Read Caught in the Devil's Sheets Online
Authors: Jesse Johnson
STOP!
My subconscious cuts my thought in half! I clear my throat, then start my car and head to the bank. I place Odin’s note in my safety deposit box. I’m not quite willing to part ways with it just yet, but I can’t risk it ever being found. While I am out, I check my PO Box without getting my hopes up. As usual, there is nothing from Billy. I’m a lot less disappointed then I usually am. I think I have gotten more than enough gratification from Odin’s letter.
When I get home, I serve up chili and biscuits to Erica and the kids. Jaime still isn’t back. I know one thing. If I do leave Jaime, I won’t miss being kept in the dark! I know that Jaime’s role in the club is messy and I’m better off not knowing all the details, but it’s hard to trust a man who’s out late and closed to discussion.
I remember the first time Jaime came home unexpectedly late. We had just got married, but were still living in his beach condo. I had stayed up till 1am, and he still wasn’t home. I finally took myself to bed. I awoke around 3:30 in the morning to the sound of his bike pulling in. It was the first time that he’d stayed out all night without calling. I went downstairs to meet him, sure that something was wrong. He was filthy and he had dried blood all over his face that wasn’t his. More suspiciously, he was wearing a black hoodie and no cut. Devil’s Bandits never ride without their cut. It’s what defines them.
“I need a bag,” he said, stopping on the doormat just inside the door. I handed him a trash bag from the kitchen and he proceeded to strip all of his clothes off and place them in the bag. Growing up Italian, I’d seen more than enough mafia movies to know exactly what was going on. He’d either killed someone or helped bury them.
“Want me to get rid of that?” I asked, trying to fit the role of the perfect gangster’s wife.
“I was gonna take it down to the beach and light it up after I shower. Care to join me?” Other than being dirty, Jaime looked completely unfazed.
“Sure. I’ll put some beers in a bag,” I said.
Jaime gave me a big kiss on the lips before heading up to the shower. I put a few beers into a picnic basket, along with a box of crackers. Then I stood there in the kitchen, staring down the black trash bag sitting up against the door. I was confused as to why I was so turned on. I felt like I had married the world’s biggest badass! I trusted that the blood Jaime was currently washing down the drain didn’t come from anyone who didn’t deserve it.
Jaime finally made his way downstairs and we headed down to the dark and empty beach. Past the dunes, Jaime burned each piece of clothing including the plastic bag itself, mixing the ashes into the sand.
“I love you. Can I trust you not to tell anyone about tonight?” Jaime asked, smiling down at me and holding my hand. He knew the answer to that already. This was the life I’d signed up for.
“Only if you promise to fuck me tonight!” I said, biting my lip and turning to hug him.
He held up his end, and I held up mine.
We’re back to court the next morning. Erica has the kids and doesn’t get to come with us. The jury is ready to make its ruling. We all sit on pins and needles as the verdict is read. My heart sinks low into my stomach as Jaime is found guilty of assault with intent to do bodily harm, as well as felony possession of cocaine.
The judge sets a sentencing date of May 18
th
, which is sooner than James thought. Since Jaime is charged with assault, he has to await sentencing in jail. However, James is able to buy Jaime until Sunday morning to get his affairs in order before he turns himself in.
This is it, the moment we knew was coming. Jaime’s face is ghostly, but he’s too proud to admit that jail could shake him. He won’t be the only Bandit in jail and he’ll have the club’s affiliates to keep him safe. That is unless word of him and Sergio’s deal gets out. Then they could use their affiliates to hurt Jaime. I feel myself get pale.
We’re both quiet as we leave the courthouse. The second we get home, Jaime retreats into the garage to snort blow. After the day he’s had, I can’t see arguing about it. Instead, I make dinner. The family sits down for a quiet, and rather depressing meal.
As I lie in bed awake, next to a snoring Jaime, I contemplate what to say to Odin. I’m not sure if Micah has agreed not to rat on Jaime. To be honest, it would surprise me if he kept the information to himself. Micah and Jaime ride in the same club, but they don’t play on the same team. I’d think Micah would jump at the chance to hurt Jaime.
I don’t know what Odin wants me to say to Jaime. Can I tell him everything? Is there more? What’s the deal they’re offering Jaime for divorcing me quietly? What are the chances of them burying the information if I don’t leave him?
I pick up my phone and text Odin {can we talk?}- Lila.
In a matter of seconds my phone lights up and is buzzing.
Incoming call, Odin
. I sneak out of bed and head out to my car, where I can talk in private.
“Hello.”
“Sup?”
