By Force of Instinct (42 page)

Authors: Abigail Reynolds

elizabeth could not help but laugh. “That was hardly the case, my love.

I had been flattered by his preference for my company, but when his interest changed to another I realized that my heart had not been touched, or I should have cared far more. I never cried over
him
.”

“I knew that later—while I was certain you did not care for me, I knew enough of your honesty to know that you could not have kissed me as you did if your heart belonged to another man. As I said, it was a consolation of sorts.”

she kissed him affectionately and nestled in closer to him. “Well, I do not know what I
was
crying about, but it certainly was not him! But wait—was it that sunday, after church?”

He nibbled her ear. “yes, you minx, I believe it was.”

“I was crying, my foolish love, because you had looked at me so coldly in church, and my entire life seemed so hopeless.”

“truly?” he asked, sounding quite surprised. “I had no idea. If I had, you may be sure that I would have been at your side trying to kiss your tears away, and we might have saved ourselves a great deal of time and discomfort. And I was only angry with you in church because after all that we had said to each other, the moment I saw you again, you still had as much power over me as ever.”

“Well, I am not sure I would have been quite ready for
that
—it took me longer than that to come to my senses. I had a long way to travel to reach an understanding of you,” said elizabeth comfortably.

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By FoRce oF InstInct

“And I was bewitched with you, but had not the least understanding of your heart, so perhaps it is as wel it happened as it did,” he said. “There is a poem of Wordsworth’s, in fact, that always reminds me of that.” He quoted,
She was a Phantom of delight

When first she gleamed upon my sight;

A lovely Apparition, sent

To be a moment’s ornament;

Her eyes as stars of Twilight fair;

Like Twilight’s, too, her dusky hair;

But all things else about her drawn

From May-time and the cheerful Dawn;

A dancing Shape, an Image gay,

To haunt, to startle, and way-lay.

I saw her upon nearer view,

A Spirit, yet a Woman too!

Her household motions light and free,

And steps of virgin-liberty;

A countenance in which did meet

Sweet records, promises as sweet;

A Creature not too bright or good

For human nature’s daily food;

For transient sorrows, simple wiles,

Praise, blame, love, kisses, tears, and smiles.

And now I see with eye serene

The very pulse of the machine;

A Being breathing thoughtful breath,

A Travel er between life and death;

The reason firm, the temperate wil ,

Endurance, foresight, strength, and skil ;
A perfect Woman, nobly planned,

To warn, to comfort, and command;

And yet a Spirit stil , and bright

With something of angelic light.

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Abigail Reynolds

elizabeth rested her head back on his shoulder. she had grown accustomed in the past months to her husband’s penchant for memorizing and quoting verse, which never failed to enchant her, especially when it showed he had been thinking of her.

“That is how I was, then—you were a mere phantom of delight; it was not until later, when we were engaged, that I saw the woman within,” he said.

“And now I know that you are a perfect woman—but you do bewitch me still.” He cupped her chin in his hand, and caught her lips with his in a kiss of deepest passion. she was breathless by the time he released her mouth, only to trail his lips seductively down her neck. His hand began to caress her breast, a delight he had only rediscovered recently after some weeks of deprivation when her condition had made them too painful to touch.

elizabeth moaned softly. Darcy had only grown more skilful with time at arousing her. Before he had the opportunity to cloud her mind further, she said playfully, “Do you remember when we were engaged, the day you came to Longbourn for the first time?”

Darcy, who was less interested in talking than kissing by this point, murmured between kisses, “of course.”

“Do you recall that you asked me to take you to a secluded place, and you said that there were ways we could … go farther, but that I had not the experience to tolerate them?”

Darcy discovered that the conversation held more interest for him than he had initially thought. “I recall it vividly, my heart,” he said, his voice warm. “It was quite a sacrifice, but well worth it for your sake.”

she kissed him tantalizingly, running her hand under his coat. “I was thinking, I am a
great
deal more experienced now.”

“so you are, my dearest,” he said admiringly. “so you are.”

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THE PEMBERLEY VARIATIONS by Abigail Reynolds is a series of novels exploring the roads not taken in Pride & Prejudice. The main characters and occasional lines of text are the original creations of Jane Austen.

 Impulse & Initiative 

 Without Reserve 

 The Last Man in the World 

 From Lambton to Longbourn 

 By Force of Instinct 