatever they wanted to about me as long as they would give me the grades I worked for. If they didn’t, then we would have a problem.

I was worn out by the time the final bell rang, but I was looking forward to working my shift at the tattoo shop. Rick had been working on a back piece for a guy, and today was his final session. I couldn’t wait to see the end results. So far, it looked sick.

I threw my books into my locker and walked out to my car, happy that I was free. I threw my bag in the backseat, and then I slid into my car. I was trying to hurry so that I could get to the shop in time to see Rick finish the session, but when I turned the key in the ignition, the only sound I heard was a click.

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” I groaned as I hit the steering wheel.

Today was really not my day. I tried a few more times before finally accepting that I was going to have to call Andy and see if he could come pick me up. I pulled my cell phone from my pocket, and I nearly threw it out the window when I realized it was dead.
What good is the stupid thing if I can’t use it when I need it the most?

I hung my head in defeat as I realized that I was stuck. I was either going to have to walk across town or ask someone here to use a phone. Both options sucked in my opinion.

Three-Emma

Why is it that on the only night this week when I don’t have cheer practice, Jesse is sitting in his obviously broken-down car parked next to me?

I’d been standing on the stairs, watching him fight with his car and then his phone for the last few minutes. I was still mad about what I’d heard him say at lunch, and I didn’t want to help him. I wanted to let him sit in his hot car and turn into a puddle.
Okay, maybe I don’t want that, but still.
He obviously didn’t think very much of me.
So, why do I feel like I should help him?
I
should
just get in my car and drive away, but I knew that I couldn’t. He needed help, and I was going to offer it to him.

I took a deep breath and walked over to his Jeep. “Need some help?” I asked him through the open window.

He nearly jumped through the roof before he looked me over carefully.

“My car won’t start. Can I use your phone?”

I pulled it from my pocket and held it out to him. “Sure, go for it.”

“Thank you.” He dialed a number and waited. “Andy, it’s Jesse. Listen, I’m broke down at school. Can you come get me?” His face fell as he listened to his friend talk. “No, it’s fine. I’ll figure something out. Thanks.”

He hung up the phone and handed it back to me without a word. He was obviously still in need of help even if he didn’t want to admit it.

“Did you get a ride?” I asked, pretending that I didn’t already know the answer.

He shook his head. “No, he has to take his mom to the doctor, and my mom is working right now. I’ll just have to wait until one of them is free.” “Where do you need to go?” I asked.

He glanced up. “I was supposed to be at work in ten minutes. I don’t see that happening now.”

I motioned to my car. “Get in. I’ll take you.” I wasn’t sure what I was doing, but I’d already offered, and I couldn’t take it back now.

“You don’t have to. I’ll figure something out,” he said stubbornly.

“Oh, for God’s sake, get in my damn car, and I’ll take you where you need to go. Not all of us rich bitches are heartless, you know.” The words had come out of my mouth before I had a chance to think them over, and I instantly regretted them.

He didn’t say a word as he climbed out of his car and slipped into mine. Instead of making me feel better, the fact that he hadn’t commented made me nervous. I walked around to the driver’s side and got in, careful not to look at him.

“Where do you need to go?” I asked. “Rick’s Tattoos over on
my
side of town.” “You tattoo?” I asked.

I backed out of my parking spot and pulled onto the main road. I had no idea where Rick’s was, but I knew where the lower-class part of town was. He could just give me directions when we got closer.

“Nah. I’m only seventeen, so I can’t legally. I just work there as the shop bitch.”

Again, I couldn’t help but admire him for saying exactly what was on his mind. “Do you like it?”

“I do. Rick and his guys are great, and I’ve learned a lot from being there.”

“That’s great. I’m glad that you found something you love.” The seconds ticked by slowly as we both stayed silent.

“I hurt you, didn’t I?” he asked suddenly, destroying the silence.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I replied, hoping that he would believe me.