“I didn’t think you’d call right now! It’s one in the morning.”
“You said you wanted to talk.”
That I did. “I just have some questions—”
“Ask away.”
“What am I supposed to
tell
Jaime exactly? I know that you are selling coke to the Kings through Sergio, and if you divorce me civilly, I won’t tell?” I could never actually say that. Jaime would fly off the handle if I threatened him like that. What kind of bitch blackmails her husband?
“You could say that if you want to.”
Odin almost sounds amused, like he has no grasp on how serious this is.
“What do you think I should say?” I’m curious to get his take.
“Nothing. I think you should pack your bags tonight, and let me break it to him in the morning.”
He must be joking.
“What if I’m not ready to leave?”
Odin lets out a long sigh
“I think the better question is, why would you stay? I know he hits you, Lila. I know he makes you feel like you’re trapped. I understand if you’re scared, but you don’t need to be. Jaime is constantly putting you in the line of fire, letting you run, ripping off the Kings, and leaving you alone. How can you not want out?”
“Jaime was a different person before he started using all the time. I just have this hope that if he gets sober, things will change. It’s not as easy as just leaving Jaime either. I’d have to leave the club too. I don’t want to do that. The club is my family. I’m sick of running every time things don’t work out.”
“The club is going to eat you alive, Delilah,”
Odin says.
He’s probably right.
“Being alone will kill me a lot faster. I don’t want to lose my community.” I feel terrible admitting my biggest reason for staying is the club.
“Even if Jaime could change, could you really forgive him for everything?”
“I don’t know. Even sober I don’t know if we could fix things. Nothing says he won’t start using the day they kick him loose. I know I’m getting tired of running. It’s a means to no end if I stay, but I don’t know what to do. Even if he gives me everything we own, I can’t keep it. I can’t stay here. Everything he could give me wouldn’t make up for the friends I’ll lose.”
“Lila, if they’re only your friends cause your with Jaime, then they’re not really your friends.”
In a way he’s right, but that’s not how the club works. “I just need time,” I say in a small voice.
“How much time?”
“How much can you buy me?”
“This isn’t a game!”
Odin snaps angrily, and I jump. He’s never snapped at me before.
“I know! Jaime has to turn himself in Sunday and await sentencing. I think we can both agree that if I’m going to tell him anything, it’s best to wait till he’s properly contained,” I say as if Jaime is a caged animal. I hate to regard him that way, but I know too well what he is capable of when he’s high.
“Agreed. You shouldn’t tell him yourself unless he’s well-confined. He goes in Sunday, then what?”
Jeez!
What does he want me to do, write out an exact itinerary? “That depends. What did Micah say?”
“Let me worry about Micah.”
What does that mean? “If I’m going to blackmail Jaime, I need to know I have your word he’s not going to get ratted on anyways. Otherwise, I need to tell him before he goes to jail. It’s not fair to send him to the wolves like that.” There’s a long moment of silence.
“If you’re going to stay with him regardless, there’s really no point in me asking Micah for any favors. I’m only asking for you. Micah wants Jaime’s head on a stick. He could lose his patch for this.”
I know this, but it’s still hard to hear. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For caring about me enough to go out of your way. I don’t think I’ll ever get used to you caring for no reason, but I’m glad you do.”
“
Who says I don’t have a reason?”
“
So you are just trying to get in my pants,” I tease.
“
Oh, I’m after a lot more than just that!”
Odin sounds like the big bad wolf, luring me into his snare. There are another few moments of silence, but Odin makes no gesture toward wanting to hang up.
“When are we taking off again?” I ask him, changing the subject.
“Thursday. I’ll pick you up.”
“Till Thursday then?”
“Only if you’re sure you don’t wanna pack your bags now.”
“Time, Odin. I need time. Time to figure out what I want and what I need. Time to come up with some sort of plan for what to do next. Time to make a whole new group of friends,” I joke, although it’s true.
“The club won’t out you Lila. I’m sure at this point most people are shocked you haven’t left already.”
I’m not the only wife in the club married to a man like Jaime. Being a lady in this club is not for the weak-minded. I don’t like Jaime when his anger is directed at me, not one bit, but it’d be a dead lie to say I’m ready to give up my lifestyle. I love being married to a badass. I love having money and treating the world like it’s my oyster.
“Sure,” I say, unconvinced myself.
“I’ll still be your friend,”
he offers.
It’s a sweet gesture, but I know what kind of friendship he’s proposing. “Will you pick my nose?”
“What?”
he asks, laughing at my random question.
“Well, you can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but only a true friend will pick your nose for you.”
