“Remiel!” I yelled again, feinting to one side, following up with a quick slash to the abdomen that brought another rent in his clothes as my sword bit into his skin again. “If you leave now, maybe he won’t kill you,” I taunted, pressing harder, buoyed by the taste of success.
“I know my duty,” Raziel said softly, thrusting from the shoulder, his actions slow, almost clumsy. I took the opening, my sword piercing his shoulder. Barely flinching, he came at me again, staggering a little. As I brought up my sword, he neatly stepped into it, his movement
fluid and in complete control.
“Raziel!” I screamed as my sword pierced his heart and he caught hold of me, losing his own sword as he clung to my arms to stay aloft. I never in a million years thought I would kill him. I guess, maybe I thought he’d give up after a while, or he’d run off after Remiel got there, or he’d kill me first. But there wasn’t any shock or surprise on his face as he held tight to me.
“Wait…” I let go of the sword, and it disappeared, causing the blood to gush from his chest at an alarming rate. “I didn’t mean to… I…”
Raziel fell to his knees, his hands falling away weakly and I helped him lie back on the pavement, my hands cupping over the wound.
“Lie still, I can fix this, I know I can.” I took a shuddering breath, trying to gather my Grace to heal him before it was too late.
Raziel’s hands covered mine. “It is too late for me, I’ve made my choice.”
“What…?” My brow crumpled as I realized the full import of his sacrifice. “I can fix you and then you’ll just be Fallen. It’s not that bad, you might even like it.” I smiled encouragingly, my hands starting to glow as I pushed my healing Grace into his wound, not bothering to try to ground myself, there wasn’t time.
Raziel grimaced in pain as the wound started to knit together, but slowly… too slowly. “Merceline…” he groaned, letting go of my hand to place it over my heart. “I choose… another path.”
“No…” I pushed harder, but his Grace flowed into me faster than I could give mine to him. I felt it suffuse my entire body, more Grace than I’d ever absorbed before, and it made me dizzy. I tried to pull away from the flow, but it was too overwhelming.
I couldn’t move. In a paralyzed stupor as Raziel poured his lifeforce into me, my head swam, and I fought to stay conscious.
And then it eased and I could breathe again, the world spinning in a kaleidoscope of color as my body absorbed the Grace. I became aware of a soft nimbus of golden light suffusing my skin, bright in the darkened parking lot.
At first I thought my eyes were playing tricks on me, my head still too spinny to hold a coherent thought in my brain, but I realized Raziel’s dying body started to crumble as though made of ash. Even as Raziel’s hand fell away, it broke apart into chunks of glowing cinders, and I could do nothing but stare stupidly at him fading away into nothingness. In mere seconds, the angel was nothing more than a pile of ash, the dying embers of his Grace winking out at last.
“What’s all the ruckus about?”
I heard Remiel’s drawl as he arrived on the scene, but I was too numb to so much as turn my head in his direction. All I could do was stare at the smudge on the ground where Raziel had lain.
“Hey, you alright?” Remy crouched down in front of me, waving his fingers in front of my face when I didn’t reply. “What’s goin’ on?”
Tears slipped down the sides of my face as I tried to say the words that wouldn’t come. I’d killed a man. Not just a man, an angel. My own guardian angel, in a way. Hadn’t he been looking out for me? Hadn’t he spent a year in a hell dimension for me? And what had he done? Given me the last of his Grace, sacrificing himself for me. How could I live with myself?
“Hey… answer me.” Remiel grabbed me by the shoulders and shook, drawing a soft cry of pain from my lips as he pressed on the cut at my shoulder.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” Parker yelled, keys in hand as he spotted us in the parking lot. “Get away from her.”
“Hey, she called me, Cochise,” Remy scowled, making no move away from me in the slightest, though he did let go of my wounded shoulder.
“I said leave her alone.” Parker’s voice grew low and threatening as he approached, but Remiel ignored him, patting me lightly on the cheek.
“What’s wrong, sugar?”
I focused on his eyes, the same bright blue as my own. Or did I look different? My skin still glowed like a lightning bug. “He’s gone,” I murmured, no strength to my voice.
“Who’s gone?”
“One minute he was there and the next…” I swallowed back a wave of nausea as my head turned, sending a new wave of dizziness through me.
“Merce… are you okay?” Parker crouched beside me, trying to get me to look at him, but I couldn’t tear my gaze away from the scorched remains of Raziel.