The truth was that he
had
hurt me. I wasn’t sure why, but the fact that he had labeled me a stuck-up bitch bothered me. Sure, I could be one if I wanted to, but that wasn’t usually the case.

“Don’t lie to me,” he said as he stared at me.

“I’m not lying to you,” I said stubbornly

“Yes, you are. I can see it in your eyes.”

I had no idea how he could be in my head like this. There was just something about him that made me care about what he thought of me. I’d lived my entire life not caring what others thought, yet here he was, pushing his way into my life without even trying. I couldn’t deal with this.

“What gives you the right to ask that?”

“I don’t have that right, but I want to know. I didn’t mean to hurt you, and if I did, I really am sorry. I grouped you in when I shouldn’t have. You’ve been nothing but nice since I got here this morning.”

I glanced back and forth between him and the road, unsure of what to say. “Yeah, it did hurt a little.”

He turned away from me. “I knew it did, and I’m sorry. Sometimes, I speak before I think. Listen, I don’t want to start out like this. Can we start over?”

“Does it really matter that much to you?” I asked.

“Yeah, I guess it does. I’m just not sure why,” he said as he turned to face me.

“Well, I’m willing to ignore this afternoon if you are. You could use a friend since you’re so antisocial, and I’m willing to be that friend if you let me.”

He grinned. It was the first one I’d seen since he’d gotten in the car.

“I am
not
antisocial.”

“Yes, you are. You completely ignored Todd in class today.”

“I did not ignore him. I nodded when he said hi.”

“That doesn’t count. You’re supposed to be sociable, you know, as in, like, talking to someone,” I said as I grinned back at him. “Whatever. Maybe I prefer not to be around people.” “Why would you say that?” I asked, confused.

“Because people are assholes. I learned long ago that the only person I can trust is myself.”

For someone so young, he was definitely jaded. I had no idea what had happened to him previously, but it was obvious that he didn’t care about others or what they thought of him. Someone had hurt him, and for some reason, I cared.

“Not everyone is an asshole. Some of us still care.”

“If there’s anyone out there that cares, I’ve yet to meet them, besides my mom. It’s just her and me against the world. Fuck everybody else.”

He had just given me a bit of information about himself without even realizing it. I smiled as I glanced over at him.

“You’re close to your mom, I take it?”

He nodded. “Yeah, my mom is the only one I have left. It’s been me and her for years, and I like it that way.” “Where’s your dad?” I asked.

“No clue. I can barely remember him. The bastard left us when I was little.”

“That sucks. My dad travels a lot, but at least I still get to see him. If not,

I might go crazy without him.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Why is that?”

“My mom and I don’t get along. She’s too busy planning committee events to be a mom.”

“You said before your parents are divorced. Where is your dad?”

“He’s in a band, so he travels a lot. It’s been like this my entire life, so I’m used to it. I just wish he was home more to help me deal with her.” “Make a left here,” he said, effectively ending our discussion.

I gave my signal and turned left at the light. We were in the slums of the city, and I was glad that my car had automatic locks. I had no idea how Jesse could stand to work here. I would be afraid of getting mugged. Although, since he was a pretty big guy, that probably wasn’t a problem for him.

A few buildings down from the turn off, there was an old brick building with a sign out front that said
Rick’s Tattoos
. It was weathered and broken down on the outside, but the inside looked brightly lit. I pulled into the parking lot and shut the car off.

“Well, this is me. Thanks for the ride,” Jesse said as he opened the door to get out.

“Wait!” I yelled.

He turned back to me. “What?”

“So, we’re starting over tomorrow? Clean slate?”

He smiled, and my stomach flipped as I saw the dimple in his cheek.

“Yeah, we can start over. Maybe next time, I won’t be such an ass.”

I laughed. “Something tells me you’re good at being an ass.”

“That, I am. Have a nice night, Emma.” “You, too!” I called as he walked away.

I waited until he went inside the building before I finally pulled out. There was just something about this boy that kept me intrigued, and I was determined to find out what it was, mother be damned.

