Change of Heart (7 page)

“Not really.”

“Bed, it is.”

“Well that's not very original.”

“Always busting my balls,” I muttered, spinning her around and pressing her up against the wall. “That foreplay to you?”

“If it is, we've been practically fucking for the last ten years—”

I laughed against her mouth as I leaned in, and within seconds, she was laughing with me, wrapping her arms around my neck as she hopped up. I grabbed her bare ass in my hands and groaned, finding the smallest piece of underwear known to man nestled between her cheeks.

I stomped toward the stairs as she rubbed her lips against mine, and thank fuck I didn't have a ton of furniture and knew my way around in the dark or we would have fallen ass-over-elbows as she ground her pussy against my stomach.

I stumbled slightly as she sucked my neck between her teeth, and I had to brace myself against the wall as I moved up the stairs. Jesus. I couldn't remember ever wanting anyone the way I wanted her—and that was so fucked up I couldn't even wrap my head around it.

I felt drunk, and I'd had only one sip of the beer she'd ordered me at the bar before she finished it off.

I dropped her on my bed as soon as we entered my room, and as soon as she hit the sheets, my mind remembered the last time I was in bed with her.

I completely froze. “Oh, fuck,” I hissed, looking at her in horror.

“What?” She hopped off the bed like it was on fire, looking frantically around the room.

“No. No,” I stuttered. “Are you okay? I didn't hurt you, did I?”

How could I have forgotten? Shit, she'd just had surgery, and I was throwing her around and slamming her into walls, and, oh fuck. I'd pressed her belly up against the bar.

“I'm fine,” she said in exasperation, falling stiff as a board straight back onto the bed. “All healed up.”

“Are you sure? Shit!”

“Yes, I'm sure. I think I'd know.”

“Well maybe—”

“Maybe what? I was just so overcome with your good looks and
charming
personality that I was willing to overlook any discomfort or pain in order to get one more look at your ginormous cock?” she cut in sarcastically, pulling her tank top over her head as she said it.

“You're such an asshole,” I mumbled, staring at her perfect tits. “Why the fuck do I even like you?”

“Aw, you like me? Tomorrow can we make daisy chains to wear in our hair and paint each other's toenails?”

“For some reason, your mouth is moving but I can't hear anything past the sight of your nipples.”

“That doesn't even make any sense,” she replied as I tore my shirt off and ripped open the front of my jeans.

“Made perfect sense to me.”

“Okay, well…,” she murmured as she turned over and pressed her chest to the bed, pulling her knees up until her ass was perched high in the air. “Does this help? Can you hear me now?”

I wanted to fall to my knees and fucking worship her. Instead, I tripped, cursing while I pulled the rest of my clothes off, and she giggled.

I leaned forward and bit her ass.

“Oh, shit,” she moaned, her back arching even closer to the bed.

“You just keep talking,” I said against her skin, sliding my fingers up until I could grab the thin strings at her hips and slide them down over her ass, snapping them once against the smooth skin there. “Giving me so much shit all the fucking time.” I pulled the underwear down to her knees and gently helped her raise her legs so I could take them off. “But when I get you like this, it all goes away, doesn't it?”

“Yes,” she said breathily as I smoothed my hand down her back.

“You'd do whatever I wanted—”

“I wouldn't go that far—” Her words cut off on a sharply indrawn breath as I bit her ass again, this time a little harder.

“You smell good,” I murmured, pulling her thighs farther apart.

I licked my lips as I stared at the pretty, dark-pink skin between her legs, then noticed a small hand inching down over her clit.

“Nice try,” I laughed, reaching under her to grab her wrist before her hand made any good contact.

Then I opened my mouth and ran my tongue from her clit to the small opening that was already weeping for me.

Ani yelled out my name as I pressed my tongue inside her, and I felt like fucking Superman.

My dick was so hard it hurt. Hell, it felt like I'd had an erection the entire night, from the moment she'd taken off her pants in the truck. Ani's hips started rolling against my face, her legs trembling, and I pulled back fast before she could come.

