Authors: B.L. Mooney
I looked at her bedroom and back to her. “Are you asking my
permission to bring a guy home?”
“No. I’m asking you to leave so I can bring a guy home.”
“Oh.” It was her apartment, and I shouldn’t have been offended
she was asking me to leave. I should have been grateful for a place to stay and
understanding when she needs her space. I was, but I was also irritated. If it
was going to cramp her style to have me stay here, she should have said so
before agreeing to have me over. I slowly picked up my artwork that I brought
home from work and put it away.
“Don’t be mad. I’d just feel funny about having sex with you in
the next room.” She helped me pick up my things to move me a little faster.
“You can come back tomorrow night.”
“You want me to leave for the whole night? I just thought you
meant for an hour.”
“God, I hope you’re wrong about only needing an hour.” She
followed me as I went to my room to pack. “Look, I’ve been going to other
people’s houses for the last week, but I’m more comfortable in my own home. You
don’t have to take everything.”
“Oh, yes, I do. I’m not going to stay here on the condition that
if you get lucky I get kicked out.” Stacy rolled her eyes. “Well, aren’t you
kicking me out?”
“Okay, yes, but don’t you understand? Would you be able to have
sex with someone in the next room?”
I threw the last of my things in the bag. “I know how to stay out
of the way. It’s not as if I would join you!”
Stacy followed me back out to the living room. “Hell, Rebecca. If
I thought you would be up for that, you could stay, but I don’t need your prude
attitude looking at me in the morning when . . .” She walked over and opened
the door to a tall blond. “What’s your name again?”
“Dan.” He looked in and smiled at both of us.
Stacy shut the door. “When Dan leaves in the morning.”
“You don’t even know that man’s name!”
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about! It’s my business to do
what I want, and I don’t need you to judge it.”
I grabbed my bags, my portfolio for work, and my purse. “Don’t
worry. What I’m judging you on right now is not who you decide to sleep with.”
I opened the door and waved Dan in.
I got down to my car and put my bags by the trunk. I wasn’t sure
where to go. I knew it would be awkward to ask Ryan if I could move in there,
even temporarily. We hadn’t slept together yet, and I didn’t want him to think
I was moving in and never leaving. I was looking through my purse and couldn’t
find my keys. I started checking my pockets and closed my eyes when I realized
they must still be upstairs. Wonderful.
I didn’t hold out much hope, but I walked over to the call box
and pressed Stacy’s apartment. I couldn’t get in without my keys. Of course,
she didn’t answer. I thought about just sitting there and waiting until Romeo came
back down, but the way Stacy talked he would have still been there in the morning.
I didn’t want to have to make this call before I left my keys, and now I really
didn’t want to make it. Asking if I could come back was hard enough, but asking
for a ride to come back was pure torture.
“Hello.” Vicki answered quickly and sounded as if she were in a
good mood.
“Hi, Vicki.”
“Rebecca. It’s kind of late. Is everything okay?”
How do I say this? I didn’t want to tell Vicki everything that was
going on. It was Stacy’s business, but I needed to say something so she knew it
wasn’t my decision to leave. “I’m sorry to bother you.” I sighed. “Stacy needs
her space so she can entertain. Can I come back and stay with you? I don’t feel
like getting kicked out every other night.”
I could almost hear Vicki smile through the phone. “Of course, we
would love to have you here with us. Come on over.”
“Oh, well, I kind of left my keys upstairs in Stacy’s apartment
and she’s . . . otherwise occupied, so she didn’t answer the call from down
here.”
“I’ll be right there. Go wait in the café just around the corner.
I don’t want you on the street this late by yourself.”
I thanked Vicki and headed for the café. I really shouldn’t have had
coffee that late, but I really needed one. I set my bags down and went to the
counter. I received a strange look when I ordered decaf and asked if they could
make it taste as though it were regular coffee. A true coffee fanatic would
have thought that was funny. My phone beeped and saved me from the awkward
exchange.
Ryan responded to my text that I was moving back in with Vicki.