***

The house was quiet as I closed the door behind me. I had to admit that the peace was kind of nice. I knew as soon as my mom came home, there would be never-ending chatter about her meetings, and I just didn’t have it in me to listen tonight.

I walked up to my room and threw my bag on the bed. I didn’t have any homework tonight since I’d finished it at school, so I fell down on my bed and stared up at the ceiling.

Today had been interesting to say the least. Jesse had come out of nowhere and completely thrown me off balance. I needed to pull myself together. I didn’t get nervous over boys. They got nervous over me—with the exception of Todd, but every girl in the school got nervous when he was around.

I should be focusing on Todd, not Jesse. Todd was safe. Todd was someone who my mother wouldn’t commit murder over if she found out we were together. He was who I was supposed to be with. Or, at least, I should be with someone like him, not a guy like Jesse. He was too poor, too common.

So, why am I staring up at my ceiling, thinking about him?
I wondered. I needed to get a grip and control my hormones. That was all this was. Jesse was attractive, and I couldn’t help but notice that. I was a hormonal almost eighteen-year-old. There was no other excuse for it. I couldn’t be crushing on the poor boy, no matter how attractive he was.

I groaned as my phone started ringing. I pulled it from my pocket to see that it was Lucy calling. “Hello?”

“I saw you leaving school with the new guy. Start talking.”

“There’s nothing to say. His car broke down, so I gave him a ride to work. That was it.”

“You didn’t bang him in the back of your car?” she asked, sounding disappointed.

“No, I didn’t bang him. Sorry to disappoint,” I said sarcastically.

“A girl can hope. What happened when you drove him to work?”

“Nothing. We talked, and I dropped him off.”

“You’re seriously crushing my dreams right now. I was picturing him naked.”

“We were both fully clothed.”
Unfortunately.

“Well, that just sucks. Maybe next time…” she hinted.

“I’m not interested in him like that.”

“Are you a lesbian?”

My mouth dropped open. “What? No!”

“Then, you’re interested in him. I’m pretty sure every girl at our school is interested in him. Everywhere I went today, all I heard was people talking about the new kid.”

“There are other new kids though, so maybe it wasn’t all about him,” I said.

“I saw the other new kids. Trust me, they were talking about Jesse.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, oh. But I have to say that he didn’t even glance at anyone all day, except for you. I think he has a thing for you, too. You could totally snag him if you wanted to.”

“I don’t want to snag him,” I lied. “I want Todd. Did you see him talking to me today?”

“Todd is nice, but he’s no Jesse, and yes, I saw. He’s definitely into you, too.”

“I hope so. Todd is just what I need.”

“I don’t care who you
need
. It’s who you
want
that matters. So, do you want Todd or Jesse?” Lucy asked.

“I want Todd,” I answered automatically.

Even I knew it was a lie, but I couldn’t help it. There was no way that I could get involved with Jesse. My mother would make my life a living hell.

“Whatever. I’m going to go. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Later.” I ended the call and threw my phone onto the nightstand.

I definitely want Todd…maybe.

That lesbian option was starting to look pretty good.

***

When I pulled into the parking lot the next morning, Jesse was under the hood of his car with some guy I’d never seen before. I parked a couple of spaces down from them and got out. Jesse was oblivious to my presence as he tinkered with the engine.

“I’m telling you, it’s the starter. The engine is fine,” the unknown guy said.

“It can’t be the starter,” Jesse argued.

“Why not?”

“Because I can’t afford a fucking starter right now. I just cut back on hours at the shop for school.”

My heart went out to him. He was trying so hard, trying to work as much as possible and go to school, and he couldn’t even afford a part for his car.

“Listen to me. I know cars, and you don’t. It’s the starter. Talk to Rick.

Maybe he can pay you early or something.”

“I’m not asking him to do that for me. I’ll figure something out,” Jesse snapped.

I cleared my throat to let them know that I was standing behind them. Jesse tensed before glancing over his shoulder. He seemed to relax when he noticed me.