I wanted in there before she did.

“I fucking hate you,” she moaned against my comforter when I wiped my face and got to my feet.

I chuckled as she toppled to the side, looking up at me through dazed eyes.

“You're gorgeous,” I said quietly, bracing my hands on the bed so I could lean down and kiss her hip. “Come here.”

I pulled her to her knees on the bed and brought her face to mine. Why the hell did I want her so bad?

As soon as her mouth met mine, I groaned. Sliding my tongue into her mouth, I grabbed her ass in both hands, jerking her against my body. It had been a month since I'd felt all that smooth skin, and I wasn't even sure where to start.

Falling onto the bed, I pulled Ani with me. When her legs had settled on each side of me, she pulled away from my mouth, leaning back until she was straddling my hips.

“Ride me,” I ordered hoarsely.

“Condom?” she asked, reaching down to wrap her hand around my dick.

I almost shot off the bed it felt so fucking good.

“I'm clean,” I told her, searching her eyes.

Maybe I was a dick. Insensitive, or whatever. But for the entire ride home, I'd been really conscious of the fact that there was no way to get Ani pregnant. I could fuck her any way I wanted to, come inside her at any time, and there was no way for my worst nightmare to happen.

I didn't have to worry about a broken condom or faulty birth control. It was like Christmas.

“So am I but…” She looked off to the side for a moment, squeezing her lips together. “Okay, yeah.”

“Yeah?”

She didn't answer me again with words, but instead, pulled my cock away from my belly and ran it through the wet lips of her pussy. She kept doing it, rubbing it back and forth for a long time.

“Sorry,” she laughed humorlessly, and shook her head. “I'm nervous all of a sudden.” Her cheeks grew pink as she tried to play it off, but I could see how uncomfortable she was by the tilt of her head and the way her jaw clenched.

I knew her. I knew all of her tics, most of her expressions.

“Hey,” I called quietly, sitting up so our faces were close. “That's why you're on top.” I reached up and gently pushed her hair away from the sides of her face. “Go at your own pace; it hurts—we stop.”

“This is stupid,” she replied, notching my dick at her opening and barely pressing me inside. “The doctor said I'm healed.”

“Then stop fucking around,” I said shortly.

“You're such a dick,” she gasped, pressing down harder against me.

“I'm thirty-two years old. I stopped dry humping when I was seventeen—” My entire body jerked as she suddenly forced herself down. “Oh, fuuuck.”

I'd known that pissing her off would get her out of her head, but I hadn't realized how little it would take to make her forget her fear.

“It feels different without a condom,” she whispered into my ear, running her hands into the back of my hair and fisting it tightly as she rolled her hips.

“No shit,” I gasped out. “Fuck, that's good.”

“It doesn't feel
different
?” she asked hesitantly. The word came out tentatively, and I knew she didn't mean
different
—she meant
bad
. Why she'd ever think that, I had no clue. But it was so far from the truth it was laughable.

Her words hit me hard. I don't know if it was the vulnerability that normally she would have killed to keep hidden or the fact that she'd trusted me with it, but in that moment, I felt more tenderness for her than I'd ever felt in my entire life.

“Better,” I whispered, kissing her jaw. “It's better.”

She pulled back to look in my eyes, then didn't look away as she lifted up and slid back down. I caught her smile as my eyes drifted closed and my head tilted toward the ceiling.

A sexy woman was fucking me raw, tight as hell and wet as fuck, and there was no way I could get her pregnant. It may have been the best moment of my life.

“Best moment of my life.”

“Jesus, it doesn't take much, does it?” Ani laughed.

“Did I say that out loud?”

“Sure did.”

I pulled her hands from my hair and fell back on the bed, my hands rising to grip her waist. She was so slender that I felt like I could wrap my fingers all the way around her if I tried. I'd have to come back to that later.

“Go,” I ordered, lifting her up and dropping her back down. “Stop fucking around and do it.”

Ani smiled and fell forward, sucking my bottom lip into her mouth, pulling on it as she leaned back again.