“I can’t believe he tried to kill me…”
“Kill you…?” Parker choked on the word. “Who tried to kill you? Jesus, is that blood?” I felt his fingers probe at the wound on my shoulder, but it didn’t hurt anymore. Nothing hurt, I just couldn’t get back into my own head. “Mercy, answer me. Why are you glowing? And who tried to kill you?”
“For Pete’s sake, will you shut the hell up?” Remiel scowled, waving absently at Parker who froze mid crouch. “Now that’s more like it. Gets so a body can’t even think no more, all that racket,” he muttered, pushing past him to haul me up to my feet. “Listen to me, sweetheart. You’re all addlepated, and I can guess why. You got to pull yourself out of it or you won’t be makin’ sense. Do you hear me?”
I heard him right enough, I just didn’t know how to do it. Nodding weakly, I trusted him to keep me on my feet, my bones felt like they were made of rubber.
“You got to connect to the Earth again, y’hear? Stomp your feet some, wake ‘em up.” It sounded stupid, but I did as he instructed, stomping my feet in place. Oddly enough, it did serve to shake me out of it. “Good, now let some of that energy out of your head before it explodes, send it on down to Hades, you understand?”
How could I have forgotten? I practiced my grounding techniques, picturing roots that extended from my feet into the Earth, sending the excess energy down until I started to feel a bit more in control. Remy held me until I regained enough of my balance to stand up straight again, and I started to feel much better. I still felt light headed, but at least I could think again.
“Why did you freeze Parker?” I frowned, realizing he still crouched in place beside us.
“He was on my last nerve, gettin’ you even more riled up. I needed him to shut up so we could talk about what happened without him realizin’ what you are.”
“He already knows about me.” I laid a hand on Parker’s cheek, not liking to see him so still even though I knew he’d be fine in a few minutes.
“You want me to make him forget?” Remy offered, and I shot him a sharp look.
“You can do that?”
“Sometimes,” he shrugged. “It don’t always last for good, but I can make someone forget something short term most of the time. It helps if someone’s seen somethin’ can’t be explained away by normal circumstances.”
“No, I don’t want him to forget.” It was too nice not having to keep secrets from my closest friends. I had to wonder though, could I do the same? Would Daphne be better off forgetting about Sam? At least for a while until the pain faded? It killed me to see her in such misery, no doubt why Sam hadn’t stuck around to watch it himself. I couldn’t think about that though, there were other pressing matters to discuss.
“You mind tellin’ me who bought the big one here?” Remy nudged at Raziel’s ashes with the tip of his boot.
“It was Raziel.” It hurt to say his name. “I’d rather wait for Parker to wake up before I go through it all though, I don’t want to have to say it twice.”
“Suit yourself,” Remy shrugged, digging into the pocket of his jeans for a pack of matches, he lit up a cigarette. I moved a couple of steps away to avoid the plume of smoke, deciding to try sitting again to avoid the worst of it, and to ease Parker’s mind when he woke up and found me in a different position.
Closing my eyes, I concentrated on taking slow, deep breaths, shaking off the last of the dizziness as my body adjusted to Raziel’s Grace. With my eyes closed, I felt more in control, less distracted by the glow that lingered on my skin. I felt different. Stronger since the wooziness had worn off.
“Answer me, Merce.” Parker unstuck, his anguish palpable, and my eyes popped open as I reached up to stroke the side of his face.
“It’s okay, I’m alright. A little shaken up, but I survived it pretty unscathed.”
“But your arm…” Parker frowned, touching the sliced fabric at my shoulder, still stained with my blood, but I slipped it off to show him the smooth, unblemished skin beneath.
“It’s fine now, Raziel saw to that.”
“Raziel was here? Did he chase away whoever was trying to kill you?”
“Not exactly.” Taking a deep breath, I told my story gravely, stopping for questions as they popped up.
“Jesus Christ…” Parker brushed his hand over his face after I had nothing left to say. “I can’t believe those fuckers actually came after you like that.”
“Christ ain’t got nothin’ to do with it.” Remy shook his head. “Am I the only one who sees this as a good thing?”
“A good thing?” I blinked. “How do you figure that? I’m on God’s hit list now. How is that a good thing?”
“‘Cause I can pack up and go home now. Ain’t no one can mess with you now, gorgeous. You’re burstin’ with more power than any creature on this hunk of rock.”