K. Thx 4 info.
That’s it? I just stared at my phone until the guy cleared his
throat to hand me my coffee. “Thanks.” I stared at the message all the way over
to the table. Maybe he was busy. What if he was hurt that I didn’t ask if I could
stay with him? Should I respond and ask? I drank my lousy coffee and looked at
my crappy message until Vicki showed up.
“What game are you playing?” Vicki kicked my shoe to get my
attention.
“I’m not playing a game.” I realized she was referring to the
message I was staring at and put my phone in my pocket. “Just reading my text.
Thanks for coming to pick me up. I’m sorry you had to come after me.”
Vicki helped me with one of my bags. “It’s really no trouble. I’m
glad you called. Ashley will be so excited you’re staying again. She was so
disappointed that you only stayed when she was with her friend.”
“I like Ashley. You’ve got a great kid there, Vicki.” We put my
bags in her trunk.
“Thank you. She is great. I’m so thankful that Matt talked me
into having her.” Vicki shut her trunk and walked to the driver’s side door.
I slowly walked to my door. Did I respond to that? Vicki didn’t
normally talk much about her past. I got in and decided to take the opportunity
while I had it. “You didn’t want kids?”
“Oh, I wanted a whole house full of children.” She started the
car and put on her seatbelt. “Are you hungry?”
“No, I ate already, but you can get something if you want. Why
didn’t you have more children?”
Vicki was quiet for a minute before pulling out of the parking
space. “Sometimes life doesn’t go according to plan, and you’re left to deal
with things that no one should ever have to deal with. It’s all worked out now,
but Matt and I had to deal with something very big before we had Ashley, and I
wasn’t sure I could be a good mom after that.”
“Well, you’ve done an excellent job with Ashley.” I wanted to ask
what they had to deal with, but didn’t have the nerve.
“Thank you for saying that. You don’t know how much that means to
me.”
I was sitting at my desk, waiting for Stacy to bring me
my keys and still wondering what was up with Ryan and his stupid message. I
should have worked out with him this morning, but I didn’t have my car, and I
wasn’t going to ask Vicki to drive me in so early. Besides, I loved having
breakfast with Ashley.
Stacy came in and sat in the chair in front of my desk. For the
first time since I’d known her, she looked really tired. Apparently, she did
get more than an hour with her friend. I really didn’t want to hear about it,
and I was still a little pissed she kicked me out. “Did you remember to bring
my keys?”
She dug in her pocket and tossed them on the desk. “Are you still
mad?”
“Yes.” I picked up the keys and put them in my purse.
“Maybe if you took a guy home once in a while you’d be more
understanding.”
“I’m not mad because you brought someone home. I’m mad because
you kicked me out. I could have gone to my room and left you alone.”
“I was worried you’d hear us. I’m not exactly reserved like you.”
Stacy started to get up and then sat back down. “I mean you thought it would
have only taken an hour. If you knew how to really enjoy yourself, it would
take way longer than an hour.”
“I couldn’t care less how often you bring someone home or if you
even know his name before he gets there. For you to say I’m a prude, reserved,
and that I have no idea how to enjoy myself only pisses me off more.” I turned
back to my computer.
“I’m just trying to express my side of things. Please don’t be
mad.” I still wouldn’t look at her. “Rebecca, please tell me what to do to make
it better. I didn’t get any sleep last night after our fight.”
I stopped typing and sighed before looking at her. “I think it’s
best that I stay with Vicki and Matt until my apartment gets cleared up. I
don’t want to fight with you, either. You have to stop calling me a prude. I’m
not. I don’t care what you do as long as you’re careful, and last night you
weren’t careful. I was worried, not judgmental, when you didn’t know his name.
If you don’t know the most basic of information about someone you bring home,
what else don’t you know about him?”
Stacy actually looked shocked as if she’d never thought of that
before. She nodded and stood up. “You’re right. I’m sorry. If he were crazy, he
could have hurt both of us, and I wouldn’t have forgiven myself for that. I’ve
got to check a few things before our meeting, but are we good now?”
“We’re good. See you at the meeting.” I looked at my phone and
checked my email. Still nothing from Ryan. I started to wonder if I had done
something else to make him upset before our brief exchange last night. I wanted
to send him something, but I really didn’t want to seem clingy. I hoped I was
just over thinking things.