Then she braced her hands on my chest and ground down hard. Within minutes, she was bouncing above me, and one of her hands had slid down her torso to press against her clit. Every time she rose up, I could feel the tips of her fingers against my dick, rubbing and pressing.

She came first, thank God. But I was right behind her.

S
o, sex without a condom meant a very messy cleanup and a wet spot on the bed. Good to know.

“Shower with me?” Bram asked as he pulled me up off his bed.

“What happened to postcoital cuddling?” I asked when he didn't wait for my answer and tugged me into the bathroom. “Is that not a thing anymore?”

“It's a thing,” he answered as he turned on the shower. “But I have a beard.”

I tilted my head to the side as I waited for him to continue, but that was all he said.

“And?” I finally asked as we climbed into the shower.

“And it smells like your pussy,” he said, his lips pulling up in a satisfied grin. “I like it.”

“Then why are you washing it off?” I asked, stepping into the spray nonchalantly like my cheeks weren't on fire.

“Because I have to help Trev up at his place in the morning and I don't want him smelling you,” he replied simply.

“Pretty sure he wouldn't know it was me.”

“Doesn't matter.”

I nodded as he stuck his head under the water and then grabbed his shampoo and started lathering his hair and beard.

“Shit, I forgot to take the rubber band out and now my fingers are too fucking slick,” he sputtered through soapy lips. “Can you get it?”

He turned away from me, and I took a second to take in his long, lean back. It was muscular without being too much. Perfect really, and that wasn't a term I'd ever thought I'd associate with Abraham Evans. I reached up and slid my fingers through the knotted hair at the back of his head, gripping the ponytail there and pulling the band out as gently as I could. His hair wasn't super long or anything, but it was longer than mine. He wore it in a knot at the back of his head most of the time, and I'd barely ever seen it down. The guys we worked with gave him so much shit for it that I didn't know why he kept it long, but he just took their jokes and laughed it off.

“Why do you keep it so long?” I asked as I set the rubber band on the ledge of the tub.

“Just do, I guess. Don't have to get it cut as often.” He dipped his head under the spray and began rinsing.

“And people don't confuse you with Alex anymore.”

“They didn't really confuse us before,” he said with a shrug, grabbing some body wash as he pushed me back under the spray.

“No?”

“Nah, not really.”

“Do you miss him?” I asked as he poured the soap into my hands.

“Every day. He likes what he's doing though.”

“You think he'll ever come back home for good?”

“Not until after he retires,” Bram replied with a shake of his head.

“Shit, that's like ten years away.”

“A little less than eight,” he argued.

“Counting the days, huh?”

“Hell yeah.”

We were quiet for a few minutes, each cleaning up and rinsing off until the water finally ran clear around us.

“Spend the night?” he finally asked, reaching out to slide his hands up my torso as he met my eyes.

“Don't you have to help Trev?”

“I'll drop you off at your car on my way,” he said easily, leaning in to run his tongue up my neck.

“What are we doing here?” I asked, tilting my head to give him better access.

Bram completely froze with his face still close to my neck. “What do you mean?” he asked.

“You and me. What is this?”

“What are you getting at?” Bram said darkly as he jerked his hands away from my hips.

“Oh, Jesus Christ,” I snapped, immediately irritated. I shoved hard at his belly. “Get off of me.”

“What the fuck is your deal?” he shouted as I scrambled out of the bathtub, grabbing a towel off the rack. I didn't think it was clean, but at that point, I didn't really care, either.

“Is this a onetime thing?” I asked, throwing open the bathroom door and shivering as I let the cold air in. “Back to normal tomorrow?”

“I fucking doubt it!”

“Well then, what the fuck are we doing?” I asked in irritation as he grabbed a towel under the sink and began rubbing it over his face and hair. “Is this a secret?”

“You really want everyone to know that we're fucking?”

“Is that all this is?”

“What the hell do you want me to say?” he bellowed, pulling the towel from his face. “Just tell me. I'm not dealing with your high school drama bullshit. You have something to say—then just fucking say it!”

I took a deep breath and shook my head. “Fuck you. How about that? That work for you?”