Billy told me this once, sticking out his nose to see if I would dare. Of course I did, and then I sat still enough to let him push a finger into my nose.
“Yes, Lila, I will pick your nose.”
It’s stupid, but I feel so much better. “Thank you,” I say again, glad that someone is willing to talk me through my shit, even at 1:30 in the morning.
“Anything for a friend.”
“I should go.”
“You should.”
“No, you hang up!” I mock, in an annoying voice.
“Goodnight, Lila.”
I linger a moment, not wanting to hang up the phone. “Goodnight, Odin,” I say, before finally hitting the end button. I sit in my passenger seat contemplating our conversation and his letter. But before I’m able to draw any conclusions, exhaustion hits me. I head back inside to my room and the clock says its 2:15am. Jaime is still fast asleep. My purple suitcase is leaning up against the closet.
Pack it and go?
Desire nudges me with an elbow.
If only
, Reason sighs, as I climb into bed.
Sunday morning, it’s finally time to say goodbye to Jaime. I bring him to the jail and we sit in the parking lot, killing his last 10 minutes. I act as though I have every intention of waiting for him. We kiss one last time, and I watch as he gets out of my car, and turns himself over to the law. I have no idea how to feel as I head for home.
Rick, Angela, and Erica are all there, and I already don’t feel welcome as I pull up. Erica is in tears over Jaime and Angela is sitting on the couch sharing a box of tissues with her. It’s scary because no one knows how much time Jaime will get or what this will mean for him. None of us will have answers until he goes back for sentencing. Rick is playing with his grandkids in the backyard when I go out to smoke a bowl. He doesn’t mention the little chat we had when Jaime was in the hospital, and I’m glad. I’m not feeling as brave today.
“What are your plans for the time Jaime’s gone?” Rick asks me, as if Jaime just left for war.
“I don’t know. We have a lot we need to talk about,” I tell him.
“Thought you woulda done that the last few days.” Ricks voice is hoarse from all the cigarettes he smokes, and he takes a seat in the swing, lighting one up.
I stay standing. There’s really not much I have to say to Rick.
“He ever tell you what’s going on between him and Sergio?” Rick’s question catches me off-guard, but I’m quick not to show it in my face. Rick knows something.
“I told you, he said it was a misunderstanding. What about you? Did you ask him?” I say, pointing my finger at him.
“Told me the same thing,” Rick says.
I don’t believe him anymore than I believe Jaime.
“You didn’t mention it to anyone else. Right?” It’s hard to tell if Rick is asking, or warning.
“No, I didn’t tell anyone,” I lie.
If Rick knew I told Odin, I’d be in a lot of trouble right now. I realize that if Micah says anything, it’s all going to bounce back on me. My heart races as Rick stares at me. It’s like he’s waiting for me to crack.
“Rick, I love Jaime. We have a lot of things we need to work out, but I do love him. I would never do anything to hurt him.” Deceit. My mother said my father was an excellent liar. Times like these, I’m glad to have inherited his trait.
“I know,” Rick says smiling, and he pats me on the back.
I’ve convinced him, but I’ll be watching my back for Rick and Sergio. I stand up to leave, but as I turn my back Rick stalls me.
“Oh, uh, I wanted to talk to you about something else,” he says, and I’m forced to turn and face him again. “Thank you for taking care of Erica,” he says surprising me.
“Of course, she’s family.” I smile.
I take a deep breath and seriously contemplate packing my suitcase and going to my mother’s with my tail tucked between my legs. But I’m too proud to go there and admit that things with my bad boy husband didn’t work out.
Before Rick leaves, he asks me to walk him out. I have a feeling he’s going to give me more trouble about Odin, and he does.
“I really think you should reconsider working with Odin. I know Jaime thought it was a good idea, but Jaime doesn’t always have the best judgment.”
No shit
. “What do you have against Odin?” I ask directly.
Rick looks like he wants to tell me something, but doesn’t know how.
“I have some things I think you should take a look at. I’ll drop them by next time I’m here,” he says.
I roll my eyes. Of course he can’t just tell me! Rick puts his helmet on and takes off on his bike.
I come home late Wednesday after spending some time at Kelli and Cody’s house. There’s manila envelope from Rick on the porch.
Thought you might find these an interesting read.
I’d like them back when you are done, no hurry.
-Rick
Looks like a bunch of newspaper clippings. I don’t have time to look through them now. I need to get some sleep before I spend the whole day driving. My bed is lonely, especially because I know Jaime won’t be strolling in later. It takes me hours to fall asleep.