“Pack up and go home? Now that I know I’m marked for death? That makes total sense.”
Except for not at all.
“Let him go, we don’t need him,” Parker said softly, laying his hand over mine. “We can handle whatever else they send your way.”
“Y’all are missin’ the point here,” Remy interrupted. “Yeah, He sent his boy out to put you down, but you represented. Now they’ll know not to fuck with you.” He nudged at Raziel’s remains again. I really wished he’d stop doing that.
“You expect me to believe they won’t send anyone else after me?” Somehow I couldn’t quite bring myself to accept that.
“So what if they do? You put ol’ Raze down cold and that was before he hit you with his Grace. Ain’t no angel stands a chance at takin’ you down now.” Remiel’s grin stretched wide.
Only I hadn’t defeated Raziel at all. He’d stepped into that final blow, I was sure of it. If any other trained soldiers came after me, I wouldn’t stand a chance, Grace or no Grace. That tiny tidbit I’d left out of my story though; I couldn’t stand the thought of bringing any shame to Raziel’s memory. Not that I thought his sacrifice shameful at all, but the church’s stance on suicide was well documented, and I had to think they echoed that stance up above.
Then again, maybe Raziel didn’t have to worry about that or anything else anymore. Did angels have souls? Did they get into Heaven when they spent most of their lives up there, or did they go somewhere else? Looking at the pile of ash, I couldn’t help but wonder if that was it for him.
“What about this?” I waved my fingers through the air, watching the faint trail of light that glowed in the darkness. “I can’t go walking around like this all the time. People will freak out.” Of course I could make myself dim and drift through life like a ghost the way Sam used to. Not exactly a comforting thought.
“It’ll wear off.” Remy shrugged, unconcerned. “You’re already glowing less than you were when we got here.”
“I am?” I stared at my arm, I couldn’t see any difference.
“Yeah, it’s a lot less noticeable,” Parker nodded, stretching up to a standing position and holding his hands out to help me up. “Come on, I’ll take you home. We can worry about what this all means in the morning.” I put my hands in his and took the help up, not offering any objection when he wrapped a protective arm around my shoulders.
“Great, if you’ve got this I can get back to a sweet little somethin’ I was workin’ on.”
“So sorry my nearly getting killed put a damper on your night,” I muttered sourly. Not that he’d done me a whole lot of good anyway. If Raziel had been truly bent on killing me I don’t think I would have lasted long enough for him to get there.
“Don’t sweat it, sweetcheeks.” He waved me off, missing the edge of sarcasm completely. “If it’s all the same to you I think I’ll be headin’ for home soon though. You don’t need me at your beck and call no more, you got this.”
“Because the craphole motel room is so much more appealing than Adam’s place?” My face scrunched up in confusion. “Whatever, do what you want, you don’t owe me anything.”
“I ain’t goin’ back to the place we met, if you must know, missy,” he sniffed. “I’m goin’
home
. I got my own place in Texas, I think it’s high time I head back there.”
“Oh. Then you’re
leaving
, leaving.” Somehow I couldn’t picture him owning property, but of course he’d had years and years to accumulate it, like Adam. Just because he’d been living in squalor didn’t mean he didn’t have plenty of money stashed away for a rainy day. “Well then, it was nice knowing you, Remy. Thanks for all your help.” I offered him a hand and he took it, pulling me off balance so that I tumbled closer to him, my other hand pressing up against his chest.
“You don’t got to look so sad, sweetness. We’ll see each other again someday. Until then, let me give you somethin’ to remember me by.” Without any warning his lips descended over mine in a nicotine flavored kiss. I heard Parker start to swear behind me, but before he could take a step, I blasted Remiel in the chest with my Grace, knocking him on his ass in an impressive shower of sparks.
“Not cool.” I wiped the back of my hand across my mouth, feeling a little bad when I saw how far I’d thrown him. “Shit, are you okay?” I started forward, but Parker caught hold of my arm, keeping me in place.
“He got what he deserved. Maybe next time you’ll think twice about how you treat a lady,” Parker simmered beside me.
“Damn, your claws got sharp.” Remy rubbed at his chest with a groan. “Sorry, my mistake,” he said, slowly pushing himself to his feet. “I guess I learned my lesson. Take care, kitty cat. I’ll see you around.” Still rubbing his chest, Remiel strolled away, his boots echoing on the pavement.