“Christ, Anita.”

I turned and made my way into the bedroom, picking up my tank top and underwear on the floor by the bed and quickly pulling them on. I was still fucking freezing, and I wished I had worn more clothes. My jeans were all the way downstairs in the truck. Shit.

“Is there a reason you're acting like a crazy bitch right now?”

“Nope, no reason.”

“Ani—” I lifted my hand to cut him off. I just wanted to go home and crawl into my own bed. I hated that we were fighting about our relationship status. What a joke. I wasn't trying to tie him down. Hell, half the time I didn't even like Bram. I was just curious what the parameters of this little attraction were. We'd just had sex without a condom. Did that mean we were exclusive? Were we going to be super careful to keep things quiet, or was it not a big deal that we were sort of seeing each other?

“I like hanging out with you, and I want to fuck you,” he finally said quietly as he pulled on a pair of boxer briefs. “Probably not what you want to hear, but that's what I've got.”

“You couldn't have said that before, instead of completely freezing up and acting like a pussy?” I yelled back, crossing my arms over my chest. God, I was freezing, and my wet hair was dripping down my back.

“I'm the one acting like a pussy?”

“I just wanted to know what we were doing! I wasn't angling for a fucking marriage proposal.”

“Good,” he replied flatly, bracing his hands on his hips. “That's never going to happen.”

I didn't want to marry Abraham. Not even a little bit. But the way he said those words, so matter-of-fact and emotionless, felt like a punch to the gut.

“Right,” I murmured, looking away from him.

“I'm not marrying anyone. Ever,” he said, his voice softer than it was before.

“Not my business,” I said cheerfully, pulling myself back together as quickly as I could. I liked fighting with Bram. I actually enjoyed pissing him off. But our conversation was hitting topics a little too serious for my taste, and I just wanted it to be over.

“Shit, you're freezing. Come here,” he called, grabbing a shirt from his dresser.

“I'm fine,” I replied, taking a few steps forward.

“Here, put this on.” He started to pull one of his flannel shirts over my shoulders, then stopped and cursed. “You're soaking wet.”

I stood there motionless as he pulled my tank top back over my head and used the towel hanging over his shoulder to dry my hair and back. When he was finished, he put the flannel back on me, his hands sweet and gentle as he pushed my arms into the sleeves and buttoned two buttons on the front of the shirt.

“Better?” he asked, tossing the towel toward the bathroom door.

I nodded.

I was afraid, if I spoke, that my voice would come out weird. He was so fucking confusing. He could make me feel like complete shit in one minute, then take care of me like I was a baby the next. He didn't want me for more than sex, but was concerned when I was feeling chilly.

“Stay the night?” he asked, cupping my face and lifting it toward his.

“Fine,” I grumbled, making him laugh.

He pulled me back into bed, avoiding the wet spot as he pulled my underwear back down my legs. I expected him to pull the flannel off, too, but as soon as he'd thrown my underwear off the edge of the bed, he was rolling me to my side and crowding in behind me.

Spooning. He was spooning me.

Then his hand slid down my hip, pushing his flannel out of the way so he could press his fingers between my legs. I whimpered when his fingers moved over my clit and tried to widen my legs, but one of his legs moved to trap mine together.

“No, don't move,” he said quietly, his mouth near my ear. “You're tired, I'm tired.”

His fingers played while I lay there stuck, and after a few seconds, one slipped inside me, making my hips jerk. He pulled out slowly then pushed in again, before his hand completely stopped moving.

“Sleep,” he murmured, using the hand curled up near his head to press my hair away from my face.

“I can't sleep with you inside me,” I argued, tightening the muscles around his finger.

“Sure you can.”

“No, I really can't.”

“Then I guess you won't sleep,” he said teasingly, gently squeezing his hand cupping my pussy. “Just relax, baby.”

He called me baby. It shouldn't have mattered, but it did.

I closed my eyes and tried to relax but it wasn't happening. I was getting wetter by the second, and it took everything I had not to move my hips against his hand. I breathed deep, clenching my hands in front of me as Bram's body grew heavier behind me.