I over thought them right up to the time for our meeting. I wasn’t
sure I really wanted to go and sit in the same room as him. I decided to go a
little early to see if I could get a feel from him about what was going on. I
didn’t see him on the way as I’d hoped to. He wasn’t in the meeting already,
either. I sat in the chair next to where he usually sits and waited for him to
come in. I kept waiting, but he wasn’t coming. Everyone was there except for
him and Matt.
Matt walked in and addressed the group. He was few minutes late,
but Ryan finally walked in and apologized for being late. He sat next to me and
flashed a quick grin. Too quick to really tell me anything about his mood or
attitude towards me. He put his notebook in his lap and started writing. I thought
he was taking notes until he tilted it my way.
Dinner my place?
I took my notebook and put it in my lap.
C
an’t.
Even if I hadn’t already promised Ashley I’d have dinner with
them tonight to make up for the weekend she was with her friend, I wouldn’t
agree to anything without finding out what that message meant.
He wrote again.
W
hy?
I started to write my response, and I wanted to keep it brief on
purpose, but I didn’t want there to be a misunderstanding, and if I wrote only
the first word, there would have been a big misunderstanding.
Plans—Ashley.
Tomorrow?
Maybe.
I closed my notebook and set it back on the table. I didn’t want
to write any more and draw attention to our conversation. Plus, I really wanted
to know about that message.
It was a long and excruciating meeting, sitting so close to Ryan,
watching him scowl throughout most of it. I could tell he wasn’t paying any
attention, and I think Matt noticed, too. I had to nudge him a couple of times
to get him to answer Matt’s questions. When the meeting was finally over, I got
up and walked to my office, hoping Ryan would follow.
I barely made it around my desk before Ryan came in and closed
the door. “I’m sorry, Rebecca.” He shifted, obviously nervous and unsure of
what to say. “I really didn’t mean to upset you. I was in the middle of
something, and I was trying to be funny or cute or . . . I don’t know.” He ran
his hands through his hair. “I just didn’t think the message would upset you
this much.”
I crossed my arms. “How was any of that cute or funny? I thought
it was rude and cold. I thought you were mad that I didn’t ask to stay with
you.”
“Of course, I’m not mad.” Ryan gave me a sideways look. “You
really thought it was cold?”
“What’s warm and fuzzy about ‘K thanks for info’?”
Ryan’s face scrunched up in confusion before he scrambled for his
phone. “No, no, no. Please, no, no . . . Oh God.” He stared at his phone and
sank to the chair. “This cannot be happening.”
“What is it?” I rounded the desk and took his phone from him. I
laughed at the explicit message he sent to someone named Bill. I stopped
laughing when he grabbed my hips and pulled me to his lap. “Oh, I wish you had
sent your messages to the right people. Last night could have been a lot of
fun.”
“There’s always tonight.” He nuzzled my neck. “Or we could lock
the door and have fun now.”
Stacy’s comments about me being a prude or reserved flashed in my
mind. I wanted Ryan, but did I want our first time to be in my office? I looked
at the door and considered locking it just to make out, but then reason came
back to me and I stood up. “Not here.” I went back around my desk and sat down.
“Everything okay?” Ryan leaned forward and narrowed his eyes.
I waved my hand as if it were no big deal. “Stacy had made some
comments I didn’t like and I just proved her right.”
“I can only imagine what she said, but don’t believe a word of
it.”
Vicki came in as Ryan finished his sentence. “Don’t believe a
word of what?”
I waved my hand again. “Nothing. Ryan was just leaving.”
“Sure, sure.” He rounded the desk and kissed my cheek to whisper.
“This conversation is not over.”
Vicki watched him leave and then quirked an eyebrow at me.
“Anything you want to talk about?”
“Yes. I’m having dinner with Ryan tomorrow night.” I went back to
gathering the materials we were going to work on and felt her staring at my back.
I knew I was defeated and she wouldn’t let it rest until I told her what he was
talking about. I turned around and faced her. “Stacy said I got mad because I’m
a reserved prude or something like that and—”