When I realized he was falling asleep, I made myself ignore the finger still inside me. If I could wait just a few minutes without moving, I could crawl away once he was finally passed out. Finally, when his breathing grew deep and even, I braced myself to move.

And that's when his finger began thrusting again. In and out.

Then another finger. He curled them forward as he jerked his hand up, and my back arched involuntarily, a small sound bursting out of my throat.

“You fucking sneak,” I breathed as he did it again.

I felt a light kiss on my ear as Bram pulled his fingers from me, then he was sliding into me from behind in one long push.

“You really thought I could leave my fingers in you and sleep?” he asked in amusement, thrusting slowly. “While you were dripping down my hand?”

“Yes,” I hissed, reaching back to grip his hip. “And it was one finger.”

He chuckled and grabbed my hand at his hip, pushing it forward until he'd trapped it against the sheets in front of us. “Slow,” he murmured.

I could barely move, and as much as I wanted to fight him on it, I couldn't deny that I really liked having him control the way our bodies moved together. He'd get me there if I was patient.

I gritted my teeth as he just barely sped up his thrusts.

“Better?” he asked.

“Not even a little bit,” I moaned, making him chuckle.

“How about now?” He thrust harder but didn't speed up.

“No.”

“Now?” His hips moved faster, and my eyes drifted shut.

“No,” I said again stubbornly.

He pulled back and slammed in hard, our bodies inching across the bed.

“Yes,” I gasped without him even asking.

“Wanted some sleepy sex,” he groaned into my ear, his hand leaving mine on the bed so he could slide it underneath the flannel shirt and pinch one of my nipples between his fingers. “But I'll take this.”

His hand moved south and I cried out as two of his fingers slid around my clit, barely pinching it as he slid them back and forth with his thrusts.

“Shit,” I moaned as I came, shuddering as my muscles tightened against his hold.

“Oh fuck. Yeah, I'll take this,” he groaned, thrusting again before his hips began to jerk against my ass.

His weight rested against me as we breathed heavily in the aftermath.

“Stay still,” he said quietly as he slid his hand from between my thighs.

He pulled his leg from the top of mine and moved backward, pulling out of me slowly. I heard him get off the bed behind me, then pause.

“That's so fucking sexy,” he said, leaning forward to run his finger over my pussy from behind. I shuddered against the movement, and he groaned. “Every time you tighten up, my cum drips out. Jesus. I think I'm having a heart attack.”

I snickered as he kissed my ass cheek and then stepped away from the bed and moved into the bathroom. When he came back out, he was carrying a wet washcloth, and without any warning, he leaned over me and cupped it between my legs.

“Roll over,” he ordered, cleaning me up as I followed his instructions.

“Thanks,” I mumbled quietly when he pulled the washcloth away.

“No problem. You ready for bed?”

He walked back into the bathroom, and I could hear the sink running for a minute before he came back empty-handed.

“Actually, I'm wide awake now,” I answered brightly, sitting up cross-legged. “And hungry.”

“I'm going to be worthless tomorrow,” Bram complained, looking at the alarm clock on his nightstand. “Come on, I'll feed you.”

He pulled me up from the bed and dragged me downstairs, lifting me up to sit on the counter when we got to the kitchen.

“Ooh, ice cream,” I ordered when he opened up the freezer door. “That's what I want.”

He handed me the carton and a spoon, then leaned against the counter across from me, watching as I dove in.

“You want some?” I asked around the spoon as I shoveled a bite into my mouth.

“No.” He smiled.

“Fine. But it's really good.”

“I know. It's mine,” he said drily.

“So what are you and Trev doing tomorrow?”

“I'm really sorry about tonight,” he said at the same time.

“Huh?” I asked in confusion.

“All that shit at dinner,” he clarified, running his hand over his beard.

“Not your fault,” I said quickly, shaking my head.

“Yeah, it was.”

“Just drop it.”

“He shouldn't have yelled at you like that,” Bram pressed. “If I would have known—”